Well, we know what Danny did after the circus, and we know what the Titans did. What did Star do after she ran off? It's been a long night for our crew.
When Danny poked his head through the wall of the train car—intangible, of course—he was surprised to find that the lamp was still on. Phasing the rest of his body through the wall, Danny dropped silently to the ground and transformed back into his human self.
Now bound by the limits of mortality, a wave of fatigue settled heavily on his shoulders. He visibly drooped, letting out a tired sigh before walking quietly to his bed. Which, really, was only a "bed" in a vague sense.
While traveling, he and Star rode in one of the few passenger cars on the train. During their week-long stops, however, they shared a shabby little car set up as a bedroom. Star got her own rickety cot, Danny a lumpy mattress on the floor, since he was bigger and needed the extra room. He got the right side of the dresser, she got the left, which was fine by Danny because one of her drawers was always getting stuck, even if one of his had a hole in it. Taking up about a third of the already limited space was the tiniest, most pitiful bathroom he'd ever seen.
Freakshow had been so generous making allowances for their "human" needs.
But, despite the fact that all he had was a mattress on the floor, Danny wanted nothing more than to collapse onto that mattress and go out like a light. His talk with Vlad had been hugely frustrating, his report to Freakshow afterward equally so. Especially since the ringmaster had trouble understanding the concept "don't shoot the messenger" when he was given bad news, and Danny had to endure his irrational anger at Vlad's lack of progress. An hour of listening to that guy's raving would exhaust anyone.
He'd already changed out of costume before heading out to Vlad's, so he had no qualms about hitting the sack as he was, except for one little problem.
Star had apparently been waiting up for him; she was fast asleep on his mattress, with his blanket and pillow. And, okay, maybe it was kind of a little bit adorable, but Danny really needed some sleep.
Kneeling down beside the mattress, Danny poked her in the shoulder. "Star," he whispered, "Wake up." For good measure he gently tugged on a lock of her fair hair, still damp from the shower she'd taken to wash off all her white makeup.
Her eyes opened slowly at first, and then all at once she sat bolt upright, pushing slightly-wavy hair from her face with both hands.
"You!" she accused, eyebrows slanting downward in irritation. "I waited for you forever!"
Danny yawned, switching position so that he sat beside her on the mattress. "Well I'm back now, same as always. So now you can give me back my bed and I can go to sleep."
"This is not the same as always," she argued, crossing her arms and giving him a stubborn look.
I'm too tired for this, Danny thought. Nevertheless, he had to ask. "Why isn't it the same as always?"
Her expression flickered momentarily to one of anxiousness. Instead of answering, she glanced around quickly. She leaned over to the opposite side of the mattress and grabbed something off the floor—their notebook.
They used the notebook to communicate whenever they didn't want Freakshow eavesdropping on their conversations. Not that they had many secrets to keep from him anymore; they'd run out of ideas for escape after the first month.
But Danny didn't want to talk—or write, for that matter. He wanted to sleep. So when Star opened up the notebook and picked up the pen that rested on the inside, Danny snatched the pen right out of her fingers.
"Can't this wait till morning? I'm exhausted and it's the middle of the night. I just want to sleep," he wrote on the open page.
Star quickly wrote back. "It is morning. And you don't think I'm tired? I think I got like three hours of sleep!"
"All the more reason this can wait."
With that, he plucked the notebook from her grasp and threw it across the floor to the other corner of the room by her cot, along with the pen. Ignoring Star's cry of outrage, he blocked her when she tried to rise and retrieve the stolen items, placing both hands on her shoulders to hold her in place.
"Seriously, Star, whatever it is can wait until tomorrow. Or later today. Whatever. We have to do another show, remember? We both need sleep."
She stared at him, eyes full of something strange and tense that he couldn't identify, lips pulled into a slight pout. And she looked sleepy and grumpy and her hair was nowhere near the styled perfection she'd always kept it in back at Casper High, but by some bizarre logic that just made her all the more endearing.
Danny had been trying, lately, to avoid a lot of familiar contact with Star, even though the longer he refrained the more preoccupied he became with the urge to touch her. Although she'd never voiced a complaint, he'd begun to notice that she got kind of skittish if he got too close, and he didn't want to make things awkward between them.
But right then he reasoned with himself that he was tired, so he wasn't thinking as clearly. He reached out and touched her cheek, lightly tracing the shadow under her eye with his thumb. "We're both tired. Let's just go to sleep," he coaxed.
Maybe Star wasn't thinking as clearly either, because she closed her eyes and leaned just slightly into his touch, surprising him.
She sighed, slumping in defeat. "Hey, Danny?" she asked quietly.
"Yeah?"
She reached up and held his hand in place for a moment, leaving her eyes closed. "I know I've said this before but… I'm really sorry."
He moved his hand to lift her chin, giving her an encouraging smile. "I know I've said this before, but it's not your fault."
She gave a half-hearted smile in return. "Yeah. You keep saying that."
"We both repeat a lot of things."
"Mm-hm."
Danny realized he'd been leaning toward her and pulled away, dropping his hand. He cleared his throat.
"So. Bed then."
"You mean cot," she corrected, rubbing her eye.
"Yeah. Off to cot with you. I'm sleepy."
Star crossed her arms, making no move to leave. "Well maybe I feel like punishing you for keeping me waiting and then refusing to talk to me. You'll just have to sleep on the floor." With that she lay down once again, smugly wrapping his blanket around herself and nestling her head into his pillow.
"Fine then. I'll just steal your bed right back."
"Cot," she reminded him.
"Still gonna steal it." He made as if to stand when she rose up on her elbow and grabbed his forearm, fixing him with a sharp glare.
"Don't even think about it, Fenton."
"Well I'm not sleeping on the floor, so your options are to give me my bed back or take your own."
"Cot!"
"Whatever!"
"But my spot is going to be cold and this one is already warm," she whined.
"Fine—here."
Surprising even himself, Danny kicked off his shoes and lay right down next to her, nudging her over with an elbow. He was met with a moment of silence while he waited for his common sense to kick back in and Star to freak out. A few seconds ticked by before he spoke. "Happy now?" he asked.
He didn't dare turn his head to look at her face, but he supposed that when she adjusted the blanket to throw it over him as well that was answer enough.
"It'll do," she muttered. She sounded embarrassed, but nothing worse. "But I don't think this thing was meant for two people. It's not exactly king-sized."
"It's pretty spacious for a crappy mattress."
"Not spacious enough."
Encouraged that she hadn't immediately freaked and bolted, Danny pressed his luck. "Well I guess we'll just have to squish together then."
She cleared her throat awkwardly. "Um. I guess." But neither of them moved.
"Am I freaking you out?" Danny asked.
"I… I don't know. No more than I'm freaking myself out, I think?"
"That's… good?"
"I don't know."
Danny suddenly remembered something. "Uh, Star? Who's going to turn off the lamp?"
She groaned. Throwing her half of the blanket away, she climbed over him and crawled over to the dresser on which the lamp sat, reaching up and twisting the little knob till it clicked and plunged the car into darkness. Danny turned onto his side, facing away from the wall and the spot where Star had just occupied, and was just wondering if she would go back to her own cot after all when he felt her once again clamber over him and plop back down beside him.
"No funny business, Fenton," she warned.
"No, no, of course not. Perfect gentleman and all that."
"Uh-huh."
He waited a few moments in the quiet as she readjusted the blanket, thinking to himself that when they woke up things were going to get extremely awkward. But maybe, in the moment, he didn't really care.
"So. Good night, I guess?"
"The sun's gonna come up in a few hours."
"Star. Just say good night."
"Good night, Danny."
Star listened as Danny's breathing gradually slowed, grew soft and even. The sound failed to soothe her as it usually did.
She'd wanted to tell him about the Teen Titans right away, about her moment of brilliance with Beast Boy (which, frankly, had surprised even her). But she could tell him later, and he was right—they did need sleep.
Especially Danny.
In the darkness, she frowned. Lying on her back, she turned her head in his direction, unable to make out even a faint outline of him. On an impulse she reached out, just enough to touch his back with her fingers and make sure he was still there.
Of course he's still there, she chastised herself. You can hear him, can't you? He didn't just up and leave.
But sometimes, said the voice of doubt, he does just up and leave. Like earlier tonight.
Where had Danny been, those hours she had waited up for him?
Star had no idea. Danny frequently disappeared at night, never giving any warning. He refused to tell her anything about his ventures. Refused to talk about them at all.
Once, months ago, he hadn't come back for three whole days. And when he'd finally trudged into the car around midnight the third night, he'd been pale and disturbingly weak, dark circles under his eyes and a hateful expression on his face.
But no matter how hard she pressed, he wouldn't tell her where he went, or why.
Star had her own theory.
She knew he wasn't out stealing things during his random disappearances. He never brought back any new haul and the other ghosts all claimed they hadn't been out with him. And Freakshow never sent him on a solo robbery. Danny was too important, too valuable, too hard to reclaim if somehow lost; Freakshow would send Star out before letting Danny go alone. He depended on them to protect each other.
She also knew that ever since Freakshow had found out Danny was only half-ghost, he'd been intrigued by the idea. And she knew, from conversations overheard between some of the ghosts, that since she and Danny had joined the crew Freakshow had been… experimenting.
She didn't, however, know what these experiments entailed. She had no idea if they were harmless, conducted purely out of curiosity's sake, or if they were intended for some evil purpose. Probably the latter. She didn't know if the experiments were tests of the limits of Danny's abilities or studies of how those abilities worked. She didn't know if they were painless or painful.
And that, the question of pain or no pain, often kept her up at night.
She didn't know for sure if these disappearances coincided with Freakshow's experiments. But the possibility was enough to make her ache with worry. Which, ironically, was exactly what Danny had been trying to avoid by keeping her out of the loop.
For a moment she was tempted to move closer to Danny's sleeping form simply out of a desire for comfort, but then she froze, giving herself a mental shake and a sharp reprimand.
It was a bad idea sleeping here at all. Don't make it worse. You can't afford to do stuff like this. You're just confusing him and yourself, stupid! You've already ruined his life, don't ruin his only relationship by being… even more stupid!
Star turned onto her side so that her back was to Danny, telling herself that her sudden twinge of regret was for the ruining his life part, not the part where she refused to sleep closer to him.
Maybe, if we ever get out of here, things can be different, came the voice of vain hope.
She curled in on herself and gave a soft sigh. Or maybe not. Would we still be close if we ever left this circus? I don't think I could go back to life just like nothing happened, but what about Danny? He's too good for me. The only reason he would ever have feelings for me is because we're stuck with each other. When is he going to realize that this is all really my fault?
Vain hope felt the need to speak up again. Maybe he's never going to realize it. Because he is just that good a person. The kind of person who just doesn't blame other people. Maybe I've saved him by getting a message to the Teen Titans. Maybe they'll rescue us and then… and then…
And then what? We'll live happily ever after? And what if the Titans don't rescue us? What if they don't even take me seriously?
Star turned over onto her other side, forcing herself to stop asking herself these ridiculous, painful questions. Danny would kill her if she slipped up during the finale just because she hadn't gotten enough sleep.
It all comes down to this, she reminded herself. You got Danny into this. And if all else fails, then you're going to make sure that he can at least rely on you from here on out. You're going to do whatever it takes to do everything you can for him.
Star abruptly sat up. Feeling determined, she got onto her knees and clasped her hands together and squeezed her eyes shut even though the darkness made it unnecessary, and said another prayer.
Okay, whoever is up there. I said I'd do whatever it takes, and I got an answer last time, so here goes again. Please, let the Titans believe me. Let my message be enough. I'll do anything to make up for what I did. Just look at me, I never used to pray, but here I am, and this is my second time! Please, please, please, help us find a way to be free.I'll do anything. I mean it. Anything.
The "Ave" in "Say an Ave" applies to this story in multiple ways, all of which will hopefully become clear by the end of the story. Since this is the second time prayer has come up, I feel I can clarify that one of "Ave's" meanings for this story is, in fact, prayer. "Ave Maria" or "Hail Mary" is a traditional Catholic prayer. Therefore one can surmise that to "say an Ave" means to say the Ave Maria prayer, or, in more general terms, to say any prayer.
While I'm not Catholic, I will be referring to prayer later on in the story. I apologize if the religious tone annoys anyone. I'm not trying to preach to anybody.
Star wants to redeem herself, but she's reached the end of her rope and prayer is where she's turned. Whether you believe her prayers are actually being answered or that she's just using them to help her cope emotionally is up to the each reader's interpretation. As in real life, it's your judgment call.