I do not own True Blood. I only own Tiffani and Lexi.
Story start
Pam sped down the road back to the house. She said it was so the groceries would be alright, but Lexi and Tiffani both knew she was speeding because she was curious about the milkshakes.
"I'm going to make a chocolate one," Tiffani said happily as she imagined all of the sugar.
"You can't have one," Lexi said and Tiffani looked at her with a puppy dog look. "You and sugar equals a scary combination," Lexi said and Tiffani started to whine like a puppy now. "That's not going to work," Lexi said and Tiffani growled.
Tiffani grabbed the peanut butter out of the grocery bag and rolled down the window. "You wouldn't dare," Lexi said as Tiffani held the jar of peanut butter dangerously close to the window. "Fine, you can have a milk shake," Lexi said and Tiffani happily put the peanut butter back in the bag.
Tiffani and Lexi grabbed all of the groceries except one bag. Pam was carrying the bag of ice cream. They put everything up while Pam stared at the blender. "We'll make ours really quick to show you how easy it is," Lexi said as she grabbed the vanilla ice cream and the chocolate syrup. Pam nodded while Tiffani grabbed some tall glasses.
Lexi put some ice cream and chocolate syrup into the blender. She pressed a few buttons and the milkshakes were finished. She let Tiffani pour the milkshakes into two glasses before she cleaned the blender.
"Alright, get your favorite true blood while I'm putting the ice cream in here," Lexi said and Pam grabbed a true blood out of the refrigerator. Pam watched intrigued as the true blood and ice cream mixed together. Lexi poured the milkshake into the glass while Tiffani cleaned the blender this time.
Lexi handed Pam the glass and she and Tiffani both watched as Pam sniffed the milkshake. Pam took a tentative sip before a more normal sip. "I approve," Pam said with a smile before she called Eric.
"What is it Pam?" Eric asked on the other line. Pam had put him on speakerphone, but he did not know this. Tiffani and Lexi listened with smirks on their faces wondering what Pam was going to say.
"You are missing out on something delicious," Pam said with a growl. Pam looked at Tiffani, who got the hint and let out a small moan. An angry growl sounded from Eric and Lexi tried not to laugh. Pam took another sip of her milkshake.
"I told you not to touch her," Eric said growling again after Tiffani let out another satisfied moan.
"I just couldn't resist this sweet treat," Pam said and now Lexi and Tiffani both were trying not to laugh. Eric hung up with another growl and Pam smirked. "He'll be here in a minute," Pam said before leaning against the counter drinking her milkshake.
Not even a minute later, Eric slammed open the front door and ran to the kitchen where he smelled everyone. He looked slightly confused when he saw Tiffani, Lexi, and Pam sitting or standing in the kitchen drinking out of glasses. Eric looked at Pam, who just raised her milkshake towards him a bit.
"You should try them, blood milkshakes are surprisingly delicious," Pam said and now both Lexi and Tiffani did laugh. They had tears in their eyes from laughing so hard while Pam made Eric a blood milkshake.
Lexi looked over at Tiffani, who was sitting on the floor in front of the couch. Lexi was sitting on the couch beside it. Eric was sitting in the seat behind Tiffani and she was resting her back on his legs. Pam was sitting by Lexi.
"Hey Tiffani, I have an idea for something fun to do," Lexi said and Tiffani looked at her with full attention.
"What did you have in mind?" Tiffani asked excitedly and Tiffani pulled out her phone and pressed the buttons that would allow her number to not be traced. "I love your ideas," Tiffani said hoping Lexi would tell her who they were going to prank call.
"I just thought we could give a little call to Maryann," Lexi said and Tiffani cheered before asking for the phone from Lexi. Lexi threw the phone and Tiffani dialed Maryann's number.
"How do you two know her number?" Eric asked and Lexi just smirked.
"We have our ways," Lexi said mysteriously before she heard the phone ringing. Tiffani had put the phone on speakerphone.
A man answered the phone and Tiffani asked to speak to Maryann changing her voice a little bit. She made her voice sound higher pitched. The man asked Tiffani to hold on a moment. Tiffani leaned back on Eric's legs while waiting.
"Hello, this is Maryann, may I help you?" Maryann asked and Tiffani smirked.
"Yes, hello, this is oink Carla, oink oink, and I was wondering, oink, if you knew of a great place, oink, for some bacon, oink oink," Tiffani said in the higher pitched voice. Maryann was silent and all you could hear was her breathing
"Of course, the local butcher has a great selection," Maryann said and Tiffani made a contemplating noise.
"Oink, well I went there, but oink, he said you had a fresher selection, oink," Tiffani said and she smirked when she heard Maryann give a small growl. "I heard oink, that you have a oink, fresh, oink, big, fat, female oink pig at your house that you have, oink, wanted to butcher for a while, oink," Tiffani said and the growl sounded meaner this time.
"You have the wrong number," Maryann said before hanging up.
"Why did you oink after almost every word?" Eric asked as he ran a hand through Tiffani's hair. Tiffani threw the phone back to Lexi.
"Because Maryann can turn into a fat pig," Tiffani said before watching Lexi prank call Maryann.
"Hello," Maryann said on speakerphone again.
Lexi made her voice a little deeper before saying, "Hello, I have been informed that one fat female pig lives on your property. Do you have a license to raise such large pigs?"
Maryann held in the growl that they could all just tell that she wanted to let out. "I have all the requirements completed to be able to have my pet," Maryann said and Lexi made a small hmm noise.
"Well I just wanted to make sure Ma'am. We have heard a few complaints about your animal and I would hate to have to take it away since it is your pet," Lexi said and Maryann sighed.
"Thank you, I will make sure that my pet behaves," Maryann said and Tiffani decided she wanted to hear Maryann growl again.
"Bacon," Tiffani yelled in a lower pitch. Maryann stopped breathing before she actually screamed this time and hung up the phone.