While I Wait
Chapter 10
It had been a month since they had found Rick and while he still hadn't regained any of his memories of he and Kate, they had begun to rebuild their friendship little by little. They still weren't too affectionate with one another, occasionally sitting close on the couch while watching a movie, or giving a hug, maybe a kiss on the cheek as she came and went. He had begun to feel a bit caged in, not being able to leave their home. He knew it was to keep the press away so that they could have some privacy while he got back into his life.
She had done her last appearance for the book tour the night before, coming in well after midnight to Rick asleep on the couch in his office. She decided not to wake him, figuring he would wake up on his own and make his way to their bed.
It had been weird, sleeping in the same bed, so close to one another, but at the same time it didn't feel anything like a romantic relationship. They spoke to each other like they were friends, good friends, the banter was still there, but Kate still felt like he was being distant, even more distant then the Rick she knew back then.
She knew that it would take time, but she didn't realize just how much time and work it would take for them to get back to their life. Sure it had only been two weeks, but it felt like two months. Having him within arms reach, but not being able to reach out when she wanted him, when she needed him.
She stepped out of the shower as he walked through the bathroom door, grabbing the towel and wrapping it around her body.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to just walk in on you." he seemed embarrassed, almost ashamed.
"It's fine, nothing I haven't already let you see, Rick." She laughed, pulling another towel off the counter to dry her hair out.
"I know, I just… " he paused, looking back up and meeting her eyes.
"Stop tiptoeing around me Rick, I won't bite."
"I know."
"Look, this isn't awkward.. I don't want it to be, so here…" she let her towel drop from her body. It hit the floor and he immediately looked towards the ceiling.
"Kate, don't do that to me."
She giggled, walking towards him and grabbing his arms, placing them on her hips. "Look at me.."
He made immediate contact with her eyes, doing his best to avoid her naked body under his hands.
"Look at my body. I promise it's not going to make me feel uncomfortable. I use to fuck you for Gods sake."
He slowly let his eyes drift down her body, her protruding belly keeping him from seeing her lower half, her breast were perky and full. The pregnancy had done wonders for them.
"Kate, you're beautiful."
"Thank you, now stop being a weirdo. I'm tired of you acting like I'm not yours. I'm starting to feel like we are roommates, and not that I don't enjoy your company, but I'm pregnant, and I would like it if the man that got me that this way didn't look at me like I was a foreign object."
"Kate…"
She started to walk past him, out of the bathroom.. "I'm serious Rick. I'm being patient, but I feel like we are in high school at times. You're afraid to touch me, and it scares me. I mean sex isn't the most important thing in our relationship, but I feel like we should be working towards some physical intimacy. I mean I am your fiancé, well I was…"
"No, you still are Kate, I just don't want to pressure you."
"PRESSURE ME?"
"Yeah, I want you to feel comfortable."
She turned around, standing in all her naked glory, propping her hands on her hips. "Do I look uncomfortable? You're the most important person in my life, you already broke through those walls a long time ago. They are gone now, so whenever you wanna make a move, please, feel free to do so…" she laughed, "hint, hint."
He just nodded, not knowing exactly what he should say.
She rolled her eyes and made her way to the dresser, pulling clothes out.
"Okay, so you're frustrated with me.."
"I'm not frustrated with you necessarily. I'm just 6 months pregnant, and I haven't been touched in a while, and it's starting to get to me." The confession was blunt, but it was the truth. She didn't feel sexy anymore, but she wanted his attention, even if it was just a kiss every once in a while. Or maybe she just missed the way he use to pull her in close in the middle of the night and wrap his body around hers.
"So you need sex… is that what you're asking for?"
"No, not at all. I don't need sex, I would like to have sex, but I don't need it." She bowed her head and started to laugh as she pulled her underwear up her legs slowly, her bump making it hard to do anything anymore. "Just forget everything that just happened, I completely embarrassed myself, and I'm stupid."
"Oh come on, you're not stupid…" he walked towards her, she was struggling to clasp her bra, so he grabbed her shoulders and spun her around, knocking her hands out of the way to help her. When the bra was clasped he placed his hands on her shoulders and ran them down her arms, leaning in and placing a kiss on her shoulder. She laughed at his effort.
"You really are the sweetest man I know." She shook her head. "and I'm sorry, I don't want to pressure you."
"You aren't pressuring me Kate, I care about your happiness, and if you're sexually frustrated then I'll do whatever you want."
"No, it's not that. I just miss you." She took a deep breath and swiped her hand over her cheek to clear away a tear that had fallen.
"Please don't cry, don't be upset."
"It's not fair." Now the waterworks were starting, she had tried to keep her emotions controlled, but being six months pregnant was already overwhelming, and now she had to deal with so much more. "I miss you so much."
He pulled her body into his, wrapping his arms tight around her, "I'm here, I'm right here."
"Physically, which is amazing, I'm so happy you're here, but I miss my fiancé, the man who loved me so much, who could barely keep his hands off me."
"I'm trying." He whispered into her hair before placing a kiss on her forehead.
"I know, and I'm just being hormonal."
"How about this. I'm going to make us dinner tonight, and we are going to have a little date."
"Just me and you."
"Just me and you… I'll ask mother and Lex to give us a night alone. I know they've been hovering over the both of us, and maybe we need more alone time so that we are forced to spend time alone together. I mean our home always has someone in it, and I think it's time that they go home and let us be alone for a while."
"Yeah, alone would be nice." She pressed her face into his neck and took a deep breath, inhaling his scent.
"Don't do that to me Kate. I'm really trying to be a gentleman."
"So… I'm gonna have to make all the moved to get you to be intimate with me aren't i?"
"You're the one that requested no sex."
"But that doesn't mean we cant make out a little," she teased. "play with each other, tease each other. It will make things more comfortable and then… it will lead us there."
"Okay, how about this.. I promise we will work on it, if you promise to let me lead."
"Okay, I'll let you lead, now get in the shower.. Burke will be here in an hour for your session."
XX
Burke had been quite accommodating to Castles needs. Making house calls because he knew that Rick couldn't quite leave the loft yet. They had their sessions in Ricks office and Kate usually used that time to run errands, allowing them privacy.
"So how have things been between you and Kate?"
"Getting better. I know she is frustrated, she wants more intimacy and I just feel awkward touching her."
"How intimate have you all been?"
"Well, we haven't really been intimate at all. I mean, we sleep in the same bed. Today she dropped her towel in front of me, and forced me to look at her. I think she's starting to take it personal when it really isn't personal at all."
"That's to be expected. She is 6 months pregnant Rick, and the father of her child doesn't remember ever being intimate with her."
"I know, and it makes me feel like an ass."
"Do you care about her?"
"Of course I do, I love her, I've always loved her, but it's all just really hard to wrap my head around."
"Stop overthinking it. Look, Kate isn't going to reject your advances, because she is already comfortable with being intimate with you. You're going to have to take things slow but it doesn't mean you can't touch her or kiss her whenever you want. In fact, I want that to be a goal for this week, when you feel the urge to touch her or kiss her, just do it. Don't think about it."
"I'll do my best, but if she shoves me away…"
"Oh she wont, believe me."
"Has she said something?" Rick knew Burke couldn't answer that, but he could tell by the look in his eyes that she had in fact mentioned it. "Okay, so she has. So I need to just shake it off and do it."
"That would be my recommendation. I think it could really change things for you all, make things easier."
"Okay, I'll do it. I'll pick the perfect time and I'll kiss her."
"Rick, don't schedule it. Just do it when it feels natural."
"Well we are having a little miniature date tonight, I'm making dinner for us. So the opportunity might present itself if I make it romantic enough."
"Just remember to be yourself, don't try and be what you think she wants. She already loves you."
"Which is so weird."
Burke laughed, "Not for me, I've been seeing her for years, and she has always loved you, it was apparent to me before it was apparent to her."
"Really?"
"Yeah, really. So jump in, swim around, test out the waters."
"I think I will."
XX
Next up is the dinner, and we will see if Rick is brave enough to kiss her.
Reviews are always lovely, and if I get 20 I'll post tomorrow.