EPOV
I watched Bella drive away yet again, only this time I didn't try anything with her. I didn't want to make her angry with me, I would have to respect what she was saying about not wanting to pursue anything with me now that we work together. I don't like it, and I am not giving up. I just realize that me trying to convince her of the reasons why we would work, only serves to make her more anxious and pull back. I need to pull back and make her come to me.
I could tell by her face just now, how she pressed her thighs together and bit her lip, which is her tell, she was thinking something about us. Not sure what exactly, maybe it was my imagination. But, when I told her to sleep well, I couldn't help but imply that she likely won't because I do want her to be thinking of me, as I have of her every night since the night I gave her back her sweater. I got in my car and slid my tie off and tossed it angrily n the passenger seat. This job was supposed to be such a good thing for my career, so why did I hate every fucking second of it?
As I was lying there in bed, I could still hear her laughter from tonight when I tickled her. I loved making her laugh. I love being playful with her, I miss that since I began working along side her. I miss the feeling her soft hair wrapped around my fingers, the taste of her soft lips, and the smell of her soft skin. That is why I hated this stupid internship. I am not a patient man, and waiting for Bella Swan to realize how right we could be together, was going to make me nuts.
BPOV
Damn him. Edward Cullen was making me doubt everything about myself. I don't like that feeling. I don't like lying here alone in my bed thinking about him; wishing he was here. Wondering if he would come over if I called him right now? Why did I even think that? Jesus, Bella. You just need a release, and then maybe you'll loosen up and go to sleep.
I reached over in my nightstand to get my 'substitute' for the real thing. I lay there, trying to conjure up any image at all to get me started, but my mind came back to him each time. I could practically still feel his taut muscles of his back under my fingertips as he would thrust into me. How he filled me up and knew exactly what spot to touch, to kiss. Before I knew it, I was rubbing my toy along my wet entrance, teasing myself and picturing his face and that it was him that was teasing me. Making me long for him to give in and push into me. I was moaning in no time as I rubbed my own hard nipple, and his name escaped my lips as I came.
I felt so confused now, and part of me was wondering about what really would happen if we kept it only outside of work? I shook my head as I argued with myself. I am such a terrible liar and my body and my face would give me away every time I would be in the same room with him if we were able to be together, at all. I curled up in my bed, holding my pillow tight as I really did try to fall asleep and the last thing that flashed in my mind was him, and I think it will be until I have just one more taste of him.
I got ready for work with a smug smile on my face. I knew what I needed to do, I just had to get it out of my system. That was what was wrong with me. After our recent date, I was having some pent up sexual desire for him and it was messing with my judgment. I just needed to get it over with, sleep with him again and I would be fine. I had to be.
We opted to meet at the courthouse instead of going to the office first, allowing us all more time to either sleep in or to prepare for the day. I, of course opted to sleep in after the night I had. I didn't feel any better after my self love the night before, it hadn't really filled the void within me.
"Morning, Bella. Did you sleep OK?" Edward asked as he approached, and I simply smiled.
"Amazing. You?" I think it threw him that my tone was a tad flirty.
"Um, yes, great." he replied and looked behind him as if he maybe thought I was talking to someone else after how I'd been holding back from him.
"Bree! Hey, morning!" I said as she neared where we were standing. I was anxious as hell to get this over with. I for some reason felt strange doing this in front of Edward, I wasn't sure why. He just made me feel a little self conscious, anxious even.
"Guys, I just got an urgent text from the DA to meet in Judge Victoria James' chambers." we all just looked at each other, not sure what this might mean.
"Good morning everyone. Bella, good to see you again." were the words of the DA, Peter Carlisle, who I had tried a few other cases against, and had always thought he was rather handsome.
"Your honor, the witness that had previously identified Mr. Aro in the lineup, has recanted her story." I am certain my mouth hung wide open at his words, but he continued,
"Thus, in light of us not having enough evidence at this time, we have no choice but to drop charges at this time pending further investigations into other leads." My mind couldn't wrap around what he was saying. Shit, was Laurent Aro going to be set free?
"So, our client will be released by the end of the day?" Bree asked, and the judge shook his head no.
"Wait, but if the charges are dropped, then.." and the judge raised his hand to interrupt me.
"I was going to say Ms. Swan, that he would be released tomorrow." and I nodded in understanding.
"Thank you everyone for coming.." Mr. Carlisle spoke again and he smirked at me and opened the door for me. I smiled coyly back and went out of the chambers through the courtroom, to exit with Edward and Bree behind me.
"Well, that was certainly not what I expected to happen." I looked at Bree who was just as in shock as I was. However when I glanced over at Edward, he seemed lost in his own thoughts.
"Right, Edward?" I spoke as I gently touched his forearm.
"Um, yeah me either." he said and walked ahead of us toward the courthouse steps.
"What's with him?" Bree asked and I just shook my head, and told her I have no idea.
We got back to the office and Bree went to meet with Mr. Whitlock to inform him of the outcome, and that left me alone with Edward who wouldn't make eye contact with me since we left the judge's chambers.
"OK, we're alone. So please tell me what the hell is the matter with you?" and he glanced up at me through his long lashes.
"Bella, did you fuck Peter?" I just stood there with my mouth agape.
"What? Where the hell did that come from?" I walked over to where he was sitting.
"The way he said hi, and looked at you. It seemed like something more than just an acquaintance." he muttered, making wild hand gestures.
"Are you insinuating I'm some slut that sleeps with every guy who knows my name?" I was getting flushed with my anger. Is this what he really thinks of me?
"I don't know. I don't know anything about you apparently." his tone was laced with anger as he just stood up and brushed past me to leave the office, slamming the door behind him.
I don't know what the hell happened yesterday, and Edward wouldn't speak to me all day at work for the next 2 days. It was making me so angry how he thought just because someone said hi to me and smiled at me that it was OK for him to assume the worst. I was deeply hurt that he thought so low of me, that I would be capable of something like that. Clearly I wouldn't fuck the DA as that would be 1000 times worse than sleeping with someone at the office. Talk about seriously ruining my career!
It was finally Friday night, and Bree wanted to cheer me up since she knew how tense things had been the rest of the week with Edward. She almost suggested Eternal, but we both shook her heads and laughed.
"Hell no, I don't want to see him tonight. Freaking ass hole." I muttered as we drove to a different bar to try to get out and have fun.
We walked in and found a table and waited for a server to take our drink order. I ordered two drinks to start the night as I knew I would drink them both. We had a good time laughing and talking and then my heart dropped out of my chest. I looked over just surveying the room when I met his gaze.
"Fuck. This night just gets better." and Bree followed my gaze.
"Who is he, he's hot." Bree said, but then she stopped smiling.
"Oh, I know who he is now." and I nodded. Yes, Jacob. My lovely ex. Boy, I know how to pick em.
Jake walked over toward us and I looked around for Leah, but she didn't appear to be with him. He looked good, as usual. But, I had finally put him in the past, and didn't really need this today.
"Hey, Bella. Oh my God, you look good." and he pulled me in for a very awkward hug.
"Yeah, hey Jake, this is my colleague and friend Bree." and he reached out to take her hand.
"Nice to meet you." he said, flashing her that pearly white smile, yeah the panty dropping one, he should patent it.
"So what's new, Bella? You still at the PD office?" and I nodded as I took a sip of my drink.
"What about you? How are you and Leah?" I wasn't really fishing for info on if they were still together because of any personal desire to know, it was just polite conversation.
"Nah, we broke up. But, no I'm good, going back to school. Trying to better myself and all." and I smiled. He was always worried he wasn't smart enough and so I was proud he was going to get college degree.
"That's great about school, Jake. I wish you the best with that, I really do." I smiled and then I excused myself saying I needed to go to the ladies' room. He told me bye and I went in the restroom to hide a few moments.
I sat in the stall and started to feel a little buzz from the first drink. I was going to finish the second one and then go home to bed. Oh dammit, I realized I hadn't thought about a way home, dammit. Oh well, I would worry about that when I was ready to go home. Right now, I need to finish my drink.
I drank and was feeling pretty good right now, I might go ahead and get a third. I ordered another and drank it as well, and was definitely good and tipsy and would be able to fall asleep tonight, and hopefully not think of Edward, oh who was I kidding. I think about him drunk, sober, it would hardly matter at this point. I noticed I was stumbling a bit as I walked and ran right into Jake.
"Jake! Hey! Take me home?" the words didn't mean to me what he might think. But, I just wanted to go home to sleep, and I hope I had the right frame of mind to clarify that when we got there. Right now, I just needed to sit or lie down.
"OK, Bella, stand here and I'll get my car." and he hurried off and returned before I really noticed he was gone. I sat in the car and leaned my head back on the seat and felt my eyes close as sleep took over.
EPOV
I really regret what I said to Bella. It's been weighing on my mind for the past 2 days. I should have said something to her by now, but at work didn't feel like the place. I wonder if the guys would be pissed if I cut out of here earlier than planned. I need to go talk to Bella, tell her face to face I'm sorry that I hurt her with my implications, and that no I do not think she is a slut, at all.
I opted to just go over to her apartment, knowing if I called her, we might fight and she could hang up on me and not listen. I knew if I go over there, I had a better chance to get her to hear me out before kicking me out on my ass.
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