xx not mine, not making any money xx
A/N: A huge thanks to Alf (Lisa), Mud and Haleigh for editing and support. Also, thanks soo much for everyone who took the time to write a review!! This chapter is dedicated to Tee2Green. Thanks for your support! Oh and Binky has a special thank-you planned to all who review this chapter. Silly Binky! :)
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Courting With Disaster
'It's a small world after all'
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Previously in CourtingWith Disaster
The reporter for FOX news elbowed the other reporters aside as she wormed her way up to Dougie and Mooner.
"We're here with two real life heroes who claim to be members of the Superhero team, the 'Junior Justice League'. They call themselves Freak and Super Freak." The boys puffed out their chests and stood a little taller.
"Mr. Suki Takamira, an eyewitness visiting from Japan, managed to capture the daring rescue of Foo Foo the dog with his digital recorder." Mr. Takamira kept bowing as he spoke rapidly in Japanese, waving at the cameras. "Here is that footage now—"
(Roll footage)
"There you have it, the daring rescue of FooFoo, the beloved Pekinese of Rome Thompson, daughter of owner, Jed Thomspon, of the Thompson Hotel Group."
The news reporter turned to the guys. "Well gentlemen, what's next for Freak and Super Freak?"
They looked into the camera with huge smiles, "We're going with Captain RangeMan to Disneyland!"
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Chapter Ten
On the drive to Disneyland, I sat in the front seat of the rented SUV, skimming over the pages of the RangeMan Employee Handbook, trying to get into a zone so I could block out the grumbling coming from the back seat. Binky was stuck between Mr. Schlemtsky and Grandma Mazur, who kept trying to cop feels around Binky. Hell, they were probably both trying to cop feels of Binky. No words were needed—sorry Binky—as you could tell by his expression, he was one very unhappy Mousketeer.
Behind them, Bobby and Hal were in a heated argument about the best place to pick up hot chicks at Disneyland. I couldn't believe two grown men were actually having this discussion. Bobby was adamant that Splash Mountain was the place to go for the obvious reason: wet t-shirts plastered to the fronts of young nubile specimens of the female persuasion. Geesh...did all men think like this? I rolled my eyes and then cut a look at Ranger. He wisely had his gaze fixed on the road ahead, blank expression in place. Hmmm, I tried my new ESP powers and thought I caught of glimpse of something...but then I felt a mental wall slam into place as I was pushed out of his mind. Jerk. I gave Ranger a shot to the arm just in case.
Hal argued that the Pirates of the Caribbean ride was the best place to pick up women because they would be already worked up after seeing Johnny Depp's likeness and would be 'ripe for the picking'. Ugh, where do guys come up with this stuff? Bobby disagreed and supported his original supposition with a very persuasive secondary argument; he had Hal in a headlock and was giving him a noogie while Hal was punching him repeatedly in the arm.
Tired of the bickering and fighting, Ranger turned and glared into the back seat.
"THAT'S IT! Don't make me turn this car around—," he said in a booming voice that had me feeling my seat discreetly to make sure I hadn't wet myself. The rest of the ride was spent in relative calm.
"Steph," Hal said as he leaned forward in his seat. "Whatcha reading?" He had the passing interest of a person who was trying to ignore being jabbing constantly in the ribs by the 'big kid' sitting beside him.
"The RangeMan Employee Handbook," I said, heaving it up so he could see it from the back of the SUV.
"Huh?" Hal seemed confused by my statement. "The RangeMan Employee Handbook? That's not the Handbook, Steph. That thing is frigging HUGE!"
"HAL!" Ranger turned and glared again. "Don't you have something to report from Trenton?"
Not ready to change the topic, I said, "Of course it's the Handbook Hal—Ranger gave me this copy himself." I looked to Ranger for confirmation.
"Yes Babe," Ranger said in a silky-soft voice. "It's a copy of the handbook just for you. HAL," he paused, shifting his eyes towards the rear view mirror, "is probably just not thinking straight because of the time change and he's not used to the heat. I'm sure it's nothing long hours in front of the monitors and more time reviewing the handbook can't fix." He had his 'don't fuck with me' expression on his face.
After a few moments of obvious confusion, Hal straightened in his seat and his eyes lit up.
"YES...yes...of course it's the RangeMan Employee Handbook, Steph. I don't know what I was thinking." Hal met Ranger's gaze in the rear view mirror with a slight nod of his head. "It's just the sun was in my eyes and I didn't see it clearly... and I'm all the way in the back here."
Hal seemed like he was trying a little too hard. "R-R-Ranger?" I bit my lower lip not feeling as confident as before.
Ranger continued in a soothing tone, "Babe, we can get a funnel cake when we get there. You'd like a funnel cake wouldn't you?" His voice was almost hypnotic as he reached over and took my hand in his, stroking it.
"Funnel cake? Mmmmm, so good..." I trailed off mesmerized by the small, gentle circles his thumb was tracing on the back of my hand. My mind was fuzzy.
"Um...Ranger, wh-what were we talking about?"
"Funnel cakes, Babe."
"Oh," I relaxed in my seat and smiled. "Okay then."
If I had been more aware of my surroundings, I would've seen that Ranger, satisfied with my reply, blew out a huge breath he'd been holding. I also would have seen a look on his face like he'd just dodged a bullet and would have further noticed that Hal sported the exact same expression.
Instead, I'd already returned my attention back to reading the 'The Book' while I thought about a golden brown, perfectly fried funnel cake, smothered in vanilla ice cream, whipped cream and drenched in fresh strawberries. Mmmmm...
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Once inside the park at Disneyland, it was decided that it would be too hard for us to all stay together, so we broke off into two smaller groups, each going in a different direction with the promise to meet up at Cinderella's Enchanted Castle for supper. Ranger, Grandma Mazur, Mr. Schlemtsky, Hal and Binky rounded out our group. I think Hal and Binky thought their best hope for seeing some 'real action' and getting some 'air time' was with me and Grandma Mazur.
Hal had actually come right out and said, "I want to be in Steph and her granny's group. That's my best chance of seeing some real action and getting some air time." Hal had said exactly what was on Binky's mind, so all Binky could do was sadly nod his head in agreement.
We made the requisite stop at the Funnel Cake booth, just as Ranger had promised. While we ate—well everyone but Ranger ate—we discussed where to go next. It was decided that we would see 'Aladdin –A Musical Spectacular', so the Disney Guidebook said. Since we had just polished off that huge treat, no one felt like going on a roller coaster just yet to experience the funnel cake for a second, more unpleasant time around. Besides, with my luck I would be the fortunate recipient of any 'fallout' from fellow riders. And the moment it happened, it would be captured by the ride cameras and displayed for all to see. Gee, do you think I'm a glass half-empty kinda girl?
After watching the amazing show, we agreed that we would each choose one ride for our group to go on. Ranger wanted to chart out the best course to attack this mission, meeting the objectives with efficiency and expediency. Ranger, Binky and Hal put their heads together in a tight tactical huddle.
They pulled out a map of the park and started marking it up taking into account factors such as ride location, ride popularity, projected wait times and time of day. They discussed the strategy of sending a runner to secure Fastpasses for the group, then discussed the best person for the job, debating the advantages of a sprinter versus a distance runner. I just rolled my eyes. Ranger even included estimates of the time it would take to 'deploy the troops' between rides and noted the location of latrines and ration depots to finally compute the optimal sequence of rides.
Once a course was charted, Ranger turned to his men.
"Saddle up. Lock and load," he said with determination.
They answered with a battle cry meant to rally the troops. I rolled my eyes...again. Only Ranger could turn a trip to Disneyland into a covert military operation.
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OH. MY. GOD! We had such a blast! I couldn't decide which ride I liked best; they were all so much fun! We went on Big Thunder Mountain Railway, Indiana Jones, the Tower of Terror, Splash Mountain, Pirates of the Caribbean and Fantasmic—surprisingly Binky's choice.
Who knew Binky was a closet musical-junkie. I snorted at the vision of him in the shower belting out songs from different musicals like 'OOO-kla-homa, where the wind comes whipping down the lane...' Funny, I couldn't really imagine what his singing voice would sound like. Hell, I was having a hard time remembering what his real voice sounded like.
Finally, it was my choice of a ride and this was where our day started to go downhill. My whole family had gone to Disneyland when I was small. I had always loved the ride, 'It's a Small World' and although there were so many more exciting rides we could go on, this one held a kind of nostalgic attraction to me.
Ranger, the big bad-ass bounty hunter in black, had been a good sport about the entire day. He sweetly held my hand or tucked an arm around my waist and went on every ride without a single grumble...that is, until we reached 'the ride from hell'. Huh. Those words just popped into my head. I looked at Ranger confused.
"Babe," he planted his feet on the pavement. "There's no way in hell you're going to get me to go on that ride." His voice almost had a hint of panic and I thought for a second that I saw fear flash in his eyes for the briefest moment. Wow! Ranger was afraid of a little kiddie ride?
"Babe..." he warned. The link between us through my ring must not have been at full strength yet. If it had been, I would have discovered that when Ranger was a child he'd also visited Disneyland and had gone on this ride with his siblings. Unfortunately, there was a malfunction and Ranger and his brothers and sisters were stuck on the ride. Ranger's older brothers teased him unmercifully, convincing him that the robotic children were real and would jump into the boat at any moment to devour him. Young Ranger had nightmares for years about this ride.
"Okay Ranger." He was abviously uncomfortable so I relented without a lot of fuss. "Why don't you wait here with the guys and I'll go with Grandma on this ride?" I could almost feel Ranger sigh in relief and the gratitude in his eyes told me that he loved me.
"I know." I leaned up and gave him a quick kiss on his lips before I linked arms with Grandma and we skipped off to the waiting line. I waved at Ranger and the guys as we joined the end of the line.
As I watched them leave, I saw Binky stop suddenly and turn back around. He started waving his arms and began yelling something but I couldn't hear what he was trying to say. It was hard to hear over the adorable music that was being piped through speakers hidden along the waiting line. Hal continued to pull Binky along, but again, he tried to yell something. It seemed like every time Binky attempted to speak, the music coming from the speakers increased in volume just enough to drown out his voice. Huh. Well, whatever it was, I'm sure it wasn't so important that it couldn't wait until after the ride was over. I mean it's not like he was trying to warn me about some immediate impending disaster that awaited us, right? I snorted. Yeah, oooh, watch out for the, ohhh so dangerous, kiddie ride on boats that travelled slower than I could walk. I giggled...
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(Cue music It's a Small World sung by children)
The waiting line for the ride, It's a Small World, was ridiculously long. I didn't mind the wait so much since I had already spent half of the day standing in lines for rides that lasted under three minutes. I was a little surprised though, that the people in the waiting line weren't more friendly. When I noticed people looking my way, I would give them a small smile, maybe a little finger wave, but they returned my overtures of friendliness with glares and scowls. What the hell? Not the reaction I would have expected from people waiting in line for the happiest ride in the park. My confusion continued for the next half an hour until I happened to catch a glimpse of Grandma Mazur shoot a tiny candy through her straw, using it like a blow gun. It beaned an unsuspecting gentleman two turns of the waiting line ahead. When he looked around to see who was responsible, I saw Grandma pointing to me and mouth 'She did it'.
Aargh! I don't know what I was thinking going on a ride alone with Grandma Mazur. After I took her straw away—I actually tried to rip it in half but it was made of plastic so I had to satisfy myself with scrunching it up, stamping on it and throwing it in the nearest garbage—I made sure my eyes never left her after that. For good measure I opened my purse, discreetly withdrew the handle of my stun gun so Grandma could see it and made a "Zzzztt" noise. I think we understood each other after that.
An hour later we still standing in the frigging waiting line and my 'happy place' was almost gone. When it was finally our turn to get on the ride I was determined to get back in the mood. I was going to enjoy this ride, damn it, even if it killed me...
What?
(Cue ominous music again...but it is drowned out by the cheery children's rendition of It's a Small World.)
TBC