CSI: Crime Scene Investigation

Fallen Butterfly

Chapter Ten- So Long Goodbye

Grissom held back the tears as he begun to read the hastily scrawled note;

Gil

I'm so sorry. I'm only writing this because…I know I can't get out of my situation alive. I know I won't, Lurie wouldn't give me a chance to. He guards me like a hawk, I can see his shadow under the door every waking moment. And every time I see it I think of you. I guess that's why I'm still alive. I just wanted you to know Gil that I am so, so sorry for upsetting you so much over the last couple of years. If I could have asked for anything besides your love, it would be your forgiveness. I guess we both haven't been on friendly terms, but everybody fights.

Please…tell Catherine and the guys I love them, and they've been like a second family to me since I came to Vegas. Thank them for me; tell them that I wouldn't have traded their friendship for anything, and I'll never forget them.

But please Gil don't have any regrets, because I don't. Over the short amount of years you and I have known each other; it's felt like an eternity. And I'm sorry none of us got to make a move. As I said I have no regrets, except that I will never see you again and have you hold me. I wish we could have had more time together, to do so many things. But time has run out and you need to know…I love you. I just wish I could have told you in person. In a way I guess I have tried, but I gave up when I couldn't get through to you. I'm so sorry…for everything. I will always be with you, and you will always have my heart Gil Grissom. Please don't feel bad. Some things were just never meant to be…

But when I'm gone and if you ever feel alone, look up to the sky and you will see me. Remember? Because I am a Fallen Butterfly, and one day I will return. I hope one day you will be able to forgive me…

Goodbye Gil

Sara

Grissom's hands were shaking as he read the last line. In that single moment something dawned on him, which he had never noticed before. He loved her…he loved Sara Sidle. So much in fact that he felt like his heart was going to melt. And for once in his life he didn't feel afraid to admit it. He would tell the whole world if he could, he didn't care anymore. He didn't care if there was no scientific explanation; all he knew was what he was feeling. All he wanted was her, to be with her, to listen to her, to talk to her, to laugh with her, to kiss her, and to hold her.

He held the blood stained letter in his hands, and felt for the first time in his life that he had somebody worth fighting for. Of course he'd had these feeling's before, but it seemed they had surfaced from a somewhat dark cave in his emotions. He wasn't going to screw his life up, anymore.

"Grissom?" Brass asked softly. He had been watching his friends face as he read the letter, and it didnt look good. Brass had never seen so many emotional play across the mans face, in all the time he'd known him.

"I'm fine Jim" Grissom said. He vowed he was going to find her…

They had been driving for what seemed like hours in Sara's opinion. Up and up they traveled, past the countless trees and other wildlife covered in snow. Sara felt like she had left the world, and gone to an isolated planet with only Lurie for company. They saw nobody and hardly the slightest sign of life. Lurie had the air conditioning on, and for this Sara was thankful. It was getting too cold outside; the trees were frozen over with a slick layer of ice. He sometimes tried to catch a radio station, but from this distance it was hopeless. So Lurie really had no way of knowing if the police were really at his house, which Sara could see made him frustrated.

When the car finally halted with a heart lurching swerve off the road, Sara's eyes flew open. Her vision was instantly pulled towards the foggy window, she could just make out the faint outline of a small pathway leading into the forest. Before she could even register this Lurie was out of the car, slamming his door shut and with amazing speed standing by Sara's door. He opened the door and pulled Sara out of his car by the hair; roughly yanking her to her feet so she was against the car. For the first time upon entering Luire's vechile, Sara realized its model. It was a shiny black convertible, with the roof drawn up.

'That would have cost a lot of money' Sara thought numbly.

"Come on" Lurie said pulling her forward. Sara clenched her teeth at the pain which shot through her right leg. So Lurie practically had to drag her down that small path she had spotted. Just a few meters from where the car was parked, he halted. And Sara finally saw her next residence, as he pointed out two new structures. A small shed was assembled next to an even smaller shack, in a clearing closed in on all sides by trees.

"See Debbie. I keep the motorbike in there, like I always used to" Lurie explained pointing to the shed, "Remember when we ran out of petrol one time as we came up here for a trip. And so I put the motorbike in this shed where nobody would find it, to make sure it wouldn't happen again? Remember Debbie?"

Sara grunted in response, to tired to fight with him. She needed to conserve her energy, if she had any hope of making it through the next hour. The bleeding on her various body parts had lessened, but the blood still oozed out slowly, like a reminder death was only a few steps away.

"I'm going back to the house to see if the police are still there" Lurie muttered as he flung open the shack door, "If they are we'll wait out here and try to get out of these mountains. The maybe take a plane to somewhere where they won't ever find us again."

Sara's heart sunk, she really didn't like the sound of that. She remembered something Catherine once told her;

'It's best to go down before they take you away' she had shrugged, 'When someone's kidnapped for example, it's best to die on the way to the kidnappers destination. Because if they get you where they want you, where nobody can help you, they can do anything to you, torture for instance.'

Die trying, that was the 'motto' of that story, or so Catherine had said.

"I'm sorry Debbie but I can't risk you getting away" Lurie whispered softly. It was at that moment that Sara knew she was going to die anyway, even without her trying. All she could do was hang on inside her soul, as something hard made contact with her head, not quite blacking out her world forever…

A/N: Sorry for the late update! My internet was playing up. The funny thing is I was listening to the song 'So Long Goodbye' by Sum 41 when I named this chapter. The song actually relates to this story quite a bit, I didn't realize that until this chapter. Well, thanks for the reviews! They're great! The next chapter will be along sooner than this one, I'm lmost done writing it anyway. Tell me what you think!

Apparently Sara Sidle is coming back to CSI in season 9!? Is this true!? And man that new CSI chick is gonna suck, they should bring back Warrick!

Sarah