After the Quake

Mikoto couldn't keep his thoughts away from Reishi's kiss. He dreamt about holding the man and kissing him, but it couldn't compare to the real thing. Even if his dream seemed so real, the kiss they shared (the real one) felt 10 times more. He turned on the bed, still thinking about the kiss. He closed his eyes, thinking how surreal that moment was. It was like he was being played by his own mind. His desires manifested themselves on those images trapping him inside a delusion. Here he was killing himself whether the kiss was real or not. His thoughts drifted off to Reishi's reaction. He forgot. It was like the intimacy that they shared didn't happen at all.

Munakata.

He didn't expect the real thing to feel that good. He wanted to forget all about it, just like how the other man forgot, but then the blazing passion just from when their lips pressed against each other was so strong and captivating that he couldn't. The burning feeling when their tongues met, and the way Reishi pulled him close, the man's body language telling him how much he wanted him. How could he ever forget all of that? With his flustered face and aroused body, he bewitched Mikoto. Everything about him at that time was erotic. It enticed Mikoto more than anything else, more than even his dreams would allow.

Just thinking about that time made him crave for him. It didn't matter if this was the first time he ever felt this way, the only thing that matters is the fact that he wanted to press himself against him and be one with him. He didn't even know why he was thinking about it, Reishi was drunk after all. Yet no matter how much he rationalize his actions, he still ends up getting angry. Getting angry at the fact that the sensation that he's feeling right now looms to nothing but obscure reality. That it couldn't even fit into what's real or what not.

Mikoto had been restraining himself, and because of this, his mood keeps on getting worse and worse. He keeps on getting into trouble and oversleeps more than ever before. Reishi was getting worried but he was powerless (because it was partly his fault) and Mikoto was even colder compared to when they first met. This made him anxious, he didn't know what to do. He keeps on telling himself that maybe it was just his imagination. His classmates seemed to not notice the other man's worsening mood everyday.

Before first period, their homeroom teacher asked one of the students to tell Mikoto to go to the faculty room. Reishi was there so he volunteered.

Tch, who else could find that guy but me. I might as well be the one to fetch him.

The sound of Reishi's footsteps reverberated onto the stair wall. The pitter patter of his steps made him anxious. He clenched his fists.

Where else could he be but here.

When he reached the last step of the staircase, he dashed towards the entrance and clicked the door open. His heart was pounding, for some reason he had this aching feeling that made him long to see Mikoto's face. He felt as if it was long ago since he saw him and heard his voice. He missed him. When he was inside, he looked around and saw him. He was sleeping.

The only time Mikoto looks like a tamed animal is whenever he's asleep. His back was against the contraption that shielded him from the rays of the sun. He was leaning on his left arm, and his left leg served as support. His red hair was swaying with the wind. Reishi was stunned, this was the first time he saw Mikoto asleep. The sound of the birds seemed to drown the siren of cars that were passing, singing a lullaby that only Mikoto could hear. Looking at him seemed like another dimension, it felt like it was from another world. He thought that the rain complimented him perfectly, but then the light of the sun striking his skin, illuminating him made him seem so beautiful that it made Reishi forget all of his worries. He felt calm and relaxed. He wanted to rush to him and envelope him in his arms. His usual stern face and cool demeanor turned into a look of adoration. Genuine adoration that he wasn't even aware himself. He looked like he was home, like this was the place where he wanted to be.

He sighed, and smile a painful smile. He walked towards him and sat down beside him. He leaned his back against the contraption to get a better view. It was comfortable, seeing him like this. So comfortable that he forgot about everything that he'd done just to forget about the man before him. He felt defeated just by looking at the other man's face. Mikoto didn't move one bit, he just stayed like that, his chest heaving up and down.

He reached out his hand but then he stopped it in midair. He couldn't let himself do unreasonable things. He was trying to forget about him, but then he couldn't easily throw away his feelings. This made his throat burn. He felt frustration welled up inside him. He looked away and took out his cellphone from his pocket. Adjusting it just a healthy distance from Mikoto. He was adjusting his viewfinder, the lines and the focus capturing the edges and contours of Mikoto's upper body. His head on his left arm, his bent neck, and his serene sleeping face were all precious to Reishi. This made his heart ache, knowing that the both of them are separated by an invisible barrier of some sort, preventing them from being together. He realized how much he liked him, and how much he wanted to snuggle close to him. The snap of the camera brought him back to his senses.

Reishi felt relieved. He held his phone close to him and breathed deeply.

Now what's left is to wake him up.

He brushed his hand into Mikoto's face lovingly, spreading his fingers gently through his hair and clutching it forcefully. He pushed his head towards the protruding block. Mikoto's eyes slowly opened. He felt his head.

"Did you just knocked my head against the block?"

"Our homeroom teacher told me to tell you to go to the faculty room." Reishi said with a stern voice.

Mikoto scratched his head defiantly. He was too lazy to get up but he had no other choice. He grunted as he was forcing himself to stand up. But then he remembered something.

"Say Munakata…."

Reishi was surprised at this.

"Ah nevermind."

Mikoto walked away leaving Reishi alone in the rooftop. Then tension between them was distinct, Mikoto was holding himself back. While Reishi was letting Mikoto drift away from him.

When he passed by him, the wind seemed stronger. It felt as if the wind took something away from him. Reishi fixed his glasses and looked disappointed. He creased his eyebrows in a furrow, looking despondent. He thought that these complicated feelings he bottles up inside are more tricky than solving his puzzles. And the feeling of losing Mikoto, or the thought of him drifting away was worse than losing a puzzle piece. The usual distance that they keep would usually suffice but then, the more he notice how they've grown closer, the more he's afraid that one day he will lose everything.

Reishi is the type of guy who wants everything to go into plan. He clenched his fist as Mikoto's footsteps reached it's final cadence. Mikoto was just the only puzzle he couldn't solve. Those eyes that doesn't reveal anything, and his stoic face that would time to time smile. Reishi couldn't link them all, he couldn't predict all of them. He's the only one like that in Reishi's life.

"It's fine right?"

"What's fine?"

"I'm not going home with you like always. You seem to move so slow these past few days. You keep on making me wait."

"Ah. I see. Then you can go home ahead of me."

Izumo and Mikoto was talking on the hallway when Reishi entered the classroom and walked past them.

"Ne Mikoto."

"Hmm?"

"That guy sometimes reminds me of you."

Mikoto didn't reply, he just looked straight at Izumo.

"Oh, it's time already. See you tomorrow then!"

Mikoto entered the classroom, they didn't have a class in their last period so he decided to stay a bit. One by one, their classmates went home, leaving him the only one in the classroom. Reishi wasn't there as well.

He was leaning against the window drinking his fruit juice. Overviewing the student down below going on their separate ways. Reishi and his fellow student council officers were having a meeting for the school festival. After discussing things, the other members left ahead of him. He sat on his desk, looking at his phone. He was never fond of phones to begin with, but the reason he was clutching it tightly in his hand now and looking at it adoringly was because he was looking at Mikoto's picture.

Reishi smiled sweetly as he gazed at the picture of the man sleeping.

The afternoon sun bathed the panorama with it's copper wire lit rays. Mikoto was there in the classroom leaning on the windowsill, restraining himself not to go to the student council office. They were both waiting for something that would happen, but for some reason they were both afraid to do anything about it. Mikoto heard noises down below, when he gazed outside, he saw Reishi walking with a girl. He just look at them straight, his mouth slightly open. He wasn't angry nor was he disturbed but he could feel the emptiness in him like a black hole pulling everything into the void.

"Mikoto! You're still here."

"Izumo. I thought you already gone home."

"You actually thought I'm going to leave without you?"

"Izumo."

"Yes Mikoto?"

"How does it feel to be with someone?"

Izumo was surprised at Mikoto's sudden question when they were walking home. He was taken aback, he didn't expect him to think about those kinds of things. Without thinking he burst into laughter. The other man beside him was pissed off, he hit Izumo making the man convulse in pain.

"What the hell did you just do?"

Mikoto didn't reply, he just looked as stern as always. The look on his face didn't seem to mirror what he just asked earlier.

"Well, I don't know. My relationships don't really last that long right? But I guess, it kinda feels refreshing feeling the warmth of somebody else. Why do you ask?"

"Ah, I see."

"Do you feel cold or something? Do you want me to warm you up?"

Mkoto glared at Izumo. Making the man jolt in fear.

"You never change. I was just joking you know!"

I just had this feeling of wanting to be with someone. Mikoto wanted to say but he stopped himself in time. For some reason, he keeps on thinking about those stupid things and he was afraid that Izumo might think he's already gone soft or something like that. It was the first for him after all. Izumo asked him if he was preoccupied with something. He shrugged him off and told him if they could drop by his uncle's bar. The other man seemed to gleam with delight when he heard it. It was rare for Mikoto to actually ask him out. He teased him a bit.

"Don't worry Mikoto, I'll find you some nice girl, and let's have you try once. Someone like Kushina-sense perhaps?"

Mikoto said nothing. They walked in silence and when they reached the bar. Izumo suggested they should find another place if Mikoto wanted to try something fun with someone. Mikoto was quiet all through out and he didn't resist. Izumo began to worry, he was never like this.

"What's the matter Mikoto? Did something happen?"

"Hmm."

Mikoto seemed to be thinking deeply so Izumo didn't bother him. He was curious. What could be the reason Mikoto suddenly asked him about stuff he used to not care about? Was he perhaps in love? Nah, that was impossible. Izumo snapped out of his reverie.

"We're here."

Mikoto didn't let him finish and just walked towards the entrance. The glittering lights of the bar seemed to irritate his eyes. Compared to Izumo's bar, he was not comfortable at this new place. The sound of the people inside seemed to irritate him. When they settled themselves on the high chair, they were welcomed by an array of drinks that he's never seen before. He took out his cigarette and smoke for a bit. Izumo noticed that some of the girls were eyeing them, giggling amongst themselves. He smiled at them.

"What do you want to drink Mikoto?"

"Bourbon."

"Two Bourbons please."

"Understood."

The clinking of the glasses, the whispers, and the laughters of the people inside of the bar seemed hollow in Mikoto's ears. He was looking at his drink, watching the dim lights flicker behind him and watching his reflection on his glass. He drank it, and turned to Izumo. The man was ordering something for the girls across the two of them. He closed his eyes and concentrated on his drink. He was starting to feel dizzy. He smoked, letting the smoke penetrate his system as if making his heart numb. He felt the coolness of the smoke envelope his heart like a membrane. It felt good. The sensation in his lips was even more pleasant. He liked this feeling, but then he remembered the kiss that he shared with Reishi. His downcast eyes looking at nothing in particular seemed to be irresolute. The menthol from his cigarette and the hotness of Reishi's kiss seemed to merge. He closed his eyes.

Izumo observed him. He couldn't explain what he was seeing. The other man seemed to be preoccupied with something. So he decided to call on for the girls to sit closer to them. One of the girls were flirting with him, but all he could respond was no longer than two words. Then he remembered. He was curious about something. He whispered to the girl and smiled a little. Even if Mikoto looked like he was always brooding, he was still charming. The girl blushed. Izumo was amused at this. He chuckled.

"He's learning."

I wonder how it would feel to.. kiss someone… other than...

"Munakata-san. Thank you for today."

"No problem. I'm glad to help."

Reishi caught a glimpse of Mikoto on the other block. He saw him with Izumo, they entered a shop that looked like a bar. The man's hands were inside his pockets, and he seemed to be looking stoic as always. Izumo was talking to him about something. He felt his heart ache. He tried to reason out with himself. It was no use feeling jealous, he doesn't have the right and that he was the one who keeps on pushing the man away. He was the one who wanted to avoid him at all costs. He was the one who was selfish, this was the right punishment for him. He smiled a little and decided to take a peak. He sighed, he knew what was coming.

And in the end, I would completely lose that puzzle piece I really wanted to find.

Reishi was standing outside the bar, scrutinizing it. He could smell the stench of alcohol mixed with cigarettes and perfume. This was his first time at that kind of place. He was hesitant on coming inside. He was afraid of what he was about to see.

I guess, it's better If I don't go inside. I'll just be in the way.

Reishi fixed his glasses and walked away with his usual cool and confident demeanor. His true feelings hidden away.

Izumo at the corner of his eyes saw Reishi's figure. He was standing in front of the bar, looking at it. He saw the expression on the man's face as he walked away. He looked pained.

What the hell?

Izumo wanted to tell Mikoto about what he saw, but thought better of it.

To be continued...

A/N: Apparently I wrote this just to justify Reishi. At the beginning of the story I seem to be focused on his perspective but for some reason, I seemed to becoming fond of Mikoto's and Reishi turned out to be a jerk or something. Well, I guess both of them just have different styles of showing their love so it can't be helped. :D

I had a hard time deciding what to right since I had a lot of thought on my mind, I originally wanted them to be together in the next chapter, but I guess I still need to justify Reishi, yeah and as you may have noticed. I prefer it slow. :D

There are two part of this story. The first part is supposed to be Reishi's reprieve and the other avoidance. They are originally two separate stories, and I later decided to merge them both. While I was writing the second part for some reason I felt heavy. -.- I might have gotten carried away while I was writing this or something like that. I hope you appreciate the internal conflict I'm putting right here, hmm. it's not awkward or out of place, right? I think I owe you guys some hot Lemons. -.-

The title came out of a whim. If it doesn't make any sense, I apologize. XD