Before returning to the drawing room Snape administered his carefully titrated dilation potion and then cast an illusionary charm of his design on his genitals. The charm would make him appear to have a raging hard on while in reality his member would be retracted into his body at the idea of forcing an egg into the Dark Lord's scaly arse. Ten points to Snape, he thought cynically as he descended upon the drawing room.
The drawing room air was repulsively moist and thick with the smell of lust potions. Snape tried to assume a domineering stride to the Dark Lord but the oily marble floor cramped his style.
"Severus," regarded Voldemort intensely and the room instantly fell silent.
"My Lord," Snape responded accordingly as he felt every eye in the room shift to him.
"You have brought me an intriguing gift tonight. You may commence tonight's revel," said Voldemort seriously.
Snape hesitated as he began walking towards the Dark Lord. He had never initiated a revel and he was not sure what was required of him. As he approached Voldemort a circle of Death Eater's encased them and disrobed. Lucius kneeled at Voldemort's feet presenting him with a goblet of massage oil.
"Disrobe me Severus," beckoned Voldemort in what was evidently meant to be a sultry tone.
With one final internal prayer for his eyes and body to survive the night, Snape expertly removed Voldemort's robes without touching his skin. As his robes fell to the floor Voldemort turned away from Snape and bent over. After a few seconds in which Snape did nothing but mentally gape at the literal snake where Voldemort's penis should have been, Voldemort gave an inpatient hiss. He cast the image out of his head until he could deal with it at a later more sane time. Snape then turned to Lucius who was smirking arrogantly and holding the goblet towards him.
Snape dipped his fingers into the goblet, and then with better judgement, coated his knuckles and wrists too. I only intend to do this once, so I need to do it right, said Snape to himself in reassurance.
With his dominant hand, Snape entered Voldemort's surprisingly taut and puckered anus with his finger. Oh Merlin, what was I thinking, this is never going to fit, thought Snape frantically as he felt the weight of the egg in his other hand. Working his oily fingers into Voldemort he stretched the scaly tissue feverishly until he was able to fit his entire fist into the cavity. He then withdrew his fist with an audible pop and levelled the egg with Voldemort's ass. Using both hands, Snape began pushing the narrowest portion of the egg onwards until he met resistance. Using his feet for leverage, Snape found himself sliding across the slick floor with the effort of advancing the egg. He was beginning to work up a sweat and was motivated only by the faint moaning and hissing sounds Voldemort was making. The egg had reached the halfway point and was not budging. Desperately, Snape wound up his hand and punched the butt of the egg with force. With a vacuum-like sucking noise, Voldemort's ass completely engulfed the egg and Voldemort cried out in ecstasy.
Voldemort dropped to the ground and began wriggling like a snake. Snape instinctively tried to take a step back, hoping to escape unnoticed, but the circle of Death Eater's had tightened forcing him to remain at Voldemort's side. As he searched for a weak point in the circle, a foot kicked him squarely in the back sending him to the ground. He looked up to find the face of Lucius who raised an eyebrow and smiled arrogantly. Snape's thoughts of homicide quickly evaporated at the heinous sound of Voldemort straining to expel the egg and the accompanying encouragements from the surrounding circle. With no other choice, Snape crouched down behind Voldemort preparing to play the part of a twisted midwife in the birth of a syphilis ridden sex toy.
The egg was crowning but not making any other progress. Desperate for the night to end, Snape cast a wandless spell forcing the smooth muscles of Voldemort's anus to rhythmically contract. Preparing himself to catch the egg, Snape awkwardly squatted with his arms outstretched. With one final push, the egg rocketed out of Voldemort's ass with such velocity that Snape was forced to raise his arms high in the air in order to catch it.
Snape stood speechless with the egg held high above his head in apparent triumph. The Death Eater's began to cheer and tend to Voldemort who had collapsed to the ground in exhaustion and pleasure. Snape took that moment to shrink the egg and place it in a tiny pouch Dumbledore had stitched into his harness for safe keeping. Before leaving the manor, Snape located Lucius and lovingly ran his oily, faintly bloody, and feces tinged fingers through his blond locks.
"Always a pleasure Lucius," Snape regarded as the blond recoiled in disgust. Finally giving himself a moment to celebrate his success, Snape pressed a light hearted kiss against Lucius' scowling mouth.
"Great show Severus," Lucius responded through gritted teeth.