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Chapter 10: Wednesday's Child is Full of Woe
Spoilers: Deep Throat, Traingle.
Ten days later ...
Wednesday 30th October
18:04
"and then Deniz - no wait, it was Chloe", Yvo corrects, and I wonder how he can get his best friend mixed up with a girl. Driving back home, the twins have been on a nursery trip to Reston Zoo. They were so excited this morning, that they woke me up a little after five, jumping up and down on my bed.
" - and then we", Yvo continues over the steady patter of raIn against the windows and the steady sounds of Theodore's regular late afternoon whimpers. To think that most baby's fall asleep during car journeys, mine takes it as an opportunity to let everyone hear how terribly awful it is to be waited on hand and foot and to be played with all day- wait - did I just call Theodore mine?
" - and then we", Yvo repeats, dragging out the last word, I raise my eyebrows knowing that he has forgotten what he was going to say. " - uhmmm ... I can't remember", he giggles and I chuckle, glancing over to his sister as his slip hasn't triggered her usual less that salubrious comment that normally results in her earning time on the naughty step.
But she is silent.
She has been silent since I picked her up from nursery. The care workers had said she had been in a foul mood most of he trip, and when they approached her about it, she just completely ignored them. They said she wouldn't even interact with the animals, instead trailed behind her brother like a black cloud. Well, I know how that feels like to witness ... still something must have upset her. I have an idea what. My eyebrows furrow worryingly as I study her reflection through the front mirror. It's dark and raining outside, the weather also dropping in temperature in preparation for the winter months, but she seems fascinated by the scenery passing by.
~xXx~
20:13
Closing the door on the twins' bedroom, I rest my hand on the solid oak and sigh. I hadn't got Xoë to open up, like the care workers she stayed silent during my attempts of broaching the subject, and I have to say it has got me more than upset that I cannot still get through to her; that in terms of trust, she puts me on par with her nursery care workers. I hardly got her to eat more than few spoonfuls of her dinner either, and even then that was Yvo jokely aeroplaning it into her mouth; by the small smile on her face, I think she was just indulging him. She went straight to bed after that. When I asked Yvo about it, he said that she had just suddenly gotten very sad.
She will be at home tomorrow, Yvo too as it is Halloween, and I have to say that I am glad that it is not just me, her and the baby. That Yvo will be here to keep both our moods up.
Sighing again, I make my way to my own bedroom. I now move Theodore's cot into my room in the week, for the purely selfish reason that I don't have to walk as far for his nightly feeds. I can feed him from the comfort of my own bed. On more than one occasion however, I have woken up to find we have both fallen asleep whilst comforted by the sheets, him in my arms, my naked breast inches from his mouth.
I find Theodore is wide awake, actively wiggling around in his crib, but I know that after he has had his fill of his bottle and we have had a little cuddle, he will be out for the count for the next four hours or so. Last Tuesday he actually slept the night through, but that has since been a one hit wonder.
It has also become routine these past few weeks that after feeding him, I let him play with my breast until he falls asleep, as horrifyingly strange as it sounds the suckling seems to lull him into a deeper sleep, and we both have a better night and morning because of it. It is our secret though, if anyone were to find out I would die of mortification, especially Dr Mulder ...
~xXx~
The slam of the front door, sharply awakens me from my nap. I realise I have again fallen asleep with Theodore still in my arms, luckily my jolt has not woken him up. I still my breathing. Although I am not expecting him, I presume it's Dr Mulder, it is his house after all and is free to come and go as he likes without consulting me.
... But I can't hear any movement downstairs.
Curiosity rising in me, I fix my vest top back in place, resting Theodore in his crib next to my bed.
"Hello", I call from the landing, but no one replies.
I can hear a steady banging, and crouch down to find it's the front door, ajar, the wind knocking it against the lock latch.
I frown.
That surely couldn't have been open all day - in fact, I don't know when the last time it was used, seeing we all use the side door in the utility that leads us straight to the tank.
I suddenly notice a high dining room chair, positioned near the front door, and I know exactly what has happened.
I dismiss even checking to confirm my inkling.
Hurriedly scrambling off the wooden landing floor, I race down the stairs, across that hall, the front door flying open, the dining room chair crashing loudly on the ground, I flee into the night.
"Xoë!" I scream, once outside.
The rain is pouring down even heavier. Dressed in just my thin bed clothes, the harsh wind dampens them instantly.
It doesn't phase me though.
"Xoë!" I scream again, running further out into the tormid weather. "Xoë!"
The rain has plastered my hair to my face, my body deathly cold, but it's not because of the weather.
Fear.
Fear because I can't see Xoë anywhere, I can't see more than a few yards in front of me. The porch light not doing much to help.
Why did it take me so long to click?!
I search and feel around the dotted bushes along the pathway to see if she is hiding behind them.
"Xoë!"
"Xoë! Please!" I cry.
Stumbling down the front drive to where it merges with the cul de sac, I scream her name out into the darkness again.
I can't see anything.
I should have brought a torch.
I cry out again helplessly.
"Dana!"
I whip around to look down the darkened cul de sac from where my voice was called.
Ed?
"Ed?!"
"It's OK ... I've got her".
...
22:07
We had brought Xoë inside immediately, she had her nursery back pack on and despite her rain jacket, was soaked through to the bone. When I had asked her why, she said that she wanted her mother and was going to find her.
Dried, changed into warm clothes, fed, and put into my bed after a hot drink of cocoa. She didn't put much of a fight when I directed her into my bed; I think she knew it was better not to argue and this way I could keep an eye on her until we talked properly about why she ran away.
I close the door of my bedroom, and go to find Ed who I left downstairs. He has been keeping an eye on one of the neighbour's houses while they have been away, feeding the dogs, and said he was just locking up when he spotted Xoë's torch light down the cul de sac. I find him inspecting a painting in the hall. He turns though when he hears my footsteps coming down the staircase, and smiles.
"Van Gogh", he says, over the painting.
Reaching the bottom step, I nod timidly. "I think it's the original", I croak, my voice omitting exactly what I feel, worn.
Ed nods, looking over the grandeur of the hall and landing. "W'ud'nt saprise me".
His eyes rest back on me.
"She's in bed", I say, my hands twiddling.
He nods. There is a few metre distance between us and he walks over to close it, "and you?"
"... I'm uh ... ", I look away from him, blinking away tears, until fail and burst out crying.
"Hey, hey, hey", he soothes, enclosing me in his embrace, and I welcome the comfort. "She's OK, der's not'in to worry abou'".
"Oh but there is", I say, pulling away, "what if you hadn't been there? ... I don't think I would have found her .. she doesn't ...", I pause, my eyes stinging from tears, I focus on the leg of one of the hall cabinets, "she just doesn't trust me. I don't know if, if this is... ", I let out a sigh before resting my eyes on Ed's caring large blue ones, "how can me being here ever work if she doesn't trust me?"
"She does trust you", he implores resting his hands on my shoulders. "I've seen you with her, and she does".
I don't believe it though. Besides he has probably only seen me with her about two percent of the time that I actually spend with her.
"Hey", he cups my chin with one of his hands and brings my watery gaze up to his. "You're doing a grand job wit' t'ese kids", his thumb soothes the side of my face and I instinctively lean into it.
I close my eyes and let my collecting tears fall, when I oped them again, I find that Ed's face is centimetres away from mine. He leans in and places a kiss on my lips.
I respond, bringing my hands up to cup his face and deepen our kiss, before pulling back sharply.
"I uh, sorry", I say embarrassed, putting a few steps between us.
He doesn't attempt to close the gap, so I guess, it was also a mistake for him.
"Thanks again for your help", I say clearing my voice and walking towards the front door to let him out. "I need to call Dr Mulder and tell him all about all of this", I chuckle softly and then stop, my eyes largening, "not our ki - Xoë ...", my eyes eventually resting back in him.
He hasn't moved from the spot where we kissed yet, but he has turned to face me. He shrugs, "I won't tell him".
"No, I'm going to tell him ... She said she went looking for her mother, she is clearly still coming to terms with her death".
Ed screws his face. "Their mother hasn't been declared dead, has she?"
I close the front door which I had partially opened.
"She went missing a mont' or so before ye arrived, an' as far as I know dat's all she is as dey never foun' t' a body. That's how it stood a few mont's ago, not sure now. To be hones' I taught if either of us wu'ld know, it 'u'ld be y'u, ya know livin' 'ear and everythin'"
You would think.
I shake my head.
"Yeah, she were here one momen' n' gone the nex'. Mr Mulder n the kids were out at work n' nursery. Mrs Mulder were still at home, only jus' recently givin' birth. Anyway, they return home to an abandoned baby, an' Mrs Mulder, jus gone. No no', no nothin', no sign of force entry. I was workin' on one of the neighbour's garden, told the old bill I saw a taxi cab aroun' one, but couldn' a sai' it were her". He stops, and I just nod at this new information.
The grandfather clock in the hall chimes for the half hour.
Thanking him again, I show Ed out and say goodnight. Ensuring that the front door is locked and bolted. I then try Dr Mulder but his cell doesn't even ring. Still dressed in my wet bed clothes, I realise that they are still clinging to my skin, my ass, my pelvis, my breasts, and cringe when I think that Ed saw me like this.
Dried, changed, I ease myself into my bed next to Xoë. Her back is to me, I resist the urge to stroke her back and her curls as I don't want to wake her.
But she must still be awake as I hear her turn in the bed.
I'm silent.
"Dana", she whispers.
" ... Yes", I say eventually.
She shuffles up closer to me, and I wrap my arms around her, and stroke her hair, the movement soothing me.
"Why did you suddenly decide to go looking for your mother?" I ask.
She is silent for a while and I think maybe she isn't going to answer. I also realise how much of a stupid question it is to ask a four year old, the answer inevitably being, because I wanted to find her. Such complexities of how, would never enter their mind frame.
"I wasn't looking for Mommy. I was looking for Daddy".
" ... You told me you were looking for your mommy?"
"I lied".
Oh.
"... You know, it's OK to want to find your mommy", I whisper after a while into her hair.
"... I think she wants to be found", she whispers back, and I sigh deeply, resting a hand lovingly on the top of her head.
"I know why you get upset, I know that you miss both your mommy and your daddy, I know because growing up my daddy ... I'm not here to replace your mother", I try again, "I can't help bring her back either - "
"Why?" Xoë croaks, and it breaks my heart.
"Because I don't know where she is baby", I say, placing a kiss on her head. "But I can help bring your father back, but you have to stop fighting me. We have to all of us work together to bring him home".
~xXx~
20:22
My kiss with Ed doesn't bother me as much as I feel it should. Emotions were high, he had just saved my ass, it was a mistake for both of us and didn't mean anything either. Xoë is in high spirits today, which is probably also why it also isn't a concern. Similar to yesterday morning, I am awoken by over excited four year olds jumping up and down on my bed; this time over our up coming trick or treating later. Which of course, they have never done before.
We met up with Ellen, Trent and Missy and went trick or treating in her parents' neighbourhood so that we could leave the kids with them to babysit while we celebrated Miss' birthday in the evening. Trent dressed up as Spiderman, Yvo, I had got an Incredibles outfit, Xoë a witch, Theodore, the most adorable pumpkin outfit - he got compliments from every house we visited and actually received more candy then the kids. Miss, Ellen and I dressed up in our regular cat women get ups that we have been using since Trent's first Halloween. Missy came second in the candy collection, a lot of men answered the door. Missy hogged all of hers, but the kids of course benefited from Theodore's reaping.
"Danes!" I hear my sister's booming voice coming up the stairs from the bedroom Theodore and I are in for his evening feed. I quickly detach his mouth from my nipple, lodging a finger between the two, praying that the loss of contact doesn't wake him up.
"Danes the cab is going to be here in half an hour, you better be ready - "
My back to it, the door bursts open.
"Daaaanes", Missy whines.
"I'll be ready", I chide, carefully placing the still sound asleep Theodore in his Moses basket.
"You're not even changed", she continues.
"What do you mean?" I ask, tearing my gaze away from the baby to her. She and Ellen stand in the doorway. Their cat costumes have been replaced by what looks like Playboy bunny outfits.
"No frickin way", I object, already seeing what's coming.
...
20:57
"Danes! The cabs here!" Missy calls.
Stood hunched over Theodore sleeping in his Moses basket, "OK", I mumble, "just coming". I carefully unwind my finger from Theodore's hold, leaning in for a kiss before breathing in a lungful of his scent. He smells so sweet.
I give him one more kiss and then with trembly hands, retract out the bedroom, closing the door quietly behind me.
I breathe in a huge sigh, tears prickling my eyes.
"Danes!" Missy snaps, and I make my way cautiously down the stairs. I have succumbed to my sisters whims - as it is her birthday and dressed in matching outfit, the shoes ridiculously high, the make up ridiculously OTT, and the corset leotard, ridiculously revealing.
"I'm just going to say bye to the kids", I tell Missy and she rolls her eyes, Ellen smiling at me slightly.
I say goodbye to Trent first, and then Yvo and Xoë. Yvo asks me if I am going swimming, frowning when he feels the strange material of my 'swimming costume', and it immediately lightens my mood.
"Why are you wearing bunny rabbit ears?" Yvo wonders.
"Be good", I say to both of them, a hand resting on either of their knees.
"We will", Xoë says automatically, her hand in a bowl of candy and her eyes fixed on whatever they are watching on the television.
"I'll miss you, Dana", Yvo.
I turn to seem him watching me, and another wave of tears prick my eyes.
"I'll see you in the morning Kiddo ... Kiss", and he leans in for a kiss, his hand reaches to play with my dickie bow afterwards.
The sound of a horn blaring comes from outside.
"I've got to go", and he removes his hand, "kiss, Xoë?" I try, but there is no kiss for me.
Helen's mother smiles fondly at me as she escorts me out the front door. "They'll be fine", she assures.
"I know ... It's just, this is the first time I have left them, in a strange house, without their father ... or their grandmother".
The horn blares again impatiently, and I know I can't leave Missy waiting any longer.
~xXx~
00:01
"Where did you two run off?" Ellen asks Ethan and I with a smirk.
"Dana, your leotard's inside out".
I look down frowning, to see that it is the right way round, and everyone in our group - which has definitely gotten bigger in our absence - bursts out laughing.
My face heats, and Ethan plants a kiss on my cheek before going to sit down on an empty stool.
"I'm just going to get some fresh air".
"Ethan got you all hot and bothered did he Danes?" Missy cackles through her long stylish cigarette and everyone joins in the joke. My eyes glower at her, how is she even getting away with smoking inside? But then that is just Miss. She is refusing to tell everyone her age, and I feel like blurting out to everyone that she is 27. Not that it is old or that she looks it, but there has been a lot of 22 guesses floating around, which I know she has been revelling in.
Ethan offers persistently to go outside with me, and I almost have to snap at him until he succumbs and just stays like I asked.
Once outside, ignoring the drunken jeers from the guys outside, I fish out my cell and check for missed calls or texts from Ellen's parents. There are none and I let out a breath, the tightness in my chest relaxing. I want to call them to check if everything is fine, but it's after midnight, they should be all sound asleep... But maybe not Theodore? ... I wonder if Helen remembered to turn on the baby monitor. I mean I gave it to her on, but what if she accidentally turned it off?
My fingers get ready to dial her but end up calling Dr Mulder instead.
It cuts straight to answer phone.
Again.
I have tried him a few times since Wednesday evening.
"Dana Scully?" someone asks from behind.
I turn frowning, wondering who would be addressing me so impersonally, and at a night club of all places.
A woman. Blonde. Blue eyes. Tall.
Her face is serious as she looks down at me.
My eyes trail over her attire. She is not dressed for being at a night club at all with her long trench coat.
"I'm Marita Cavarrubious. I'm your boss' partner".
Oh.
!
She is his partner! Tall, leggy, slim, blonde, big breasts. She belongs on a tv show about cops, not an actual one. She flashes her badge in front of my dumbstruck gaze. I squint. Yep, that's her, FBI. No wonder Dr Mulder spends all his time at work!
"We tracked your cell. Mulder has been missing all week. Do you know where he is?"
I shake my head, processing the information, "Dr Mulder's been missing all week?", I dumbly repeat her question.
"Yes", she says impatiently, "do you know where he is?"
"No ... I ..."
She sighs, fishing her cell out her pocket. Whoever she's calling, she has on speed dial. Walking away, she's done with me.
But I'm not.
What does she mean Dr Mulder's missing? And what kind of partner is she that she doesn't know his whereabouts?!
"No wait - ", I chase after her, my drunked brain still trying to play catch up. My stilettos echo loudly as I try to run. "I want to help".
... What am I going to tell the children ... ?
She stops and turns, assessing my heels and my attire dubiously.
"If you tracked me from my cell, why can't you him?" I say breathlessly.
She gives me what I would say resembles a sneer."Go back to your party", she says, before stepping into the perfectly timed blacked out car; leaving me on the street corner, a thousand questions racing through my mind.
~xXx~
Saturday
08:22
If you told me this time yesterday that I would be riding in a old VW convie, with an enigmatic trio disguised as a Buddhist monk, Jimi Hendrix and former President Nixon, I wouldn't have believed it, I still don't. It clicked not long after Dr Mulder's partner had left me at the waste side, to contact Dr Mulder's friends, 'The Lone Gunmen', as they call themselves. It had then all happened so fast. Within seconds of me explaining to them as much as I knew had happened, they had told me to stay put and they were on their way. There had been lots of talking, most of it I didn't understand, my input wasn't requested, I just sat dumbly listening, but when they had asked me to go with them, and help find Dr Mulder, I couldn't say no.
I hit send on my reply sms to Mrs Mulder. She picked up the kids around 09:00 yesterday morning from Ellen's parents house, but is just sending me and update on the kids.
"So what makes you think Dr Mulder is going to be at this ...", I trail off, putting my cell back in my pocket. I'm still hazy over where exactly it is we are going. Conscious of the fact however that I have been stuck in this car with them for the past twenty hours. My back and shoulders ache from sitting down so long, my legs keep cramping up, I smell, I'm in desperate need for a pee, but don't want to just do it on the side of the road, and I'm hungry.
"Ellen's Airforce Base", all three of them respond in tandem.
"Right", I sigh, rolling my shoulders for movement, grimacing as it only makes me more uncomfortable, " .. and why are we going there?"
"Mulder contacted us a couple of days ago, saying in was in Idaho - "
" - to see about this test pilot's wife who was saying her husband was ... he was not himself", I interrupt Byers.
Langley snorts, "how about not himself entirely".
Frohike turns frowning, "Mulder told you about the case?" he asks, as if not believing me. He raises his eyes at the other two dubiously.
"He may have mentioned it", I mumble, recalling our discussion from the Sunday before last after he had showed me the case file.
"And did you believe him?" Frohike presses, judging by the small smile on his face, he already knows the answer.
I try to ignore the question but all three eyes are on me, even Byers, who is driving turns in his seat.
I sigh, the simple answer is no. I purse my lips instead.
"Ellen's Airforce Base is a well known hot spot for UFOs and alie - "
" - can we not", I cut off Langley, massaging my temples. This 'road trip' truly getting the better of me, and possibly the still effects of a hangover. We had to drive because neither three of them have a passport or drivers licence; when I asked why, I suffered a four hour lecture on how governments use it to keep taps on you. "... How much longer?"
"Few hours", Byers.
"If you knew where Mulder was", Frohike asks, looking at me through the rear view mirror in his front passenger seat, "why did you ask us where he was?"
"Because I was hoping it wasn't true".
~xXx~
12:00
"So, that's the house of the test pilot, Dr Mulder went to see?" I whisper eagerly.
My spirits have definitely triple folded since the car stopped and we started our stake out. In fact, I find it rather exhilarating.
"That's the house", Langley says, his face next to mine as we peak out one of side windows of the convey.
A thrilling spark rushes through me again, and I have to remind myself why I am here. To bring Dr Mulder back home to his children.
"OK Scully, we can hear you loud and clear from the microphone", Byers says from behind me and I retract my head and turn in the small stopped space. They have wired me up with a microphone and camera, "you're all set to go".
"What's that?" I ask, confused by the concave sort of pillow Frohike is sewing up.
...
12:07
"Can you still here me boys?" I whisper, as I walk up the drive way of 2281 Trinity Drive. The weather is cooler here than it is in DC, something I didn't think about back in DC when I was rushing around, panic throwing clothes into my duffle bag in preparation of this trip. Still, the rush of the adrenaline keeps my limbs warm and agile. That and the fake pregnant belly Frohike has me wearing.
Byers says they can still here me loud and clear.
At the porch now, I go to knock on the door, but as I do, it suddenly opens.
"Hello? Can I help you?" who I guess must be Mrs Baharas, the test pilot's wife who had first raised the alarm about the change in her husband. Her face and voice seem tired and apprehensive, and my heart can't help but feel sorry for her.
"Mommy that lady has a baby in her tummy", the little girl next to her observes. Her daughter most probably. She has long dark hair in two braids tied with ribbons, large brown eyes and a frilly white frock on. Xoë wouldn't be caught dead in that get up I think.
The woman's eyes rest on my bump and she begrudgingly welcomes inside.
...
12:24
"See", Frohike says, when I enter back into the convey, "I told you no one would resist helping a pregnant woman looking for her husband".
"It was ingenious!" I agree, still on a high from my undercover role as Dr Mulder's wife; it took all my will not to skip off excitedly when I had said goodbye to Mrs Baharas.
"Great undercover work".
"I thought what you said about your heart not only breaking for yourself, but your children, was particularly touching".
I meant it.
"Thanks", I smile uneasily.
"She totally isn't convinced that that's her husband".
"They've probably threatened her".
She seemed uneasy to me too, on the verge of emotional through our whole conversation, but I can't let myself get carried away by that, she is not who it am here for.
"But what about Dr Mulder?"
"Scully's right. Ingenious or not, she said she didn't know where Mulder was", Byers points out.
"Do you think she was lying?" I ask hopefully.
Byers shrugs, "do you?"
"She seemed genuine to me ... So what do we do now?" I ask, disheartened.
Byers looks over at Langley with a face that shows we have come to a dead end.
"Was her husband there?" Langley.
"Not what it looked like".
Langley nods, "we could go the husband's work, try seeing if he knows where - "
"Hey, hey guys, we have some action", we all turn to Frohike with his binoculars, hurrying to huddle around him. He passes me the binoculars.
"It's Dr Mulder's partner", I say recognising her face.
"Yeah", Frohike agrees.
"Do you think she followed me?"
"Only one way to find out".
~xXx~
12:53
Marita stays at the house for all of a few minutes. Mrs Baharas either not wanting to speak to her, or seeing through her disguise, but it elates me to know that I had managed to gain her trust. We follow Marita into a nearby diner, we watch her sitting solo with her mug of coffee for twenty minutes before she exits and starts walking towards our convey.
"Obviously our skills of disguise aren't as well as we thought", I say to the others.
We let her in and she apologises for Thursday evening, saying that she was under watch. From who, she doesn't say. She does say that she knows where Dr Mulder is, that she always had, and that he's been held at Ellen's Airforce Base for trespassing since Tuesday.
"But if you knew where he was all the time, why did you have to ask me where he was?"
"Because you weren't allowed to help him", Byers answers for her, the others humming in agreement, understanding something I do not.
"But your his partner!" I protest. "It's your job to have his back!"
"And I do", her voice rising slightly by my accusation, "but Mulder trespassed on no entry military property. He had been warned already, they wouldn't take it when they caught him a second time".
I let out a deep sigh; fully knowing his stubbornness and resistance for authority, it's something that I have to deal with his daughter on a daily basis. It angers me, age whatever he is, that he would be so selfish, especially when he is responsible for three children.
"Well how long is he going to be sanctioned for?" I ask, and it triggers a round of snorts and sniggers.
Marita suppresses a smile, "it doesn't quite work like that. I only found out that Mulder was being held there from a highly classified undercover source".
"So what?!" I blurt out, "that's just it?! We just give up?!" my mind immediately being filled with the children's faces when I tell them that their father is also not coming home.
"No", Marita says sternly, offended that I would even suggest it. "That's why I approached you that night, because I can't help Mulder without compromising myself, but you can".
~xXx~
14:52
Point and drive. Those were the instructions. Marita had apprehended one of the army base's prison guards at gun point; he was posing as a newspaper reporter on UFOs in the area, but somehow Marita had known that he wasn't. Now he's handcuffed with a canvas over his head while I drive a stolen car with a gun to him. Leaving me ten miles out from the army base, Marita the Gunmen had done it to make it easier for me. But still, my nerves are high, I am sweating all over, and feel like I am forever having to re grip my hold on the steering wheel and the handgun they have given me. My throat is parched. I am pretty sure if it wasn't for the fact I have probably sweated out every ounce of liquid out of me, I would be wetting my pants. My natural instinct is to run away, to cry, but the kids keep me driving.
But ... What the FUCK am I doing?!
I should be spending the day lying in Ethan's bed, sleeping Thursday night's hangover off, with the occasional round of sex and fast food in bed. Not driving with a gun to some strangers head, after travelling over twenty four hours, journeying to the middle of nowhere to spring my boss out of military jail.
"This is a strictly regulated area, Mam?" the officer at Ellen's Airforce asks when I arrive at the first checkpoint. I better my grip on my handgun. "I think you've perhaps taken a wrong turning".
"I've come for my husband, F, Fox Mulder", I try to train my voice as low as possible, but it still comes out in a squeak, "he's been held for trespassing in your base".
The officer frowns, leaning in, her eyes rest a moment on my pregnancy bump, before the gun I have pointed to the prison guard's head.
~xXx~
18:50
A helicopter took us back to DC, and while a car drove me home, Dr Mulder stayed to discuss the case with his partner and the Lone Gunmen. He dismissed me, instructing that I better get back home to the children. Like I hadn't crossed states, put my life in critical danger, held someone at gun point to save his ass. I stormed out the room, my nostrils are still flaring.
I am in the bath in my ensuite when Dr Mulder comes home. I hear the twins scream his name. A smile forms on my lips despite myself, I sink lower into the bubble bath Mrs Mulder drew for me on my arrival, fully relaxed now, knowing that the children had their father back at home.
Theodore had thankfully been asleep when I returned home, I don't think I could have taken his tears, but Xoë and Yvo were there to welcome me. Yvo had made me feel beyond guilty for not being there when he woke up on Friday, like I said I would. Even Xoë seemed anxious, it warmed me that even she couldn't disguise the skip in her step when she saw me.
The baby is now asleep in his cot, and even though I want to I don't have the heart to wake him. It would only be fore ten minutes or so anyway as Ethan is due to pick me up soon. I missed him so much these past few days. With one final glance, I exit the nursery.
"Dana!" Yvo greets me now at the bottom of the stairs, giving me like the tenth hug since I got back. He jumps up and down. "Daddy's home!" he says gleefully, showing me his full watt smile, which has been missing the left front tooth since last Thursday. It was the first of the twins' tooth to be lost, and I had gone to the subway stationing DC to get dollar coins in change, putting one of them underneath his pillow at night. Since then, I have had to stop Xoë four times from trying to pull one of hers out. Finally reasoning that the Tooth Fairy wouldn't come if she knew it hadn't fallen out naturally.
"You're home and Daddy's home!" Yvo continues, his weight as he jumps bringing me up and down with him.
"Yvo", Dr Mulder chuckles, I look up to see him emerging out of his office and my smile falls, picking it up when I rest my gaze back on my four year old. "Give Dana a rest ... She's had a hard few days".
I can feel his eyes burning all over me.
"I'm going home for the weekend Kiddo. I'll see you tomorrow evening".
"You are?" Dr Mulder.
Yvo whines.
Still ignoring Dr Mulder, like he did me earlier. I chuckle at Yvo's fallen face. "I always go home on the weekend".
"I know but today's a Sat-day not Friday", he reasons.
"I need a break, Bub", I say truthfully, cupping his face in my hands and bringing it up from the ground to look at me.
"From us?" his expanse blue eyes ask.
I shake my head, giving him a kiss on his lips, "no, never from you".
From your father.
Dr Mulder clears his throat. "Dana, I would like to speak to you in my office".
My arm hairs stick up in end - Dana not Scully.
I reluctantly turn to him, his face is apprehensive. It annoys me that he hasn't bothered to wash or change since I picked him up from the army base. I ignore the pang that goes through me when I again register how lean he has gotten.
"Sure", I say, non committedly.
"Yvo, if you could give me and Dana a few moments to ourselves", Dr Mulder asks his son when we are all in his office and he sees that Yvo is still attached to my hip.
Yvo whines, "noooo", turning and burying his head further into my thigh.
"You can stay if you like", I coddle, contradicting Dr Mulder with a look and a raise of my eyebrow. Challenging him to second guess me.
... Dana this is your boss ...
"...Fine", Dr Mulder bites, but clearly not impressed or fine with me undermining his authority - But then I'm not impressed with him getting himself locked up in a military jail.
Dana.
He doesn't speak at first, so my eyes search the room for something to do. I spot a poster near the wall behind his desk. It is of a UFO, the words, 'I Want to Believe', are written in bold words above it. I suspect that it has always been there but it is the first time I have noticed it. My jaw clenches, my eyebrows rising.
My eyes fall back on him, and I catch his nervous stare looking between me and the poster.
"Look ... I'm sorry", he says finally.
"What are you sorry for, Daddy? What did you do wrong?" Yvo asks.
Dr Mulder hesitates, looking down at his son, before resting his eyes back up on me. "I didn't mean to dismiss you like I did earlier ... I mean, I didn't mean it to come out the way it did ... I just", he sighs, "I wanted you to get back to the children, I was uneasy and worried about them, especially after not having seen you since Thursday".
I clear my throat, having to admit, I understand that reasoning. "I understand", I mumble.
"- and, to thank you again, for coming to my rescue", he pulls one of his lop sided, panty dropping smiles, and holds it.
His smile willing me to smile back.
Willing it to erase everything that I am mad at him about.
I try in vain to not succumb to his boyish charms, but that pull of a smile betrays me. I roll my eyes at myself.
I feel Yvo's head move from side to side against my thigh, and after a few seconds, he bursts out giggling, and Dr Mulder and I can't help but be captivated by his giggles and join in.
Yvo leaps from me into his father's arms. Now seeing father and son together, I have a full watt smile on my face, and I know that for now, for this moment, Dr Mulder is in my OK books.
He realises this too, his smile on me widening.
I shake my head at him, at myself, for me letting him slide so easy.
Dr Mulder's stare on me suddenly turns serious, and it catches me by surprise. His eyes bore into mine, as if he is trying to consume all of me in that single stare.
"Daddy, you need to go on the naughty step", Yvo orders, breaking our moment, and Dr Mulder and I both chuckle.
"I do, why?" he asks, ruffling Yvo's curls.
"For being n-aughty!" he squeals as Dr Mulder turns him upside down.
"Is that so?" Dr Mulder asks, swinging him side to side.
"Yes", Yvo shouts. "For ... A ... Whole ... Hour!" he manages, whilst being used as a pendulum.
His face is getting quite red and I instinctually move forward to collect him, but Dr Mulder sees this and places him back down.
Ethan's horn blazes, filling our threatened nervous silence.
"We'll see you tomorrow evening", Dr Mulder smiles. I haven't actually told him or anyone about Ethan, but I wonder who it is he suspects that picks me up and drops me back on the weekend. Maybe he thinks its just a cab.
"Hmmm", I tease. The door swinging open as Xoë bursts into the room, probably to tell me that it's time for me to go. I catch her in a sort of hug that she allows me to hold but doesn't return. "Make sure your Daddy doesn't get into too much trouble while I'm away".
"We will", they say in synchrony.
I let go of Xoë and turn to leave when something flies past me as I'm about to exit the office door.
"What was that?" I ask, turning.
Dr Mulder smiles mischievously at me, and both the twins are pointing enthusiastically at him.
"UFO. Unidentified. Flying. Object".
I roll my eyes, muttering as I leave.
"You know, sometimes she can be really scary", I hear Yvo whisper to his father.
...
22:42
I'm grateful to have Ethan to loose myself in after a stressful week, this one in particular, but it gets me wondering about Dr Mulder. I always assumed that Phoebe was one of his many women he had at his disposable. I mean, there is no denying his attractiveness, he has to have women throwing themselves at him. But if his wife is -
"Uh Dana?" Ethan halts my thoughts. He's being languidly teasing my breasts, his saliva still hot on my chest. "I think ...", he latches on to one of them again, "I think you're lactating?" he asks confused.
What?!
I sit up, reaching for my disheveled t-shirt from the floor. I feel my breasts, I had noticed they had gotten more swollen, but I never thought that Theodore's suckling these past four weeks would actually lead to me naturally lactating!
I chuck on my t-shirt.
My cheeks heating in the silence. I don't really want to explain to Ethan why my breasts are lactating.
"... Lets just continue", I say leaning in for a kiss. I slap away his hand, when it tries to creep back under the garment.
...
Sunday
01:37
I lay awake, my mind buzzing. Deciding that I can't stay laying flat anymore, I ease out of bed, careful not to wake Ethan. It is usual for me to lie awake at this time, as it is usually the time I get up to feed Theodore. However the thoughts from the last few days whizzing around my brain are second to none to what is usually mulling in my mind. I still can't believe that I crossed states, held a gun to a stranger's head, went undercover to free Dr Mulder from a military jail. I can't believe how OK I feel about it.
I fire up my mac, and while I wait for it to load, I flick through the pictures I took of the kids on Halloween with my iTouch. I decide to make one of them my screen picture.
After setting my screen saver on my mac of the same photograph. I fish out my diary and a pen from my bag, and set to work on making more progress on schools for Xoë and Yvo in January. Mrs Mulder had left me another note. It is still being disputed, but I want to make sure that regardless, my part is done. I head the top of today's date with twins initials, and I smile realising the first letters of their names are the male and female chromosomes, X and Y.
How very scientific.
~xXx~
Wednesday 6th November
10:13
I have dropped Xoë and Yvo off at nursery, and decided that it was great weather for a walk in the park with Theodore. The sun was out, the sky was clear, and all the fall colours were out. Not really wanting to take the tank when there is already limited parking around the park, I decided to take the bus instead. It would be Sod's law that the moment I put Theodore in his baby sling that he falls asleep, leaving me to spend the bus trip to stare aimlessly out the window.
My mind drifts to Sunday night ...
It's very late in the evening when the taxi drops me off at the Mulder mansion. It was Ethan's birthday and we went out for a fancy meal; his parents had flown in from Idaho of all places, especially. The bill had been half my weekly pay cheque.
Conscious that it is almost midnight, I tiptoe may way to my bedroom, shedding all my clothes and jewellery as I stand and crawling into my bed. Mrs Mulder must have changed the sheets too, as they smell freshly laundered. I take in a huge lungful, closing my eyes and smile contently.
I was just drifting off when I hear a faint knock on my door.
Internally groaning, I figure it is one of the kids and if I am really quite they might just go away.
The door opens smoothly and I frown.
"Dana", a whisper.
Dr Mulder.
It's definitely Dr Mulder's voice.
His foot steps walk over towards my side of the bed, and I screw my eyes shut.
They stop near my bed and I hear him chuckle softly.
My clothes! Which I left in a pile.
I hear him exhale as he crouches on the floor, and then the soft thud of my clothes as he places them on the cabinet, he then patters back to my side of the bed.
"Dana", he whispers again, crouching. I have to be careful not to jolt, when he fingers along the length of my right eyebrow.
I decide the best thing to do is to admit I am awake, he must have heard me come in just a few minutes ago anyway.
I open my eyes, but all I make is the outline of his profile in the darkness.
"Dr Mulder?" I whisper, glued to the spot.
My heartbeat has stilled.
He hasn't stopped rubbing my eyebrow ... his touch is very nice ... it's very ... soothing.
He leans in so that his breath is hot against my mouth. "I wanted to give you this last night", he pulls his hand from my face and I miss it immediately. "I still can't believe you travelled all that way, doing everything you did, just to help me. You're, you're crazy", he laughs and I chuckle. "No one has ever done that for me before", he says, his tone going very serious. He waits maybe a moment before he leans in and captures my lips in his.
The kiss is sweet, but gone all to soon. Gone before I can get over my initial shock of it and respond.
"Thank you", he implores again, "thank you for bringing me back to my children", and then he leaves...
I smile stupidly at the memory, my lips tingling.
It is disturbed however when my eyes make contact through the bus window, with the driver of a passing car. Mouth open, her eyes then fall onto the baby in the sling, before reaching back to mine.
My mother.
so ... Ed, Ethan, Mulder? Scully's mission to save Mulder? X and Y? Mrs Mulder? Marita? What did you guys think? Unitil next update :)