It was late in the evening and already dark when Pepper returned to the mansion after dealing with any leftovers at Stark Industries that were not tackled when Tony was there during the day. She walked into the darkened mansion and asked Jarvis to turn up the lights. It was then, she saw Tony sitting on the couch with the box next to him, looking almost furious.
Tony looked up when Pepper came in. His eyes burned with anger and pain all in one. He felt betrayed and that betrayal bore through his heart like a white hot poker. "Care to explain why this box was hiding under the couch rather than where I had put it?"
Pepper froze under Tony's cold glare. She had never been the target of this before and she didn't know how to react to it. "I saw it in the closet and I was curious about it."
"You were curious about it?" Tony snapped. "I have very little in my life that was ever private…stuff that was only mine. Most of what was in this box meant a great deal to me and I didn't want it out for the world to know about. For the most part, this is all I have left of my parents…of what little childhood I actually had. I trust you with nearly every aspect of my life so why the hell did you go behind my back with this? Why didn't you just ask me?"
Pepper was having trouble breathing. She had never seen Tony so upset. "I was afraid you wouldn't tell me." She said quietly.
"When is there something I keep from you if you ask me?" Tony said angrily as his voice thickened with emotion and his eyes went glassy. "Most of it I would have told you if you had TRUSTED me like I did trust you."
Even the words hurt to say and the pain was written all over Tony's face. Taking that box without asking him almost felt like he was being violated in some way. Tony couldn't even find most of the words to express how he felt right now. Tears stung his eyes and he would be damned if he broke himself right in front of Pepper now since she was the cause of it.
"I can't be here right now." He said as he grabbed his jacket and his car keys. He stopped once more before going to the door, looking at Pepper with glassy eyes, almost wanting to say something but didn't. Instead, Tony turned and left without a word, slamming the door behind him.
As the door slammed and echoed through the house, Pepper fell to her knees in the middle of the floor with the realization of how much she had hurt him. It felt like an elephant was sitting on her chest it was so hard to breathe. Rhodey had been right. She should have never snooped in the box. If she hadn't gone in there, despite the best intentions, she would have never have hurt Tony so badly that he felt that he couldn't be in the same room with her. With love always comes pain but how badly will it hurt if the love is shared but not proclaimed?
Pepper pulled herself off the floor and turned back towards the couch where the box was. The lid was partially off and a video tape was sitting on the table marked as 'Hawaiian Vacation – 1986'. Her conscience was telling her to put the video in the box and tape it back up but another side was saying watch the video and copy it to a DVD to preserve it for him, even though he would still be mad.
Pepper sniffed and wiped at her eyes as she put the video into the VCR. "Jarvis, can you please convert this to a DVD?" she asked.
"You should not be watching this, Ms. Potts." Jarvis reminded her.
"I know Jarvis. I know I shouldn't be but this is addictive. Consider this my last unless Tony tells me I can see more." Pepper said. "Jarvis, please start the video."
There was a delay in response, Jarvis' version of showing his displeasure with the situation but being forced to comply.
The video opened with a shot of Maria and Howard Stark in a hotel lobby but Tony wasn't anywhere to be seen. Howard was checking in when the sound came in…
Upon arrival at the hotel and eager to start the vacation, Tony started rummaging through the bags while his parents were checking in to the hotel room. It took a little bit but he found what he was looking for – the video camera. He adjusted the view finder and pointed it in the direction of his parents.
"Live from the beautiful state of Hawaii from the island of Maui, we bring you the Stark family vacation. See here, we have the head of the family, the very powerful Howard Stark and his wife Maria," Tony said, trying to narrate like Robin Leach on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. Then he turned the camera on himself. "And of course their handsome and genius son, Tony, who is right now serving as your narrator and director." Tony flashed a smile and then turned it back to his parents as his father was showing signs of annoyance. "Hey! Mom! Dad! Smile, you're on candid camera!" he called out to him.
"Tony, knock it off." Howard said sternly as he turned around briefly and then back to the desk clerk.
"See the typical American father getting annoyed on vacation when a reservation isn't handled right…" Tony said in narration again.
"Tony," Maria said warningly. "Didn't your father just tell you to turn it off?"
"But Mom…you said you wanted movies of the vacation and the vacation includes Dad getting mad at the desk clerk. This will be really funny later, you'll see."
"Anthony Edward Stark…" Maria started with a sure threat.
"Turning it off now," Tony said before his mother finished her statement.
The next time the camera turned on, they were at a beach. Tony was in the water while his parents were taking in the sun.
Howard dug the camera out and turned it on, using his wife as his first subject.
"Hey beautiful." He said as he focused in on Maria.
"Howard, what are you doing?"
"Filming the most beautiful woman out on the sands here."
"How about spending some of that film on the boy out in the water there?" Maria said as she pointed to Tony snorkeling. "How about joining the boy out there as well? You have too much energy today."
The camera dipped down a bit as Howard stole a kiss from his wife and then passed the camera to her.
"Hey Dad! Is that camera waterproof?" Tony called out from the water.
"No, why?" Howard called back.
"Too bad because there are some awesome fish down here that you just gotta see!"
"Howard, your son is calling you to join him." Maria hinted as she pointed the camera at Howard and then followed him down to the edge of the beach as he swam out to meet up with Tony.
Behind the camera, Maria was smiling and laughing as she watched her men scavenge the ocean floor with masks and snorkels, putting aside every day life and enjoying themselves.
The picture went dark and then came back on a bus ride.
"Here we are on the ride up to the top of Haleakala, the extinct volcano on one half of the island of Maui," Howard narrated. "It is said that it is actually cold at the top but it has the most brilliant sunrises." He then panned to Maria. "But no sunrise compares to this beauty."
"Howard, how do I put up with you?" Maria sighed with a tired voice. It was only three in the morning.
"You are madly in love with me," Howard answered before panning to a sleeping Tony in the next seat. "Vacation already killed the kid there."
"Kid is not dead but kid wishes the sun came up later," Tony mumbled before shifting in the seat and turning his back to his father.
At the top of the mountain, Howard filmed his family watching the sunrise while wearing sweatshirts and jackets in Hawaii. Then, all three took the bike ride down to the base of the mountain where they met another bus to take the Road to Hana – a three hour, fifty-two mile trip with fifty-six bridges and 617curves, some single lane. Only part of the tour got on camera – Tony walking along a black sand beach with his mother.
The picture went dark again and then came back on a ranch.
"Today comes the great horse adventure," Tony narrated into the camera before turning it on his parents who were both on horseback like he was. "The question remains will city boy Howard Stark not embarrass himself by falling off his valiant steed that is named Goof Ball while his wife Maria shows him and her ever so talented son up completely."
"Does everything have to be this dramatic, Tony?" his father asked as he pulled on the reins to turn the horse.
"Yes. It makes for a better flick. You don't want people falling asleep when you show these to people, right?" Tony said before he passed the camera off to one of the ranch hands to film their departure.
Upon their return, the ranch hand filmed them again. Maria came in as elegantly as she left while Tony and Howard were covered in sand from when they both tripped getting off the horse for a break.
The picture cut again and then came back in an airport.
"Welcome to Maui's great airport," Tony said some what sarcastically as he turned the camera on himself while they waited for their flight. "Why we didn't tell the private jet to come get us and make the hop to Oahu, I don't know. But here we are waiting for the plane to take us to vacation phase two." Tony then turned the camera on his mother who was reading a magazine. "Hey Mom. What do you think the best part of the vacation was so far?"
"Watching you and your father hit the sand getting off your horses. It was wildly funny once I knew you were alright."
Then Tony turned the camera on his dad. "Dad, same question."
"Something I am not going to say on camera." Howard said with a perfectly straight face without even looking up from his newspaper as a gasp from his mother could be heard off camera before she took a swat at Howard.
Tony turned the camera back on himself. "I don't want to know." He said before turning the camera off.
The next shot was back on the beach again, this time Waikiki.
Howard had a good perch from the beach as he pointed the camera towards the water where Tony was attempting to surf.
"Maria, I had better film this because if Tony actually gets up on that board for more than a few seconds, it may never happen again."
"That's not nice Howard. How about encouraging him?" Maria commented as she watched Tony hit the water again.
"I am encouraging him. He can show the video and brag about the one and only time he surfed Waikiki."
"Well, you had better start filming Howard because he's about to catch a wave." Maria pointed out as Tony started to paddle and actually caught a wave that he could stand up on.
Tony was up and actually surfing for a grand total of two minutes before he wiped out. He popped up out of the water with a big smile on his face. "Did you see it?" he cried out excitedly. "I surfed Waikiki. I am so going to show this off in Malibu."
The shot then came back on a luau.
Howard had wrestled the camera away from Tony for the luau with much effort. He filmed the fire dancers and the raising of the pig and Maria and Tony having a great time. Tony reclaimed the camera back at the hotel room.
Tony panned around the hotel room, showing his mother resting on the bed and a closed bathroom door before turning it on himself. "Dad did not listen to the warning about eating too much of that coconut jell-o and now he's paying the price for it."
"Tony, stop it." Maria warned.
"This part of the vacation Mom," Tony protested.
"Anthony…"
"I got it…" and the camera went black.
The next shot was Howard and Tony on a golf course.
"Maria? Are you getting this? No one can ever say I never taught the boy anything about business." Howard said as he was trying to teach Tony to tee off.
"What does golf have to do with business?" Maria asked.
"Best place to make business deals because people aren't totally paying attention unless you are beating them. Then, make the deal over drinks later." Howard said with a laugh.
"Dad? What do you do when the ball goes for a swim?" Tony asked.
"What?"
"The ball…it went in the water." Tony said again as he pointed at the ocean.
"Do over." Howard answered.
The picture went black for one more time and then reopened on Pearl Harbor.
The camera date read July 4, 1986 as Howard started filming. There were far fewer jokes on this one. Tony was positively entranced by all the history in the room as Howard filmed it before they took the ferry out to the U.S.S. Arizona.
As the boarded the boat, Howard passed the camera off to Maria and went up to Tony who was riding at the front.
"Tony, remember one thing about this place. This isn't just some wreck…this is a gravesite for hundreds of American sailors and soldiers who died in battle. Show them the respect that they deserve." Howard told his son as they docked.
"I understand, Dad. I do understand." Tony said seriously as he walked beside his parents to the viewing point over the Arizona.
As Howard looked down at the battleship below, he was visibly moved by it. His work on the Manhattan Project had helped to end the war forty years earlier but seeing this still reminded him what he did.
The video faded out once more and Pepper had sat and watched silently throughout the whole thing, except for laughing at Tony at thirteen. She got to see the people that she had been hearing so much about and how much they loved Tony for herself and it made her love for Tony even stronger. It also cut her even deeper to know how much she had hurt him for going behind his back. She just didn't want to apologize to him – she needed to apologize to him and as fast as possible.
Pepper pulled out her cell phone and hit the speed dial to call Tony. It rang once and then went to voice mail. She tried again and it went directly to voice mail for the second time. She had to find him and then called the only other person who may be able to find Tony – James Rhodes.
When Rhodey picked up the phone, he could barely get out 'hello' before Pepper started speaking frantically.
"Please tell me you know where Tony is," she rattled out quickly. "He's not answering his phone and I don't know where he went when he left here. He was very upset."
"I know where he is and why he isn't answering his phone," Rhodey answered back in a far calmer tone than that which Pepper had used. "He's lying on my couch at the moment sound asleep and trying to get rid of a splitting headache that he has." He continued as he left the living room and headed into the bedroom as to not upset Tony any further than he already was. "Do you realize that it has taken me the last two hours to calm him down and get him to talk to me about what happened? He showed up on my doorstep looking worse than when I found him when Obadiah ripped the arc reactor out of his chest and left him to die. I almost thought that you had left him or died and then when he finally started talking to me, I found out it was worse. You are like the one person he trusts completely without hesitation and as far as he was concerned you went behind his back. I know you meant it to be harmless and that was why I helped and I tried to explain that to him but to Tony, you broke what trust he had."
"Can you please tell me what happened? I have to apologize to him." Pepper pleaded.
Rhodey sighed and he shut the bedroom door. "When he showed up here, he looked worse than he did at his parents' funeral. He was shaking on my doorstep for crying out loud. I got him in and sat him down and refused him when he asked for a drink. I asked him what happened and he nearly broke down right in front of me. I couldn't understand him at first. When he calmed down enough, I got that he found out that you found the box. Then when I got quiet, he figured that I had helped you. He then got pissed at me and nearly walked out. I had to stop him and force him to go back to the couch and listen for the sake of our friendship and for all the shit he had put me through he owed me. So he obliged me while he sulked. I told him that you just wanted to get to know him better and what I told you were humorous stories and nothing that he swore me to secrecy over. Tony seemed to be listening until I heard his voice crack again when he asked why you had to go behind his back instead of asking him directly. I told him you did that because you knew he would not give up that info willingly. After that, he was a bit calmer but still miserable. He told me he had a headache so I gave him a few Advil and a bottle of water to help with the dehydration that caused the headache and then he laid down and fell asleep."
"Can I talk to him? I have to apologize and make this right." Pepper begged.
"Before he fell asleep he said he was not even going to consider an apology over the phone." Rhodey stated. "He added that when he screws up this badly, he apologizes in person and that is what he wants."
"Is he coming home tonight?"
"I'm not going to wake him up to send him home," Rhodey insisted. "If he wants to, he'll go home when he's ready to in the morning. Until then, I would recommend you think about what you are going to say to him."
Pepper sighed as her breath caught in her throat. "For what it's worth, thank you."
"You're welcome." Rhodey replied before hanging up.
The next morning, Tony slipped quietly into his house by driving directly into the garage, setting his keys on his desk and tossing his jacket over a nearby chair.
"Welcome home, sir." Jarvis stated as he brought up the windows.
"Thanks Jarvis," Tony said with lingering sadness in his voice. He was about to walk upstairs to take a shower and get a cup of coffee when he saw Pepper asleep on his couch. He didn't say anything, he just kept walking.
Pepper awoke when she heard the Audi pull in and saw Tony not even acknowledging her. She scrambled off the couch and got directly in his path so he couldn't go further upstairs.
"Tony, stop please. Let me explain." She pleads with him.
Tony turns sideways and tries to go past her but she stops him again.
"I am so sorry for going behind your back on this but I just wanted to get to know you better. You are someone I care about very much." Pepper stated as her eyes welled up again.
"Why the hell didn't you just ask me?" Tony mumbled under his breath as he pushed her aside once more.
Pepper grabbed his hand and forced him to stop again. "Tony. I am sorry. Believe me when I say the last thing I ever wanted to do was hurt you and lose your trust in me." She pleaded with him. "What do I have to do to make this up to you?"
Tony turned around and looked at Pepper with glassy, bloodshot eyes. "Prove it." He stated flatly before continuing upstairs to the shower he wanted.
After getting out of the shower and getting his daily dose of caffeine and something to eat, Tony was in a slightly better mood. It was enough improved that he actually went searching for Pepper. He found her working diligently as always in her office except that her eyes were red.
"I told you that you are all that I have," he said quietly, forcing Pepper to look up. "You are also one of the only people I would trust with my life completely but what you did really hurt. Why didn't you just ask me? Even with the things you did ask me, I had to force you to bring it up to me – the catapult, my lion, the dancing. You know very well I don't like people going behind my back on things. You should know that most of all."
Pepper didn't know what to say. Tony was right and she could not dispute it. "I can only apologize infinitely for what I did especially since it seems what I did was worse than what Obadiah did to you. The only difference is that I wasn't trying to hurt you…in fact it was quite the opposite. I can only hope that one day you can forgive me for this and trust me again."
"What you did was not worse than Obadiah," Tony said with a hint of reassurance in his voice. "And I care about you too much not to forgive you and put this behind us on one condition."
"What condition?" Pepper asked, willing to do just about anything.
"Make me a promise," Tony started as he sat down in the chair in front of her so he was no longer looming over her. "Promise me that if you want to know anything about me or what is in that box, please ask me. Can you do that for me?"
Pepper nodded. "I promise….I promise…" she said as she smiled at him.
The weight of the world seemed to come off of Tony's shoulders as he relaxed and smiled. "Now…just one more thing," he said with a small smirk.
"Yes Tony?"
"If you really want to make me feel better, you can come join me in the hot tub. I mean Rhodey's couch is fine and all but it left an ache in my back which the shower didn't get rid of. You can maybe work it out for me with the massage oil?"
Pepper just laughed. "When?"
Tony nearly swallowed his tongue that she did not say no. "If you're serious…right now." He said, getting a little excited.
"Fine, you just have to keep at least your underwear on." Pepper replied.
"What fun is that if I can't make you blush?" Tony stated as he left her office and started up the stairs. "Meet you upstairs. Hopefully you can stop me before I get completely undressed."