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Chapter 10

Six weeks

Sam felt like he should have said something sooner, but kept putting it off, imagining how Dean would act. He was right in his assumptions. Even though he wasn't the one who said it. As soon as the words" Dean, I don't want you to hunt anymore" came out of Castiel's mouth, Dean's face contorted angrily.

"But why? I'm still a hunter, I have my instincts." Dean said loudly, banging his hand on the table so hard that the pile of books resting on it trembled precariously.

"Listen, Dean, Cas is right. You can't hunt right now." Sam said, glancing at the angel. As much as he didn't want to agree with Cas about anything, he had to this time. Although he was starting to barely accept the angel, against his instincts. He cursed himself when he found a smile creeping over his face at the way Dean was sleeping curled up the other night, with his head on Cas' lap. Then he remembered that the angel shouldn't be trusted. However, he was finding it harder and harder to believe that.

"It's for your own protection." Castiel added lightly. "You cannot be allowed to hunt."

"You two are just...son of a bitch!" Dean knocked his chair over, and stormed into the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

Sam glared at Cas. They should have done it more gently..but no, the damn angel had to just go out and say it. Cas looked completely out of place in this situation. They could hear Dean cursing loudly in the bathroom and heard a crash as he threw something at the wall.

"Let me talk to him," Sam said. "I'll get him to understand. You'll only make it worse." He hesitated before going to the bathroom door. Knocking lightly, he said, "Dean?"

"Shut up." Dean snapped from inside.

"Come on. Let me in." Sam jiggled the handle, finding that it wasn't locked, thought not due to Dean's attempts. The damn lock was busted. "Dean?"

The older Winchester was sitting on the floor, leaning against the tub, head in his hands. Sam slipped down next to him. "Hey. Listen, we just want you to be safe."

Dean raised his head, and Sam's heart leapt when he saw tears in his brother's eyes.

"Are you alright?"

"Screw you." Dean snarled, wiping his eyes. "What do you think?"

Sam scooted a few inches away from Dean, unsure of what his brother was going to do. It looked like he wanted to hit something, and he didn't want that something to be his face. His instincts told him to let this conversation go, but he knew he couldn't, for Dean's sake. "I know you want to keep hunting, but it makes sense-"

"I know." Dean interjected.

Sam raised his eyebrows, taken aback. "What?"

"Sammy, I know. But that doesn't mean I have to like it." Fresh tears fell from Dean's eyes as the hunter broke. "Everything is changing..I can't deal with it."

Sam moved to put an arm around Dean, but the hunter gave him a dirty look and he withdrew his hand before Dean could bite it off. Dean shook his head, wrapping his arms around himself as Sam watched helplessly.

"I'm good." Dean assured Sam, even though tears were still falling onto the cold tile floor. The brothers looked up as a shadow fell upon them to see Castiel standing there in the doorway uncertainly.

"Dean." Cas said softly, noticing the tears falling freely. He could feel Dean's frustration, confusion and anger. Dean got to his feet, and it seemed as if time stopped for a second as he stared at the angel. A ghost of of smile possessed Cas' lips as he drew his arms open invitingly, and suddenly Dean broke, falling into them.

Sam regarded the scene with a fair amount of disgust. Dean goes to the angel instead of his own brother. What's wrong with that picture?

Cas' eyes were closed, face pressed close to Dean's as he whispered soothingly into his ear. Sam stood, pushing past the angel roughly, and Castiel looked up as Sam stormed away. Dean stole his attention back as he gripped the front of Cas' shirt tightly in his fists. A patch of wetness was spreading as Dean's quiet sobs increased.

Dean was cursing at himself inwardly, screaming not to be such a wimp, men don't sob like he was doing. But at the moment he didn't care what anyone thought; he couldn't stop.

Cas stroked Dean's hair, talking soothingly to him.

"It's alright, Dean." he kissed the hunter's forehead and held him until the tears lessened. "I'm here."

"Yeah, and that's the reason all of this is happening." Sam said angrily from across the room.

Dean lifted his head from Cas' chest, those words sparking something in him. A look of pure fury burned in his eyes. "Don't."

"Why not?" Sam said, taking a few steps back toward the pair. "It's true. This piece of shit raped you. How you can forgive him, I don't know, but then you go to him for comfort? I don't understand you anymore, Dean."

Dean snarled, ripping away from Castiel and pouncing on Sam. "Don't call him that." he slugged Sam hard before Cas could grab him. Dean panted as Castiel held him back and a smug look came over Sam's face. He almost felt like childishly sticking his tongue out, and then his face throbbed where Dean had hit him.

"Dean-" Cas started, holding him tight, but the hunter wouldn't hear it.

"Just leave me alone!" Dean pushed Cas away violently and threw a furious look at Sam before leaving the room, slamming the door behind him so that the frame shook.

Sam flipped the middle finger at the closed door, scowling. He was done with this crap. Cas stood, troubled, in the middle of the room. He had caused this; two brothers who were so close, and now they were fighting. Because of him. Sam turned to the angel to curse him out some more, but it was too late; Castiel was gone.

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Dean was sitting alone in the dark on a park bench not far from the cockroach paradise they were staying at. He couldn't comprehend why Sam couldn't understand the relationship between him and Cas. Yeah, Cas had done something terrible, but if that hadn't happened, they wouldn't have happened.

Tears burned in his eyes again and he pressed his palms to them in an effort to stem the flow, feeling like a woman who was watching a soap opera where her favorite character had died. It was kind of like a soap opera, this situation, and that thought made a small smile break out under the tears. The jealous brother who hates the man who impregnated his brother. That would probably make for a good, but controversial show. His tears stopped as he pondered this.

"Dean." The voice brought Dean from his strange thoughts and the hunter looked up. Tan trench coat. Blue tie. Ruffled hair. "I wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Yeah. I'm good." Dean sat up straight, and Cas settled next to him, on the edge of the bench, as if he were afraid he was not welcome.

"It's cold out here, Dean. You don't have a jacket." Cas slipped his own coat off his shoulders and threw it over Dean. "Please come back to the motel. Sam is very upset."

"He's just throwing another bitch fit." Dean scoffed, pulling Cas coat tighter around his body and breathing in Cas' scent, which calmed him.

"I understand how he feels. He is thinking about you. He's worried that I will hurt you again." Cas shifted. "He's thinking with his heart."

Dean was silent, hunched over under the tan coat.

When he didn't reply, Cas stood, holding out a hand. "Please Dean. I will leave and you two can talk."

After a moment that felt like a month to the angel, Dean took his hand and Cas pulled him up. He was quiet for the walk back to the motel, but held onto Cas' hand tightly. The angel made sense, but Sam should know by now that Castiel was harmless. Nevertheless, Dean decided to take Cas' advice and 'talk'.

Cas left him at the motel door, and when Dean turned around, he was gone.

Sam was sitting on the couch, watching TV. His expression was plastered with one of his famous bitch faces. Dean sat next to him, and Sam moved away toward the other end of the couch. Dean saw with guilt that Sam had a swelling bruise on his cheek.

"Whad' you do, steal the coat?" Sam commented on the trenchcoat still around Dean's shoulder.

"No. Cas gave it to me because it was cold." Dean said, trying to keep his voice even. "Can you turn the TV off? We need to talk."

"Oh, now you want to talk." Sam flipped the TV off and threw the remote. "After you had a little session with your huggy bear."

"Shut up." Dean flushed, but then remembered he was supposed to be apologizing. "I need to talk to you."

"About what?" Sam snapped. Honestly, he didn't want to deal with this anymore. If Dean wanted to be a thick-headed ass, then so be it.

"Look, I know you're still mad about what happened, and you don't trust Cas," Dean started and Sam interrupted, "Neither should you,"

"But," Dean continued as if Sam hadn't spoken. "He is my mate. I love him. You don't have to, but don't put him down for a mistake he made."

"A mistake that could have been prevented." Sam snorted.

"Like starting the Apocalypse?" Dean suggested quietly, and Sam narrowed his eyes.

"You can't compare that-"

"Why not?" Dean looked up at his brother's furious face. "If you came to me-"

"Shut up. I don't want to hear this." Sam tried to stand up, but Dean grabbed his arm to stop him.

"Sammy, please." Perhaps it was the pleading in Dean's voice that made Sam sit back down, or the use of his nickname, or the way Dean looked, like he really needed Sam to understand. "Just listen."

Sam nodded reluctantly, and Dean let go of his arm. "I know you think he's a horrible person, but think of before. We were all friends, Sammy. Now Cas and I are just closer. That terrible thing that happened was good in a way. I finally found someone to share my life with, Sam. Someone who understands and can deal with all this hunting crap. I love Castiel.; it won't change anything if you don't accept it. But it will make things a hell of alot easier for me if you just got along with him. He doesn't do anything to you or say anything, so please, leave him alone."

Sam regarded Dean for a moment, the anxiety in his voice bothering him. "Fine. But for you. Not for him. Only for you."

"Thank you, Sammy." Dean did it without thinking; he threw his arms around his brother and they embraced in one of those sincere Winchester hugs they saved for serious situations.

"Go call your mate, then. Bring him back." Sam said quietly, and turned the TV back on. "Grab me a beer on the way back, will you?"

Dean grinned, his heart so much lighter now that they talked. When he opened the motel door, Cas was standing there, waiting for him, looking bare without his trenchcoat. Dean motioned him inside. "We're good, Cas."

Cas glanced over to the couch, and Sam gave him a nod. It wasn't a warm or friendly gesture, but it was an accepting one. Cas smiled at Sam, and he turned back to the TV.

"He'll warm up." Dean touched Cas' arm. "I promise."

Cas touched Dean's cheek lightly, hoping that Sam did, for Dean's sake.

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