Once upon a time, he was her king and she his queen. He would grant her those small, loving smiles that no one else got to see, would speak endlessly for her if she wished it, though she never did. She was always content with his silence, content to be the voice for the both of them.
He was her knight with a shining blade, and no amount of blood could ever dull its edge or his love for her.
And then came the change. Suddenly there were rumors of the Shinsengumi killing their own members in the streets. There were flashes of white hair and blood-red eyes that she'd see during the night. There were ominous cacklings that disturbed her sleep.
And he was not there.
Suddenly he was gone from her life, paperwork and secret missions she was not allowed to know about taking him away from her. She would see him during the day, face pale and a small frown on his face. She could tell he was in pain from something.
He would deny her any attempt to get close again, stuttering out some excuse that she could easily see through. She did not know why he drew away from her, did not know why he always looked like he was in pain during the day, and did not know why there were nights she'd hear him containing screams of pain. She could not help, and it seemed he did not want her help.
The silence that stretched between the two of them now was long and unbearable, and their shattered relationship tasted bitter upon their tongues.
((Saitou thought it was much like swallowing the Water of Life, and though he wished it, he could not tell her about any of this.))