"Ms. Elizabeth! Look! This would look great on you!"

"Really? You think so, Cream?"

"Yep!"

"Hey, Matt, what to you think?"

"Zzz... Mph... Wha?..."

I snapped out of my partially-asleep state and glanced for a moment at Liz, who was now wearing a pearl necklace.

"Yeah, whatever, it looks great..." I mumbled, slowly drifting off again, "It's your money..."

I was promptly brought back to the realm of reality with a whack upside the head, courtesy of Liz.

"What!?" I sputtered, shaking whatever sense of drowsiness I had left out of my head, "I'm a guy! I don't know anything about jewelry!"

"You could at least pretend you're interested!" Liz insisted, "Sheesh, boys..."

As the two girls turned back to their bling, I let out a low growl. We had spent the last three freakin' hours in one freakin' store in Station Square's shopping district, and I was on the verge of going insane. At first, I stupidly figured the whole ordeal might not be so bad. After all, furries have fur (duh), so most of them use that alone as covering, like Sonic himself (and Sally in SatAM, much to the chagrin of a few conservative folks). If that's the case, then clothes shopping and such couldn't be that bad, right?

Wrong.

Turns out, women anthros sill like their clothes. Not only that, but things are actually more complicated for them. It's not just a case of "Does this make me look fat?" anymore, oh no. Instead, while trudging through aisles and aisles of shirts, dresses, and jeans, I heard things such as "This dress totally clashes with my fur color!" and "I like these pants, but they were made for birds..." and other crazy things like that. Liz promptly followed suit, and I found myself having to carry numerous articles of clothing to the cashier and asking "Does this come in lizard sizes?" Eventually, Liz got a purple, low-cut tee and a pair of baggy jeans, Cream got a little light-blue dress, and I got an ulcer.

Next stop was the 'Accessories' section of the store. Apparently, this was where'd they keep things like the gloves and shoes and junk that Sonic characters wear. We spend a mercifully short amount of time in here, thank God, but the girls kept insisting on my opinion on whether or not this pair of gloves or that pair was better, to which I gave the oh-so-familiar reply of "Whichever one's cheaper." They ultimately decided to blow me off completely and get a little bit of everything. I had to admit, though, Cream did look cute (in a little kid way, sickos!) wearing her accessories, which mostly consisted of two pink bows she had tied to each ear.

And then there was the cosmetics department.

I swear, if community showers are the first ring of Hell, then this was the second. Not only did poor, naive Cream get suckered into one of those 'Free Makeovers' they're always hawking at such places and eventually wound up looking like a furry Bratz doll (Liz quickly took her to the restroom to wash it all off, thank goodness), but one of the salespeople (salesanimal?) actually had the gall to try and sell cosmetic products to me!

I kid you not. Even I couldn't believe it.

"Excuse me?" I remember saying, staring in disbelief at the cosmetics lady who addressed me.

"Well, if we can find the right foundation for you," the overly-enthusiastic cat in front of me continued, seemingly oblivious to my gaping mouth, "then a heavily-applied eyeliner would do wonders for your image! You would truly look like a vicious, yet fashionable, creature of the night!"

Very awkward silence.

"Look..." I began, slowly backing away, "I appreciate your concern, but I think I'd rather not have to question my masculinity, thanks."

Without waiting for a reply, I ran off, trying to find Liz and Cream. Thankfully, they were still in the bathroom at this time, so I was the sole witness to this horrifying experience. Thank heaven; the last thing I needed was people knowing about that exchange.

So let's review: I got dragged on a shopping trip with two girls, spent God knows how long convincing Liz that some random article of clothing matched her scales' texture, had to calm Cream down when a pair of shoes she loved didn't come in her size, and was told by a complete stranger that I should start wearing make-up.

Oh, and I had to carry all the bags, too.

While I continued to fume over the excruciating pain I had experienced in the past few hours (and Liz's general apathy towards it), I felt something land on my head. Looking up, I found myself eyeball-to-eyeball with Cheese.

"What? You bored too?" I asked.

"Chao! Chao! Chao chao chao!" Cheese barked at me, glaring.

"Huh? What's he saying?"

"I told him to keep an eye on you," Liz explained, not even looking away from the jewelry displays, "if you start dozing off again, he'll give that little ponytail of yours a sharp tug."

To prove his point, Cheese promptly grabbed my ponytail and started pulling on it gently.

"Oh great, so you're on their side, too?" I grumbled, "And you're not a dark chao... how?"

"Chao!" was all he said, grinning all the while. Jerk.

While I was busy being threatened by something one-tenth of my size, Liz showed Cream a pair of earrings.

"Hey Cream, I think these would look good on you, especially with that new dress you got!"

"Really?" Cream replied, "Thank you!... But Mother won't let me get pierced ears. She says they turn your ears green."

I let out a quiet snicker. While I never got that whole 'green ears' myth people always talk about when it comes to ear piercing, the thought of Cream with such was highly amusing.

"Oh..." Liz sighed, "Well, I certainly don't want you to disobey your mom."

"Hey, about that green ears thing," I joked, "I suppose you wouldn't have to worry about that, right Liz? Heh heh..."

I was expecting her to either laugh or kick me in the balls (I was certainly hoping for the former). However, she did neither. Instead, she looked back at the earrings for a minute before simply walking off.

"Uh? Liz? Wait, it was a joke!"

"Chao..."

I felt Cheese grab my hair again.

"Hey, come on now, Cheese! I was trying to be funny!" I begged, "I mean, she already has green ears, right? Being a lizard and all? So, I figured..."

YANK!

"GAH!" I shouted, my head snapping back as Cheese pulled on my ponytail, "Cream! Tell your chao to stop torturing me!"

"Cheese!" Cream ordered, "Stop hurting Mr. Mathew! It's not very nice!"

"Chao, chao..."

Cheese flew off my head, looking at me with a sad face as if to pander some sympathy from me. What a ham.

Ah well, it's hard to stay mad at something that looks so darn cute.

"Aw... Hey, Cheese, it's alright..." I forgave, patting him on the head, "Just listen to what Cream tells you and not Liz, okay?"

"Chao! Chao!"

A short while later Liz returned, and I immediately did a double take when I saw her. Now, hanging from her ears, was the pair of earrings she had shown to Cream

"Wait a second..." I stammered, "Liz, did you just..."

"Get my ears pierced? Yep," she answered, flicking one of the earrings and letting it swing back a forward, "they had one of those booths over there where they'd do it for free if you buy a pair of earrings. How do they look?"

I hadn't been paying much attention to the earrings when she was showing them to Cream (I was still busy glaring at the little blue ball of doom that was nesting on my head at that time), so I took a moment to look at them now. They were those dangly kind, made up of a 'chain' of small, sky-blue gems that went down to about her chin. Actually, they looked pretty good on her; the blue gems went nice with the color of her scales.

Hold on... Did I just actually judge how well to colors went together?

Okay, now I know I've been hanging around with these two for waaaaay too long. Where's Nate or Shaun or any of the other kids when you needed them?

On second thought, I don't think I would want any of them seeing me in this situation. It would probably do more harm to my masculinity than good.

"Wow, they look beautiful on you, Ms. Elizabeth!" Cream gasped, quickly jarring me out of my thought process, "What do you think, Mr. Mathew?"

"Oh... Erm... They look great!" I complimented, smiling weakly and giving a pair of thumbs-up, "But... Uh... Why'd you do it?"

Liz just shrugged.

"Why not?"

Guys of the world, take note: I have seen women on a shopping trip, and it is weird.

I was glad to finally hear the noise of the city streets again instead of the horrendously awful elevator music that was playing inside the huge clothing store. As the three of us walked (and one flew) around, looking for another place to blow all our rings on, I took in all the sights and sounds surrounding me. Although I lived in a suburb growing up, we hardly ever went into the city when I was a kid. When we did, though, it was always a dazzlement to my senses. On one hand, the loud noises and not-so-pleasant smells often left me dazed and confused, but the sheer vastness of it all would simply leave me in awestruck wonderment. I usually preferred the country over the city, but I would still be amazed by it all if it was impressive enough.

Needless to say, Station Square was that kind of city.

I basked in everything my senses (now amplified from being a wolf) picked up: The sounds of cars driving by and radio music pouring out of store windows, the smells of hot dogs and pretzels being cooked by streetside vendors, the visual impact of staring at the top of a skyscraper you're right at the bottom of, the dull sense of pain as you drag about ten bags worth of junk for your 'friends' who are too lazy to carry them themselves... Well, okay, I am quite glad to admit that I'm making up that last one. Liz had the heart to actually let us stop by the hotel after visiting the department store so that we could drop off all the bags, freeing me from that last item on the list. Good thing, too: if we hadn't, I think my arms would've fallen off by now.

As it turns out, Station Square's shopping district was a good five-blocks-by-five-blocks smack-dab in the middle of the city. Furthermore, the way things were arranged in the district was a bit interesting. For some reason, all the stores were pretty much grouped together based on what they were selling, so all the clothing stores were in one place, all the electronics stores were in another, and all the restaurants were basically in a block-sized food court. It was convenient, I admit, but it just didn't seem like a good business strategy to me. I could picture the executives talking now: "Well, where should we put our new store?" "Gee, how about right with all the other stores that are exactly like it!" "Shouldn't we try to put it somewhere different, so there's less competition?" "Shut up! You don't know what you're talkin' about! My idea's brilliant!"

Okay... That's generally a good sign that you're thinking too much: Your internal monologue has multiple voices.

Where was I? Oh yeah, the shopping district... Anyway, while having everything together would logically make finding what you're looking for much easier, we were still having a hard time finding our way around. I guess that was because none of us thought about brining a map along, leaving us to just blindly walk around and hope we'd run into what we were searching for. It wasn't a very good strategy, in case you couldn't tell.

"Hey, Matt," Liz asked, pointing around the corner, "you wanna see what's down this street?"

"Sure, why the heck not?" I sighed, "After what you dragged me through in that clothing store, I don't think anything we could go in could possibly be worse."

Liz, Cream, and Cheese walked and/or flew around the corner. I quickly followed suit and discovered, much to my regret, that things could get worse... Much worse.

I suppose the first sign came before I even fully rounded the corner. My sensitive nose began picking up the combined smell of various perfumes, lotions, and soaps coming from the next street. However, I shook it off and turned to my right to see what was down this new avenue. What I saw terrified me. Seriously, no single ring of Hell could possibly hold what was here. This had to be at least the third and forth rings combined, maybe even the fifth.

The entire street was made up of beauty salons and spas.

Liz and Cream had big smiles on their faces, I had a look on my face not unlike that of someone facing a firing squad.

"Okay, you know what?..." I began, slowly sneaking away, "I'm gonna go check out somewhere else now. If you need me..."

Liz immediately reached out and grabbed me by my ponytail, holding me in place.

Since when did my ponytail suddenly start shouting "Grab me!" anyway? First Cheese, now Liz... This could be a problem.

"Where are you going, Matt?" she asked slyly, "You agreed to stay with us the entire time, remember?"

Oh great... She actually was gonna drag me through this Hell-on-earth boulevard? That's it. All my manhood is gone. God, if you're listening, please kill me now.

As I was dragged down the street like a prisoner being taken to the gallows, I glanced into the shop windows, morbidly curious as to how furry beauty treatments differed from human ones. I didn't gather much from what was actually going on inside, but signs in the windows advertised such things as 'paw manicures/pedicures' (I guess your victims might as well see how fashionable your claws were before you slashed their throats with them), 'full body coloring and highlights' (so a leopard can change his spots, then?), and 'fur waxing' (ow... Just... OW!!!).

Needless to say, my impression of this place wasn't going up any.

"Um, Liz..." I began absentmindedly, trying to think of something to talk about to divert my attention from the horrors surrounding me, "Why are we here, exactly? You thinking about getting a haircut or something?"

It was when Liz turned and began glaring daggers at me that I realized my mistake: She was a lizard. She had no hair.

"Oh... Right..." I muttered, realization hitting me like a 2-by-4.

I reflexively reached down and began guarding my crotch. After seeing what she did to poor Shaun (after he brought up a quirk about her species, no less), I knew that look meant a shot to the 'nads was inevitable.

It's kinda funny, really. One minute, Liz is gleefully getting her girl on with Cream; the next, she's giving me such a stare-down that I resort to guarding my manhood. I was tempted sometimes to think that she might have been bi-polar or something, but when I look back, I know that wasn't the case. That was simply her personality: she loved her girly stuff as much as the next female, but she also could be as much of a tomboy as she wanted to be, and considering that she spent about 90 percent of her time around a huge group of guys, that happened to be a lot.

But I digress; let's go back to me hunching over to protect what I hold near and dear to me, shall we?

"Matt..." Liz grumbled, folding her arms and looking at me cowering in fear, "I'm not gonna kick you in the balls."

"Oh... Really?" I asked, slowly letting my guard down.

"Nah, I'd rather not humiliate you that much in public," she replied, giving me a little smile and turning back down the street, "I like ya too much."

Sometimes, I think she just glares at us like that to mess with our minds. Heaven knows it works.

Although the conversation ended with that (thank goodness), I noticed that she seemed a little sadder after my unintentional jibe at her. Even Cream caught it.

"Are you okay, Ms. Elizabeth?" Cream asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine... It's just that Mr. Tactful over there," she glanced at me with a playful smirk, "brought up a point I was kinda trying to ignore. Sigh... I guess us lizards can't get pampered much..."

She looked down at her scaly body, which, incredibly enough, was still rather chapped from that village fire so long ago (the real one, not that crazy dream one I had the pseudo-flashback about). I still remembered from before that time, when her scales were so shiny that they reflected the sunlight, but ever since that fire, they were dull and flaky. She never stuck me as the type concerned about their self-image, but I guess anyone would be a bit embarrassed if they were walking about looking like a bad sunburn victim all the time. The fact that none of the places offered any services to lizards probably didn't help matters, either.

However, as we continued to walk, we heard someone call out to us from one of the storefronts... Or, more specifically, Liz.

"Excuse me! Ms! Could I have a moment?"

I growled. Oh great, another salesperson. These people already got on my nerves even before I wound up on Mobius (granted, though, they never offered me cosmetics back then). For some mind-numbing reason, there was an unholy amount of them running kiosks in the middle of my local mall, selling everything from jewelry to those copyright-infringing '1000-in-1' game systems. The worst of the lot, however, were the ones selling hand lotions. They would call out to you and, if you did so much as look at them, they would drag you over to their little display center and start giving you about ten gazillion lotion samples. The thing I really didn't get about them, however, was the fact that they gave the same pitch to both men and women. Seriously, is any guy really gonna let some fruitcake rub lotion on their hands? I think not.

At any rate, Liz turned to face the person who was addressing her while I let out a sigh of relief that at least they weren't talking to me. That lady in the cosmetics department was enough, thanks.

The person talking to Liz was, much to my surprise, another female lizard. She seemed Asian in appearance and was wearing a kimono. I guess it made sense when considering where she was working, though: the store right behind her had a distinctive oriental motif to it.

"Forgive me," the sales... lizard?... apologized, bowing for a moment before continuing, "but I couldn't help but overhear your lament that there are very few places that offer services for lizards, is that correct?"

"Uh... I guess..." Liz shrugged, unsure as to where this was going, "I take it that you're an exception?"

"Precisely. Here at Scales: A Reptile Spa, we specialize in treatments specifically designed for reptiles, such as spine styling and scale exfoliation."

"Really? Well..." Liz pondered, once again looking down at her flaky scales, "I guess that might be good for me..."

Now, I don't know about you, but when the word 'exfoliation' shows up in a conversation, that's usually a good sign that I should withdraw from said conversation.

"Look, I'm sure whatever the heck you're talking about is fascinating..." I began, once more trying to back away, "But, you see, I have no interest in such things for obvious reasons, so if you'll excuse me..."

However, Liz reached out and grabbed me again (this time by the arm instead of the ponytail, thankfully), holding me in place.

"Matt? Do you think this would be worth it?" she asked, pointing to the spa.

"How should I know!?" I protested, "I'm a guy!"

Liz let out an agitated groan before turning back to the other lizard.

"Okay, I'll do it."

"Very good. However..." the lizard replied, pointing specifically to Cream and Cheese, "No one under the age of thirteen is allowed in the spa."

I suddenly felt three pairs of eyes fall on me.

"I take it that means I have to take care of Cream and Cheese for a while?" I concluded.

"Yep..." Liz answered, "You don't mind, do you Cream?"

"Not at all, Ms. Elizabeth!" Cream assured, "I would love to spend some time with Mr. Mathew!"

"Chao! Chao!" Cheese agreed.

"You fine with it, Matt?"

"I guess I'll have to be..." I shrugged, "Don't worry about me taking care of them. You go do... Whatever you girls do in a spa. I dunno."

"Thanks," Liz answered, entering the spa, "see you guys in a little while!"

"Bye, Ms. Elizabeth!"

"Chao!"

"See ya!"

As soon as she was gone, Cream and Cheese turned to me.

"Where do you want to go, Mr. Mathew?"

I quickly grabbed Cream by the arm.

"I really don't care..." I replied, "... As long as it's NOT HERE!!!"

I blasted out of that nightmare of a city block at near max speed, abusing my power a bit too much and probably plowing over a few innocent bystanders in my mad dash outta there. It made little difference to me at the time, though: I was finally free from the ridiculous amount of estrogen that was practically oozing out of the stores and onto the street. Now, I could finally look for some more manly things to blow my rings on.

As I slowed my pace back down (mostly to keep poor Cream's arm from getting ripped out of her socket), I took a look at my surroundings to see where I should go next. After all, the letter said that we were supposed to stock up on supplies while we were here, and somehow I don't think any of the things Liz and Cream brought thus far would qualify as such. While the temptation was great to walk over to the electronics stores to see what Mobius' equivalent to a Wii was, I knew there were a lot more important things to buy... But what, exactly?

Well, the letter said something about weapons, if I recalled correctly. Since I was pretty much defenseless (although one might argue that I was my own weapon when I went psycho), I knew that was a problem I had to fix.

As luck would have it, we had just rounded a corner and found ourselves in the street that was devoted entirely to adventuring equipment which, yes, included weapons. Think Cabela's, only without the ridiculous amount of real estate those stores take up.

"Mr. Mathew?" Cream asked as I led her down the street, looking in the store windows to see what stuff they had on sale, "Why are we here?"

"Well, that letter said that we should use the rings to buy weapons, right?" I replied, "I think this is where one would do that."

"But... Weapons hurt people... Why would you want to hurt someone?"

"Chao, chao..." Cheese agreed.

I looked at the little rabbit, glancing up at me with an appearance of pure innocence. How was I going to explain this to her? Despite all the crazy adventures she's gone on, she still thinks this world is peaceful enough to avoid conflict? I needed something to fight with, but Cream's innocent stare almost completely talked me out of it.

"Look, Cream..." I explained, putting a hand on her shoulder, "Remember how Sleet and Dingo almost killed us with that huge tank o' doom? The world isn't a safe place; you should know that from all that time you've spent with Sonic. That's why I need something to fight with, like how Amy uses her hammer, right?"

"Yes, but... Ms. Amy only uses her hammer to fight those nasty robots. The kind of weapons they have here are used to hurt people... To... To kill them."

Cream hung her head low and began to sob quietly. For those of you keeping track at home, this is the second time that I made Cream cry. I'm pretty sure Satan has a special spot reserved for me in Hell now; it probably looks just like that stupid hair salon street.

In all seriousness, though, I practically felt my heart break as I watched Cream choke up, Cheese flying right beside her to comfort her. Truth be told, part of the reason I wanted a weapon was in an effort to hopefully save some lives. I knew that it was only a matter of time before that animal within me would wind up killing someone, but I felt that it only came out in times of desperation, as if to keep to the old adage that an animal is most dangerous when it's cornered. However, most of those desperate moments came because I found myself unable to fight otherwise. Maybe, just maybe, if I had a weapon, I wouldn't feel as desperate, and thus I wouldn't give into my primal side. It sounds, crazy, I know, but maybe crazy enough to actually work.

However, I couldn't explain any of this to Cream. In her childhood-innocence she saw weapons only as things that ol' Eggman brought out to hurt everyone on Mobius. How could I explain to her that it was the lesser of two evils?

"Cream..." I vowed, getting on one knee to be eye-level with her, "I promise you that I will never use a weapon to kill a person. Whatever I ultimately get my hands on I'll use like Amy uses her hammer: to smash robots and fend off would-be attackers. That's it. No lives will be lost at my hand."

"R... Really?"

"Yep. You have my word."

In reality, this was also a promise I made to myself, one that I was honestly terrified I might break. Even if could keep my bestial side in check, even if I used my weapon solely for self-defense, could I make it though all this without killing someone?

I certainly hoped I could, for both Cream's sake and mine.

"Well, now that that's settled," I began getting back up on my feet and trying to bring back a more upbeat attitude after that 'angst moment', "I won't be able to do much of anything if I don't get a weapon in the first place, right? Come one, Cream, let's go."

"Sure thing, Mr. Mathew!"

"Chao! Chao!"

Since any store seemed as good as the next, I simply picked one shop out at random and marched in. As we walked though the door, a simple bell over the doorframe chimed to announce our entrance, although, judging from all the workshop-like noise coming from the back of the store, I wondered if anyone heard it. At the moment, all I could hear was the sound of a buzz saw tearing through metal reverberating throughout the room; a none-too-pleasant noise, especially when you have super-sensitive ears. Eventually, though, the commotion stopped and I heard a voice come out from the back room.

"Uh... Hold on guys, I'm coming!"

A few moments later, the owner of the voice came through the back door into the main section of the store. Upon seeing him, I recognized who it was immediately. After all, there aren't many large, purple walruses that wear a yellow baseball cap and have a knack for mechanics/weaponry in the Sonic universe, now is there?

"Sorry for the holdup there," he apologized, adjusting his cap and cleaning his paw off with a rag before holding out to us, "the name's Rotor. How can I help you?"

Author's Note: Originally, there was going to be more to this chapter, but I soon discovered that, between Matt's internal monologue and the sheer mass of stuff that was happening, I had to split the chapter in two 'cuz it was getting much too long. It's not a problem to me, but some of you might be looking foward to the next BIG ACTION SCENE since I've gone two chapters without one. I was hoping I could fit everything into this chapter since I have such a scene coming up after this, but that was not to be. Just sit tight; there's only one more chapter after this before things start to really heat up!