Chapter Ten

Numb

I can't stay here.

The Doctor leaned on the sandy coloured railing with his forearms crossed and stared across the beautiful horizon of Gallifrey. This was the exact same spot he used to stand at when he was younger. A lot younger. Before he was even taken as a Time Lord. He used to stand on this balcony and wish he could get his very own TARDIS and leave. He wanted to leave so badly back then. Now all he wanted was to return.

Ironic, really.

He took in a deep breath, running his fingers through his hair and then exhaled loudly. He knew fine well that he could unplug himself at any time. He couldn't explain it, but he just automatically knew he could after about twenty-four hours. He assumed it was because it was safe for him to leave. His brain had become adapted, if you will. But for some reason, he hadn't unplugged.

He wasn't even sure why.

He had spoken to Rose for a long time. It was frightening how real she was. At one point, he had actually became convinced that it was the real her. She spoke the same, acted the same, smelled the same. So did everyone else. Eventually he had to leave to be alone. He couldn't think straight when he was with them all. When he was with them, he didn't want to leave.

But he had to leave.

Do I? Really?

'Stop that,' he scolded himself. 'Stop that right now.'

But really… All those years of travelling through time and space, a lot of the time alone… He was getting older, and he was getting weary. He wasn't getting tired of it, no way would he ever be able to get tired of travelling, but…

He rested his head on his forearms and stared down at his dusty converse.

It would be nice to rest. Perhaps even just for a little while.

Just a little while.

Ashley glanced up as Mitchell came through the door backwards, pulling along a trolley packed with machines and wires. He glanced at her once and half smiled nervously, and then wheeled the trolley to the bed. She let go of the Doctor's hand and sat on the edge of the bed.

'Is that everything?' she asked, looking dubious.

'Yeah.' Mitchell replied. 'It'll take me about five minutes or so to set up.' He lifted the wires up and put them on the bed. 'Are you sure you want to do this?'

Ashley swallowed and nodded. 'Yeah. Yeah I think I'm sure.'

Mitchell half smiled. 'You think you're sure? That doesn't sound too sure to me.'

'I mean I am. I'm sure.' Ashley smiled weakly. 'At least I think I'm sure.'

Mitchell sighed and sat down beside her on the bed. 'I can do this for you.' He told her. 'If I just remind him of the way he reacted to Mr Cartwright then he'll unplug right away. If he's the person you said he is, he probably won't even hesitate. Maybe he doesn't know he can unplug himself?'

Ashley tilted her head at the possibility. 'I don't know. He seems to know things…'

Mitchell put an arm around her shoulder and gave her a brief squeeze. 'It'll turn out fine. You'll see. I'll go in for you.'

'No. I'm going.' She looked up at him and smiled lazily. 'Because if something goes wrong on this end, well… I'll probably panic, and if I panic, things get broken. And recently, things get burned.'

Mitchell nodded. 'Okay then.'

He looked at her for a little too long, and Ashley had to look away. She stood, moving out of his arm and stood over the machine. 'So are you going to hook me up?' She paused and winced. 'That makes me sound like a drug addict.'

Mitchell didn't react to her comment. He stood and nodded. 'Just lie down. The main wire is pretty uncomfortable, and it can be a little painful, but it doesn't last very long.'

Ashley grimaced. 'I'm not good with pain.'

'I'll try and be gentle.'

Ashley took in a deep breath, and let it out sharply. She did her Rocky shoulders, and then went to the bed. She hesitated. 'God I don't think I've ever been so nervous to get into a bed. I usually like lying down. It means less standing and less… doing things.' She glanced to Mitchell, who was looking at her curiously. She waved a hand dismissively. 'Ignore me. I ramble when I'm freaked out. I ramble a ridiculous amount actually. My housemate hates it because if there's a moth… I hate moths by the way… if there's a moth in the bathroom I just stand outside and ramble until someone goes into get it. I was the same at school too. This one time I had to stand up in assembly and…'

'Ashley?' Mitchell smirked, amused. 'Shut up and lie down please.'

She blinked at him. 'Oh right.' She got onto the bed. 'Sorry.'

As soon as she lay down, her stomach began churning. Nothing was there to churn of course; she hadn't eaten since 14,000 BC. Oh no, she'd eaten a full packet of custard creams at home. Still, it wasn't much. She turned her head and looked to the Doctor. Still as ever. She took his hand and held it tight.

'Go on then.' she told Mitchell.

Mitchell nodded. Out of the corner of her eye she saw him pick up the needle. He wiped it with something, and then turned to her. He hesitated.

Annoyed, Ashley gritted her teeth. 'Bloody get on with it will you? I don't fancy you doing the 'will I won't I' with the brain needle.'

'Sorry,' Mitchell replied. 'It's just… I just wanted to say…'

'Tell me when I come out.' Ashley replied, closing her eyes. 'Get on with it you soft-arse.'

For a moment she didn't think he was going to do it. She opened her mouth to tell him to get on with it when she felt a sharp pain in her temple. Her eyes shot open and she let out a cry. It felt like she was getting an electric shock. And not just any electric shock… this was a full-blown eye popper. Her back arched off the bed and she squeezed the Doctor's hand as hard as she could.

The ceiling she stared up at seemed to get further away. Her body became stiff and rigid and numb. Then everything faded to green, and she stopped screaming.