'I'm here to pick up Shizuo.'

Izaya forced a grin and stepped to the side, allowing Celty to brush past him. She stopped in the hallway, looking around.

'I'm impressed. Your apartment's intact.' She typed out.

"Almost." Izaya laughed, leading her into the living room. "He kind of killed my coffee-table."

'Oh?' Celty bent down, examining the mess. She shifted through the remains, holding up a shard of glass. She tilted it slightly, watching the light reflect. 'Did he do it in anger?'

"More like a panic attack." Izaya yawned, stretching. "Woke me up in the middle of the night."

Celty ignored him, standing up to look at Shizuo who was staring at her in awe. She hesitantly extended her hand in greeting, watching for the blonde's reaction. Shizuo tensed, leaning away. Celty quickly retracted her hand, taking a cautionary step back. Izaya sighed, giving Shizuo an exasperated look.

"Calm down." Izaya said, sitting down on the couch. "She's not going to do anything." Shizuo nodded once, slightly relaxing his shoulders. He leaned against Izaya, who absently ruffled his hair as he thumbed through a stray folder. Celty watched them, dumbfounded. A fake cough interrupted her thoughts, forcing her to turn around.

Namie stood in the doorway, watching the others with mild disdain. She let her gaze rest on Celty for a bit before turning to Izaya. "I need to use your computer."

"Not now, Namie." Izaya said graciously, gesturing to Celty. "We have a guest."

"It won't take long." Namie said stiffly, refusing to look at Celty.

"The parental controls are a pain to set up." Izaya said dismissively.

"You could just type in your password." Namie snapped, a light blush tingeing her cheeks. Izaya laughed and covered his face with his hand.

"What, and let you have free reign over my files? Why don't I just sign my death warrant now?" he grinned, peeking through his fingers at the irritated woman. "I'll do it later, Namie."

"But-" she protested, halting when a screen suddenly appeared in front of her face.

'What's so important?'

Namie glared at Celty, pushing the phone away. "None of your business." She took a step back as another message was abruptly shoved in her face.

'I'm curious. Enlighten me.'

"I don't have time for this!" Namie snapped, turning on her heels. "I'll hack it myself!" Izaya sighed as she stormed out of the room. As if she could.

"Aren't I lucky, Shizuo?" he smiled, weaving his hands through the other's blond hair, "Two beautiful women are fighting over my attention." A sharp bark of laughter came from Namie's room. Izaya ignored her.

'Anyway,' Celty tapped out hesitantly, 'I need to get going...'

"Ah," Izaya said simply, nodding in understanding. He tilted his head to look at the blonde, who gazed at him questioningly. "Shizuo, you need to go with Celty. Shinra's going to take good care of you." He said soothingly, gently nudging the other's head off his shoulder.

Shizuo blinked at him, brow furrowing. Izaya rolled his eyes, pushing on Shizuo to get up. "C'mon." he urged. "I can't take care of you by myself. You need to go see Shinra." Shizuo frowned, a look of intense concentration crossing his face. Izaya sighed and picked up his plate, taking a bite of his cooling meal. "I don't think he's listening."

'If you think I'm stupid enough to try and force him to do anything, you're very wrong.' Celty typed.

Izaya huffed irritably, taking another bite. "Shizuo, will you just go?"

Shizuo gazed at Izaya numbly, who closed his eyes in irritation. Honestly… He was listening bef-

"Why?"

Izaya promptly sprayed eggs across the room, which Celty reflexively side-stepped. He turned to stare at Shizuo in shock, food dribbling down his chin. "What?" he said weakly.

Shizuo looked back at him, mouth opening and closing as he struggled to speak. "Why?" he said finally.

Celty thrust her phone at Izaya. 'You didn't tell me he could talk!'

"I didn't know!" Izaya protested, standing up. Celty and Izaya fixed their gazes upon Shizuo expectantly. The blonde looked back and forth between the two, expression pained.

"Well?" Izaya said expectantly after a few moments. Shizuo looked at his feet, silent. Celty cocked her helmet, thinking.

'Maybe that's all he can say?' she typed.

Izaya threw his hands up and collapsed on the couch. "Fine. Shizuo, just go with her already." The blonde stood up, giving Izaya a guilty look. Celty motioned towards the door, gently leading the other down the hall. Izaya silently watched them. He suddenly stood up, knocking his plate to the ground.

"Wait." He said, turning towards the kitchen. "I'll be right back."

Celty and Shizuo stood in the hall awkwardly as the minutes ticked by. Just as Celty was beginning to get fed up, Izaya returned, holding a small bag. He thrust the package into Shizuo's arms.

'What's that?'

"Never mind!" Izaya smiled awkwardly, pushing them out the door. "Have fun with Celty, Shizuo!" he grinned, slamming the door behind them.

Celty reached over and peeked into the bag. She shook her helmet, silent laughter bubbling up. Shizuo stared at her and looked inside the bag, confused. Celty waved her hand dismissively, beckoning the other to follow.

Milk bottles, huh?

Izaya breathed a sigh of relief as slid down the closed door. If he could talk, he should have said something earlier. What a pain… He pushed himself off the door, noticing Namie had re-entered the room. She gave him an amused look.

"I'm surprised at you."

"Oh?" Izaya smirked, arrogant mood returning.

Namie reached down to pick up a plate. "I can't believe you let him go like that."

"Of course you can't," Izaya said, spreading out his arms grandly, "Your feeble mind cannot begin to comprehend my benevolent nature."

Namie laughed shortly, tucking the plate under her arm. "Or maybe Shizuo just gave you one."

"Hm?" Izaya said, cocking his head.

"Well, maybe my mind is just being feeble," Namie said sarcastically, "But you've been acting a little off ever since you got your little toy. But I rather like this doting side of you. It almost makes up for the rest of your personality."

"How cruel," Izaya smiled, brushing past her. "I've been tolerating him, that's all."

"Still," Namie continued, unperturbed, "I don't see why you let him go. He could have been valuable."

"Oh? How so?" Izaya smirked, plopping down in front of his computer. Namie hovered over him, temper flaring.

"Don't mock me. You had Shizuo Heiwajima in the palm of your hand, and you did nothing. He even seemed fond of you, God knows why. The normal you would exploited that in a second." She snarled. Izaya smiled innocently up at her.

"My, my!" he laughed, "Did you have plans for Shizuo yourself?" Namie glared at him, fingers curling.

"Anyway," Izaya continued, turning away, "He's no good to me like this." Namie crossed her arms, looking down at him. "Why?"

Izaya sighed dramatically. "A broken toy is a useless toy. I'm not interested in taking care of damaged goods." He turned around to face Namie again. "If Shinra can help him, then fine. He could be useful. But not right now."

"What if Shinra completely fixes him?" Namie said quietly. "He's no good as his old self either." Izaya smiled to himself.

"Well," he grinned, "At least he'd be interesting again." He locked eyes with Namie, folding his arms.

Namie stared at him for a long time, before shrugging her shoulder and walking off.

"I thought you needed to use the computer." Izaya called after her.

"I'm fine." She said coolly, opening the front door. "I'll be back later." Izaya winced as she slammed the door behind her. He rolled his eyes and turned back to his computer.

Women.

AN: I know this chapter is shorter than the others, but it was a good place to stop. If I kept going, I would have ended up writing a 5,000 word chapter, and I know you don't want that. Or maybe you do.

I've also gotten a Livejournal for this piece, based on several threats from a friend towards my laptop if I didn't. Thus I am in the process of uploading chapters, and being very confused by that site. So, if for some reason you don't want to read this here, you can go on LJ. Or something.

The username is still vreee, (So just add in DOTlivejournalDOTcom after the name) and I'm still testing tags to try and make it search-able for you.