Disclaimer: Naruto is property of Masashi Kishimoto and Percy Jackson is property of Rick Riordan. I don't own this in anyway so please don't sue me.
Chapter 10: My Uncle is Not As Big a Jerk As everyone says he is
My first thought upon entering the underworld entrance was, 'Wow, this is the most depressing overwhelmingly boring, disappointment that it has ever been my misfortune to see.' It looked like a recording studio, the people however, were transparent, some looked new, others looked like they were there from the fifties, I saw some men in turbans. The security guards was a tall pale man, he had wrap around shades like Ares, he wore a crisp Italian suit, he had one of those earpieces that the secret service had and I saw he was flipping through a magazine while cheesy twenties music played from the speakers, we walked up to the desk and the man looked at us.
"Hi, we'd like to go to the underworld." I said and the man raised an eyebrow
"You would?" He said, "Well that's a switch."
"It is?"
"Yeah, I get 'Please don't let me be dead' or 'Please let me across for free' or 'There must be some mistake' or with those two gentlemen in the turbans 'Where were the 72 virgins I was promised?' yeah that was a shock to hear, how did you die young ones?"
"I got stretched to death by Procrustes." Grover moaned as his back still hurt,
"Oh, heard he was in town, wait, you're godlings?"
"Yeah, I got Procrustes but it was too late for my friend, I went swimming in the sea and bonked my head on the planks that were under the water, my friend drowned trying to pull me up." I said
"Well I suppose you don't have coins for passage, with adults we can charge your credit card, or add it onto your last cable bill but with children, you never die prepared, I suppose you have to wait for a few years."
"We've got passage." I pulled out the bag of drachma and stuck my hand in and let a rain of gold coins pour through my fingers
"Now I'll be damned, real gold Drachma I haven't seen these in…" His hand brushed my and I recoiled, "You're not dead!"
"Fuck it." I growled and activated my sharingan. "Obey." The man's eyes glazed over, "Takes us across the river."
"As you command, Charon shall obey,." he said in a monotone and he got up from the desk and we walked into the elevator, as the doors shut the elevator goes down and soon it felts like we're moving forward. Annabeth grabbed my hand and I blushed but understood what she was doing, she wanted to know that something else was alive in this boat. All around us people had changed into reaper robes and show had Changed, we heard the sound of a large animal howling. "Three face is hungry, too bad for you godlings." Charon said, I looked at him and he looked like the Grim reaper, "Looks like you're gonna be dead soon, good thing you're in the right place." Charon cackled Annabeth squeezed my hand and I looked at her
"We'll make it," I said looking into her yes, "We aren't going to die, we'll save the world." Annabeth blushed slightly and kissed me on the cheek which made me flush red
"Thanks, Percy." She said and then we departed the boat and started walking towards the gates of Erebus. I looked for Cerberus, the guard dog of Hades, a shadow , I saw spirits of the dead and even a priest that had smuggled thousands of dollars for m his charity and spent it on himself.
"It didn't have to be this way Madara!" A voice echoed in my head, the voice was unfamiliar to me
"Hashirama, I've already reach it!" Madara's voice responded but that wasn't my teacher it was an echo of the past.
"You're just an orphan what could the likes of you possibly know about losing your parents!?" a third voice called out
"I'll stop you from going to Orochimaru!" a fourth voice responded. "Even if I have to break every bone in your body and drag you back!"
"Focus," I muttered, "Block out the past, your name is Percy Jackson." the voices dimmed and vanished, we soon saw Cerberus and he was big, I mean really bight, the size of a two story building and he was
"A rottweiler, weird." Madara said
"Damn," I shouted. "What do they feed you?!" I asked Cerberus who growled and he looked at me.
"Uh. Percy." Grover whimpered. "He doesn't think that's funny, he also says we've got 10 seconds to pray to the God of Goddess of our choosing, and after that, well… he's hungry." I pulled out a wooden bedpost and waved it at Cerberus who looked at me with a clearly unamused face on his three faces.
"See the stick, see the stick." I said temptingly trying to appeal to Cerberus canine instincts. "FETCH!" I threw it and the stick splashed in the River Styx, Cerberus looked unimpressed.
"Sit!" Annabeth commanded to my left and I saw her holding a big rubber ball, Cerberus looked at Annabeth all three heads cocked to the side. "Sit." and amazingly Cerberus sat, squishing several spirits of the dead in the process. Annabeth tossed the ball and the middle head caught it and chewed on it happily wagging his tail, the other two heads snapped at the middle one wanting the new toy too. "Drop it." all three heads stopped and looked at Annabeth again, Cerberus listened, he dropped the ball which I had placed replenishing seals on to make sure if the stick failed the rubber ball would still work after rewarding Cerberus. I remember when Madara taught me Fuinjutsu, it was the hardest training I'd ever had because it involved the hardest thing for any Demigod to do…..SIT DOWN AND WRITE OVER AND OVER AGAIN! (Insert screams of Terror) Anyway I returned to the present and Annabeth whispered to us "The 'Ez Death' Line it's faster." I caught her meaning and Grover and I walked over, Cerberus went to go after us but Annabeth was cleverer. "Stay, if you want the ball, Stay." we walked to wards and under Cerberus who left us alone and we got in line, "Good boy." Annabeth tossed Cerberus the ball and the left head caught it and started chewing happily, the right head whined and I started feeling really bad for the poor dog he's sooo bored. We got to the metal detectors and Annabeth joined us, a whine cause us to turn around. Cerberus had done a 180 to look at us and he dropped the ball, "Poor Cerberus, they don't play with you all that much do they?" Cerberus whined. "I'm sorry, but I have to go but you can keep the ball and I'll talk to daddy about playing with you more often, would you like that?" Cerberus picked up the ball and wagged his tail and I didn't need to speak dog to know that he like the idea. We walked through the meal detectors which started blaring and flashing red lights 'Unauthorized possession, Magic detected!' I knew we had to get out of there fast
"Katon: Hijingakure no jutsu!" we bolted toward the Palace of Hades, the furies circle overhead and security ghouls ran past our hiding spot we sat there for a few minutes, my backpack weighed much more than before, I knew it wasn't from the cash as that was in my pocket dimension. "Guys, I think we've got mail." I took off the backpack and unzipped it showing the Master Bolt in there, Annabeth and I nodded I zipped the backpack and then I saw a stone tablet not too far from us, I looked at it and it looked like the one that Madara told me about, the same tablet carved by the Rikudo Sennin. I activated my sharingan and saw that this one was different, I looked at it closely and it said.
'If you are reading this then what I have desired has come to pass and The Uchiha clan has survived the extinction of the Shinobi world and the rise of the Earth itself.'
"We don't have the time to read that tablet in it's entirety," Madara said. "But we should take it with us." I used my eyes to draw the tablet into my pocket dimension and then we walked towards the place, I took out the cursed sneakers and they sprung to life, I let them go and they flew towards the entrance to Tartarus and we continued to the palace. I heard an angry roar echo from the cave and I knew that Kronos was pissed that we figured out his trick. When we reached the place we saw two US marines with RPG's stood at the door way and I saw violent forms of death depicted on the doors.
"Bet Hades doesn't have much trouble with door to door salesmen." I joked, the doors opened and the guards looked at us expectantly
"Guess that means Entre Vues." Annabeth said and we walked into Hades' palace, the palace was black and bronze with a glorious throne room and in the black throne sat The Lord of the Dead, my uncle, Hades. Of the three gods that I've encountered Hades seemed the most Godlike, he was 10 feet tall and radiated an Aura of Power that was hard to resist, I knelt at the feet of the throne, Annabeth and Grover followed my lead.
"Lord Hades," I said, I could feel his anger rolling off him, "I know you must be angry at seeing me and believe that I stole your Helm of Darkness and Zeus' Master Bolt but I didn't."
"How else would you know my Helm's disappearance the, Godling?" Hades countered, his voice was rich and controlled but I could hear the anger in his voice. "I didn't not broadcast it's theft, so how do you know?"
"I, Percy Jackson, swear on the River Styx that neither I, my companions, nor my father had anything to do with the theft of The Helm of Darkness or Zeus' Master Bolt." Thunder shook the place and nothing else happened, Hades' look of anger changed into shock and he sat forward in his throne.
"To make such an oath, you speak the truth, you really didn't steal my helm or the bolt, but if you didn't steal it then who did?"
"Luke Castellan, the son of Hermes." Annabeth said, "however he wasn't following the orders of any Olympian, he was following the orders of Kronos." Hades looked shocked
"When the Master Bolt and you helm were stolen Lord Zeus sent his sons and daughters to find Luke." I said, "It was Ares who found Luke, but then Kronos started whispering in Luke's ear and planted the Idea of a war between you, my dad, and Lord Zeus Luke told the Idea to Ares who got hooked on the idea. So ares took the objects of power and then took his time until I came along and he gave the the Master Bolt but it wasn't until we entered the underworld that we had the bolt as I previously had cash in the backpack. He still has the helm and wants to get all three of you mad at each other, if you killed me Dad would be bad at you for killing me, Lord Zeus would be mad at you for having his Master Bolt, Dad would be mad at Zeus for the accusation of being a thief."
"And I would be mad at my brothers because my Helm would still be missing." Hades Finished
"One the way to the underworld Annabeth and I thought of a plan that we'd like to get you in on. We return to the mortal realm and get Ares to reveal himself, then I dance with him for the helm."
"Dance?" Hades echoed confused.
"Oh sorry verbal tick." I rubbed the back of my head. "I mean fight, then I give your helm back to the furies and in exchange, you release my mom."
"Deal, but I want a binding Oath, swear on the River Styx to uphold your end and I will uphold mine, I swear on the River Styx."
"I swear on the River Styx that I will get your Helm of Darkness back and stop this war." Thunder boomed and our deal was set, Hades smiled
"I assume you have a way out of my realm." I nodded and I pulled out the three pearls showing them to Hades.
"Yeah, and could you promise to do something else?" Hades raised an eyebrow
"What is it you want?"
"Oh it's not for me, I would like it if you could play with Cerberus more often, he likes rubber balls and he gets bored." Hades sighs,
"If only I had the time, Godling, but I will see what I can do, Cerberus does need play time like any other dog, perhaps I will take the day off tomorrow and play with the poor dog." Then I handed Annabeth and Grover a pearl each an we smashed them at our feet, in a gust of sea air we were surrounded by milky white spheres and we rose up passing through the ceiling, soon we breached the surface of the sea consequently knocking a surfer off who yelled.
"Dude!" I saw a 12 foot Great White and I shouted
"Beat it!" Then I willed the currents to carry us back to shore, Ares was there on his Motorcycle the headlight turning the sand red while he straddled it.
"You were supposed to die in the underworld, punk." Ares said
"Yeah, yeah, so there would be a three way war between the big three," I rolled my eyes, "let's just skip to the part where we dance (FUCKING HADES MADARA I HATE YOU) over the Helm of Darkness." Ares laughed at me
"Sorry kid, not happening, you aren't on my level." Ares snapped his fingers and a boar burst from the sand and round on me
"Amaterasu." The pig burst into black flames and squealed in agony, a few seconds later it was ash, I looked at Ares with a smirk on my face. "SO going to hide behind another pet pig or do you want to face me like a man?" Ares' face turned the color of Pepperoni and flames danced from behind his glasses
"Watch it punk, you are asking to get turned into a rodent."
"Would save you from getting your godly hide whooped." I countered playing with Ares' emotions.
"Fine punk, how do you want to get smashed, classic or modern?" I cracked my neck dawning my armor and drawing riptide, "Fine, classic it is." his shotgun morphed into a double bladed sword with a skull and a ruby in the hilt.
"Percy," Annabeth said gaining my attention "don't do this, he's a god."
"He's a coward, and I always wanted to fight a god."
"At Least take this, reconciliation, Poseidon and Athena together." She placed her necklace with the college ring of her father around my neck and kissed my cheek, I blushed and Grover handed me a crushed tin can
"The satyrs stand behind you, Percy." Grover said, my eyes welled with tears
"Thanks, both of you." I said then drew my Gunbai and glared at Ares. "Well Ares….shall we dance?"
"My strength is unlimited, I've been fighting for Eons and I can't die, What have you got?" Ares taunted
"A multitude of weeks of combat experience of dancing with godlike foes and more than one." I dropped into my defensive stance, wordlessly Ares charged me, I could see the path of his sword and blocked with Gunbai then countered with my sword. Ares dodged and I tried to sweep his feet, Ares did a series of backflips and I closed the distance then sliced at Ares nicking him across the face, Ichor, the golden blood of the gods leaked from it but he disregarded it. "First blood goes to me, but this is a heck of a lot of fun."
"Arrogant little cockroach, aren't you? Ares slashed and I rolled under it, Ares kicked me across the beach. I crashed onto the ground with a 'thud' Ares went for the kill but I manifested my Susanoo blocking the attack, I got to my feet and attacked with renewed vigor, my Susanoo heading my commands giving Ares little room to maneuver, I could see the anger in his face as he tried to stab at me and all his attempts to harm me were countered. I heard to police cars pull up but I was too focus on Ares, I dropped my Susanoo and continued my onslaught of attacks.
"Those guys are armed!" I heard a cop call for backup, my attention shifted as I saw our duel was gathering an audience, Ares pressed the advantage and I was knocked back. Ares went in again but I used my Susanoo to weave signs,
"Katon: Goka Mekkyaku!" I exhaled a wave of flames which roasted Ares and I closed in slashing at Ares but he blocked and sliced my arm.
"Percy!" Annabeth shouted but thanks to Hashirama's healing prowess the wound closed, Ares laughed and I saw more cop cars,
"Drop the guns!" An officer shouted and I saw the blade in Ares' hand flicker from blade to shotgun and back.
"This is a private matter!" Ares shouted "Begone!" he waved his hand and a wave of flames erupted causing several cop cars to explode forcing the cops to dive for safety. "Now to add you to the barbecue little hero." Ares said a sick smile on his face, my vision went red and I felt my eyes sting, I held out my sword pointing it at Ares. I felt a tug in my gut and a water dragon forme from the sea then blasted Ares in the face blinding him. I charged in then stabbed him in the gut with my blade, then channeled chakra into it and my left eye twitched.
"Enton:" I said subconsciously, "Kagutsuchi!" The flames of the Amaterasu burst to life and Ares bellowed in pain, I withdrew my sword and kicked Ares in the face sending him flying towards the surf. Ares got to his feed desperately trying to extinguish the flames his pain still evident. "It's useless, the black flames don't go out unless I will them to or when their target is ashes." Ares growled at me, his face was enraged,
"You have made an enemy of me Godling." Ares growled again, I channeled more chakra into my left eye and more black flames burst to life, Ares roared in pain and advanced on him and smiled as the God of War writhed in agony.
"Give up, or the pain won't stop." I slashed his eye and Ares bellowed.
"Fine!" He shouted. "You win!" I extinguished the flames and Ares struggled to his feet, his skin was covered in third degree burns. Ares started cursing in Ancient Greek and he started glowing, "The next time you lift your blade and hope for victory you will feel my curse, Beware Perseus Jackson, beware." he started glowing
"Percy!" Annabeth shouted "Avert your eyes!" I did, somehow knowing that if I saw Ares' true divine form I'd be incinerated, with the glow died down Hades' Helm was on the beach. The furies landed on the beach and I held out the helm to the fury that used to be Mrs. Dodds who grabbed it.
"Return this to Lord Hades, with my compliments." I said to Mrs. Dodds and she cackled with sent a shiver down my spine.
"Become a true hero Percy Jackson," She said. "You have done Lord Hades a great service in exchange he is going to transport you and your friends to Olympus and to your camp respectively." as she finished I felt a hand place itself on my shoulder I turned to see Hades there and then we melted into the shadows.