Thank You, God, for everything.
DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own The Host or Divergent. He he he.
My head hurts. The caves are so full of twists and turns that we all would have gotten so easily lost if Jeb wasn't leading us. Tobias and I hang in the back of our group, watching Wanderer. Luckily for her, Maggie and Sharon take to the front with Jeb. The siblings talk in quiet, short tones as we make our way through the hallways.
It's almost like exploring an entirely new faction, a place you've never been that's a large part of people's lives.
The rushing water fountains in the bathing area gurgle and flow, like the water falling down into the chasm. It hits me hard how I miss the compound, but I ignore the feeling. They've cleaned that place up now. No more spots of paintballs everywhere.
I suppose there won't be any more suicide attempts at the chasm.
Jeb shows us the bedrooms, which there is a severe lack of.
"I was planning for us to do planting tomorra, but I'm game to start at carving rooms. Y'all can bunker down in the game room until then," Jeb says. He shows us the game room, which is large, about the size of a field. I take in the circles in the ceiling with the mirrors to see the light flashing down to the game room. It's an amazing idea.
Jeb talks proudly of his caves. He made it, he says. He must have a touch of Erudite in him. Along with Amity, him not letting Kyle get his hands on Wanderer. And Dauntless, walking around with that gun.
I would bet that Jeb is Divergent.
I feel them immediately. The stares. The stares full of human eyes and held in protests and anger. Hatred. Something I haven't seen from other beings in a while aside from my party.
The faces are set all about the kitchen; it's silent, except for Jeb's talking. He waves a hand over us, introduces us each in turn. Even Wanderer.
"A Soul?" a woman with a grey braid says.
"Yes, it's a Soul, Trudy. Wanderer, this is Trudy." Jeb points out a few men. "Aaron, Reid, Brandt, Geoffrey," and he continues around the kitchen. The place has a couple of tables. A large container of water. A large fire for an oven. It's dusty but clean. There's containers all stacked up in one corner.
Jeb turns to us and says, "Well, that's about everybody. Not too many of us. I guess you've nearly doubled us."
Jared somehow smiles at that.
Jeb smiles and says, "We've got a lot of chores around here. We've got the rooms to do and planting and kitchen duties. But don't any of y'all worry. We'll figure it all out." He turns to the kitchen. "Let's eat. I suppose I'll show y'all the hospital tomorrow."
He throws a look at Wanderer at that.
I wonder why.
We sleep in the game room. It's dirty amongst the blankets, but I get to stretch out my legs. I still need room, despite taking up the space of a child. Still, looking at Tobias's sleeping face, I wish there's more privacy. It's hard to talk to him when there's so many people around us.
His breathing is even, and he's so calm looking. It's eerily strange, to see him so quiet. His lips aren't set in a line, but are slightly curved at the edges. He has stubble all about his cheeks, framing the chin, making his cheekbones look softer.
He looks so old for being eighteen. He looks nothing like Eric had. Eric still looked a teen, someone he would forever be, seeing as he died at the age of eighteen. Tobias has been forced to grow up faster than Eric.
I wonder if I look older.
He lets out a groan. Opens his eyes. It's like waking a great animal from slumber. There's a second of deep stillness, where I can look into his eyes, get engulfed in their depths. They look like they've seen so many grave things. And they have.
And then they widen slightly. He's probably surprised to just see me watching him sleep. It reassures me to see him in front of me, like if I don't keep an eye on him he'll just disappear, gone from my grasp.
"Can't sleep?" he says. His voice is heavy. Husky with sleep.
I nod my head. "There's so many people in here. It's strange, almost." In the cars we weren't intimate in a way we had our bodies. We stretched over the seats and slept like a pile. Here there's a separation. Not a large one, though.
"To find there's so many people hidden away? To know we're not the only humans left on Earth?" Tobias says.
I smirk. "We would have been able to fix that problem."
"Really? Our alternative plan was to repopulate the Earth? Never told me that," Tobias says lightly.
"Just came up with it, actually," I say. Our conversation is light; we're not taking this seriously. Besides, that would be crazy, to repopulate the entire Earth with just us.
"It's not a very sound plan," he says. He cracks a bit of a smile.
"I'm working on it," I say.
"How? I've just been told. Haven't been involved," he says.
"So maybe it won't come into fruition," I say.
He frowns. "What won't?"
"Us repopulating the Earth," I say. "Probably won't happen."
"Oh, yeah," he says. His eyes glance away from me for a moment. My heart pounds and I hope he can't see the blush coming to my cheeks. He looks disappointed. He knows we just can't create that many humans, right?
He turns his gaze back to me. His eyes are turned tender. He reaches out two fingers and brushes a lock of hair out of my face. His touch grazes across my skin, burning a path in their wake.
"You know, despite what I've said," he says after a moment, "you are beautiful, Tris. Not in the traditional sense. But that's how I see you. It's the way you carry yourself, the things you do, that make you beautiful, Tris."
I don't blush like I expect myself to. I instead let his words fill me, and wonder why he's telling me this. I furrow my brows, and he says, surprised, "You don't like that?"
"No, I do," I say. "It just seems . . . out of context."
"Out of context? Where's the best place to tell your girlfriend that she is beautiful than late at night, laying right next to each other?" Tobias says. He raises an eyebrow.
"Okay," I say. It just seemed to come out of left field. Was it something I said beforehand? We were talking about repopulating - NO.
I had inadvertently brought up the idea of having babies.
I hadn't meant to do that.
Hopefully, he isn't remembering that now as he looks at me. A moment passes, and he whispers, "We should probably get some sleep. Big day tomorrow."
"Every day is a big day tomorrow," I say.
"I know." He waves with his hand, a common gesture to me now, and I slink against him. A position I'm used to. His arms around me, his head against my head and shoulder. My legs parallel to his. I expect myself to be scared now, his body pressed against mine, but I'm calm. I've done this so many times with him. He's just Tobias. He's trustworthy, and surprisingly has some morals. That's more than I can say of some people, human or Soul.
It's strange how easily we fall into a routine in Jeb's caves. He shows us the hospital and introduces us to Doc. He's friendly. A bit too much, almost. His eyes linger over Sharon, who stares back at him.
His hospital is merely a few beds along with a desk. Some containers line one of the walls. Some are clear and holds medical tools. Unsanitary. Very much unlike the Erudites. Wanderer looks around, scared, and Jeb puts a hand on her shoulder. She stops shaking when he does that, surprisingly.
"Don't worry, girl," Jeb says. "You're safe here. We're not going to be trying to get you out or what."
They can do that? I suppose not. Or else they would have led her directly to the surgery. Maybe it's our guns that kept them from doing that. Or maybe because Wanderer does mean something to Jared and Jamie. And I suppose Jeb.
Later that day we crack into the caves' rough walls. Within a month we've got eight new rooms. In the meantime, we all squeeze into the other rooms. Nobody wants to be with Wanderer, though, so I stay with her in the game room, despite everyone's looks.
Tobias doesn't say a word about it. I know he doesn't want me halfway across the caves. But he knows that I have too much Abnegation in me to leave her alone. Not when no one wants her.
I get a room with her and Christina. Christina has now a tolerance for her, like everyone else in the caves does. It's strange, always walking with her and feeling the stares. Wanderer doesn't say a word about it, though. But I know. She's scared. Especially when Kyle O'Shea looks at her like prey. He's the older of the O'Shea brothers. He doesn't try anything, though. Not when I'm around her. Which I always am, when I'm not working. And he knows I have a gun.
I pointed it at his brother's heart, once.
Ian and Aaron, led by Kyle, had approached us. Threatened Wanderer. Brushed me off. And once Kyle had Wanderer between his hands, I turned and pointed my gun at Ian's chest. The two brothers look almost like Eric. Not too long hair, but the same color. No rings, but the same arrogant smirks.
I turned to Kyle, who had his grip loosened. Wanderer had her hands on his, which were around her neck.
"Let go of her and never touch her again or I will blow your brother away," I said.
"Jeb would kick you out," Kyle argued.
"You too. For killing Wanderer. And I'd be the one with the gun, once we're kicked out," I say harshly.
He had let go of her at that - and never touched her again.
Those boys and pretty much everyone else in the caves don't talk much when Wanderer is around. Their conversations automatically stop when she comes near them. I try to ignore them, but I feel their glares and stares on me as well. For being with her, protecting her. For not shunning her like everyone else.
Tobias kisses me a lot more.
I don't know if he does it to make me feel not so alone. I don't know the reason, but I don't care. I love his kisses, his soft skin, the way he's so much nicer than everyone else. He doesn't judge me for being with the pariah. He always thought himself a bit of a pariah, different than everyone else. He works besides me and walks me to the washing room sometimes, so I don't have to walk the long length alone. He joins Wanderer and I at the table when we eat.
And so, eventually, does Jamie. He's curious, I think. About having a girl alien inhabit his sister's body. He's done with his grieving. Jared isn't, but he is. He's interested in her. That surprises me, but his interest is welcome. He smiles with her. Asks her questions. And she smiles, looking happy when he's nice to her.
I think she just wants to be liked. She reminds me almost of Marlene, though the two are/were total opposites in the social stance. Marlene was always so well liked. It would be strange to not like Marlene.
And everyone hates Wanderer. But Wanderer and Marlene look like they could have been sisters. More than Marlene and Shauna did. Shauna stays a lot in the kitchen, making bread on one of the tables or jostling Isaiah or Freedom, the two little children, on her lap. Their mother is appreciative for her help.
Everyone's looks at Wanderer remind me of Shauna and Hector toward me before. When they discovered I was Divergent and thought I was ridden with a special power that I would use for evil. And I'm not.
They're scared of Wanderer, but she is the most gentle Soul I've ever met. Literally. She doesn't say a word of complaint when she follows behind me to the fields, which we all work in after the caves are done. It's prejudice, I suppose. And they won't let her be kind to them to show them how she isn't what they think she is. She isn't a bloodthirsty alien trying to take over their bodies. But they don't care. So she doesn't say a word.
Until Jeb asks. One day. It's after supper. Field work's done for the day. Wanderer's off collecting dishes to wash and Tobias and I have the table to ourselves. Jamie's off talking with Ian, who sits next to Aaron, Andy, Paige, Jared, and Kyle.
She's about to carry the dishes away to wash them when Jeb says, looking up from his cup, "Hey, Wanderer. Why don't ya tell us a story?"
She stops in her tracks.
Stories? What stories? I straighten in my seat. Has she been wandering around the caves, as her name perceives?
Or does her name of 'Wanderer' have a real meaning behind it?
An alien wanderer. Of the different worlds and galaxies of our universe. Tobias looks interested as Wanderer hesitates, saying quietly, "I don't know if they want to hear about it, Jeb."
I want to know, though. I don't care that she's a Soul. Neither does Tobias, or Jeb, or even Jamie as he says pleadingly, "Oh, come on, Wanderer. Please? Just one story?"
"Which planet did you come from last?" It's Ian's voice. He's leaned against a table, his hands clasped together in front of him, his lips set together. To my surprise, interest is obvious on his face.
Wanderer barely says anything, but then she looks to him, and she explains. Jamie goes up to her and encourages her, and she goes on.
Maggie and Sharon and Kyle leave. They're disgusted by her. Kyle is especially vocal about it. How the alien is impregnating our minds with lies. Filth. Making us sympathetic to her.
They're the only ones that leave, though.
It's strange. Tobias and I and Christina and our group have only known that the Souls have existed for a few months. We've somehow warmed up to Wanderer. Gotten more used to having Wanderer's companionship. To me, she still holds a remnant of Melanie. It's still her body. And she's . . . she's as assertive as Melanie was. Sarcastic. Her smile looks the same.
And then the new people, like poor Jared and Jamie and the ones who have lived in the caves for a while. They haven't warmed up to her yet. Not really at all. Jared still stays away from her. I catch him, though, staring at her from afar. It's still Melanie's physical appearance, of course. The ghost of that haunts him. Like the ghost of Caleb haunts me.
But it still surprises me that Sharon, Maggie and Kyle are the only ones to leave.
Speeding things along. This follows The Host a bit, with the caves and all.
Thanks for reading! Please review!