And as the strangely long Mount Moon arc begins, the fic starts to earn its rating. To everyone who might find offense in parodying the Bible: I don't want to hear it. ;/
Chapter Ten: A Pint of Ayell (A Meeting of Gods! Psychotic Phrygoil?)
Nearly two thousand years earlier, an Absol sat on a lonely rock jutting out from the massive, snow-capped peak of Mount Coronet. He looked out over the colors of the landscape, muted by the darkness of twilight; the olive-green of forests and sapphire-blue of the waters beyond partially hidden by a herd of puffy white clouds. The regal calls of Staraptor echoed in the thin, freezing air, and he shivered slightly before turning to the pile of freeze-dried wood; a blazing Fire Blast leapt from his mouth, and the mass of dancing flames flew through the air for a moment, struggling for existence in the bitter cold, before wrapping around the sticks, licking them lovingly.
He rubbed his paws over the flames for a few minutes, letting them absorb heat like a sponge. It wasn't easy being a prophet, he had decided long ago. It especially wasn't easy being a prophet named Bart, although among humans he was more popularly known as Get-Offa-Mah-Lawn. But the truth still needed to be told, for the good of the world. Even if the world wasn't particularly good to him.
Regretfully, he got to his feet and passed the fire, facing the stony wall of the mountain before him. Its deep gray contrasted sharply with the pure white surrounding it. Taking a deep breath, he launched another Fire Blast, this time at the austere rock wall. The brilliantly glowing inferno poured from his gaping maw, splashing against the mountain's rocky face and casting jet-black shadows behind the campfire and himself. After several seconds his throat started to get really sore, and with a deep breath he cut off the Fire Blast effortlessly, although a few hacking coughs sent some stray embers on the ice-cold rock he stood on, smoldering briefly in a ruby-red glow before their lights winked out in the freezing summer air.
Yes, it was summer.
Bart sighed, then approached the wall, which in the intense heat from seconds before had melted into a sort of squishy yet firm substance, like a constipated Ditto. He lifted one of his paws, flicked out a dangerously sharp black claw, stood up on his hind paws, and began to meditate. He hadn't prophesied in a long time, not since he'd tried interviewing Uxie a long while back for a quote for Divinations, Chapter Three. What he should have realized from the psychic Pokemon's stern demeanor was that any behavior towards him short of rigid formality was like asking for the legendary's divine wrath. Thusly his "Yeah, I know what you mean" had earned him a week-long memory lapse, though people told him later that he'd been stumbling around with his tongue sticking out of his mouth, slapping his chest with a paw and occasionally murmuring "Duuurrrrrr…"
Well, he wasn't about to make that mistake again. This time he was going to do the thing properly. He'd be formal all the way.
He let his mind wander, carried through the perilous stream of time towards the future. Snatches of time flew past, giving him brief glimpses of burning villages and rampaging Gyarados before fading back into nothingness. It wasn't as if he could decide where in time he looked; certain events that hadn't happened yet simply called to him, and he had to come.
One thousand years … eleven hundred years … twelve hundred years …
Distantly, he could feel his paw hovering above the stone, ready to transcribe whatever he saw. He'd found out ages ago that stone, softened by the heat of intense fire, was the best material for recording while prophesying. The wind didn't ruin it, the rain couldn't wash it out, and any birds who were stupid enough to fly into it would be really sorry.
Seventeen hundred … eighteen hundred … nineteen hundred …
He had almost hit two thousand when he stopped abruptly, standing still in the timestream. Something was calling to him from that time, something with a pull so strong that his heart and soul would surely implode if he couldn't answer the call. It yanked him in, jerking him from the treacherous, speeding currents of time into the comforting security of real time, ticking away second by second rather than blending millennia with milliseconds.
On the distant mountain, his claw dug into the softened stone as he wrote what he thought.
I. Now it came to pass that in the morning, three legendary beings met in a dark, spacious place, and only they could pass the threshold thereof.
II. And behold, the cave was like unto the darkest of nights, and nothing could be seen therein, and the voices of the three beings could be heard therein.
III. And the first voice spake, and it was like unto an ocean of the purest silver. And it said unto its brethren: "Verily, my children, I say unto you: the most ancient of evils has awakened, even our oldest foe; yea, and we shall all be wracked in misery and eternal woe if he should achieve his goal."
IV. And the second voice spake, and it was like unto the wind on a grassy hill. And it said unto the first, "Mom, give it a rest already. Quit talking like an old person. And why are we being referred to as "brethren" anyway? We're all female, damn it!"
V. Then the first said unto the second: "Nay, my daughter, for in the trials and afflictions which all living things must endure, we are all like unto brethren in a storm of eternal anguish. And behold, to endure all things in all places together is to overcome the night, and raise the light of the sun."
VI. And the second was wroth, and said, "Whatever. Now will somebody please just get to the point and explain what's actually going on? So that this bloody prophet who's watching us can write something besides your old-person jibberish?"
VII. And the third voice spake, and it was bold like unto a bronze axe. And it said unto them, "Apparently the Missing One has been possessed by dear old Appy. Any thoughts?"
VIII. The first said unto them, "The like of this is unto a double-edged sword; yea, for the sake of our own peace of mind we had condemned an annoyance to exile, only for him to be stricken with our darkest foe."
IX. The second snorted and didst say unto them, "Oh, that's real peachy. Let's all go kill ourselves while we have the chance."
X. The third agreed and said unto them, "Well, it sure as hell won't be pretty."
XI. And a vision of such a future as this entered their minds; yea, and it was bleak like unto the fate of a ship in a hurricane, for behold, the three didst see the world perish within a lake of fire and brimstone, and the torment thereof was terrible to witness. And the vision didst vanish as quickly as it had come.
XII. Then there was silence for the space of half an hour.
"No, there was not! You're trying to make this sound all hopeless, aren't you?"
"Thou mayest be mistaken, for I shalt not—"
Bart was suddenly aware that, were there any light in the cave, the owner of the second voice would be glaring at him murderously. "Please," she snarled, "Shut. Your. Trap."
"Which prophet are you, anyway?" the third voice asked, in an effort to keep the second under control.
"Um…" he faltered. "Well, I'm … called Bart."
The second voice sounded surprised. "You mean Bart Simpson?"
"I dost not know of him, whosoever he may be," the prophet said carefully. "Thou shouldst believe me when I dost say—"
"Minnie, he's obviously not a Simpson," the third voice interrupted reasonably. "The only thing a Simpson could prophesize is … well … certain bodily functions—"
"I'VE TOLD YOU BEFORE AND IT LOOKS LIKE I'M SURE AS HELL GONNA HAVE TO TELL YOU AGAIN: DON'T — CALL — ME — 'MINNIE'!" the second roared. There was a sound of hundreds of small things rustling against the cavern floor.
"YEAH? WELL, YOU'RE ALWAYS CALLING ME 'TORI', YOU PRECOCIOUS LITTLE RUNT!" the third roared back. The howling rush of wind beat against the walls.
Bart cringed. This wasn't supposed to happen.
"MY DAUGHTERS!" howled the first. There was a brilliant flash, not of light, but of power. It stung Bart's senses, and his body in the past sneezed loudly. "DOST THE TWO OF THEE NEEDST BE SEPARATED?"
Abruptly the wind died down, the rustling ceased. There was a moment of ringing silence.
Then: "No, Mom."
"Sorry, Mom."
"Good. Now I sayest unto thee, prophet – art thou writing this down?"
"Yes, I am," Bart said, frantically jolting his body back to attention.
XIII. Then the first didst say unto me: "Now I sayest unto thee, prophet, that the darkest of all evils hast taken possession of a powerful chaotic, yea, and through his trickery and cunning he may destroy everything we dost hold dear."
XIV. Then I didst see a vision; yea, and there was a tall mountain in the background thereof. And behold, there were two young humans, male and female, which did walk towards it. And behold, the maid wast exceedingly fair, and the young man wast exceedingly short. And I noted that a Pichu and Charmander didst travel with them.
XV. Now the first spake unto me yet again, saying: "Behold, if the Lord of Evil dost continue successfully on his venture, then these two children which thou dost see shall be called to prevent the horrors of that which wouldst follow. For behold, the Twins of Fate hast claimed them, and hast thrown them into the perilous depths of adventure."
"I've tried to keep those bloody Twins under control, but nooooo, they just have to screw up everything all the time and leave me to clean it all up," the third sighed. "Should I go tell them to stop, Mom?"
"Such action mayest not be wise, my daughter, for it mayest be possible that other legendaries dost seek to place the Lord of Evil into that power which he dost crave."
"Treachery in the legendary ranks?" A hiss of breath escaped from the third. "Impossible."
"But it's like nothing's impossible these days," the second drawled patiently. 'They keep advertising that on TV. "Try our product and all your dreams will come true … buy today!' Bleh." There was a sound of insolent spitting. "Why don't they just come clean and say 'Hey, if you don't buy what we're selling then we're gonna use the power of money to sic the government on your sorry little asses.'"
Bart didn't answer. He was too busy writing, translating the conversation into a more "elevated" language and trying to deduce what exactly a "TV" was.
"We shouldst not let the others know that we mayest be onto them," the first continued. "Dost thou agree?"
"Yes, Mom."
"Whatever, Mom."
"I thinkest thou dost need an attitude adjustment."
"Aw, no, Mom—"
"We shall bide our time," the first said, smoothly cutting the second short. "The Missing One may yet shake the hold which the Lord of Evil dost have on him. If such dost not happen…" She trailed off.
Bart hurriedly finished what he had been writing, waiting patiently for the first voice to continue.
"If it dost not happen, we shall have to act speedily."
"C'mon, Leaf! You said it before, we need to be speedy here!"
"I know, I know," the girl called ahead without conviction, unable to take her eyes off the scene far below. The night before, the wreckage had glowed dazzlingly bright, its yellow and blue currents of light shining beautifully against the darkness of twilight. But now, in the natural light of morning and the electricity having finally died away, the devastation could be seen in all its glory (or lack thereof), displaying the fried buildings swamped in clouded water with depressing clarity. Helicopters, looking hopelessly small against the hellish background, hummed to and fro over the disaster like bees in a tropical greenhouse, indecisive of which flower to approach first. Even the most black-hearted person would find that a little of themselves would have died upon seeing the tragically final wreckage of that once great city.
"Leaf! C'mon! Get over it already!" Frosti, sitting on her shoulder peacefully like a good little reptile, swung at her head with an Iron Tail, taking care to prevent actual damage by aiming at her ear. Unfortunately, he seemed to have forgotten Brock's advice about inaccurate moves, and the glowing tail caught her full on the head, knocking her forward into the grassy earth and giving her a nice mouthful of moss.
"Pfffftbbffft! Yech. Frosti, are you crazy?"
"Well, really." The Charmander bit his lip, looking apologetic as he stepped to the ground and helped her to her feet. "Sorry. Guess I don't know my own strength."
"What strength?"
"Hahaha, very funny, Leaf."
"No, really—"
"Ahem."
Leaf jumped about ten feet into the air, shrieking. Lightning, who had sidled up to her side sneakily to whisper into her ear, smirked as he watched his traveling partner attempt to untangle herself from an overhanging tree branch.
"That was so not funny!" she fumed.
"It was freaking hilarious!"
"Yeah, it's all fun and games until someone gets a heart attack, right?" Leaf asked sarcastically. Scowling, she glanced down at the ground beneath, shut her eyes tightly, and let go.
"OOOF!"
"Whoops! Sorry Frosti!"
"Now we're even, right?" Frosti grinned up at her weakly. "Now please get up. I think my tail is burning your pants."
Leaf jumped about ten feet into the air, shrieking.
"Déjà vu, anyone?" Lightning asked with a good-natured sigh, looking up at the furious, thrashing form of Leaf, stuck in the tree branch again. "I've said it before, but it bears repeating: I'm glad I'm not a girl."
"Everyone's glad you're not a girl, darling," Peach sighed romantically, running a paw through his hair as they watched Leaf struggle gracelessly.
"I'm a girl!" Phlash Phryer shrieked happily, zigzagging from tree to tree to gnarled tree. "I'm a girl! I'm a girl! I'm a girl!"
"What exactly is she doing?" Cobalt asked tiredly, marching up the rugged trail as if it were a mountain, which, being made almost right on Mount Moon's side, it technically was. There was the normal trail, which trainers preferred for its lower chance of death, and then there was the family of steep, treacherous trails, of which this one was merely a little brother, its slope a relatively shallow forty-five degrees. The only reason anyone would use one of these daredevil dust paths would be to cut their travel time considerably, charging head-on at the height rather than winding back and forth. After all, he wanted to get as far away from the disaster scene as possible. Not that he was sorry for it; the Boss would probably promote him for being the only Rocket so far to actually destroy a city.
Bulbasaur shrugged. Despairing from lack of intelligent life-forms, Cobalt had decided to let her out for a breather. She was trotting by his side, scowling at nothing in particular. "How should I know? You think I can read weasel minds or something?"
Phlash zipped around a tree, snapping at it every now and then with her huge fangs. "The sky-ee-aye-ee-aye-ee-aye-ee-ayyyyyyyyye issssss bluuuuuuuueee…" she sang, her voice cracking from the horrendous off-key-ness.
Cobalt gritted his teeth. The soft, feathery hairs on his pale purple wig danced in the slight breeze.
"So how do you plan to put up with her again?" The dinosaur snapped at a passing fat fly, but spat it out in horror when she realized she'd actually managed to catch it. "Yech. I'm hungry, by the way. I haven't eaten since that last battle you used me in, you know."
"...and I-ee-aye-ee-aye-ee-aye-ee-ayyyyyyyyye lurrrrrve youuuuu…"
"I remember every detail of that day. I'll tell you—"
"I don't want to hear it!"
"Hush!" Gina hissed, somewhere in the tall, dense bushes lining the trail. "Don't talk so loud! I'm listening for the mating call of the rare male Anorexic Wailord! They're looking for unsuspecting baby Diglett to jump on—"
Bulbasaur rolled her eyes at Gina's stupidity. "You'd rather listen to that. Right."
"…I've got my eye-ee-ayessss on you, 'cuz I don't despi-ee-ise-uh you…"
"It was a sad story, really. You tossed me a lettuce head and said 'Bulbasaur, we're fighting Surge in ten minutes,' and I said 'Oh really?' and you said 'Yeah really!' and I said 'No way!' and you said—"
"I don't want to hear it." Cobalt glanced in Gina's general direction, but the girl didn't complain about his volume.
"Whatever. I'm your slave, I'm supposed to entertain you, remember? So you send me out against his Sirplus, which naturally almost kills me, and then Laint Surge says—"
"Excuse me. Laint?"
"You idiot. It's what the L-T stands for."
Cobalt facepalmed. "It stands for 'lieutenant'! Not 'laint', lieutenant!"
Bulbasaur blinked. "Really? All this time I thought—"
"Forget it."
"Whatever. Anyways, Lieutenant Surge says, 'You got spunk, kiddo. That makes you even more fun to pound into the floor.' And you say, 'I won't lose!' Pffft. Famous last words. Then you go all retarded and yell, 'Bulbasaur, Vine Whip!' I'm already paralyzed by the bastard's Thunder Wave, but does that convince you to pull me out? No. Instead you say, 'C'mon, Bulbasaur, we can do this! I have faith in you!' You moron. Faith isn't going to stop defeat from tasting like sh—"
"Bulbasaur."
They paused in their stride. The Pokemon smirked darkly at her trainer's harsh gaze; she had struck a nerve.
"You are never to talk about my noob days again," he growled menacingly. "Am I clear on that?"
"Considering the sorry state of your brain—"
"I said, am I clear?"
Bulbasaur frowned. It wasn't like him to get worked up about something, especially something as trivial as this. "Fine, fine. Sheesh."
"Good." Cobalt relaxed visibly.
"I really don't see why such a stupid thing should make you so touchy."
"Oh, weeee want the funk … gotta have that funk, oh weeee need the funk…"
"Just call me Cobalt from now on, okay? Not my first name, just Cobalt."
Bulbasaur eyed him slyly. "Why? Don't your Rocket buddies know full well that your name is—"
"Daddy!"
"Phlashy!"
Looking around, Cobalt saw Phlash and another Phrygoil bouncing around the tree excitedly, squealing. The new Phrygoil, he noticed, was slightly thicker in the neck and chest, due to his greater age.
"You lived through the bunch of lights, Daddy! Congratulations!"
"So did you, Phlashy! You're awesome! You're also very phabulous!"
"Did the whole tribe get out? If they fried it would've been funny!"
"Yeah, but your granny didn't! She saw Ronald McDonald eating Dippin' Dots!"
"Wow! Visions? They're cool! She's been saved by the grace of McDonald!"
"You mean grease?"
"That too!"
"Yay!" they both said at the same time.
Bulbasaur sighed. "It seems that wherever you go, Cobalt, insanity follows you like it was sent from Sentarpen. But that fits, because you're retarded. So if you'll excuse me—"
"Oh no you don't!" he said, grabbing her by the bulb before she could return herself to her Poke Ball. "If I have to deal with them, I'm dragging you down with me!"
"Nooooooooo!"
"Sheesh, calm down. It's not like they're going to drink your blood or something."
"Look, Daddy, that's Weird Hair Guy! He's funny and weird! He caught me and now he's going to take me to spread the word of McDonald! And there's a little pimple-toad with him! Let's drink its blood!"
"Okay!" her dad said happily, and sprang forward, fangs bared.
"Cut that out," Cobalt said tiredly, picking up Bulbasaur and whisking her out of harm's way. Plash's dad snapped at the air where she had been a second before, and looked up, confused. "She's mine," the trainer explained.
"Oh," said the Phrygoil, looking disappointed. "But it would've been so much phun."
"And Weird Hair Guy, this is my daddy, Phather Phryer," said Phlash.
"What? I'm a daddy? I don't get it, your honor, I didn't even look at that droolishly sexy phemale," Phather said, speaking into empty space with a deranged look on his face. "Let them eat phish."
"Wrong year, daddy," said Phlash. Turning to Cobalt, she whispered conspiratorially, "He's not really right in the noggin."
"Noooo, really?"
"Yeah, really. But it's okay, as long as he stays on his meds most of the time, the Donphan he sees aren't pink."
"Ah…"
"Okay, Daddy, we have to go now. But I'll convert everybody, okay?"
"Okay, my sexy Snorlax."
"He's very sweet, really," Phlash said fondly as they set off again, looking briefly over her shoulder at Phather, who was now attempting to make out with a stump. "The kids will look after him. I have twenty brothers and sisters, you know. I'm the oldest. Fweeheehee."
"…" Bulbasaur jerked herself from Cobalt's grip, landing with a thump on the trail.
"You're a yummy steak," Phlash commented to Bulbasaur, beaming at her.
Bulbasaur growled darkly at this.
"Okay, guys, no fighting!"
"I said to shut up for the Wailord!"
Not for the last time, Cobalt wondered how many IQ points he was going to lose on this mission.
A while after Leaf had finally been convinced to at least try and get over her guilt over destroying one of the prides and joys of the Pokemon world, she and Lightning neared the base of Mount Moon. Its tall peak grazed the wisps of clouds gathering around it, and gnarled trees grew on its rocky surface at awkward angles. Numerous dark holes dotted its base, displaying entrances to the intricate network of tunnels within, although the main entrance dwarfed them all, being at least three times larger than the runner-up. Running along its north side sat a long, deep gorge, through which flowed the roaring, wild Moon River, its white water pounding against the cliff faces as it sped westward toward Johto. On the distant north-eastern horizon, the silhouettes of tall mountains, the source of the River, framed the brilliant blue sky.
The Pokemon Center, by comparison, looked rather dull and boring, sitting clumsily by the far more majestic mountain. Several other newbie trainers would be stocking up on supplies at a few of the small stores nearby, preparing for the journey into the dark caverns within. Many would even stall here for time, attempting in vain to build up courage to move on.
"Ahhhhhh!" Leaf and Lightning sighed in unison as they entered the Pokemon Center, its air conditioning a welcome relief from the growing heat outside. Frosti scowled slightly, but said nothing.
"Hello, noobs!" the Nurse Joy behind the counter chirped happily, beaming at them as if they'd won something.
This nurse thing is going to get really annoying, Leaf thought darkly.
"Healing up for your journey?" the Nurse continued, as they walked towards her. "Everyone does. I'd probably have to sue you for Pokemon abuse if you didn't."
Looking incredulous, the teenagers returned their Pokemon before unclipping their other occupied Poke Balls and setting them all on the counter. "You're kidding, right?" Lightning asked nervously.
"Nope!" chirped the Nurse, taking the Poke Balls and placing them onto some sort of machine behind her, numerous Poke Ball-sized slots indenting its surface. Displaying the picture, status, and owner's name of each Pokemon on a screen on its side, the machine hummed a moment before letting off a high-pitched ding. Abruptly it popped three of the Poke Balls into the air, like some sort of alien toaster. Joy deftly snatched them out of midair and placed them casually back onto the counter, smiling at her wide-eyed clients. "Your Weedle, Caterpie, and Nidoran are good to go," she said happily. "But the others will need to be here for just a bit longer." She eyed Lightning, and suddenly her expression was stern. "You haven't been taking very good care of your Pichu, young man."
Lightning stiffened in shock. "What? Yes I have!"
"You've been making her use Volt Tackle several times in succession. Don't you know that move hurts the Pokemon that uses it?"
The boy opened his mouth, shut it, opened it, and shut it again, like a beached Magikarp. "I didn't know—"
"That," the nurse interrupted, "is obvious." Her expression softened at his helplessness. "I'm sorry for snapping at you like that," she said, a bit apologetic. "I get sort of protective around hurt Pokemon … anyway, you should be limiting the use of that move from now on, understand? Use it only when you need to."
"Only when I need to," Lightning repeated in a humbled voice, taking Peter's and Dory's Poke Balls back.
"Good." She turned to Leaf, and the cheeriness saturated her voice again. "Your Pokemon are—"
A sudden tremor cut her off, vibrating through the air and shaking the room somewhat. Chairs bounced up and down slightly, and a couple of Poke Balls rolled out from a side room behind the nurse. The young teenagers gasped and clung to the counter, holding on until their knuckles turned white, but after the initial shock had set in they realized that the quaking was quite mild and was merely rattling the room about a little.
Joy sighed, her voice jumping around with the tremor. "F-fifth on-n-n-ne this-s-s we-ee-ee-k-k."
Leaf frowned. Earthquakes, like evil clowns and the influence of testosterone, were not things to be taken lightly. "Wha-a-at's caus-s-sing them-m?"
The nurse shrugged. "I hav-v-ve no id-d-d-d-dea, b-but it see-ee-ee-eems t-to b-be com-ming from the-e-e moun-n-ntain."
As abruptly as the quake started, it ceased. Lightning looked around nervously, wondering if it was just about to start again, but when it didn't he painfully released his tight grip on the counter, prying his fingers off from around the edge. Leaf let go with less of a hassle.
Joy smiled, and resumed with what she had been saying before. "Anyways, your Pokemon are in better condition, but they still need to be fully healed for your adventure." She winked.
"Ah … thank you?"
"You're welcome!"
Excusing themselves politely, the two left the Center as fast as possible. Even a mere newbie knows when to leave behind the presence of a person who is loopy enough to use more than one exclamation mark in a row, especially after an earthquake.
Outside, they reeled from the sudden change in temperature. It was cooler that day, but the air conditioner in the Pokemon Center still made the air seem thick and dry.
Lightning started to turn to Leaf to ask what they should do while waiting, when suddenly a kid yelled, "Look, down there! It's Kaleri Kutter!"
A mass of young trainers suddenly swarmed towards the voice of the crier, sweeping from the stores and various places in the surrounding bushes. Leaf and Lightning exchanged glances, shrugged, and followed the crowd, kicking up dust as they went.
The multitude halted at the edge of the river, staring down into it and waving frantically. Struggling to get a better view of the scene, our heroes circumnavigated the apparent fans and found their own little spot at a small boulder a little ways from the crowd, looking into the pounding, treacherous river. White waves pounded against the rocky cliff faces on either side, rushing westward with unstoppable determination.
And surfing against the current, pushing though the waves, was a slender, serpentine Pokemon. His cream-colored body shone in the sun, wet scales reflecting dazzling light. His tail, a collage of magenta and sapphire scales, ended in four longer scales, which formed a sort of fan that splashed through the icy water, sending a refreshing spray everywhere. Long, pink eyebrow fins bounced up and down as the Milotic swam through the water, and a pair of pink antennae also sprouted from his pointed head. Around his neck was a black cord, from which a sparkling blue teardrop hung.
Sitting on his back sat Kaleri, who was looking stunning herself in her mere shorts and tank top, laughing in joy as the Milotic slithered up and down the waves. She was oblivious to the crowd watching her; however, Milotic had noticed them and, never slacking in pace, snaked his head over toward her and jerked it upwards, drawing her attention to them. With a broad grin, she waved happily at her beloved fans, a sure sign that she was unaware that Lightning was there.
Fokagirl, sitting behind her trainer, waved as well, a strange-looking bracelet circling her fluffy wrist. It boasted a large, poisonously purple orb, which caught the sunlight and threw back a rainbow of indigos and violets. Another Pokemon, this one more closely resembling a human, sat on Milotic's head and nodded sagely at the watching kids. Her thin white body seemed to morph into a skirt at the waist, which did an awful job of covering her green, tapered legs. Her deep red eyes were framed by a pair of Wise Glasses, and a pair of blunt red horns jutted from beneath the folds of her hair, which was, for some strange reason, yellow. Leaf squinted, trying to think – was that Kirlia's shiny color? A few seconds later logic caught up with her: of course she wasn't a shiny, her hair had merely been dyed bright blond.
"That's Safegirl!" Lightning said excitedly, gesturing at the blond Kirlia. "And Pulson, he's the most amazing Milotic ever! And there's Fokagirl, of course." His delighted expression faded as he looked over them again, and he pointed, lip turned up in contempt. "But what on earth is that?"
Following his finger, Leaf realized that there was a fifth individual down there, sitting in front of Kaleri and looking extremely plain compared to the four beautiful ones surrounding him. He was the silver Pokemon from the day before, who had nearly blasted Lightning's head off. His large black eyes passively returned the watchers' stares, and he looked almost bored.
Leaf looked for any more distinguishing features…
And looked…
And looked…
And looked…
And looked some more…
"Leaf, you might as well stop looking," Lightning sighed, "it's getting annoying. That thing, 'Shadowson', I believe, is just blah. She probably ended his little time-out early so he could repel people."
The girl was forced to agree. A body, four legs, a head, a small tail: that was basically it. He wasn't muscular or adorable or anything, he simply was. This is not to say that he was ugly, because he wasn't remarkable even in that respect. His dull silvery fur didn't give off a stunning "beautiful" vibe; instead, it gave off an almost undetectable "valuable" one. He was like a sink that somebody famous had washed their hands in.
"Seriously, even a Ditto is more interesting, appearance-wise." Lightning turned away, disgusted. "What she's doing with something like that, I have no idea…"
"Considering she's an expert coordinator, it makes sense to take on a challenge like that," the Pokedex commented unexpectedly, peeking from Leaf's handbag as usual.
"Why's that?"
"I was hoping you'd ask. Ayell, the Unlovable Pokemon. Gender is Male. Height is Crushable, Weight is Not a Pro Wrestler. It's overlooked frequently because it simply looks like nothing interesting. It can pick one of two ways to survive: just cruisin' as its uncool self so predators don't notice it even when it's in plain sight, or using one of five of what the stupid people call the 'Styles of Survival'. If it masters a retarded style enough, it might even manage to evolve. And if you can get an Ayell to evolve, you will own the contests. No lie."
"Wow," Leaf said, surprised. "The Pokedex actually said something informational for once."
"Don't I always?"
"She has an Ayell?" Lightning looked stricken. "That was an Ayell? I'm doomed!" He moaned and put his head in his hands in a defeated manner, peeking through his fingers to watch Pulson around the bend and out of sight. Their idol having vanished, the crowd dispersed, muttering excitedly among themselves of Kaleri and her voyage towards Cerulean City.
Leaf snorted. "Lightning, you need confidence. Badly. That thing is not gonna beat you."
"Yes it is!"
"No, it's not. It's a cat without a life, so drop it. It's not worth paying attention to."
Lightning didn't respond. Sighing, Leaf looked out on the scenery on the other side of the river, a journey for another day that may or may not come.
They had only been sitting there a few minutes, waiting for their Pokemon to be healed at the Center, when a sudden quaking bounced them around painfully, shaking the land and everything on it. Terrified of being knocked into the river, Lightning shrieked and grabbed at the earth, fingers digging into the hard, dusty layers of dirt. Gripping the small boulder nearby, Leaf clung for her life. Wild land Pokemon squealed and darted from their hiding places in bushes, looking for a safer hiding spot, and birds squawked as the trees they perched on flung them into the air, where they were safe from the violently shaking ground. This wasn't the tame quake from the Pokemon Center; this was big.
Nearby, Mount Moon shook dangerously, knocking several large rocks loose from its higher ledges and sending them crashing down around its base and into the river. The large, gaping hole in its side, which marked the main entrance into the twisting caves within, yawned a dark yawn even with the chaos surrounding it. Leaf looked towards its endless maw and shuddered: suppose this earthquake was coming from the mountain itself? What sort of thing might lurk within to cause this strange phenomenon?
The earth rumbled deeper, rising to a dark crescendo and a foreboding of something tragic to come.
And come it did.
Pain rushed through the chaotic's mind, shooting waves of pain that made him grit his teeth in agony … or would have, if his teeth were his anymore. How anyone could endure this other being's presence for this long and live, he had no idea. He credited it to his own sheer power and force of will, but that was doing as much good as a rubber band stretched across a highway in an attempt to halt a speeding truck.
The being pushed him ever further back, down into the dark folds of his unorganized mind … down, down, down—
It stopped. He struggled, confused, shrouded in darkness and locked in the body that was no longer his own. He could see through his eyes, but it was as if he were watching a movie from a great distance; so far away … attempting to move his gnarled hand, it refused to move from his side.
And inwardly he shuddered as the Lord of Evil used his new mouth to speak.
"Foolish one, I will indeed make you powerful, trample those you despise under your feet and cast them into everlasting destruction … just not in the way you believed I would."
The chaotic attempted to reply, but his jaw would no longer obey his command.
The Lord of Evil continued, neither knowing nor caring of his prisoner's distress. "My unknowing slaves cause great wreckage in the northern mountain. It shall result in my first Crushing in this time around. You will one day be honored to have helped me in this."
The tormented chaotic struggled harder, in vain.
A muffled explosion from within the depths of Mount Moon added to the already violent earthquake, and Leaf gazed in horror as a large number of rocks were blasted from the main entrance, the hard projectiles moving outwards at a lethal speed. Instinctively she ducked, involuntarily ramming her head on the boulder. The pulsing pain erupting in her head couldn't block out the grim whistle rushing above her, as some rocks sliced through the space where her head had been seconds before.
As before, the shaking stopped abruptly, leaving Leaf covered in dust. In the ringing silence, there was a shrill, mangled squeal, cut off by a pwisssh sound, like a water balloon popping. The subliminal hiss of air could be heard, but barely. Puzzled, Leaf shakily got to her feet and looked around for the source of the noises.
Her eyes widened as they fell upon the sight, and she forced herself to swallow the bile rising rapidly in her throat.
A large rock sat a few feet away from the teens, and pinned to it by a sharp, pointed rock was a dead Jigglypuff. Its rapidly deflating pink body leaked a sickening combination of blood and pus from the hole in its gut. The bulge of its dark stomach was beginning to peek out of the hole, like a dog's nose. Its large green eyes were glazed, its mouth forever fixed in a silent scream. Air continued to hiss softly from its limp carcass, which draped around the rock like a discarded banana peel.
"What—?" Lightning began, noticing Leaf's horrified expression. Following her gaze, he gasped and rushed towards the edge of the river, just in time to be violently sick into it.
"When they say Jigglypuff's the balloon Pokemon, they aren't kidding," the Pokedex said helpfully. "Did you know that eighty-two percent of it is made up of air? Now you know exactly what Airheads are made of. And they don't have bones, either, so they can't get boners. I feel bad for them."
At this point, Leaf was of two minds. The death was horrible and disgusting, of course. And yet … and yet, she remembered how much Jigglypuff's cutesy, cheerful antics that she'd seen on TV had utterly disgusted her as a kid, and how she'd wondered what sort of Barbie-doll worshipper would want to catch one. In a way, seeing her old childhood "enemy" defeated with such finality was, to some extent, perversely satisfying. Some primal corner from within wanted to tweak Jigglypuff's withered pink food and giggle, Wanna sing for me, Jiggly? Sing me a song. Just one. What, so shy all of a sudden? Pity. We coulda had such fun…
"Leaf!"
Snapping back to reality, Leaf realized that she had been leaning forward, about to poke Jigglypuff in the forehead. She jerked her hand back and shivered. Get a hold on yourself, girl, she thought, grabbing her wrist with her other hand and glancing up at the sky nervously. This isn't the time for not acting normal. "Sorry," she muttered sheepishly, unwilling to turn and brace herself for whatever expression was on Lightning's face. "I'm just weird. We should probably clean this up, though. Cheri, go!"
A beam of neon-red light, and the small Weedle appeared, looking around in confusion. Noticing the Jigglypuff, she took a double take and stared, shrinking back slightly. "Oh, dear," she whispered.
"I know, it's a mess."
"No." Cheri turned to her trainer, a look of horror and foreboding that seemed, somehow, to see this as merely part of a bigger picture. When she spoke, however, she sounded deadly calm, and much older than her age. "No, you don't understand. It's been Crushed, the first of many. A sign. The world's about to end."
(Have I mentioned how much I love Phlash? Because I do, seriously. I LOL so hard whenever I write dialogue involving her. :D )
And now, info on Ayell~
Ayell
Type: Normal
Classification: Blending Pokemon
Height: 1'00"
Weight: 9.3 lbs.
Abilities: Hustle/Adaptability
Egg Groups: Ground/Fairy
Gender: 87.5% male, 12.5% female
Color: Gray
Catch Rate: 45
Evolution:
Ayell → (maxed Cuteness) → ?
Ayell → (maxed Toughness) → ?
Ayell → (maxed Smartness) → ?
Ayell → (maxed Coolness) → ?
Ayell → (maxed Beauty) → ?
Sometimes referred to as "the Coordinator's Eevee", Ayell is considered quite a challenge to take on in contests, due to its lack of interesting features. Its classification as the "blending" Pokemon refers to how it can easily blend into the background to avoid detection. Another similarity to Eevee is that its name also comes from two letters: A-L are the last two letters in the word "appeal".