For the First Time

by Junebug617

A compilation of one-shots that examine a series of Lily Evan's and James Potter's interactions from their First Year at Hogwarts until beyond their Seventh Year. Each chapter is centered around a different "first" in their lives, such as their first kiss, first meeting, and first date.

10. Lily Confessed She Was Pregnant

STORY NOT COMPLETE.

I HAVE TO SAY THIS ONE PUT ME THROUGH THE WRINGER A BIT. I HAVE NEVER BEFORE SPENT SO MUCH TIME WITH A CHAPTER AND TAKEN SO LONG ON IT. BUT HOPEFULLY IT PAYS OFF! ORIGINALLY I HAD INTENDED IT TO BE A CONFRONTATION BETWEEN LILY AND SNAPE AFTER HARRY HAD BEEN BORN BUT SHE WENT INTO HIDING WHILE SHE WAS STILL PREGNANT, SO HERE THIS ONE IS. ON ANOTHER SIDE NOTE, IT IS VERY RARE I EVER GIVE REVIEWERS A SHOUT OUT BUT I HAVE TO GIVE A BIG THANK YOU TO ELLIEY BLACK, WHO HAS BEEN SO GREAT TO ME AND THIS STORY. ENJOY.

"You mean you're…happy?" Lily asked tentatively.

Sirius whipped around, his face beaming. "Happy? Lily, I'm overjoyed."

"Really?" She began to allow herself a soft smile.

"Why wouldn't I be?" For the second time in the last few minutes, Sirius looked so much older than he actually was. He regarded his best friend's wife with the fondest smile a nineteen-year-old could muster.

"I thought maybe, I don't know…" Lily trailed off nervously. "I guess I was worried that in a time like this, a baby was the last thing we needed to worry about."

"Lily," Sirius smiled tenderly, putting an arm around her shoulders. "A baby is the perfect symbol of hope that we so desperately need right now. Your little Potter is the best thing that could happen to us all."

---

THE FIRST TIME…Lily Confessed She Was Pregnant.

"Thanks for coming with me." Lily smiled at Sirius as the two crunched through the snow.

"No problem."

It was cold outside. Lily could hear the wind howl its lonesome song, whistling through the now barren trees. All around, snowflakes the size of knuts fell softly on her nose, melting into drops of water before she could wipe them away. It looked peaceful if you didn't know any better. But if one thing was certain, Lily did know better.

She was more than aware that beyond the safety of the darkened forest and its softly falling snow, Voldemort's Death Eaters were on the move. Somebody somewhere was being tortured. Or murdered. The thought made Lily nauseous.

"So why are we going to a muggle gro-what is it called again? A grovery store?" Sirius asked, stamping past cottages covered in white.

"A grocery store," Lily corrected with a laugh.

"I knew that," Sirius muttered.

"Come on," she pulled him along. "Its not much farther."

They were nineteen years old. Young, by most people's standards. But Lily already felt as though she'd survived a long life. Some days she felt she should be sitting in a rocking chair with her grandchildren around her, knitting scarves and hats for the cold winter. Lily had seen the worst life had to offer. And the best. It was the most anyone her age could hope for in a time as dark as this. She had seen the innocent die, the loyal turn traitor, and the strongest fall apart. But within the desperation and despair wartime brought, Lily also discovered just how powerful love could be. Love and friendship.

For whenever dark thoughts strayed her way, she had James's arms to warm her, Sirius's laugh to make her smile, and Remus's kindness to lift her spirits. Though she rarely saw Peter these days, he too, could still bring a tug to Lily's heart when he visited. Always so nervous and hesitant about even using their bathroom, Lily had grown fond of the forgotten Marauder. She had grown fond of all of them. It was the curse of marrying James she supposed as Sirius tramped alongside her. It was as if she had married four men in one.

"I hope what you're getting is worth it," Sirius grumbled as the grocery store came into view. "Its dangerous being out in these times."

"It's a muggle grocery store on New Year's Eve, Sirius," Lily pointed out. "There will be dozens of people here. I promise, this is the last place Death Eaters will look for us."

"Well I wouldn't count on that," Sirius remarked bitterly. "But if you insist."

"All I need is some buttercream frosting, pickles, and lots of Mars Bars."

Sirius looked at her, one eyebrow raised. "What could you possibly need those for?"

Lily blushed. "I'm craving it."

"Oh Lily," Sirius managed a bemused smile. "You truly are one of the strangest people I know."

A warm gust of air blew from the entrance of the supermarket as the sliding glass doors slid open. As Lily had predicted, they were not the only one's within the day before New Years. The whole store was bustling with carts piled with last minute boxes and bags.

Though the mood was slightly dampened from what Lily typically considered New Years, she knew the muggles were experiencing far less anxiety than everyone else in the Wizarding World. Hype about Voldemort was mounting each day and though they could sense that things were not all right in England, the muggles were still generally unaware of the impending darkness closing in around them.

"They're so ignorant," Sirius said disgustedly. He stuck out like a sore thumb with his emerald cloak. Lily had managed to get him into some pants and a sweater she had made James buy but Sirius had refused to wear a muggle coat.

As a mother with a screaming child passed with interest, Sirius shrank back towards Lily. She only gave him a look that said quite plainly, "I told you so," and began scanning the aisles for what she needed.

By the time they had located the frosting, Lily had found two boxes of cereal, a cake mix, three different flavors of Pringles and a family-sized bag of Pretzels she also wanted to buy. Looking incredulous, Sirius had grabbed her a large cart and said, "You better be glad Prongs can support your lifestyle."

But Lily had a secret as she pushed the cart through the aisle. A secret she hadn't told anyone, not even James. Sirius chatted next to her about his house elf, Kreacher, and how Lupin was doing, and that the Ministry really was a couple of buffoons for not picking up on traitors in their midst. But Lily wasn't listening.

It had been two months. Two long months. And still she hadn't told anyone. Lily couldn't exactly say why, though she supposed it was a mixture of fear and hope. A piece of her still believed that if she didn't acknowledge it, it couldn't be real. They lived in dark times these days. It was no place for a…a…baby.

"Lily, are you okay?"

"Hmm?" Lily jerked back towards Sirius with a false smile on her face. "Oh-yeah, I'm great."

Sirius didn't look convinced but he didn't push as Lily added a jar of pickles to the cart.

"Hey Lil, I'm going to take a piss," Sirius said, eyeing the contents of her cart warily, "Just keep your wand handy and stay in this aisle, okay? James would have me dead faster than You-Know-Who if something happened to you."

Lily nodded, trying to appear cheerful. "Yeah, I wont go far."

Reluctantly, Sirius nodded and swept out of the aisle, startling a man carrying some jars of peanut butter at the end. Lily shook her head with a small smile. If only he had just worn a regular jacket…

The minute Sirius vanished from sight Lily hoisted her bag up over her shoulder and pushed the cart down the aisle. She had some shopping to do that didn't just include her food cravings. Luckily, Sirius's bathroom run enabled her to put off telling him about the… the, er… Well, that wasn't important. Lily pushed it from her mind as she scanned the aisles she was passing. Baking goods, Breads, Cereals, Tea, and here she was. Vitamins.

Biting her lip, Lily entered the empty aisle. The specifics of what she wanted were murky. After all, Lily didn't exactly know what prenatal vitamins were or when she should start using them. Lily sighed. If her mother were here, things would be very different. The fear surrounding Lily's middle wouldn't be so great and her company on vitamin shopping trips wouldn't be the heir to a dark Wizarding fortune. At the thought of Sirius, Lily glanced around furtively, as if imagining him popping out of the nearest Vitamin A.

Quickly, she began to scan the bottles. There were so many options. Vitamin C. Riboflavin. Folic acid. Vitamin D. Potassium. Niacin. The lists were endless. Lily threw a couple bottles of so-called prenatal vitamins into her cart that contained lots of folic acid. Alice had said that was good for pregnant women. The round-faced Gryffindor had surprised Lily with the news of her own pregnancy only a week ago and Lily couldn't help but feel more secure now that she had a friend who was going through the same thing. In fact, according to Lily's math, her and Alice would be due almost the same time. The redhead just couldn't force herself to share her own secret with the newly labeled Mrs. Longbottom yet. Not before she told James. And so her and Alice had laughed with joy and cried with sorrow when Lily had finally been informed. Alice thankfully had passed the afternoon educating Lily on everything an expectant mother would need. It was where she got the idea for the vitamins in the first place.

As was as she was examining some one-a-day options, Lily heard a noise. While completely absorbed in her quest, she had failed to notice that someone had entered the aisle with her. He cleared his throat as she turned to face him. His face was sallow and gaunt, as if he hadn't been getting enough to eat. The black hair that framed his face hung to his shoulders in a remarkably straight line. If you hadn't known, the overcoat and black pants that he wore would've allowed him to walk straight down a street of muggles without attracting attention. It was the kind of outfit that only someone who had witnessed the muggle world could put together.

"Lily."

His voice was as dark and rich as it always had been. Her name seemed too familiar coming out of the mouth of what was now a stranger.

"Severus." Instinctually, the hand that wasn't holding vitamins went to her stomach. "What are you doing here?"

He cleared his throat. "Dark Lord's orders."

"What does your master want with us?" Lily suddenly hissed, shaking off her initial shock and placing the cart in front of her defensively. "Have we not given him answer enough that we are not interested?"

Snape's eyes darkened and Lily realized too late she had spoken in the plural out of habit. But what did she care? He deserved it.

"It was not my choice to plead with you once more," Snape said stiffly. "I was personally selected for this job. My knowledge of the muggle world and my ability to blend—."

"They thought I would have a soft spot for you," Lily cut him off with narrow eyes. "I thought You-Know-Who would at least be smart enough to realize whatever friendship we had is long gone."

Snape closed his eyes momentarily at her words and took what Lily thought to be a long breath.

"I do not come on a personal business," Snape started again, his eyes glittering dangerously. "I come on behalf of the Dark—."

"Well, you can tell him no," Lily snapped. "Once again and for the rest of my life. No."

"Lily—." Snape stopped himself, as if her name was too painful to say.

"What, Severus?" Lily asked darkly. "What could you possibly have to say to me?"

Snape shifted nervously in his polished shoes. He had never had polished shoes before, Lily thought. His clothes were always rather ragged and second-hand. It made her head spin to think about where he had gotten the money to pay for them.

"I beg you to reconsider," Snape began slowly. "This is his last hand of friendship that will be extended to you and-and…Potter." He paused, and Lily could see he had done his hardest not to spit out James's name. "The Dark Lord is growing more and more powerful each day. If you stand in his way, he will not hesitate to kill you."

"So be it," Lily said angrily.

Snape's face fell. "Lily, please—." But his words of protest died as his eyes fell upon the bottle still clutched tightly in her hands.

Trailing his gaze, Lily desperately tried to push it down and out of sight but it was too late. Severus Snape's face had already drained of whatever color it had managed to retain. Biting her lip, Lily hurriedly shoved the vitamins back onto the shelf marked "PRENATAL."

There was a silence between them for a moment. A deep, resonating silence in which two old friends looked at each other like strangers. At the end of the aisle, an older woman wandered down to look at the oatmeal displayed on the opposite side. Hands trembling, Snape quickly removed his wand from his coat and flicked it at the woman. As if he was guiding her, she quickly stood and tottered away from the aisle. Lily's insides went cold. The only spell that could control another's mind was the Imperius Curse. Snape had just done illegal magic. It was one thing to hear of dark deeds but another to see them.

As Lily worked to wipe the stunned look from her face, Snape turned his attention back to her and the "PRENATAL" shelf. He shook his head, lips trembling.

"You're not—," Snape spluttered slowly, eyes dropping to her middle. "Please tell me you're not."

Lily flushed. "Keep your voice down, I haven't told anyone yet."

The two fell back into silence, Lily with her face as red as her hair and Snape looking as though someone had told him Christmas was cancelled. She desperately wished Sirius would reappear and save her from this conversation. Weren't men supposed to pee quickly? But then again, Sirius was not the usual man. He liked to take his time in all things, including pissing Lily supposed.

"How far along?" Snape managed to ask faintly.

Lily's hand went to her middle. "Two months."

He took a step back, his face a mixture of horror and disgust. "I read of the engagement in the Prophet. I thought for sure it was just a hoax, just a show of happy times from the Ministry. A cover. And then the wedding announcement came… I didn't realize—," he broke off, "I never thought—."

His mouth rearranged into a grim line. "I thought your dating Potter was a fad. I never would've believed you'd take it so seriously."

"What did you think? That I was dating him just to annoy you?" Lily asked, her eyebrows furrowed. "Don't bother to think so highly of yourself."

Snape looked hurt and it occurred to Lily with a rising heartbeat that maybe that's exactly what Snape had thought.

"And now you're carrying his child."

The venom in his voice was plain as his eyes fixed on her stomach.

"I can see you still haven't given up on an old school rivalry," Lily responded, crossing her arms uncomfortably.

"He tortured me, Lily. He made me the laughingstock of the school. I was humiliated time and again—."

"And so you became a Death Eater?" Lily cut him off with a shake of her head. "How many people have suffered because you, Severus? How many people have died at your hand? Have you tortured muggleborns like me? Wait—," she held up a hand painfully, "Don't tell me. I don't want to know."

"Don't talk to me as if you know anything about my life now," Snape hissed, anger growing in his voice. "You have no right! You turned your back on me. For-for him."

"Don't blame me for your choice, Severus," Lily said dangerously.

"What happened to us, Lily?" Snape murmured, breathing heavily. "Where did our friendship go?"

Lily just shook her head as he looked at her imploringly, black eyes boring into hers.

"Why did we have to lose each other?"

"It was a long time ago—," Lily started.

"But not too late," Snape suddenly said urgently, moving forward to the end of her shopping cart. "The Dark Lord is willing to offer you and…Potter… amnesty. He knows how powerful you two are. Your talents are legend. Come with me and all your fears can be over. Don't you want your child to be safe?"

Lily squirmed uncomfortably as Snape continued.

"We can go back to being the way we were! Back in the summers, laying in the fields, playing in your backyard."

He looked so eager that for a moment, Lily's heart clenched at the sight of him. The picture he painted was so happy. So…unrealistic.

"Those kids that we were…" Lily said painfully. "That's not us anymore. We've grown up."

"But we don't have to—," Snape started.

"Sev," Lily said beseechingly. "You and I both know that we no longer stand on the same side. I could never desert the people who are doing the right thing: fighting against You-Know-Who."

Snape just shook his head.

"Instead of trying to convince me to join you," Lily said softly, "How about you join me instead? Fight for Dumbledore. Fight against this murder and discrimination. You're a powerful and talented wizard, always have been. Think of how much good you could do."

Snape trembled as he spoke. "I—cant. Lily, you don't understand the Dark Lord and the way he works. I would never escape—."

"We would help you!" Lily exclaimed, moving closer to him. "Cant you just try?"

"And what?" Snape burst. "Sit around and watch as you play house with Potter? Watch as your stomach grows larger and witness the birth of just another Quidditch playing, good-for-nothing troublemaker? Have to see how Lupin confides in you as I used to do? Witness Black traipse around you as if he was your best friend? No one would trust me, no one would want me there. I don't think so."

"As if switching to You-Know-Who's side would be any better for me," Lily said.

"I could never forgive them for the things they did," Snape finished in a low snarl.

"Forgiveness is a beautiful and terrible thing," Lily sighed, looking her old friend straight in the eye. "It is a painful and difficult journey but in the end, you realize it is the only way."

"He doesn't deserve my forg—."

"Oh don't talk to me about why James does or does not deserve your forgiveness!" Lily snapped, her face flushing rosy pink. "You have no idea how long it took me to forgive you for what happened to my parents! Don't think I don't know that you—." Her voice broke as Lily covered her mouth and pushed the tears back in her eyes. "My parents died because of you, Severus. Kind, trusting people who always saw the best in you. They died at your hand." She shook her head bitterly. "They never saw my wedding. Nor will they meet their grandchild." Lily placed a hand on her stomach tenderly. "James was there for me when you weren't. He comforted me from the pain you caused." Her finger jutted out accusingly at Snape.

"Lily," Snape gaped, his face an ugly red color. "I swear I didn't know. I wouldn't have told them if I had known!"

"How could you possibly have not known?" Lily muttered, her nose crinkled in disgust.

"They asked me where I grew up," Snape told her desperately. "Everyone that came from Hogwarts knew you and I lived close to each other as children. They asked me about you but I refused to tell them! I was almost killed."

Lily shrank away, unbelieving.

"Lily, you have to listen to me," Snape begged, "I showed the Dark Lord my childhood memories. He wanted to find you and James. He wanted you on his side and he was going to use any means of persuasion to get there."

"So he killed my parents?" Lily choked back mocking laughter.

"He was looking for something to use!" Snape insisted. "Your address… It was on your house in so many memories. We passed the street sign. Please, Lily, I didn't mean for them to get hurt. I never meant to give your parents away."

"I wanted to kill you," Lily said bitterly, averting her eyes from Snape's desperate expression. "I wanted you dead."

"So why didn't you?" Snape asked softly.

"James," Lily said simply, looking at Snape with disappointment. "He talked me out of it so many times."

Snape screwed up his face in annoyance. "Lucky me."

"I have forgiven you for what you did," Lily told him fiercely. "But it wasn't easy. And you have James to thank for your sorry ass. The least you could do is forgive him too. We were all young and stupid."

The two stood breathing heavily in the oddly ordinary grocery aisle. It seemed so strange that they would meet here out of all places. A place that was so…normal…when their lives were anything but.

"Potter never deserved you," Snape declared, almost to himself. "He already had everything he could desire. He could've had any other girl. Why couldn't I at least have gotten you, Lily?"

"I'm not a possession!" Lily snapped back. "I was never something to be won!"

"I never said—."

"It was not up to you or to James to decide who I would love, though Merlin knows you both tried. I make my own decisions. And I chose James." Her green eyes blazed. "I choose goodness and bravery. I chose fighting for what was right and a loyalty to your friends that you stopped showing me, Severus. So what if all those things came with some ego and a penchant for ruffled hair? When you truly love someone," she looked at Snape fiercely, "All those things don't matter anymore."

"You were my best friend, Lily. You were good and kind, one of the best people Hogwarts ever got the privilege to teach. How did you end up with that arrogant sod?"

"When you started treating me as if I was the exception to most muggleborns."

"What?" Snape spluttered. "What do you mean?"

"You did it just moments ago. You told me that I was one of the best Hogwarts has seen. But you seem to forget that I was muggleborn. That the good and kind witch you recall had parents that you now consider below you." Lily shook her head. "When you started treating me as if I was the exception and not the rule with muggleborns, that was when you lost me."

"And so Potter's way was so much better?" Snape spat bitterly. "Treating you just like everyone else? Never giving you the respect or the kindness you so often showed others, even his own friends."

Lily rolled her eyes, exasperated. It was fruitless to argue.

"He's changed," she told him truthfully. "In a way. In some ways, he's just the same. But you view him with rose-colored glasses, Severus. Or perhaps…" Lily trailed off for a pregnant pause. "Through glasses green with envy."

Snape glared. "Don't you dare. Potter was nothing but an arrogant fool. Always will be."

Lily sighed.

"You don't know James, Severus."

"Do you?"

The question ignited a fire that had been sparking in Lily's heart since she had first turned her gaze on Severus Snape that morning.

"I love him more than anything," Lily declared, her voice growing with every word. "So stop trying to persuade me that he is a man with two faces. That man is you. You are the one whose loyalties were never decided! Always playing the field evenly, never showing too much open support for either."

Lily looked at him disgustedly. "And let me tell you something about James, just to clear the air one final time. I would die for him, Severus, and he would for me. James, and not you, has shown me what true loyalty and bravery mean. He had stood up for me, laughed with me, slept beside me in my own bed." Her voice shook with emotion. "I wear his ring on my finger, I have taken his last name, and his child now grows inside me. And nothing else, nothing else, could ever make me happier."

Snape's gaunt eyes seemed to glitter more than usual as a glassy coating appeared on Lily's eyes. It was indeed, the final end to her oldest friendship. Snape had been many of her firsts. The first wizard that she met, the first friend she truly made, the first person who understood her in a way that Petunia and even James when they were younger, never could. Maybe it was only appropriate that he was also the first person she told she was pregnant. But despite all the things he had claimed first place on in her life, he had lost out on what was the most important of all. Being the first love of her life.

"There you are!" The buoyant and rather loud voice of Sirius Black boomed behind her. "Sorry I got caught up with some worker. I was looking for you everywhere! Thought James would behead me if…"

He drew up alongside her. For a moment, Sirius only stared at Snape, mesmerized, as if he were the ghost of a long-lost relative finally reappearing. But just as Lily opened her mouth to speak, the two enemies whipped out their wands.

"Lily, get behind me," Sirius pushed her behind him.

"Sirius, wait—," Lily tried to resist, but the Quidditch Beater swiped away her weak attempts at pulling him away.

"We meet again," Snape uttered, drawing each word out with a cruel smirk.

"Leave him alone!" Lily insisted.

"I've missed you, Snivellus," Sirius sneered. "I do see you still haven't washed your hair since we last met."

"Cant touch me now, Black," Snape spat. "The Dark Lord's already helped your traitor of a brother into the grave. I would bet he'd be glad to continue the family tradition."

Sirius roared and raised his wand. A flash of light exploded upwards as Lily jumped onto Sirius, knocking his spell out of the way. Flailing, Sirius turned, causing Lily to crash down painfully on the floor as Snape began to laugh. "She still defends me against you, I see," he sneered.

"Don't count on it," Lily spat, clutching her stomach and staring at Snape with slits for eyes.

His face fell as a manager of the store came whirling around the corner. Quickly, Lily knocked a few boxes off the shelf she was leaning against. "What is going on?" the poor muggle man spluttered as Snape and Sirius both hurriedly pocketed their wands.

"I tripped," Lily volunteered quickly from the floor. Sirius was still glaring daggers at Snape. "I'm afraid I crashed into these boxes."

The expression on the manager's face turned from anger to concern. "Are you alright, dear?"

"I'm fine," Lily grimaced painfully, still clutching her stomach. "I'll pick them up. We're fine."

Nodding slowly, the man's eyes traveled suspiciously to Sirius, whose lurid green robe seemed even more amiss than before among the vitamins and oatmeal boxes.

"Carry on, my good man," Sirius grinned charmingly. "My girlfriend here is very clumsy."

"Of course," the manager nodded, unconvinced. "Of course. Well, then I will leave you to it. Check out is in front when you need it."

The three former classmates remained where they were for a moment, breathing heavily as the man slowly walked down the aisle and turned the corner.

"Well," Snape said coldly as he pulled his coat closer around his thin figure. "You've made your answer clear, Mrs. Potter." Lily flinched as he practically spat out her name. "But you've been warned. The Dark Lord will show you no more mercy."

Lily only glared as he swept from the aisle. He didn't look back. It was the last time she would ever see Severus Snape.

"Lily, are you alright?" Sirius asked, crouching down next to her with concern. "You fell pretty hard."

"I think I'm okay," Lily said hesitantly. She refused to lift her hand from her stomach. "I'm just worried about being gentle because of the—."

Hurriedly she dropped off. Lily hoped Sirius hadn't noticed but as he stared at her curiously, she knew that he had.

"What were you doing over here anyways?" Sirius asked, his eyebrows drawing together as he helped her up. "What could you possibly need from…"

He glanced over to the shelf opposite them and then back at her. Lily saw as his intelligent eyes skimmed over "PRENATAL" just as Snape had minutes earlier. Once more, he looked at the shelf of vitamins and then back at Lily. His eyes zeroed in on the hand protectively clutching her stomach.

"Lily Flower," Sirius said very calmly. "Is there anything you want to tell me?"

Lily opened and closed her mouth, as if trying to speak but failing. Her tongue felt twice the normal size and all the moisture seemed to have vanished from her mouth. Clearing her through with a cough, Lily's fingernails went to her mouth. "Er…Sirius. I, well— I may have had more than one reason for wanting you to come along today."

She faltered as Sirius only stared at her stoically. "I—er. You see, I'm— well, er—."

As she once more trailed off, Sirius gave her a soft smile and said, "Lily dearest, I'm not going to bite. At least not in this form."

He coaxed a soft smile from her and Lily found her tongue loosening. Sirius nodded encouragingly, tucking a stand of hair behind her ear as if she were a young child. She had never seen him so mature.

"Sirius. I'm pregnant."

"You're what?"

"I'm pregnant," Lily repeated, leaning back against the wall. "I'm two months along."

Sirius looked stunned. "Two months…?"

"I know, I know," Lily bit her lip. "Don't hate me for not telling anyone sooner."

"Hate you…?" Sirius looked dazed. And then suddenly—

"I'M GOING TO BE A GODFATHER!"

Lily could only stare in shock as Sirius began to whoop in delight.

"Oh Lily dearest, please say I can be the godfather. Please?"

"Of course," Lily stammered.

He crowed with delight and picked her off the ground in his arms. "Our Lily! Our beautiful, wondrous, intelligent Lily Potter. Pregnant!" He twirled her midair amid shouts of laughter. "Watch out world! We're going to have another little Potter running about! I bet he's a Quidditch star, just like his father. And he'll be just as smart as his mum!"

He set her down and kissed Lily hard on the forehead.

"Who says it'll be a boy?" Lily managed to say.

"Or a girl," Sirius added with a dismissive shrug. He turned to the aisle of vitamins. "So this is why we came! Pregnant food cravings and-what is this? Prenatal? What does that even mean?" Sirius shrugged. "Ah well. You'll need all of it, just to make sure."

And he dumped the contents of the whole shelf into the cart.

That finally jumped Lily out of the stunned reverie she had found herself in at his outburst.

"You mean you're…happy?" Lily asked tentatively.

Sirius whipped around, his face beaming. "Happy? Lily, I'm overjoyed."

"Really?" She began to allow herself a soft smile.

"Why wouldn't I be?" For the second time in the last few minutes, Sirius looked so much older than he actually was. He regarded his best friend's wife with the fondest smile a nineteen-year-old could muster.

"I thought maybe, I don't know…" Lily trailed off nervously. "I guess I was worried that in a time like this, a baby was the last thing we needed to worry about."

"Lily," Sirius smiled tenderly, putting an arm around her shoulders. "A baby is the perfect symbol of hope that we so desperately need right now. Your little Potter is the best thing that could happen to us all."

Lily finally allowed herself a grin as Sirius laid a gentle hand on her stomach.

"I'm guessing Prongs doesn't know?"

Lily shook her head. "I was too afraid. I figured telling you was the next best thing to telling James. I just assumed your reaction would be almost the same to his and I would know what to expect."

"Oh Flower," Sirius said with a grin. "If you think I'm excited, just wait until you tell James." He placed both hands on her shoulders and faced her towards him. "You will make him the happiest man on earth."

"Thanks Sirius," Lily said thickly as water once more began to pool in her eyes. Man, these pregnancy mood swings were already becoming apparent. Sirius pulled her in deeply for a hug and Lily cherished the warmth of his embrace. Even if it was a green velvety one.

"So what do you need for this baby?" Sirius said, becoming almost business-like as they drew apart. "We've already got you all the vitamins."

"Sirius, I do not need the whole shelf-full," Lily laughed as she viewed their cart. "I just want to try a few."

Sirius looked downtrodden. "But what if—."

"No buts," Lily told him with a grin as she began to unload the vitamin bottles.

It only took a quarter of an hour to unload the vitamins and check out up front. Sirius attempted to pay in galleons, which only caused more stares, and Lily had to quickly shove more than enough muggle pounds into the irritated manager's hands in order to keep some sense of normality. It was a miracle they made out it without a call to the police.

But nothing could ruin Lily's mood now. For however nauseous the thought of telling James about the baby or caring for a child made her, Lily was no longer alone. While she may not have Severus Snape to comfort her any more, she had made new friends. Slipping her hand into the one Sirius wasn't using to hold the bags, she grinned.

"Thank you," she said sincerely. "I couldn't do this without you."

"Trust me," he smiled. "Compared with James's pining over you for seven years, this pregnancy will be as easy as finding a reason to put a Slytherin in detention."

And just like that, Lily laughed. A true laugh. The first one she'd had in months. And suddenly she knew that everything was going to be just fine.

"Let's get you home, Evans," Sirius pointed towards the rows of cottages emerging into view. "And make James Potter a very happy man."

---

"Lily, Sirius, is that you?"

"We're home," Lily called as her and their shaggy haired friend pushed through their front door.

James appeared around the corner, his hair cut shorter than he'd had it during their school days, but by no means any less untamable. Lily grinned and pointed at a particularly stubborn piece in the back that James promptly tried to flatten. He failed as Sirius kicked off his shoes, missed the rug and sent snow flying all over the wooden floor.

"Really?" James asked his friend exasperated.

"I'll clean it up," Sirius sighed, though he couldn't help but wink and clap James on the back as he passed.

It left Lily alone with James.

Her heart quickened.

"How was the store?" he asked innocently, reaching to take the grocery bag from her.

She held onto them with a steel grip. "Good," she stammered. Sirius had taken the ones that held muggle food to the kitchen while Lily had carried the vitamin one herself.

Shooting her a quizzical look, James let go of the bag and let Lily follow him into the kitchen.

"Sirius tried to pay in galleons," Lily offered in an attempt to distract him. It worked.

"He what?" James chuckled. He raised his voice towards the direction Sirius had wandered off towards. "Is that true, Padfoot?"

Sirius padded back into the kitchen at the sound of his name. Slightly disgruntled, Lily recognized him to be holding one of the bags of chips she had bought for herself. "Is what true?" he asked, popping one in his mouth. "The fact that Lily's—."

"SIRIUS!"

Sirius stopped mid-chew as Lily's hand hit the counter with a threatening glare. James only stared with wide-eyed surprise.

"Not. Yet.," she said through gritted teeth.

Sirius gulped, looking apologetic.

"What's going on?" James asked confused as he looked between his wife and his best friend. "You both know I'm not an idiot so you might as well spit it out."

Lily glared at Sirius, who looked suddenly bashful. She was suddenly regretting all the mental praise she had given him about his new maturity. Sometimes, men will still be boys. James scowled as the silence grew.

"What is it?" he asked irritably. "What can you two know that I don't?"

Sirius looked at Lily with a shrug that seemed to say, "Go for it." Lily felt the instinctual rising heartbeat of the thought of baby talk with James.

Clearing her throat, she said, "James, do you want to maybe come to the sitting room with me?"

Still looking suspicious, her husband nodded cautiously. Lily watched him keep his gaze on Sirius, whom attempted a half-hearted smile, as he exited the kitchen. This was going to be interesting.

"Good luck, Flower," Sirius whispered encouragingly as she followed him out. Lily gulped.

She had imagined this scenario many times. Sometimes they were in the kitchen making breakfast. Sometimes outside in the garden. Or just going to bed at night. Lily had always been able to picture the time and place but once she got to the actual confession, the daydream seemed to dissolve in front of her. But this was no daydream. This was reality. She took a deep breath.

"James, I need to tell you something," Lily said as she entered the room. He looked up at her cautiously. "I haven't been entirely…truthful with you for the last month in a half."

James just stared at her very seriously, his eyes worried behind shining glass lenses.

She bit her lip nervously. "I just hope you understand and aren't angry."

"Lily," he said apprehensively, "Please don't tell me you had sex with Sirius."

She laughed, feeling the ball of tension in her stomach loosen slightly as her husband gazed at her, half-joking, half-serious. "No," Lily told him with a firm shake of her head. "A million times no. Not in a thousand years."

"You don't need to lay it on so thick!" The muffled voice of Sirius echoed from the kitchen.

Lily quickly crossed the room and shut the door, blocking the former Beater's hearing.

"So what is it then?" James asked tensely, leaning against their fireplace. Lily allowed herself a glance at the pictures that lined the mantelpiece as she walked towards him slowly.

There was one of them with their Head Boy and Head Girl badges from Seventh Year. James was smiling brightly and made continued attempts to kiss Lily on the cheek. He was stopped by Lily's younger self, who pushed him off with a fond smile. Next was one that Lily knew James favorited. It was him, Sirius, and Lily on their wedding day, grinning blissfully as if nothing could make any of them happier. The third and final picture had been from the day they got engaged. James had called their friends to celebrate the minute the future Mrs. Potter had entered the door of her new home. The party that night had been one of the last times Lily saw all of her friends in one place. James had insisted on reenacting the proposal to everyone's delight and Lily, forced to go along with her fiancées theatrics, was submitted to a picture of them at the doorway with James down on his knee, a silly grin upon her face.

"I remember that day well," Lily smiled as she leaned opposite James on the mantel. His gaze drifted over to the engagement picture where the younger version of himself repeatedly mimed giving Lily the ring and then bowed to an invisible crowd.

"I do too," he said with a faint grin. "I don't think I ever knew a time my heart beat so fast."

Lily forced herself to swallow as the beat of her own heart suddenly seemed amplified. "James," she began anxiously. "Do you remember what you said to me after you proposed? About moving into the house and getting married?"

James looked thoughtful for a moment, his hand reaching back to mess up his black hair. Lily's heart swelled at the small gesture. This was James. The James she'd loved her whole life. She could do this.

"I said you weren't alone," James said slowly. "That you weren't without family."

"Because—?" Lily prompted him, a hand habitually going to her stomach.

James shrugged casually. "Because we would start one together."

"Exactly," Lily breathed, forcing herself to smile. She took a step closer to him, watching, as his eyes grew concerned.

"You can tell me anything, Lily," he told her softly. Tenderly, he pushed a strand of red hair behind her ear.

"I know," Lily said, biting her lip. "And that's why I'm sorry I haven't told you this sooner."

James only looked at her quizzically, waiting patiently for her to continue.

Lily took a deep breath.

"James, that day we talked about starting a family. We talked about not being alone. That together we could start something new. Well," Lily grinned nervously. "I guess we should've seen this coming then."

Putting a hand on each of his shoulders as Sirius had done for her in the grocery store, Lily bit her lip with a smile.

"James, I'm pregnant."

His face fell open with shock. "You're—you're—."

His mouth opened and closed uselessly as he stared at her, stunned. Hesitantly, she nodded, watching as he covered his face with his hands and blew out a deep breath.

"I'm only two months along," she said, "But I thought it's been long enough for you to be kept in the dark. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I was just afraid—."

But she never did finish what she was going to say. For James's arms had closed around her middle as he swept her into a tight embrace. "You're pregnant," his breath came softly into her ear. "Oh Lily, I'm going to be a father." His fingers trembled as they cupped her face, kissing her gently on the forehead.

She nodded weakly.

"I'm going to be a father," he repeated, astonished.

"Are you happy?" Lily asked nervously.

"Am I—happy?" James's face split into the most radiant smile. "Lily, nothing in my lifetime could make me happier."

James began to laugh, swinging her about the room as water gathered in Lily's eyes. She sniffled thickly, laughing through her tears.

"You hear that!" He punched his fist in the air in triumph. "I'm going to be a father! James Potter is going to be a dad!"

He dropped to his knees so that his head was level with Lily's stomach. "Do you know if it's a boy or girl?"

"I think it's to early to tell," Lily smiled, biting her lip.

He raised the front of her shirt so that her still-flattened belly was exposed. "Hello there," he grinned at her stomach, touching it gently with his hand and then pausing, as if expecting the baby to respond.

"Its probably just a small little blob right now," Lily told him.

James looked up, eyes shining. "Our kid is in there."

She touched his head gently and fondly trailed her fingers in the jet-black hair she loved so much. "I know."

"We're going to take good care of you someday," James said, unable to keep the smile off his face as he brushed her stomach. "We're going to be the best parents you could wish for." Leaning in, he kissed the skin softly and smiled up at Lily.

"We're going to be parents," he told her.

Lily nodded. "This poor child," she laughed, wiping the tears starting to stream down her face. Why did pregnancies have to come with so many emotions?

James stood and pulled her close. "We're going to be a family now," he told her gently, touching his forehead to hers. "We're going to be the Potters. And for all time, people will remember us for how awesome of parents we were."

Lily shook her head, amused. "Oh James, lets just hope our future child doesn't inherit your ego."

"I thought you liked my ego," James exclaimed with a grin. "You said it gave me personality."

"Of course I should've known that would go to your head," she laughed.

Suddenly, Sirius burst into the room, crumpled chip bag in hand, staring intently at the tender scene between husband and wife.

"So it went well?"

"Padfoot!" James exclaimed. He pulled his best friend into a tight hug, nearly bowling him backwards into the kitchen. "Can you believe it? I'm going to be a father!"

"I know!" Sirius said, throwing back his head with a laugh. "I know, Prongs."

"Merlin, Lily, was I really the last to know?" James asked incredulously, turning back to look at his now blushing wife.

"Well, I er, I found out by accident," Sirius said gruffly. "Lily tried to sneak some prenatal vitamins into the cart-those have to do with babies, you know- and I- er, I forced the truth out."

Lily breathed a sigh as Sirius only winked at her. She really did owe him.

"Call Moony, and Wormtail," James declared. "Get everyone over that we can. We're going to celebrate!"

"Its New Years Eve, James," Lily laughed, joining her husband at the door. "Everyone will have plans already."

"Then just the three of us!" he declared, his glasses sliding down his nose in excitement. "We just got new groceries, I'm sure I have some old firewhisky bottles in the cellar. We'll celebrate just here in the living room."

"But no firewhiskey for me," Lily reminded him.

James smiled at her fondly. "Definitely not." She grinned.

"Never before have I seen two people more excited about the prospect of giving up alcohol," Sirius laughed. "But cheers! The more for me the better!"

And so as the sky outside darkened, the three friends sat around a roaring fire and leftover Christmas tree and shared the last of their happy days. They munched on pickles and frosting and told stories of love and heartbreak from the world outside. But from inside their little haven of warmth, it seemed as though nothing, not even Lord Voldemort, could reach them. It was nights like these that reminded Lily there really was nothing so important as love.

"To a New Year," Sirius raised his glass, his words slightly slurring. "And to James and Lily's most likely ginger baby!"

"To our future ginger child," James raised his glass. "And to the Potters."

"To the Potters," Lily and Sirius agreed with a laugh. Lily brushed her stomach with her free arm as their glasses clinked.

"Isn't is about time?" Lily asked as she took a deep sip.

James screwed up his face and peered at the grandfather clock that stood in the corner. "Get ready," he said slowly, biting his tongue in concentration. "And… Ten."

1980 was only nine more seconds away, Lily thought, curling up next to James. What could the new year bring?

"Nine," Sirius crowed happily.

Would it bring only more terror and fear? Or perhaps, just perhaps, a glint of hope? A chance that Voldemort might be brought down before the year was out.

"Eight," Lily added.

Everything had changed since last January. Her life had been turned inside out and upside down. But, Lily reminded herself as James slipped an arm around her, that wasn't such a bad thing.

"Seven," he said, kissing her on the nose.

In fact, it was a really great thing.

"Six," Sirius declared in a deep voice.

She didn't ask much of the new year. In fact, Lily only wished for what she had always wanted.

"Five," James nodded.

Friendship.

"Four," Sirius grinned.

Trust.

"Three," Lily said solemnly.

Love.

"Two."

In the split second that hung in the air, the three old friends looked at each other and smiled. Their glances were filled with a determination to survive and a hope for a better tomorrow. They were looks bursting with a love for one another that could not be bought or forced. A love that would keep them fighting through the darkest of times. A love that would remain above all else once they were dead and gone. They were the last glances of 1979, making the final thing Lily, James, and Sirius saw before the clock hit midnight was each other. And none of them would have had it any other way.

The year that was coming would bring death and destruction knocking on all of their doorsteps. It would bring the ultimate betrayal of Severus Snape and the last time James and Lily would ever see Sirius in person. It would bring a new life into the world, while so many others were being extinguished. 1980 would be the start and the end. For as Lily and James's legend would begin to fade, Harry Potter's would burst anew. A new story would open at the close. And the struggle born of this year would not end until all of Hogwarts's mischievous Marauders were dead, fighting to save the child that now grew in Lily's stomach.

But none of that mattered now. For in this one moment as the three friends smiled at one another, there was nothing so pure or so innocent as the love on their faces. And that was one thing Lord Voldemort could never touch.

"One."

THANKS FOR READING. ITS NOT YET COMPLETE SO SUSCRIBE AND REVIEW!