A/N: I'm sorry it's short but hopefully it's insightful? Waah Narita Ryohgo did an immense job in creating these two! no matter how much i dig it never seems to be far enough!

Alone

Izaya brought a trembling hand up to his lips as he stared at Shizuo, conflicting emotions shining in his eyes as he backed away from the other man. Words tumbling through his mind in meaningless circles dizzying him. The deafening silence closing in on him and threatening to suffocate him. His heart thumped against his chest with such force that it physically pained him, his breath continuously catching in his throat.

"Izaya..." Shizuo looked desperate but his pained voice did nothing to alleviate izaya's anxiety. He shook his head, still unable to speak and turned and ran as fast and as far as his feet would take him. He just needed to be as far away as possible.

Gasping against the wall of an unfamiliar building, the cold cement structure supporting his hunched frame cooled his head slightly. His mind was a mess of contradicting emotions as he tried to separate them and pinpoint the most overwhelming one. Marshalling them into order so he could attempt to regain some control over his thoughts.

There was fear. He had never expected something like that to come from Shizuo. If he did that then it would break his persona, his carefully constructed mask. He had made himself into an unapproachable symbol that was revered and feared alike. But this sort of situation makes all that pointless because it makes him human. In truth he is just another human, a part of the masses, nothing special at all. His mask, his armour, it all falls apart. If he can be approached, if he can be liked, if he can be kissed, he is just human. And being human scares him. There's too much uncertainty.

Then there was confusion. Why would Shizuo do that to him? It made no sense, he had been continuously messing with his life ever since the first time they had met. He had never apologised or felt guilty about his actions and continued to injure him, smiling all the while. Shizuo also hated him so why would he do that? They were enemies, they always had been and Izaya had thought that they always would be.

And there was anxiety. What if Shizuo had just been possessed by a moment of madness? The kiss may have just been a mistake, something that he would come to greatly regret later. That thought made the back of izaya's eyes sting. How could someone do that and then just brush it off as a mistake? But then again why would he not? After all Izaya was just the devil. He made Shizuo's life terrible, constantly attacked him, and ruined his chances of integrating with normal society so why would he feel that way about him? He couldn't. For someone to feel that way about him was impossible, Izaya knew it. He was unlovable wasn't he?

And then there was one strong, powerful feeling that set his chest on fire and made his throat dry. A feeling he couldn't recognise. One he had never encountered or experienced before. Miserably wiping away the tears that no-one would ever see, he made his way back to his home. He had nowhere else to go, nobody to turn to for advice, so he would go and sit in his empty apartment and watch the people outside from his large window. Separated from them as he always had been.

Shizuo had been his only real connection to the outside world.

Btu now he was surely gone, so that connection would undoubtedly disappear along with him.

He was truly alone now.

I'm such a horrible person...