Hey guys… so here is the update. Now, I wasn't going to update today due to an anonymous reviewer cheating the system, but I chaged my mind because we did get 100 reveiws

Thanks to: IzzyLuvs Emmett-Eames, Farah, Catbratty, Twifan1986, ReeRia, kembie, ClancyJane (Klutz wanted to let you know that your review got her so ridiculously weak she ran into a wall.) ohhayllno, Yummy dummy k, Sarah beara, Lemon drop, Coda, Sookie, D, ADADancer, and Vanquish13.

Thanks Ladies!

Alerts and Favorites are appreciated as well.

Standard Disclaimer Applies!

…JCE…

"Hello?" A deep voice called. Who enters their own house and asks that question? I wrinkled my nose in c onfusion. Alice peered out of the slits in the door.

"Maintenance!" Alice started whipped her shirt off and ran a hand through her hair.

"Take off your shirt." Alice hissed

"Alice... As flattering as that is, I don't bat for that team…" I blushed she punched me in the stomach, before tearing at the buttons on my shirt. "Whoa there buddy…" She rolled her eyes and yanked the undone shirt over my shoulders. "Kinda' feeling like I am supposed to shout rape right now... but this isn't the most unpleasurable thing I have ever done." I wiggled my eyebrows at her jokingly and she punched me in the stomach.

"I know someone's in here! I hear you!" The man yelled. Alice shoved the closet door, making it give way and she stumbled out dragging me by the hand. Standing in the doorway was a man of short stature. He was balding and looked kind of like Chuy from the 'Chelsea Lately' show, his blue overalls were stained and he had a large gap, which was revealed when his mouth dropped open.

"You think you would knock before barging in on someone. We weren't decent!" She shrieked. I knew she had a little bit of banshee in her. The man winced at her tone and then eyed us. Taking in the 'situation'. He leered at me and the tops of my exposed breasts.

"You two don't live here! A man does… I've seen him…"

"Yeah so what? Is he not a loud to have a bit of company? Seemed to me that he was enjoying our presence." She adopted a British accent and I just kind of stared off into space while doing the best to conceal my chest.

"So why don't you stop looking at my girl, and come back tomorrow. We were busy…" She ran her hand along my ass and I almost drop kicked her little ass on impulse. The man backed out of the room slowly.

"Do you want me to lock the door?" He asked slowly.

"No. Just let some random people in this apartment to snoop through James' shit." Alice replied with a head roll. The man nodded, before locking the door, looking her over once more and exiting.

"We need to leave." I mumbled.

Alice looked at me, "You think?" I hurriedly gathered our clothes and began throwing my shirt on. While Alice dressed I pulled out my phone and snapped pictures of the letters. We scurried out of the messy apartment slamming the door behind us. On the way down we passed a blonde man at his mail box, the maintenance man approached him, clapping him on the back and muttered, "Nice."

He turned his confused gaze on the man and I gasped, grabbing Alice's hand to make her stop.

I pointed frantically to him and mouthed 'James'.

Her eyes widened and she mouthed back 'What?' And I realize the wide eyes weren't from shock but immense stupidity.

'That's James.'

Her mouth moved too, mimicking the words I was mouthing, and then she shook her head, 'I'm sorry I'm no good at reading lips.' She mouthed.

Stupid bitch.

I threw up my hands and pulled her to me, whispering in her ear, "That's James." She turned quickly peeking over her shoulder at the jackass rifling through his mail. "Let's go." She nodded and we walked around James as much as possible.

He didn't even look up as we walked around him, Chuy had long since left, and we were tip toeing around a man who probably thought nothing of our presence. A presence that he was greatly enjoying earlier, as per Alice.

"He did not age well." Alice pointed out as we sat in the car.

"No he did not." I agreed we drove back to the house in relative silence.

…JCE…

"Honey, I'm home!" I called as I opened the door. I had dropped Alice off at her and Jasper's place earlier with a promise that we would meet up at a later date to go over everything. She first needed to read over the rest of the letters with Jasper once the digitally enhanced the shit pictures I took on my phone. Including the picture of the jizz sock. That was my new background thanks to Alice.

Edward rounded the corner wiping his hands on a dish towel and leaned against the wall. Mmm, the epitome of domestic sexiness.

"You've been gone for quite a while." He said smoothly, made me want to hump his jaw.

"Yeah well that's what happens when you have to sneak into a dirty ass apartment of a killer. What I did today wasn't even legal!" I realized, Edward wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed me.

Full.

On.

The.

Lips.

With tongue. My knees buckled and he caught me.

By my ass.

I was about ready to strip down and fuck him right here in the hallway when a throat cleared. I pulled away from him and looked to my right.

Once again it was all for show. At our kitchen table sat hot doc and a beautiful woman around his age. She appeared to be the one who cleared her throat and I leaned into Edward whispering.

"Who would have thought you just wanted to kiss your wife, hello?" He pulled back and chuckled.

"Mrs. Facinelli this is my wife Bella. Doctor, I believe you remember her." The doctor chuckled and shook that fucking head.

He stood from the table, "Oh yes, how could I forget one of the most charming patients I have had in a while?" I stuck out my hand, for a shake… you know, the way normal people do. But Hot Doc stepped it up when he took it and placed a kiss on my knuckles. Would have been a total swoon moment if he hadn't been making fun of me.

"Hey… Doctor Facinelli…" I said awkwardly slow. The woman came and stood next to her husband I was guessing, I stuck my hand out warily this time hoping she wouldn't kiss it too.

I'd had enough girl on girl action for today.

She obviously noticed my apprehension because she laughed and took my hand shaking it.

"Excuse Isabella. She's a little bit socially inept." He's one to talk.

The doctor laughed and pulled me under his arm, "This Bella? I don't think so. She seemed perfectly fine in my office the other day." I blushed as everyone got a laugh in at my expense.

"Mommy!" Ellie shrieked from her bedroom.

"Be right back." I stepped from under the Hot Docs arm.

"Bella she's just happy your home. Don't go back there, she isn't supposed to be awake." I gave him the bitch brow and he held up his hands, the couple in front of us laughed. I headed towards Ellie's room and wasn't even in her room when she tackled me. Like full out tackled. I busted my ass as I hit the floor, and knocked over a side table and she wrapped her little arms around my neck. She peppered my cheeks with kisses.

"I missed you!" She squealed as she choked the shit out of me with her hug.

"Okay, honey. I missed you too." I gasped as I attempted to pry her little arms from around my neck.

"Ellie! You need to be more careful!" Edward scolded as he helped me sit up. I guessed he came when my trip to her room ended up sounding like a herd of elephants falling over.

She sat on my lap, and continued to hug me whispering, "Daddies been mean to me." I winced as Edwards hand fell upon the small of my back, he noticed and lifted the back of my shirt.

"What'd he do pumpkin?" She shook her head and buried it in the crook of my neck. I reached behind me and slapped his hands away. "Just help me up." I ordered, he gingerly pulled me to my feet and instead of releasing me; Ellie wrapped her legs around my waist.

"I didn't do anything. She is angry because she was put on punishment. You should ask her what she did." I took him up on his advice.

"What'd you do, Ellie?"

"I answered the door."

"Without Daddy?" I asked shaking my head. She nodded and looked ashamed.

"That is not what you're in trouble for, Elizabeth. What did you say to Ms. Facinelli?" She sighed and gave him a cross look before continuing to speak.

"I told her she was pretty," I raised my eyebrows.

"Okay…." I trailed off.

Edward must have glared at her because she shot a pointed glare over my shoulder and continued.

"Then I asked if she was my new Mommy. It was just a joke and she laughed but Daddy got mad. Cause he's a pumpkin head."

"It didn't sound like a joke. She conveniently left out the part where she told Mrs. Facinelli that she was the third one this week."

"She stopped laughing there." Ellie pointed out.

"Third one?" I looked at Edward over my shoulder with the bitch brow firmly in place. Edward threw up his hands and stomped away.

"I was kidding, don't be mad at him. You're my only Mommy." She pressed her warm forehead to my cheek and I kissed it. I think she managed to melt my heart.

"You're my only-"

"Pumpkin!" She pitched in. I nodded and kissed her head again.

"Time for Mommy's only pumpkin to go to sleep!" I sang.

"No…" She moaned, I nudged her bedroom door open and laid her down kissing her once more.

"Goodnight, Honey."

"Nighty night, Mommy." I tucked the comforter in around her and switched on her lava lamp before leaving her roo- scratch that. Before running into a wall.

It was dark…

Ellie giggled maniacally and I exited the room as hastily as possible. I returned to the kitchen to see the concerned faces of the doctor and his perfect wife.

"Are you alright, Bella? We heard your fall." She asked I nodded and thanked her for her concern. I sat in a chair next to Edward and scooted as close to him as possible, kissing his cheek and muttering, "I was kidding." He nodded and I twined my fingers with his, on his thigh.

"So where are you two from?"

"Wyoming." Edward said, he played with my fingers and my stomach fluttered because I knew the doctor and his Stepford wife couldn't see that. It was just us.

"Oh that is a lovely place I've been there."

"Oh it's not the state, Wyoming, Ohio." He corrected.

"Oh… never mind." She blushed and I laughed.

"So do you two live close by or is this just a house call?" I said looking at Hot Doc and trying not to make eyes at him. He was beautiful.

"No," he laughed. I don't know what the fuck he was saying no to. It wasn't a yes or no question. "We live across the street.

"I haven't seen you all around before," I pointed out.

"Well I've been out of town for a while and Carlisle has an apartment in town, closer to the hospital, he's usually there most of the time."

Was it wrong for me to assume that he's cheating? Yes? Fuck if I care.

"Oh honey, if you're going to work in the morning we should be going." She pointed out.

He nodded and stood shaking my hand and then Edward's, "It was nice meeting you all. We should get together again."

"Of course," Edward nodded and shook Mrs. Facinelli hand; she then turned and hugged me.

Yeah… Don't really know her like that…

I kind of cringed away from her but the relaxed into her hug. We walked them to the door and waved from the doorway.

"See you soon!" She called as she jaywalked with her husband.

I nodded and continued to wave until they were gone. I moved out of the door and Edward closed it before pulling me up into a hug.

"Um…"

"What the hell took you so long?" He asked pulling back and looking me in the eyes. His sharp green colored eyes pierced my own muddy brown ones.

"I was at James' house and we got caught by the maintenance man. No big deal." I murmured. His grip on my waist tightened.

"You were gone for hours. Kind of a big deal." He buried his nose in the crook of my neck and I sighed.

"What are you doing?"

He pulled back. "I don't know." He admitted.

I grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him to me so that our noses were touching, "If you want to take this somewhere. I'm all fucking for it. Don't get all weird on me though." I kissed his lips, once twice, three times and he pulled back.

"If we do this we can't just drop the case." I nodded and kissed him again while he continued to try to speak.

Can you blame me? He is fuck hot and so very lucky that I haven't already fucked him on the floor.

"Seriously, Bella if we can't contain ourselves l-long enough to focus on our jobs, I'm n-not going to continue with this," I kissed down his neck, god he had no clue how much I had been holding back.

"Stop talking and kiss me." He obeyed me and fused his lips with mine; he groped my ass and pushed me against the door.

Then he fell.

Ellie stood above him clutching her teddy bear. She had hit him in the back of both of his knees.

"You don't hurt, Mommy!" She screamed. I dropped to my knees, with tears streaming down my face.

Funniest shit ever.

"Edward she dropped your ass." I tossed my head back. And he yanked Ellie onto his chest. Blowing raspberries on her cheek, she giggled and called out to me. I pulled her out of Edwards grasp and she clung to me, giggling like mad. Edward pulled me to him and kissed my lips.

"Ew." Ellie groaned. She pushed our faces away and held us apart.

"Aren't you supposed to be prof-en-imal?"

"Professional? Goodnight, Ellie."

She poked Edward in the nose. "Keep your hands off my Mommy."

"Goodnight, Ellie!" He said tensely before swooping her up under his arm and taking her off to bed.

…JCE…

Hope you enjoyed and had some laughs!

Review! They are so greatly loved that I lose my mind! And klutz runs into things… Or falls off of chairs, stools and other objects that aren't moving… But that's a different story for a different time… :D Lets shoot for 120! I know you guys can do it!

Also… Klutz and I are thinking about changing the summary to something a little bit more interesting… It can be a quote or something straight out of your ass we would appreciate any help you give and will give you credit for your input! Thanks!