No pain was surrounding her as she woke up this time. It was a nice change for once. There was a hand covering hers and a face lying on the pillow next to hers. As she slowly opened her eyes, a bit of the pain she'd felt earlier leaked into her mind. The person she loved was sleeping on the pillow next to her, obviously she had fallen asleep while waiting for her to wake up.
Gail smiled, continuing to look at Holly's peaceful face.
"I can tell you're looking at me, you know." Holly mumbled and rubbed her eyes.
"I didn't mean to wake you. Sorry." Gail said and kissed Holly.
"Hmm... You have nothing to be sorry for. I would have woken up sooner or later." She said against Gail's lips. Gail smiled.
"That's true. I have been observing that fact for quite some while now, and have come to the conclusion that you are right." She said with a twinkle in her eye.
"You're starting to sound like me." Holly said.
"You say that as if that's a bad thing." Gail said and kissed her once again. Holly grew quiet. Gail looked questionably at her.
"What?" She asked at last.
"I nearly lost you today." Holly said. She took Gail's hand in her own again. Gail paled when she remembered.
"Hey, are you okay? Are you in pain? I can call the nurse." Holly said, seeing the change in her girlfriends face immediately.
"No, I'm not in pain. Not that kind of pain at least. Have you heard anything about McNally?" She asked, looking pleadingly at Holly.
"No, babe, we haven't. I'm so sorry." She answered and kissed Gail's hand. "Dov told me what happened." She continued.
"Yeah. It was awful, Holly. I just left her there, all by herself in that chair." Gail said, tears running down her cheeks.
"Hey, none of this is your fault okay. It's the bastard who took you's fault, but certainly not yours." Holly said.
"My brain knows that. My heart is a different story." Gail answered. She knew that she was acting out of character and that that was most likely scaring Holly. She blamed it on the pain meds that they were giving her.
"It's gonna be okay." Holly whispered, over and over again, rocking Gail as well as she could with Gail being in the hospital bed and Holly sitting in the chair. Gail scooted over and patted on the bed beside her. Holly jumped up and stretched out beside her. Without another word, she folded her arms around Gail and held her until she fell asleep. Then, finally, she could relax as well and a few minutes late, she was also asleep again.
Everybody was screaming. Jules was screaming at her team to get in there. Sam was screaming at Nick to hold on to the other Sam and stay outside. Spike was screaming at Nick as well. Leah was screaming at Jules, asking if she was okay.
Those few milliseconds where she hadn't been able to do anything except thinking that it was unfair were over as fast as they had come. Jules drew her weapon faster than ever before and trained it on the man with the gun, Hugh she assumed. He kept pointing the gun at her. She could hear Andy struggling to take breaths behind her. At least that meant that she was still alive.
"Leah. Do you have the shot?" Jules asked calmly. Much more calmly than she felt.
"Yeah." Leah answered, just as calm. The screaming match was over and Jules could hear her husband and Joey move down the stairs. They opened the door just as Jules was moving over to McNally to see how grave her injuries were.
"Sam, Joey, take care of them." Was all Jules said before she moved over to McNally who was still struggling for her breath. It is a good sign. It's a good sign. Jules kept reminding herself, hearing those painful breaths, when she finally looked at the woman before her.
Andy McNally was in pain. The pain was worse than anything she had ever felt before. With one exception.
It's funny, she thought, that it hurts more to see your loved ones hurt than to be hurt yourself. Because, of course, the one exception was that day when Sam had been shot. That had hurt Andy on so many levels. And now this pain that she was feeling right now, this all consuming pain was only on a physical level. That was one out of the hundreds that had hurt when Sam had gotten shot.
She could see that moment flashing before her eyes now. That moment along with all the other moments in her life. But she had had a good life. She had found love, and that was all that she would ever need. It was okay to let go now. So just as she saw a woman's face hovering above her body, tears streaking down the woman's face, she decided to stop fighting. It wasn't really a decision and if she could, she would have chosen differently, but she was okay with that. She was okay with dying.