A/N: Sorry this chapter is a day late. On that note, I'm going to move from weekly updates to biweekly from now on, because as much as I'm enjoying writing this I also have other things going on in my life. Anyway, this chapter marks another big turning point, so... well, here it is!
It was a good life, living with Tracy, even though Meredith knew it couldn't last. Before long, they developed a system to make things run more smoothly. Until Meredith found a job (Tracy's words, not hers-Meredith wasn't sure if she'd ever find a job) she needed something to keep herself busy while Tracy was at work. As such, before Tracy left for work, she would leave Meredith a bit of money to spend as needed during the day, along with a short list of chores for her to do. The chores were mostly simple things, like dusting the furniture in the living room or tidying up the kitchen counters, or going out to pick up groceries. Meredith would usually put on music while cleaning the house, and although Tracy's CD collection was a little sparse and mostly not exactly in line with Meredith's tastes (not a single country CD to be found, for christ's sake) listening to music always made the work go quicker. Occasionally Meredith would sing along, even though she wasn't very good. Wasn't like anybody was listening, she figured, so why not?
"Nobody, nobody, nobody~" Meredith crooned along to the music coming from the CD played as she put groceries away in the refrigerator. "Ooh, nobody, nobody, nobody…"
She tried not to think about how the lyrics might have related to Tracy's life, tried not to picture her hunched up in her bedroom playing this song and crying as she thought about how isolated she felt. Tracy probably wouldn't actually do that, anyhow. And besides, whatever isolation she felt couldn't have been that bad. She had all those friends she was always talking about-including Claire and Noah, and although Meredith wasn't too familiar with the rest of the crowd, anyone her daughter elected to hang around with must have been a decent enough person. Maybe not that Sylar fellow, though-why was he in their group chat again, anyway?
Once Tracy came home, she would tell Meredith about any highlights of her day (turned out you met all sorts of fascinating characters working at a swimming pool). They'd lounge around for a while and then make supper together. Tracy was… not a bad cook, per se, but her expertise was limited. She could make some wicked appetizers, and she was very efficient at chopping vegetables, but everything she made came out very undercooked, and she never used enough seasoning. She was abysmal at flipping pancakes, too, not that that particular issue cropped up too often (Tracy usually had cereal with berries and yogurt for breakfast, and Meredith was content with some peanut butter toast).
"See, you just hold the frying pan like this," Meredith instructed her once as delicious-smelling batter sizzled in the pan, placing a guiding hand on Tracy's wrist. "And then…"
Tracy let out a grunt of effort as she twitched her wrist upward, sending the pancake flying up into the air. She moved to catch it as it fell; it landed with a splat on the edge of the pan, sending batter flying up. A drop of batter hit Meredith on the cheek and she giggled despite herself, wiping it off and popping it in her mouth. Tracy poked the pancake back onto the pan, wincing as she did so. The pan sizzled as ice spread over the handle.
"Here, sweetie, let me take that," Meredith said quickly, taking the icy handle and briefly activating her own powers just enough to warm it back up. "Now, do you want to try again?"
"Oh, I don't know…" Tracy bit her lip and looked at the batter splattered on the previously immaculate marble countertop. "Maybe I'm just bad at this."
"Nonsense," Meredith chided as she slid the now-cooked pancake onto a plate. It was a little burnt and pretty misshapen, but it would do. "Nobody's 'just bad' at anything, hon. You've just gotta set your mind to it and try."
Tracy smiled and nodded, rolling up her sleeves and reaching for the bowl of batter. "Thanks for being so patient with me," she said as she spooned some more batter into the pan.
"Oh, no need to thank me," Meredith said, and she meant it. "It's the least I can do after all you're doing for me."
Sitting down to eat together was nice, too-really nice. So did sitting together in the living room, doing their own thing but still silently appreciating each other's company. Sometimes they even stood together at the sink while brushing their teeth. The whole thing was so painfully domestic that it almost felt odd going to seperate beds at the end of the day and waking up alone in the morning. Even so, knowing that Tracy was sleeping somewhere else in the same house brought a warm flutter to Meredith's chest. She didn't understand it at all, but feeling this happy for a change was really nice, so Meredith certainly wasn't going to complain about the strange feelings brewing inside her.
Whenever Tracy had a day off, she would take Meredith out someplace, whether it was clothes shopping or to get lunch together. She sprinkled the occasional prompts to apply for a job into their conversations, but she always dropped it quickly enough. Sometimes one of their powers accidentally flared up, but Meredith could thaw most things Tracy froze and Tracy could cool down whatever Meredith burnt. That didn't mean those things would be usable afterwards, mind you, but what really mattered was that they could warm up and cool down each other as well. Their powers complimented each other perfectly-almost like they were meant to be together.
One evening, after doing a workout on Tracy's exercise bike, Meredith went to take a shower. She hadn't heard Tracy come home, and she was so burnt out from her workout that she didn't take the time to look out the window and check the driveway for her car before stepping into the bathroom. This quickly proved to be a mistake. A shriek split the air and Meredith's eyes widened as her gaze fell on Tracy, sitting completely naked in the bathtub with her knees drawn up to her chest. Water droplets glistened on her bare skin, and although her position meant Meredith couldn't see too much, the sight still sent a furious heat into her cheeks. This heat quickly spread over the rest of her skin, and her hands erupted into flame as she turned to cover her eyes.
Tracy clambered out of the tub and rushed over to help, grabbing her hands and turning her own hands to water to extinguish the flame. Meredith kept her eyes wrenched shut, but the heat didn't subside. Instead, her powers flared up even more strongly as Tracy's body pressed up against her own. Tracy swore under her breath and scrambled away. When Meredith reopened her eyes, Tracy had hastily wrapped a towel around herself and was fumbling with the showerhead. After switching the water temperature down to cold, she pointed the nozzle at Meredith and switched it on.
The water felt like a thousand tiny needles as they pelted her. Hissing, Meredith stumbled backward; Tracy dropped the showerhead and rushed to catch her.
"Are you okay?"
Meredith could hardly hear the question over the sound of her own heart hammering and the blood rushing in her ears. Tracy reached up to brush a wayward strand of hair out of Meredith's flushed face as she stared down at her with wide, concerned eyes. She wasn't flinching at all, so the fire must have died down, but Meredith's cheeks were still burning.
"...Uh," Meredith said as she snapped back to attention. "Um, yeah, Trace. I'm fine."
"Trace?" Tracy echoed, a faint blush appearing on her cheeks. "That's… um, is that a nickname?"
Meredith shrugged, doing her best to play it cool despite the pounding of her heart and the persisting warmth in her face. "Yeah, I figured it'd be cute," she mumbled. "Is that okay?"
"Oh, yeah, it's fine."
"Good," said Meredith. It came out softer and more breathy than she'd intended. Her gaze flickered back down to Tracy's dripping-wet body, barely concealed by the towel, and her already furiously pounding heart skipped a beat. Damn, what's wrong with me?
"Meredith," Tracy murmured, drawing Meredith's gaze back up from her figure and to her eyes. They were wide with some unreadable emotion, scanning Meredith intently. "Are you okay?"
They drew a little closer to each other, as though being pulled together like magnets. Meredith could feel Tracy's breath on her cheek. Blood roared in Meredith's ears as their bodies brushed up against each other, and a pleasant tingling sensation spread through her body. At their sides, Tracy's hands flickered from flesh to water and back again, her fingers interlocking with Meredith's. It would be so easy to close the distance between them, so easy to plant a kiss to those slightly parted lips…
In that moment, it was like everything slid into place, just like the way their hands slid into each other with intertwined fingers. It was more than gratitude that Meredith felt. She felt the same way about Tracy that Nathan had once felt about both of them. She was attracted to her-maybe even in love.
Meredith drew in a sharp breath and pulled back, tearing herself away from Tracy and letting go of her hands. Head spinning, she stammered out some excuse about feeling sick and ran down the hall to her guestroom. She locked the door behind her, sat down onto her bed, and took a deep breath. Okay, so she had a thing for Tracy. So, what now? It wasn't like anything was going to come of it-if Tracy swung that way she would've said something about it-so it would be best to just ignore it. She had ignored it before, with the cute girl who had sat beside her in her high school art class with the brown hair that was always cascading over her hunched-over shoulders as she'd scribbled in her sketchbook. She had ignored it with the girl on her college track team with muscles that repelled the boys but which Meredith had practically drooled over at every track meet. She had even ignored it with her former coworker whose snug-fitting work uniform had accentuated all her curves just so. If it had worked then, it would work now, so Meredith just had to ignore it. Of course, those other women hadn't been living in the same house as her… but she had managed to live four years with her college roommate without falling for her, so maybe if she was lucky these feelings would just simmer down after a while and go away on their own.
A few minutes later, Tracy knocked on her door.
"Meredith, are you okay?" she asked. Meredith didn't respond. "Let me in, okay? Please."
Again, Meredith didn't respond. What could she possibly say? Even so, it would be rude to just ignore her, so she stood up and walked across the room to open the door. Tracy, now fully clothed but still unfairly beautiful, stood on the other side. Meredith blushed, and now she finally understood why. It was stupid of her not to have realized it before, really. She'd known for years that she wasn't one hundred percent straight, but it had been so long since she'd felt this way about a woman. She had thought maybe she'd finally trained it out of herself, but apparently not.
"I'm fine," Meredith said, forcing her face into a smile to reassure Tracy. "Can you leave me alone for a while, though? I'm just a bit tired. I think I'm going to take a rest."
"Alright," said Tracy, her eyes crinkling in confusion. "Do you want to help me cook dinner tonight, or…?"
Meredith shook her head. Being so close to Tracy would be too hard to handle right now. It was best she keep her distance for a while, until her newfound unwanted feelings subsided. A frown flickered onto Tracy's face for a moment, but she banished it and put on a smile that didn't reach her eyes.
"Oh, okay, then," she said. "I'll just leave you to your own devices."
I'm pushing her away again, Meredith thought, guilt worming in her belly as Tracy backed away and shut the door behind her. As though there was any doubt that I'm still an awful person. Letting out a long, heavy sigh, Meredith flopped backwards onto her bed and stared vacantly up at the ceiling, wondering why her heart would go and betray her like that.