I think the flow on this one is icky but well... it was interesting to attempt.

Sephiroth checked the ham baking in the brick oven on the porch. Everything was going quite smoothly and he turned away from the oven to look out through the screening. He had hoped that there would be some activity to temporarily distract him but there was not. Taking the few steps toward the screened side of the back deck, he tried to somehow settle his jumbled thoughts.

Riku's surprise gift had indeed been a complete shock. It had taken him a moment to process and then another to decide if he was happy about the situation or not. He had truly set in his mind that he would never see her again…

He heard the back door open slowly but did not glance over. He knew who it was before she even spoke. "Hey, there."

Sephiroth turned his head. Natalia stood nervously near the door, tucking some of her lengthy bangs behind an ear. The woman's expression was carefully neutral but her brandy-colored eyes where deeply concerned. It troubled Sephiroth a great deal to see it.

"Did Zack finally stop talking?" The silver-haired man asked, moving his body to face her.

"No, he's moved on to embarrassing Cloud." She smiled weakly. "You left rather abruptly, I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I know how you dislike these large gatherings and then to have me just suddenly pop up…"

"I needed to check on the ham," Sephiroth explained.

"Ah," Natalia clearly did not really believe him but she did not call him on it and simply walked over to sit upon the patio tabletop. She set her feet on the bench and placed her hands on her knees. "You know, when Riku and Cloud came, I was actually glad you weren't with them."

Sephiroth lifted a thin eyebrow. That statement… hurt. She did not want to see him again? Then why was she here? When he had entered the living room and found her sitting on the sofa with the dogs, she had looked at him with so much joy. He would have sworn she was happy.

As if reading his thoughts, she quickly rushed on. "It isn't that I didn't want to see you. I was just… afraid, I guess."

"Afraid?" That did not sit well with him. He did not think that he had given reason to be afraid. He did not want Natalia to fear him.

"Yeah," Natalia took a breath. "When the two of you left, I set it in my mind that I was never going to see either of you again. If you read my letter, then you have some idea of how I felt at the time."

Sephiroth nodded once. Yes, he had read that letter. It was kept in a special place among his few belongings. It had hurt him to read what had been written.

"It was especially hard to lose you." The dark-haired woman bit her lower lip. "You came to mean… a great deal to me. It took a long time to really accept that you weren't coming back but somehow I knew that you weren't of my world, it wasn't much of a shock when Riku confirmed that. I knew that I had been blessed and privileged to know you for the short time I did."

Glancing up, Natalia smiled lightly. "I missed you."

Sephiroth felt his chest tighten a touch. It had been hard for him to leave her as well and he still did at random times start wondering what she was doing. It was usually when he saw something that reminded him of her that he would get that peculiar ache in his chest.

"Any way, it was a shock when Riku showed up at the shop. It took me a minute to believe it was really him." She laughed softly, rocking slightly. "It must have been quite the scene to the few customers there. Cloud was everything I expected from everything both you and Riku said about him. It's so obvious how much they love one another."

"It is," Sephiroth agreed. "I've always been thankful that Riku has what I never could."

The pair fell quiet and Sephiroth was uncertain how to continue with this conversation. He felt like he was skirting around what he really wanted to say but he did not know what that was. It seemed that even Natalia was unsure of where this was going.

Natalia suddenly shivered and rubbed her arms. Even though she was wearing jeans and a heavy sweater, it was quite cold and a chilled wind occasionally made it through the screens. Sephiroth was only in dark pants and a red t-shirt but he never had been temperature sensitive.

Quite unaware of his own actions, he came over and sat beside her on the wood. Hesitantly, he slipped his arm around her shoulders. He was surprised and oddly pleased when she instinctively snuggled into his side. He told himself she only did to absorb the heat that came off of him but then she sighed contently and he felt an unfamiliar warmth spread through him.

After sitting like this for several minutes, Natalia shifted but did not leave his side. Her voice was soft and there was a gentle quality to it. "Riku told me everything."

Sephiroth stiffened slightly.

She placed a hand against his chest in a reassuring manner. "You are… an amazing man, Sephiroth. I understand why Riku felt it necessary to tell me the truth about what the two of you are but he didn't have to. Knowing your history doesn't change how I feel about you."

"Natalia…"

"I know," she cut him off. She pulled slightly away and studied his eyes for a long moment. The hand on his chest rose up to push back some of his bangs and she smiled at him. Her eyes were sad but accepting. "I know how things have to be but, my reasoning is probably very different than yours."

Sephiroth looked at her in confusion. He did not understand how she could be so calm about this. If she knew about him, who and what he was, why was she still here? If she knew what he had done and what he was capable of, why had she not stayed away?

Natalia dropped her hand and placed it on his leg. "I don't care who you were. Back then, you were an incomplete person desperately looking for something. Now, you have family and people who love you.

"Even if you did have a relapse, gave in to the monster that lives on through you, it wouldn't be the same as before. I truly believe that even if you had a slip up, you'd come back before you did anything truly terrible." Taking a breath, she gazed into Sephiroth's feline eyes. "These things don't bother me nearly as much as they probably should."

Sephiroth returned her gaze, somehow understanding what she meant. He was only partially surprised that he was able to accept her words as truth. Everything about Natalia always spoke of sincerity.

"The real reason we could never be more than friends is simply this," she sighed and appeared apologetic. "I don't want to leave my world. I love my home and while knowing that there are other ones out there is exciting, I have no desire to see any of them. I almost said no when Riku and Cloud invited me for Christmas. However, my longing to see you and find out how you were doing was too great so I said yes."

She glanced down and looked at where her hand rested on his leg. "And you belong here with Riku and the rest of your family. I believe that now even more firmly than when you left. Everyone here is so close it's amazing. This is your home and where you should be. Unfortunately, that doesn't leave much room for anything but friendship because any other relationship would have no future."

She went quiet again and Sephiroth searched frantically for something to say. She was right on all points but his heart was pained to hear it. He honestly could not say what it was he had hoped for but he was sad that he could not have it. Conversely, he was glad to know that she wanted to remain his friend.

He brought the hand on her shoulder down to her arm and turned her a bit. She looked up at him questioningly but did not ask what he was doing. It was quite on impulse that he drew her closer and dropped his head.

He did not think about it when he kissed her gently. He ignored the extremely faint feeling that this was somehow wrong and simply let himself enjoy this one brief moment. When she began to return the kiss, that swelling in his heart returned and though he realized they would never have more than this, it was enough.

After an immeasurable span of time they broke apart, spring-green eyes gazing into brandy. Neither spoke yet everything the felt was being said. It was one of those endless moments that Sephiroth had heard about but never fathomed he would experience for himself.

He brushed at her cheek once and smiled lightly. "I'm glad you decided to come."

"So am I," Natalia grinned.

Taking a breath, he rubbed her arm and began to stand up. "You need to get back inside before you freeze."

She followed him up, somehow not leaving the shell of his warmth. He hugged her tightly and she snuggled happily against him. It was a shame that they were both able to be practical about this because he knew he could very likely fall in love with this woman.

Feeling someone watching them, he flicked his eyes up to find Riku, Zack and Sora peering through the kitchen blinds. As soon as they spotted him looking, they scurried away but he knew they had seen everything. Eventually, he would have to explain to them the situation but for now, he would let them think whatever they wanted.

"Merry Christmas, Sephiroth," Natalia murmured against his chest.

He kissed the top of her head and rubbed her back. "Happy Christmas, Natalia."