Harry

Oh my god. My poor baby…

Fuck.

"Merlin. Draco, what happened?" Draco just cries. "Draco, look at me." He looks up into my eyes. I have to ask. "Is it him? The therapist?" So help me if it is I'm going to kill the fucker. He shakes his head.

"No." He says in a thick voice. "No it was some… death eater that used to watch me. D-dolohov, I th-think." I hold onto him tightly. He needs to talk about this. I don't want to hear it. But he needs to say it.

Draco

I just relax into Harry's arms, staring out at the lake, crying. He's going to make me tell him. I've never told anyone. But as I sit here and cry like a child, I realise that I have no reason not to tell other than the fact that just thinking about it is painful enough to bring me to tears. Then again, everything does. I watch the water lap up on the edge of the grass, thinking.

Harry's been my first everything.

The first one to know I'm gay.

My first kiss. With a boy anyway.

My first true relationship.

The first person that's ever given a damn about me.

The first person that's ever said they love me.

The first person to know I cut myself.

The first person to see me cry since I started Hogwarts.

The first person who's ever, ever comforted me.

The first one to understand my pain.

The first one to know about father.

So why shouldn't he be the first person to know about Dolohov?

Simple. I'm terrified. And as I realise how afraid I am, I start shaking. Trembling. Harry notices this and attempts to hold me closer. I hide my face in his shoulder for a moment, telling myself to get it together. It ended three years ago. It's over. I need to calm down.

"Draco," Harry says, breaking what had previously been silence aside from the water lapping at the edges and the sounds of my crying. "Draco, you know you need to talk about this." I sniff. I nod into his shirt, and breathe in his scent. He smells wonderful.

I pull back and look into his eyes.

"I don't know if I can." I whisper.

Harry

I take a deep breath and lightly wipe the tears from his beautiful, pale skin. When it comes to suicide, and cutting, I know how to help. Because I've been there before. But… R-R…

Fuck it.

I won't even think the word. When it comes to this, I have no idea what to do. What to say. How to help.

"Draco, baby, you need to. You'll feel better to have it out there. Please." I try. "What happened to you?" He chokes on a small sob.

"I was only twelve, Harry!" He chokes "A second year!" I breathe deeply again, feeling sick. I bring him closer, so he's nearly sitting on my lap, and run my fingers through his hair. I feel his body shaking, both from tears and the memory itself. I stare into his pale grey eyes and see the fear living there.

"It's okay baby." I whisper as he cries. "It's okay."

Draco takes a moment to calm down. After a few minutes silence he moves so that he's sitting cross-legged in front of me, and so that his knees are touching mine. He looks, calmly but timidly into my eyes, tears streaming down his face, and takes a deep breath.

"When I was younger…" He starts quietly. "And father would leave…" He sniffs and wipes at his cheeks, though the tears keep falling. "He'd leave one of his friends home with me. To watch me." I grab both his hands. "They were usually Death Eaters." He sniffs again.

"Take your time, Draco." I say softly. He takes breaths deep and looks into my eyes for reassurance.

"During the winter holidays… second year." He says slowly. And I see the pain seep across his face. "D-Dolahov… came." He breaks off and for a moment I don't think he's going to be able to continue. "He… s-started… t-touching… me." he croaks out. He starts crying harder. "I couldn't shove him off!" I pull him to my chest.

"I tried and tried." he mumbles. "I sc-screamed I cried I kicked and he… he w-wouldn't s-stop." I let him cry and when he's coherent enough to speak again he pulls back. I kiss his lips softly in the hopes to calm him down. He sniffs.

"He kept coming back, Harry." He says quietly. "Until I was fourteen. He kept coming back."

Draco

I move over so I'm no longer sitting in front of Harry but beside him, and cuddle up as close to him as I can get, surprisingly exhausted from telling him. I'm still crying.

"He did everything to me." I whisper. Harry keeps an arm wrapped tightly around me.

"It's okay, baby." He whispers back, and I notice his voice is choked. "It's okay now. It's over." I sniff, wishing desperately that I could stop these tears.

"How do you know?" I ask, desperate for the answer. "You can't know that."

"I won't let him hurt you, Draco." There's pure passion in his voice. "I promise." I just cuddle closer and he cuddles back. After a moment of nearly contented silence Harry speaks again.

"That's why you get so freaked out if I dominate you isn't it." I nod, blinking back fresh tears.

"I-it reminds me… of… him." I say slowly. "I'm so scared Harry." I whisper. "Father… and… him. Snape. Why do they all hate me? What's wrong with me?" I notice silent tears slip down Harry's face now.

"There's nothing wrong with you." He says firmly, looking me straight in the eyes. "It's them. It's all them and they don't deserve to live." I wipe at my cheeks and shake my head.

"No." I don't believe him. "H-he told me I d-deserve I-it. S-said it was m-my fault. I must have done something wrong." Harry keeps his arms wrapped around me, leans close, and whispers in my ear.

"Don't ever think that, Draco. Don't ever, ever say that. It's not true. It was never true."

I don't say anything, but simply lay back in his arms, waiting to stop crying. Waiting to stop shaking. I feel so safe in his arms.

"Don't you feel better having said it?" He asks me softly. I nod. Surprisingly, I do. It's not a secret anymore…

Harry

We stay like that, staring out at the lake for a while, until I look down at my watch and realise that it's almost noon. Draco is still curled up against me, lost in some sort of reverie, looking nearly content with himself. I smile to myself. Saving him was the best decision I ever made.

"Draco," I say softly. He looks at me, a slightly startled expression on his face. "Draco, the Dursley's will be up by now." I look around me and almost laugh at the expression on a muggle man's face. I've grown used to the strange looks we receive from wizards and muggles alike. It doesn't bother me anymore. I smile at the man and lean over to kiss Draco, just to see what he'd do. He glares.

Screw him and all his homophobic friends. The world is a happier place without them.

"I don't want to go back to the house." Draco whines, though he's positively grinning in reaction to my kiss.

"I know." I say with a sigh. "I don't want to go back either." I kiss him again. I love seeing him smile like that. "But we have to."

"Fine." He attempts to pout, but again, can't manage to do so through the smile on his face. I stand up and grab his hand to help him to his feet.

I don't let go of his hand and we start walking back to the house. I'll never really know how much the talk helped him, but looking at him, he seems as though he's had a bit of weight lifted from his shoulders. Glancing at his arms though, I wince. I've learned the hard way not to assume that he's okay. He's fragile. Delicate. Sensitive. He's my baby and I love him.

Draco

Harry won't ever know how much it means to me that he'd kiss me like that in front of so many people. Like he didn't care what they'd think. He loves me enough that it doesn't matter to him who disapproves… I don't know what I'd do without him.

Well, actually, I do.

I wouldn't be alive. We arrive back to Harry's house and I drop his hand as we approach the front door. We walk into the kitchen to have Harry's entire family completely ignore us. I'm okay with that. I also notice that Dudley has that arsehole Piers over.

I stop to get a glass of water, grateful that I threw a sweater on over my cuts this morning. Piers starts banging the drawers around, looking for something.

"Dammit Dudley, where are your effing knives?" I wince, and refuse to make eye contact with him. Dudley gets up from the table and waddles over to the fridge. From the top of the fridge he pulls a single kitchen knife. I stand on my toes trying to see if the rest of the knives are up there. They're not.

Harry gives me a look, seeming to realise what I was trying to do.

Dudley hands the knife to Piers.

"Why the fuck is that up there?" Dudley smirks and I wrap my arms around myself, knowing what's coming.

"Emo boy over there." Dudley sniggers, gesturing to me. I walk out of the room. I don't want to hear this. Harry follows closely.

"You okay?" I take a deep breath.

"Yeah. Yeah I'm fine. It doesn't matter what they think."

Harry

I smile, surprised at how much Draco's reaction relieves me. He's not letter Pier's comments get to him. And though I won't let myself get my hopes up, I know that maybe,

He's one step closer to getting better.

Special shout out to rohda, angst kitten, xxSarahUnlovedxx, Draco and Hermione is like PBJ, Bellakins08, PrincessAyla1994, Dramione1996, Holly Alice, DarkestAngel13, butterfly1415, The Dagdah's Priestess, PeruvianDarkness, .star and the rest of you who have reviewed nearly every chapter so far. You guys rock. If I missed your name and you have been reviewing every chapter, I apologise, I haven't forgotten you, you're what keeps this story going. When I can recognise the style of who's reviewing, BEFORE I look at the screen name, I know I've got some pretty devoted reviewers. Keep reviewing please. J I love you all. 3