"You look like a sad librarian," Dell comments without looking up from the mirror, painting a smoky black line across her eyelid.
Maura's eyes dart up from her book, her cheeks flashing pink. She doesn't know how to respond, as she tugs nervously at her beige cardigan. Dell isn't in the room often, but when she is, it leaves Maura flustered.
"You should come out with me tonight." She doesn't pose it as an option. She turns from the mirror, smacking her lips together, a savage shade of red. Dell is a delightfully exotic blend of Filipino and Italian, plucked right out of the pages of a Victoria's Secret catalogue.
"I have a lot of reading to complete," Maura answers, focusing her eyes back on her book.
"It's Friday night!" Dell rolls her eyes, ruffling her mess of curls, before landing her gaze on Maura once again. "You have all weekend, not to mention the fact that you must be at least eighty chapters ahead already with the time you spend holed up in this room."
"I can't." Maura's voice is small. An overwhelming part of her fights to say yes, but her reason wins.
"I'm approaching this entirely wrong," Dell mutters, more to herself than to Maura. She crosses the room, rummaging through her closet for a moment, before producing a red, strappy dress. "Look, you can't hide that gorgeous bod behind a cardigan forever. I know for a fact that this would look fucking fantastic on you. It pains me to see you put such potential to waste." She holds it out to Maura.
Maura's face now matches the dress as her heart slams violently against her rib cage. 'Gorgeous.' The word reverberates in her mind. She looks at Dell's wry grin, before bravely snatching the dress.
"I'll try it on," she barters, feeling a rush of adrenaline pump through her body, not like anything she has ever quite felt before. "But that doesn't mean I'm going out."
XXX
She smooths her eyebrows in the mirror. Adjusts her shirt. Applies a hearty spray of perfume because she literally smells like a dead body. Re-parts her hair. Practices a smile.
She must say, she looks quite nice for spending the better portion of her day elbow deep in the bowels of a corpse. (A mundane day of paperwork never stays that way for long). It's almost seven, and she hates that she continues this cruel habit of treating every outing with Jane like a date.
She applies a coat of red lipstick anyway.
It's seven on the dot when she walks into the Robber, scanning the booths for Jane. Her stomach drops all the way down to her toes when she realizes Jane is not alone. Maura steps toward the table, cautiously, wounded.
"Hey, Maur," Jane answers when Maura has reached the table. "This is Casey, my, um..."
"Fiancé," the man interjects. His hair is cropped short, and he's still in his uniform. "You think you'd be used to introducing me as that by now, babe."
"Sorry, still getting used to it." Jane mumbles, her voice so soft it feels uncharacteristic.
"Have a seat," Casey smiles, though it doesn't reach his eyes.
Maura does, though her legs feel like lead as she positions herself across from them. She reaches for a menu, gripping it tightly, as she searches desperately for Jane's eyes.
"I hope you don't mind Casey joining us," Jane apologizes, picking a scab on her wrist, as if she's intentionally avoiding eye contact. "He finished early at the base today."
"No, no, not at all!" Maura lies, itching her neck nervously.
"I've heard a lot about you," Casey takes a swig of beer.
Maura can't say the same. She manages a strained smile.
"Only good things, of course," Jane darts her eyes up for a split second, briefly catching Maura's.
It's terrible. It's so incredibly terrible that Maura regrets coming at all. Because she cannot think of a single thing to say. And it reminds her of just how unnecessary she really is. It hurts more than she expected it to, even though her hoping had been futile all along.
She watches them. She doesn't like the way that Jane can't sit still or the way he calls her 'babe.' There's something possessive about the way he looks at her, the way he touches her hand after he notices Maura staring at her for too long. She gulps her wine, because it's the only comforting motion she can think to do.
"Gonna run to the bathroom," Jane announces, before they even have a chance to order. Maura's almost on her feet, immediately ready to join her, when she realizes that Jane might need a minute alone. She's never quite been able to convince herself she's not a perpetual inconvenience. She taps the table lightly with her nails. She finishes her wine.
"I, um, I'm suddenly not feeling so well," she mutters, not a lie. She feels a little dizzy as she rises from the booth. "Tell Jane I'm sorry I had to leave."
Casey nods, though doesn't protest.
XXX
She's fighting tears as she fumbles with the key to her apartment.
There's no reason for you to be crying, the practical part of her brain reminds her, though she doesn't even make it over the doormat before her vision becomes too blurry. She slides down the back of the door, hitting the floor with a pathetic thud as she buries her face in her knees, gasping quietly as she sobs silently.
She wants Ian right now, the closest thing she has to a best friend. She wants him, because he's very good at making her forget. But Ian's not here, so she she pages through her contacts, bubbling with frustration, but she realizes that they are only names. Instead, she crawls into bed, feeling defeated.
She sleeps with the light on; it makes her feel less alone.
A/N: First of all, thank you so much for the feedback! It's so nice to know I have interested readers even after all this time. I know the dinner scene might not have been exactly what you were expecting, but it was necessary to introduce Casey to the story. There are some tender Rizzles moments in the very near future though. Also, a question for you guys. Are you enjoying this strictly from Maura's POV? I do plan to keep it just from her POV, especially because ten chapters in would be an awkward time to introduce Jane's POV, but I do realize at times it is limiting just to see what Maura is thinking. But I do want to know what you guys think.