Grissom regarded her carefully as she tried to compose her already ragged emotions. He watched her with seemingly new eyes, his feelings for her intensifying with these new chain of events.
"I'll take you home," he told her softly, slipping a comforting arm loosely around her shoulders.
"You don't have to do that," she sighed, lifting her eyes to his briefly before dropping them again. "Anyway, you don't have your car here."
"Oh," Grissom mumbled, his temporary memory loss rearing inside his mind, cursing the moment. "Okay, we'll improvise. I'll call us a cab."
"No, look," she sighed, fighting to keep her treacherous emotions from succeeding in releasing the tears in her eyes. "I'm fine, I can walk. Really, it's okay."
"Then I'll walk with you," he told her, a small smile creeping to his lips as he dropped his hand to the small of her back.
Sara gulped down the burning lump in her throat when he gently pushed her forward, urging her to trust him. "I'll just let Brass know we're leaving."
Nodding slowly, she focused on the floor beneath her feet, counting the tiny speckled patterns in the gray tiles. Christmas day was literally only a few hours away and soon the streets would be filled with party revelers and kids with their parents, showing off their new bikes and toys. Sighing heavily, Sara closed her eyes briefly against the childhood memories that had seemed to disintegrate over the years. Maybe she should call her family when she got home, just to say hello.
"Hey," Grissom smiled when he returned to her side, his warmth seeping into her tired body. "You ready?"
"Yeah," she nodded, offering him a tentative smile before beginning the walk beside him. She struggled to find something to say to him, anything to let him know that just his being here meant the world to her, but she remained silent.
Stepping out into the cool morning breeze, Sara looked up into the cloudy sky. The rain from earlier had all but gone to leave a sheen of sparkling pools over the sidewalk. The sun was peeking slightly out from behind the clouds, casting filtering rays of light to warm the air around them slightly.
Shoving her hands in her pocket, Sara started down the hospital steps, feeling Grissom's presence beside her. Chancing a brief glance in his direction, she noticed that he mimicked her movements, his own hands in his pockets and deep in thought. This man had caused her more pain than anyone she had ever known, yet she still couldn't deny the flutter of her heart, or the magnetic pull of his presence whenever he was near her. She had to accept the fact that he would always hold her heart, and nothing, or no one could replace him.
Looking up, Grissom caught her eyes on him and was suddenly struck by how much he needed her with him. She had shown him a side of herself that he had never seen before, and her ability to lose herself in the depth of emotion she had been displaying over these last few hours only strengthened the already growing feelings inside him. "You okay?" he asked quietly when she quickly averted her eyes.
"I…" she started, losing her voice just as quickly. Taking a breath, she stopped walking, her movements bringing his own to a halt. "Why are you doing this?" she asked softly, finding the courage to search the blue depths of his eyes.
Grissom was suddenly struck dumb, unable to find the words to explain how much he wanted to be with her right now. Lifting a hand from his pocket, he reached out to push an errant strand of hair from her eyes. He felt her stiffen with his touch, her shock quickly melting into heartfelt fear and then into sorrow. She had shown him a myriad of emotions, displaying them openly, only to hide behind her defensive walls again. "Sara," he started, his voice aching with regret as he spoke. "I want to apologize for my behavior towards you. I need you to understand."
"I do understand," she whispered, averting her eyes from his piercing gaze. "I made a mistake, a huge mistake...I thought…" Shaking her head, she forced an empty smile to her lips, keeping up the pretense that everything was fine. "You don't have to do this. I can walk by myself, really, it's okay."
"Sara," he urged, stepping closer to her as he spoke. "I want to walk with you."
"Great," she sighed, turning away from him, resuming her steady pace with him at her side. They strode on in silence, the tension between them mounting with every step that took them closer to Sara's apartment block. She could feel him beside her, his mere presence showering her body with need, but she pushed it away. Why wouldn't her heart listen to her mind?
Grissom was waging a war inside himself. His heart wanted to tell her his feelings, but his logical brain persisted in reminding him of all the reasons why he shouldn't want her. Finally, battling down the resistance, he took a chance and decided to act on impulse. "Okay stop," he muttered quickly, his hands reaching out to pull her to a standstill beside him. He watched her eyes question him, the sadness in her deep brown pools only providing him with more reasons why he had to do this. He swallowed the fear that ached to claim him as he tentatively placed his hands on either side of her face, relieved that she didn't shy away from his touch. "What are you going to do when you get home?"
Sara's shocked gasp caused him to take another step closer to her, so close that his body heat danced around hers enticingly. She had seemed to lose all power of speech, her eyes mesmerized by the depth of feeling that mirrored in his. "I…"
"Would you like to spend Christmas day with me?" He was surprised at how his fear had suddenly melted away and left him stronger. Taking matters into his own hands, he stroked her cheek with his thumb. "I'm tired of fighting this Sara," he whispered as he tried to keep the tremble from his voice. "Please tell me I'm not too late?"
tbc