Lee thought he saw someone just beyond the greenhouse as the darkness gave way to a bright blur. He thought he heard Cameron say something about Danielle, too, but didn't dare to hope or focus on that just yet. He thought he was losing his mind.
He mouthed two names over and over – Don and Anna, as he fidgeted with the band on his left wrist. No voice escaped him as he made his way back towards the house so unfamiliar to him now, eyes not seeing the hazards moved out of his way by Cameron's care.
Lee stopped, stepping back against the glass door when Nina embraced him, Cameron's hand on his arm, steering him away from other dangers. Rachel rounded the corner; her soft hands brushing against his cheeks as Bill clasp a hand on his shoulder, relinquishing the caretaking responsibilities from Cameron.
Gary stood on the other side of the living room, a beacon of light for Lee. When he reached the young man, who immediately tapped his shirt pocket, he asked, "Dr. Rosen, how are you feeling?"
Lee sighed. A question he had asked several times over many years in different situations to different patients and here he was at a loss for words. The only thing he could do was give a very tired smile; doing everything he could not to break down at what could still be a hallucination.
Vanessa Calder approached him, gently pulling him away from the group, but not too far, and sat him down on the couch. He remained motionless as she checked his vitals, curious about the young man watching him and the others.
"Lee, can you hear me," she asked. He gave a slight nod.
"You're here; you're safe," he said, the tone a mixture of question and statement.
Tears of frustration, outrage, realization, confusion and elation broke free as a cacophony of familiar voices washed over him all at once. Through blurry vision, he watched as the young man continued to watch those hovering now.
Vanessa's stern, authoritative voice broke through, silencing the onslaught of remarks. "Lee-."
"I'm fine," he whispered. Too many things swarmed at once, the names of the fallen, the two closest to him foremost in his mind. "How long," he asked, afraid to add more specifics to the question.
Vanessa kept Dr. Vivien's stethoscope pressed against Lee's chest until the racing heartbeat slowed. "Since we found you? Two days," she said glancing at her watch. "Make that three."
"Three days," Lee repeated. "Three days." He noticed the brightness of the house, the emptiness of the garden room, the echoing of sounds. The warmth of those around him grounded him best. "Three days," he said again before rising carefully to his feet. The feel of carpet beneath bare feet still seemed like a marvel to him, a small treasure to tuck away for future enjoyment and reflection. "I should go clean up," he said softly, not making eye contact with those around him, save for Vanessa Calder.
Vanessa felt the change of temperament immediately, a storm of anxiety, relief, anger, reserve and… Gary Bell was the only one who kept a slight distance away, eyes watchful as he fidgeted with the wristband he wore. Looking back at Lee, Vanessa saw him mimicking the young man without looking at him. It could be a good thing, she thought, maybe that one thread to pull Lee back to solid ground.
She followed him back to his room upstairs, gently reminding him that she would not be far, should he need anything. The bathroom door closed between them, she began to make the bed, aware of the lively discussions below, confident that Steve Jinks could help maintain order somehow.
Helping herself to one of the books on the nightstand, Vanessa noted how long the silence lasted on the other door – too long since the shower had ended. Time enough for her to make the bed, put away the clothes and reassure herself that nothing more could or would disturb him.
She knocked on the door softly and asked, "Lee, are you all right?" When he didn't answer, she prepared for the worst.
Lee stared long and hard at the reflection, seeing a beard and mustache months old, covering the sunken cheeks yet highlighting the dark circles under his eyes. He ran a hand over the soft salt-pepper hair and recalled the lively conversation that he, Nina, Gary and Rachel had about the extra facial hair.
"I don't like it," Gary said. "You can't see everything when part of the face is covered up. It isn't fair."
"Gary, you hardily look people in the eye as it is," Nina said. "Besides, you don't mind how long or short-."
"That's different. It doesn't cover the face. My uncle has a beard and my mom hates it. She says it makes him look shady. I think it makes him look old. Dr. Rosen, your beard makes you look old."
"Gary, I am old," he said plainly. "My hair is gray and-."
"Yeah, but you can be old without being old. I don't like the beard and neither does Rachel."
"Hey," the young woman said.
Lee bit back a smile. "Is that true, Rachel?"
She blushed. "I've just never really liked beards, but that's because the men in my family don't have them either and I've yet to see one that actually does anything to improve a man's appearance. The problem with beards is when things get caught in the hairs and there's that smell to deal with and the altered texture and…I'm being silly."
"You're being honest," Gary corrected. "So, Dr. Rosen, that's two votes for you to lose the beard."
"Nina, what do you think?" Lee only asked to be fair, if not slightly curious as to how far this 'boycott of the beard' went.
The svelte woman shrugged. "I like it. It adds a bit of dignity to your appearance."
"A bit of dignity," he repeated, uncertain if that was a good thing considering the 'before and after' effect or what. "All right. I appreciate your concerns and comments…" He changed the topic to something less personal.
Lee ran a hand over his smooth face just as Vanessa opened the door. "Well, you remind me of a dashing J. Robert Oppenheimer," she said, the smile widening.
He gave a half-smile in return. "I don't think I'm as large as him in terms of impact – recent congressional confessions notwithstanding."
"When he was working on the bomb, his anxiety led to an extremely light weight of only 115 pounds," she said. "You tie him in that regard."
"I guess two out of three isn't bad," he joked weakly as he put his spare glasses back on. Stepping out into the bedroom, the door still open, Lee could hear a discussion border on an argument. "I've failed them."
"No, they're holding together pretty well, from what I've seen so far," Vanessa told him. "The disagreement, for the most part, is my fault. Steve and I brought some instruments with us that the others are…uncertain about."
"Instruments that leave quite a mark or…" Lee searched her eyes then gave a wry smile. "Okay, just the glaring silence of government work."
"Something you seem to be familiar with," she said, returning the last of their initial exchange in Fenton. "No, we've tried explaining some of the items we've brought; items we've brought to help the others learn what happened when…" She went on to explain the artifacts and what had been gained by them so far.
Lee scoffed. "I can't even remember these last few days let alone any of… I don't know if I want to." He sighed. "Yet I suppose I'd need to, uncover the memories, I mean."
Before Lee could step out into the hall, Gary Bell stepped in. "Dr. Rosen, you shaved your beard. You look better. The others, they're fighting. Steve Jinks – he's like one of us – he said he has something that would help. But Cameron and Rachel don't want you to do it. Bill and Nina kinda do. I don't." He looked Lee in the eye for only a moment. "But I want you to do what you need to do. What you need, not me or the others because you're important."
Lee felt his throat tighten. "Thank you, Gary. I'm afraid to do this, but I need to; I have to."
Gary shook his head, eyes focused on the matching wristband Lee wore. "I knew you'd say that. Well, I'll be right with you this time. You won't be alone."
Lee said softly, "Thank you, Gary."
With his young patient at his side and visiting caretaker taking the lead, Lee was painfully aware of the reversal of roles. As he entered the office, the discussion ended abruptly.
"Ah, Mr. Jinks," Lee began as he sat down behind his desk, "I understand you have a way to help me reclaim what I have lost?"
The young man nodded as he removed a small jewelry box from his pocket, opening it to show two rings. "With your permission, I'd like to take that 'walk' with you down memory lane." Before Lee could ask, Steve continued. "I'm not as close to this situation as the others are, hence my asking you permission. Also, I'm familiar with how this artifact works, what to expect."
Lee cocked an eyebrow. "How much is at risk here?" Vanessa placed a hand on his shoulder as Gary stepped just behind the chair. "If you're going to be in danger-."
"Oh, no, nothing that serious, sir-."
"Call me Lee, please," he corrected, seeing anger, anxiety, anticipation and annoyance on the others' faces. "I- I n-. I want to figure this out, make sense of it, if possible. Thank you, for offering a means to do that."
Steve nodded in return. "It might be best if you have a bit of tea first, to relax, I mean."
Lee agreed, telling Nina where to find a particular tin tucked away in the corner of the top shelf of the china cabinet. As Vanessa stayed to explain the artifact's technique, Gary saw to it that everyone else left the room, worried that Steve followed him, too.
The office door ajar, Lee could hear the discussion resume, once more bordering on something more. Vanessa's soothing tone and reassuring explanation helped him prepare for what he was about to do.