Chapter 10 Pray
Two weeks later I had one of the most terrifying experiences of my life. To think it all started as a normal day on Voyager, well there's never a normal day on Voyager is there?
…
"Please remain still so I can treat your injures" Seven was in the Doctors office reading from a PADD the Doctor sitting in his chair behind the desk watching her "Thank you. I'm sorry. Did that hurt? I'll try to be more careful. Thanks for being a patient patient. Have a pleasant afternoon. This is absurd" Seven turned to the Doctor
"Not at all keep going, your doing fine"
"This vernacular is not applicable to my duties on Voyager"
"We can tailor the vocabulary to your specific situations a little later; right now it's the sentiment that counts"
"I don't see the relevance" the Doctor stood up walking around the desk to stand by Seven
"I created these exercises three years ago to familiarise myself with the social graces" the Doctor stood next to Seven 'Why do I feel this way when he comes close to me? I feel calm, I want to smile. No I must concentrate what is he saying' "I found if I repeated them several times each day the words became almost second nature, Lets continue. Exercise two" He quickly looked at his PADD and Seven looked at hers "The workplace encounter, Kes use to help me with this one. I'll be the nurse, you be the Doctor" the Doctor quickly swapped places with Seven. She put her hand on the tummy "Are you ok Seven?" Seven realise she must have looked in pain
"I am fine it was just a big kick"
"Sorry I should have been more careful, do you want to sit down and stop for a wile?"
"No I will be fine for the rest of this exercise" Seven looked down at the PADD reading the script in front of her
"Please hand me the hypo spray"
"Of course, Doctor"
"Thank you. Looks at instrument"
"No no don't read that part only the dialogue"
"Excuse me nurse this is the wrong hypo spray. Would you mind finding the correct one?"
"Not at all"
"Thank you, did I mention you look lovely today?"
"Oh Doctor your so charming"
"This lesson is terminated" Seven handed her PADD to the Doctor and began to walk out. The Doctor followed her stopping at the door to his office
"I know it's awkward, for me it was even painful" Seven stopped the door opened out she looked out in to the empty corridor Seven turned to face the Doctor
"But the rewards are well worth the effort
"Rewards?" Seven stepped away from the door
"The ability to put people at ease" the Doctor walked over to her "Make them feel more comfortable around you. You're a lot like me when I was first activated. If I'd had a mentor things would have gone a lot more smoothly. I'm willing to share my wisdom but if your not interested" the Doctor walked around Seven "Fine I'll just stick to your physiological maintenance" 'Oh I've upset him … Now I feel bad' Seven turned and held out her hand for the PADD
"I will examine your data"
"Oh good, pay special attention to exercise Seventeen Bridge banter for beginners"
"I shall"
"Are you alright Seven? You seem a little distracted today"
"I am fine" She was looking at the floor but the Doctor had seen her expression change at his question and knew there was something wrong
"Seven" she looked up at him "What is it?" Seven hesitated she wasn't sure what was wrong
"Well I am unsure of what it is but I believe it is an emotion that I have been experiencing when I…"
"Janeway to Seven of nine"
"Go ahead Captain"
"Report to the bridge"
"On my way Captain, Seven out" Seven walked towards the door and paused looking back to the Doctor
"Have a pleasant day"
…
"Harry run a long-range scan, are there any other Hirogen ships out there?"
"None"
"Take us within transporter range" Seven felt apprehensive, she walked down to Janeways side
"You intend to board their ship?"
"Yes"
"The Hirogen vessel is a potential threat, we should destroy it"
"Seven what you call a threat I call an opportunity to gain knowledge about this species and in this case maybe even show some compassion" 'How can she think this way when me and Tuvok could have been killed by them' "there seems to be a wounded pilot over there"
"Our experience with the Hirogen indicates that compassion would not be reciprocated"
"And all of my experience says we've got to take that chance anyway" Kathryn turned to walk back to her seat "Commander"
"You promised" Seven raised her voice but it sounded almost as if she were about to cry Kathryn turned to her
"Seven my ready room" Seven took a deep breath before following the Captain as soon as the doors were closed Seven screamed
"HOW CAN YOU SEND THEM THERE WHEN TUVOK, ME AND MY CHILD COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED BY THEM, THEY SHOWED US NO COMPASSION WHY SHOULD WE SHOW THEM ANY" Tears were rolling down her cheeks
"Oh Seven" Kathryn held her arms out and Seven stepped in to them crying on to her shoulder "Shhh now shhh Its ok" Seven quickly stepped back out of Kathryn's hug wiping the tears away
"NO ITS NOT"
"I understand how you're feeling Seven"
"NO YOU DON'T"
"Yes I do" Janeway walked over to the replicatior "Coffee, Black come and sit down Seven" Kathryn was shocked when Seven sat down next to her "I know that you are scared because of our last encounter with the Hirogen, I know your angry because I have sent an away team to the ship and you think they may have the same experience you had last time and your thinking that it may be a trap and that we could all be killed" Seven looked at her in amazement
"How did you know?"
"Because part of it is how I'm feeling and the other part is how I would feel if I were you"
"If you understand then why send them"
"Because as I said it's an opportunity to gain knowledge and show compassion"
"But what if it is a trap?"
"Then we will do what we always do, escape"
"You have broken your promise Captain"
"No I haven't, after we talked and I made that promise I told Chakotay and that's why I sent him because he has agreed to help me keep the crew safe" Seven looked in to Kathryn's eyes and knew she was telling the truth and she felt safe again the tears came back
"Thank you Captain"
"You are very welcome Seven" Kathryn looked back at Seven seeing the tears made her want to cry to "Come here" Kathryn held her arms out again for Seven and she quickly fell in to them crying for what seemed like forever, Seven was surprised at the Captains behaviour she had never really seen Janeway as the type that would let her crew members cry in to her shoulder. When Seven had stopped crying she sat back up and wiped her eyes
"I must return to my post"
"Go on then" Seven stood to leave but fell back on the sofa
"Seven" Kathryn went to grab a tricorder
"I am alright Captain I … I just lost my footing"
"Are you ok" Kathryn put the tricorder down
"I am fine Captain" Seven go up again
"Have a pleasant day Captain" Kathryn smiled 'She really is learning'
…
"I've erected a level 10 force field around engineering"
"Good, set up secondary force fields around every hatch, Jefferies tube and conduit leading in to this room" Seven walked to the nearest console and began setting up force fields she could feel a strange sensation it was unlike anything she had ever experienced but she was nervous, it was like a pain but it wasn't she didn't know how to describe it. It was then she noticed that B'elanna had stopped talking as he turned to see what was wrong she heard a cry, a cry she knew well one of species 8472 she looked at it and froze flash backs of a bio ship filled her mind her and eight of nine in tubes with liquid of some kind and pain so much pain then the flash back was gone she looked around to see B'elanna and another three crew members on the floor
"Seven lower the force field, the Captains on her way" Seven walked back to her console lowering the force field quickly then almost ran to B'elanna slowly kneeling down and feeling her pulse. Janeway walked in
"Report"
"Four crew members are wounded, two seriously" Kathryn helped Seven up
"Get them to sickbay"
"Species 8472 accessed engineering through the antimatter injector port" Seven wasn't even sure how she knew this 'I must have seen and taken it all in even though I was having a flash back, I will have to ask the Doctor about that'
"Our phaser fire was insufficient" Seven was walking over to an open Jefferies tube hatch "It attacked us, then escaped through Jefferies tube 17-alpha" Kathryn hit her Com-badge quickly
"Janeway to Tuvok"
"Tuvok here"
"The intruder just left engineering seal off the area"
"Understood"
"Secure the warp core" Seven fell against a console
"Seven?" Kathryn helped her up "Lose you're footing again?"
"My child is trying to beat me up, It was a hard kick Captain it was unexpected that's all I'm fine now" Seven lied
"Well come on then"
…
"Chakotay to Tuvok We're ready to go"
"As are we"
"Proceed to deck eleven, keep your Com-links open"
"Understood, activate the nanoprobe charges" Seven quickly did
"Level five should be sufficient to stun the creature"
Tuvok and Seven began to walk to deck eleven. Seven was uneasy her thoughts were erratic no matter how hard she tried she couldn't calm herself. Tuvok turned his light to look down a corridor he saw nothing and continued but as Seven passed the corridor she was almost certain that there was something there, She shot in to the darkness of the corridor Tuvok turned to the sound of the shot and came back to Sevens side as he shined his light around they could see a PADD floating in mid air
"You missed" Tuvok continued to walk on Seven followed
"Since species 8472 invaded the ship you've become increasingly agitated"
"They were the only species to offer true resistance to the Borg they destroyed millions of drones, hundreds of worlds and they used me for there research and tests I have reason to be agitated"
"That is true but with those tests gave you something that you find most precious to you"
"Explain"
"Your child, without species 8472 you would never have been pregnant and the collective would never have left you here, you would never have been free without them"
"I never thought of it that way" Seven was now unsure of how she felt the anger and fear were almost gone now replaced by confusion. Chakotay's voice interrupted her thoughts
"Chakotay to Tuvok"
"Tuvok here"
"We've cornered the intruder in section 59"
"On our way" they walked in silence until they heard shooting
"the Hirogen"
"I believe you are correct" as they came up to section 59 Tuvok raised his rifle and shoot at the Hirogen then walking over and checking Tom and Chakotay, Seven stood there watching the creature watching it just confused her even more
…
"Captain just before we cornered it species 8472 accessed deflector control from this panel"
"I've analysed the transmission protocols, it was attempting to open a singularity in to its realm but it failed"
"It was trying to get home"
"That's what it looks like" Seven watched the Captain walk away
"Lieutenant, do you think I owe my freedom to species 8472?"
"Seven?"
"Commander Tuvok pointed out to me that without species 8472 I would never have been pregnant and the Borg would never have left me here on Voyager, Do you believe I owe my freedom to them"
"Kinda"
"Kinda? Explain"
"Well I'm guessing they never meant to get you pregnant and they never knew that the Borg would leave you here so you don't owe them completely they set it in motion but the Borg did the rest"
"Thank you Lieutenant please excuse me" Seven walked away thinking about what had just been said. Tom was right but so was Tuvok, the more Seven tried to make sense of it the more confused she became
"Seven" the voice snapped Seven out of her thoughts
"Yes Captain"
"Where are you going?"
"I wanted to look at the creature"
"Look at it?"
"Yes Captain it would be the first time I have really looked at one out of the collective"
"Well once you're done here report to my ready room"
"Yes Captain" she watched Kathryn as she walked away she turned and almost bumped in to a crew member
"Sorry"
"It's alright are you ok?"
"Fine I just wasn't looking where I was going sorry"
"Ahh Seven just the person I wanted to see" the Doctor called over to her
"What is it you wanted Doctor?"
"Well I wanted to ask you about species 8472 did the Borg ever get scans of it"
"No they encountered the same problems the crew are having"
"Oh"
"Why did you want to know?"
"they may have contained medical data"
"I doubt it any data the Borg had on species 8472 was tactical"
"Oh well" He looked at it "Poor thing"
"How is it a poor thing, It killed many Borg drones and could even be the one that ran tests on me"
"It was defending its self the way I see the war between species 8472 and the Borg is like children in a playground fight"
"I don't understand"
"the Borg collective is the bully and species 8472 is the new kid the bully picks on the new kid but the new kid fights back and is a lot stronger than the bully realised soon the bully is asking for help in stopping the new kid but the new kid thinks everyone in the playground is like that so declares a fight on everyone"
"I never saw it that way" Seven took one last look at it, It looked so weak and helpless Seven almost felt sorry for it 'How can I hate it, feel sorry for it and owe my life to it all at the same time it makes no sense, I have to get away from here' Seven walked as fast as she could to the nearest turbo lift
"Bridge" Seven was organising her thoughts in to reasons against it and reasons for it 'I should help it because I kinda owe my freedom to it and my child, I should feel sorry for it because it has been perused by the Hirogen and is almost dead because of them but then I could have been killed by species 8472 on many occasions' a flash back stopped her thoughts she was in the tube of liquid it felt like she was drowning in it she tried to move but she was paralysed her eyes opened and stung she saw three of them and another tube of liquid with eight of nine in then there was pain more pain than she had ever experienced
then it was gone she was back in the turbo lift
"Computer halt lift" Seven lent against the wall breathing deeply a single tear fell from her eye she placed her hands on the tummy and thought of her baby names and what it would look like, she was soon calm again
"Computer resume lift"
When the doors opened on to the bridge Seven stepped out and walked down to the Captains ready room
"You wish to see me Captain?"
"I've made a decision about species 8472, I'm going to return it to fluidic space in order to do that I need you to open up a quantum singularity"
"I don't believe that is a prudent course of action"
"I realise it may be difficult for you to help save this creature's life but part of becoming human is learning to have compassion for those who are suffering, even when there your bitter enemies"
"Why?" Kathryn stood up walking around her desk
"I remember when I was a lieutenant. It was during a Cardassian border conflict my away team was cut off while we were defending a Federation outpost; we'd been exchanging phaser fire with a group of Cardassians for about three days. A stalemate. One night during a break in the fighting we could hear this low moaning sound coming from somewhere in the brush, we knew that none of our people were out there so it had to be a wounded Cardassian. You have to understand we'd been killing each other for weeks on this planet it was brutal, but our commanding officer decided that we couldn't just sit there and listen to that poor man suffer so he order me and an ensign to crawl out there and bring that Cardassian back to our camp. I thought he was crazy, he was risking out life's for someone who would have shot us without hesitation but we did it and the Cardassian lived. Three days later we secured the outpost, It was a major victory we were all decorated by Starfleet Command, but in retrospect the thing I'm most proud of was the night we saved that man's life"
"Explain" Kathryn walked over to stand in front of Seven and looked up at her
"A single act of compassion can put you in touch with your own humanity"
"You are trying to justify you present decision"
"No I'm trying to help you see this as an opportunity to grow, I know you don't wanna do it Seven but I'm telling you as your Captain and as your friend you won't regret it"
"No your decision is tactically unsound, we will be surrounded by Hirogen ships in approximately two hours if we do not surrender the creature they will destroy us. A lesson in compassion will do me little good if I am dead"
"It is wrong to sacrifice another being to save our own lives"
"I have observed that you have been willing to sacrifice your own life to save the lives of your crew" Janeway walked away in frustration
"Yes but that's different, that was my choice this creature does not have a choice"
"It invaded our ship put our lives at risk to save its own in my view it had already forfeited its freedom"
"I'm giving you an order, report to deflector control and begin working on creating a singularity" 'How can she ask me to save its life when it not only puts the lives of the crew at risk as well as her own, mine and my child'
"I will not comply" Seven was scared not only of species 8472 and the Hirogen but also of what Janeway would think she had come to respect the Captain even thought she didn't agree with her most of the time she was a very kind and caring person Seven could hardly believe that this woman ordering her to sacrifice hers and her child's life was the same woman that let her cry on her shoulder only hours before "I have agreed to remain on Voyager I have agreed to function as a member of your crew, but I will not be a willing participant in mine and my child's destruction or the destruction of this ship"
"Objection noted, We'll do this without you" Anger rose in Seven at first she had been afraid of how Janeway would react now she was mad that she was putting this crews life at risk for a creature that caused so much pain in her life
"You will fail"
"And you have just crossed the line end of debate, report to your quarters and stay there till this is over is that understood?" Seven Just turned and walked out knowing if she didn't leave she would say or do something she would regret
Back in her quarters Seven was still angry
"One glass of water" she walked over to get it 'I need to calm down its not good for the baby what normally calms me down … A walk on the beach on the holodeck oh no cant do that Janeways left me stuck in here … the baby's room' Seven walked in to the baby's room and looked around she had now put shelves up on the walls and added some toys there was a flotter doll donated by Naomi Wildman and around the top of the wall there was a border with drawings of all the senior crew members the drawings were also by Naomi Seven sat in the rocking chair in the corner and put her hands on her tummy then rocked herself to sleep
…
Seven awoke when the ship shook
"What was that?"
the ship shook again almost pushing Seven out of her chair, when the ship was still again Seven stood up making her way to the living room and looked out of the window to see four Hirogen ships she swallowed remembering her time on one of those ships
"Bridge to Seven of nine"
"Yes"
"Report to deck 11 immediately with a supply of nanoprobes"
"Understood"
…
Seven walked past the two security guards and over to the Doctor
"The nanoprobes?"
"Armed and ready"
"Not a moment to soon" Seven looked the creature in the eye she saw so much pain there and almost a wish to die, she knew how that felt 'I cant let it die, it wants to go home, just like we do' Seven turned to the sound of phaser fire both security guards were unconscious and the Hirogen has a phaser rifle pointed at her Seven raised her own quickly
"Give my the prey"
"Lower your weapon or I will destroy you" the ship shook and Species 8472 cried out
"I don't think you will, you want me to destroy this creature I saw it on your face earlier in the medical bay it's a look I've seen a thousand times. Stand aside"
the ship shook, Seven and the Doctor fell against the wall. They turned to see the force field was down and species 8472 was charging towards the Hirogen. Seven bent down and took off a panel on the wall
'If I can lock on the Hirogen and beam him back to the attacking ships that my distract them for a few minuets' Seven was typing in commands when she felt pain 'that was no kick' Seven bit her lip and continued unknown to her that she had hit a few buttons while attempting to steady her self during the pain
"What are you doing?" the Doctor asked her concern in his voice But she didn't have time to answer she was overriding Bridge commands, there was a beeping sound 'No no no no no that's not what I asked you to do, I said just the Hirogen' she looked to her side to see both the Hirogen and species 8472 transport she stood slowly realising what she had just done
…
Seven was regenerating in the cargo bay trying to forget the terrible accident she had caused. the Captain came in and shut off the regenerating sequence
"Captain"
"Step down, please" Seven stepped down from her alcove but she was still taller than Janeway
"Seven you disobeyed my direct orders, and as a result you condemned a sentient being to its death"
"I also diverted the Hirogen attack, an attack which would have destroyed us"
"Maybe not, in any case the decision wasn't yours to make"
"The creature broke through the force field I had no choice but to try to transport…" Seven was cut off
"I didn't come here to debate your decision; I came here to inform you of the consequences"
"But Captain…"I
"When you first came to Voyager I decided to grant you the same liberties and freedoms of any crew member because I wanted you to be a part of this family, And I've been willing to accommodate for your" She paused searching for the right word "unique way of doing things even when you rubbed somebody the wrong way or violated protocol, But this time I cant accommodate you, From this point forward you will no longer have access to any primary systems on this ship not without my direct authorisation"
'She won't even let me explain it was an accident'
"If you attempt to circumvent me I'll throw you in the brig, I still need your expertise in the astrometrics lab if you're willing if not you can spend your time in here and in your quarters, is that understood?"
"Yes" Kathryn turned and started walking towards the door 'It's not fair just because of an accident and even if I did do it deliberately I shouldn't be punished for not thinking the way she does'
"It is puzzling" Janeway stopped
"What's that?"
"You made me into an individual, you encouraged me to stop thinking like a member of the collective, to cultivate my independence and my humanity" Janeway turned to face her "But when I assert that independence I am punished"
"Individuality has its limits, especially on a star ship where there's a command structure" Seven slowly walked over to the Captain
"I believe that you are punishing me because I do not think the that way you do, Because I am not becoming more like you" Seven paused for a second "You claim to respect my individuality, but in fact you are frightened by it"
"As you were" Janeway turned again to leave when she heard a cry of pain from behind her she turned to see Seven leaning on the edge on an alcove bent over in pain
"Seven?"
"Captain" she looked up "I believe I am in labour"
Well so much for me getting it online quickly, sorry just had so much going on then there was Christmas and new year and college, really sorry but I hope you like this chapter please review it helps me to know what you all think of it
~Phoebe-Janeway~