DISCLAIMER: I have discovered a song that is perfect for Tokaki. I have also discovered Fushigi Yugi. No, that does not mean I found it buried in a chest deep in the sand on a desert island (although that would be COOL), but I have discovered it. Note that I do not say I OWN it. Because I don't!

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Yeeeeeaaaahhhhhhhh... Sorry this took so long. ~grins sheepishly~ I kinda didn't have a choice... the writer's block's been beating me over the head and slowing down my work rate. Add into that projects, assigned readings, and calculus tests (not to mention nearly running out of gas more than once because I kept forgetting to get gas money -.-;), and you have one crazy schedule. I finally found inspiration again on Wednesday and finished R&R 18, which has been bugging me for a few weeks, and Market 11 is coming along now.

So... what does that all mean? That updates on most of my things (including R&R, which I only have to proofread) will probably be sproadic - one new thing every week or so, possibly less. I'll try, I really will try to get 'em out quickly, but please don't be angry if I can't.

In a slightly less depressing train of thought, lemme just say that Into the Woods is one GREAT musical. I finally got to see the entire thing because I borrowed-slash-stole the DVD from my Drama teacher on Friday (I have to give it back though ;_;) and watched it with Gen-chan. She found it amusing as well ~_~ Why don't you check it out? It's really fun!

Oh yeah, the rating HAS gone up, just to be safe. Please take note.

Hope you like this chapter! Happy reading!

~clunks herself over the head to remind her to STOP USING CLICHÉ PHRASES!~



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Three days later, we rode into a small town, dripping wet from a sudden shower and feeling slightly ticked off. There'd been no sign of the enemy since the fight where I was wounded, and we were all a bit confused by that, all of us trying to figure it out. It would make sense to send another party after us immediately, while we were tired and might let our guards down, but no one had come. Perhaps it had been a scouting party. Perhaps rebels. But no, that one who'd attacked me said that if even one of us was dead… Maybe they'd been trying to stir up trouble. Well, that was certainly accomplished.

"Subaru!" Tatara came running out of an inn we'd found, breaking my reverie, and headed to where I leaned against a wall under an overhanging roof, managing to keep mostly dry. Poor Tatara, as well as everybody else, was soaked to the bone and shivering with the chilly water, but he'd somehow managed to secure an old blanket to hold over himself during his dash to where I'd been left with the horses. "We've got rooms! This way!" He held a portion of the blanket over my head and took a bundle of reins from my slippery grasp, and we jogged to the inn. A couple of scrawny-looking boys met us outside the building, soaked as well but not seeming to care, and took the horses from us and around to the stables in back. For our part, Tatara and I sprinted through the door as fast as we could.

A warm fire was blazing in the large fireplace and I quickly headed over to it and held out my hands, willing the feeling to come back into them. Tatara went to the bar to talk to the man behind it, folding up the blanket as he went. The fire was nice and hot. I could feel the shivering subsiding.

There was a pop of air beside me and I glanced over to see Tokaki next to me. I wasn't quite sure what to make of him now; since I'd gotten hurt he'd returned to his normal personality, happily teasing and egging me on, with no hint of awkward feelings on his part. It was more than a little confusing, but I wasn't arguing.

"That looks like what I want to do right now," he commented, nodding at my hands. I could feel my fingers again, thank Byakko.

"So do it," I replied promptly. He grinned lopsidedly and crouched by the fire, holding his hands out as I was. He was a bit dryer than the rest of us, as he had the luxury of simply going between buildings while we four searched for a place we could all get rooms, but he'd been in the rain like the everyone else.

After a few minutes he stood again, stretching and yawning. "Any news? If you're in here, I take it we've found a place."

I nodded. "Better tell Toroki and Kokie that, before we end up paying twice as much as we need to."

"Hai, captain!" He disappeared.

I groaned and rolled my eyes at his weird sense of humor. A hand touched my shoulder and I turned around, looking for whoever wanted my attention. Behind me was a girl about Kokie's or Inoue's age, perhaps a bit younger. She was overweight, but she had a pleasant air about her that gave her a friendly look. "Doulin-san?"

I blinked at being once again called by my real name, then realized that Tatara must have tried to hide our identities. I prayed that Tokaki wouldn't pop in suddenly and wreck his work. "Hai, that's me."

"I'm to show you to your room, follow me please." She turned and began crossing the not-very-crowded main room, heading for the stairs at the back. I followed easily, glancing back once or twice to look for the guys, but didn't see them. Tatara wasn't at the bar anymore, and the other three had yet to appear through the doorway.

I counted ten doors along the hallway and whistled softly; it was a prosperous inn for this far north. No wonder we'd been able to get rooms easily.

The girl stopped before the third door on the left and pushed it open, gesturing inside. "This is your room. Lanva-san and Kasaru-san will be next door, and Joji-san and Seiki-san across the hall." Huh? Who were Kasaru and Seiki? "You'll find towels on the bed." She bowed politely and went back down the hall, leaving me to sketch a vague bow in her direction and puzzle over the names.

The room was warm, thankfully, and just as she had said, there were two large towels on one bed. I pulled one around my shoulders immediately, and wrapped the other around my hair, squeezing it to get out as much water as possible. My body performed these tasks automatically though, for my mind was arguing with itself about the names.

Do I know those people?

Probably, otherwise she wouldn't think you had anything to do with them.

Then who are they?

OK, go over the facts.

What facts?

You know two of the names already.

Yeah…Lanva and Joji.

Tokaki and Kokie.

So are the other two Tatara and Toroki?

You're talking to yourself, you realize that?

I hurriedly ceased the conversation, knowing I didn't want to be driven crazy, much less by myself, and folded the towels again. My bag had been brought up and placed on the small table that was pushed in the corner, and I quickly pulled a spare set of clothing out and started to change. The clothes Tomomi had given me had been invaluable.

I took a closer look at the room once I was finished. There were two windows, screened over, and candle holders in the walls. The little table had a chair to accompany it, and a second chair was in a separate corner. There were two beds, both pushed against walls. I trailed my fingers over the bedcovers and smiled; they seemed thick and warm, which was all I wanted.

My spirits dropped a little and the smile disappeared as I glanced at the second bed. Suzuno… if she were with us, like she should have been, she would be sharing the room with me, sleeping in that bed. But if she were with us we probably wouldn't be in this town, having to use these rooms. We had to find her, the sooner, the better.

A polite knock sounded on my door and Tatara stepped in, smiling a bit tiredly and closing the door behind him. "Feeling better now?"

"I'm dry, I'm warm, and I can feel all my limbs."

"I'll take that as a yes then. Toroki and everyone should be here in a minute." He seated himself in the chair next to the table, picking up one of the wet towels and squeezing out his hair as I had.

I watched him, head titled slightly, brow cocked a bit. "You probably have towels in your room for that, you know."

"Yes, but it's a bit cold in there."

"I see. Oh!" I snapped my fingers as I remembered. "I wanted to ask you something. Who are Kasaru and Seiki?"

He looked at me with an inquiring expression. "How'd you hear those names?"

"I asked first."

"So you did." His mouth twisted in a wry smile and he blinked at the floor. "I'm Kasaru, and Toroki is Seiki."

"How did you know everyone's name?"

He grinned, a bit smugly. "I asked."

"Oh, you." I threw a pillow at him, which he easily blocked. "And to answer your question, that girl used them. Trying to keep our profile low?"

He nodded. "Hai. It seemed smart to me."

"It probably was. Care to go downstairs and wait for the others?"

"Why not?"



~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~




Tokaki, Toroki, and Kokie tumbled in (nearly literally) a few minutes after Tatara and I had claimed a table in the main room, soaked and shivering as I had been earlier. The same girl appeared, talked briefly to them while the same two small boys raced upstairs with the bags, dripping water trails on the floor. When they'd raced downstairs and outside again the girl led the other three upstairs. I looked at Tatara and we grinned; the other three were a bit blown over by the whirlwind service and their faces plainly showed it.

But they were soon back, dry and changed and in a better mood, and we obeyed our stomachs' orders and asked for dinner. Somehow I'd ended up sitting next to Tokaki - again - but I decided not to make a big deal out of it.

Tokaki pulled out Ebizo's map, which fortunately hadn't been damaged by the rain, and unrolled it in the center of the table. Tatara peered at the line we'd sketched in to show our progress, which hadn't really been all that considerable. "We've gotten into the low hills at last. Heika-sama's scouts have reported a concentration of soldiers just to the north of the central mountains between the borders. That's where they think Taheiji's main camp is. We should probably head east next."

"A bit north of east should be good," Toroki spoke up. For understandable reasons, he was the only one not looking at the map. "We've been going north for awhile, but not quite long enough. We can avoid the desert now, though, so we should start east as well as north."

"And just how do you know this?" Tokaki inquired.

"I'm blind, I'm not stupid."

"Oh hush you two. You're like little kids. Let's see…" I scanned the map quickly, then placed my finger on one of the dots. "We're here. The central mountains are… here." I pointed to a section just north of the tallest of the mountains, and estimated the distance between them. "It should take us another four days to get there."

"Five." We all looked in surprise at Kokie. Usually he was very quiet, reserving most of his talk for me or Toroki, who he seemed to get along with well. I didn't remember him speaking up in the full group before this. He turned a bit red as we all focused on him, but he kept going. "The terrain so far has been relatively smooth and straight. In the hills and mountains you often have to go out of your way to get to where you want. It's just the way it is."

I nodded. "Five, then. Possibly six, if we get hung up anywhere. Poor Suzuno…"

The conversation died for a minute as the girl brought our food to us and we dug in eagerly, the riding and the rain having increased our appetites to unheard of proportions.

Then I realized we had no drinks. I swallowed quickly and looked around for that girl, but she was nowhere to be seen. It seemed I would have to be a barmaid for one night. "All right, what would everyone like?"

"You."

I smacked him, hard. The others just laughed and told me what they wanted to drink, and I approached the bar.

We weren't the only ones there by a long shot, but neither was it crowded. Almost half of the tables were occupied, mostly by small groups or the occasional pair. There was an old man at one end of the bar, and a man who looked a bit older than Tatara about three-fourths of the way down the other way. I leaned against the bar about halfway between them, watching for someone to come out so I could place our order.

After a minute I became aware of a pair of eyes watching me. That creepy feeling was running up and down my spine, but it didn't seem threatening. Just… observing. I casually flicked my gaze to my right and left, searching for the watcher. The other seishi were happily arguing over their food at the table, gesturing at the map but remembering not to shout. One or two other people watched them amusedly, but most of the others were concentrating on their own things. The old man to my left was staring into his cup, but to my right I caught the young man looking back at his plate, raising his cup to his mouth.

Ah… so it was him.

Being warm, dry, and fed had put me in a better mood, and I slid onto a stool near him, ready to hear someone else's voice, someone that WASN'T a seishi. "Do you know how long the innkeeper will be?"

He spluttered and spit out his mouthful of liquid, coughing violently. I blinked in surprise as he hit himself on the chest, trying to clear his airway. "Are… Are you all right?" I watched him worriedly, trying to figure out what to do if he suddenly stopped breathing.

Fortunately he waved his hand at me and nodded, coughing again but not very violently. I kept my eye on him, ready to at least try something if he relapsed, but he sat up straighter on his stool and gave me a sheepish grin. "Daijobu… You surprised me."

"I'm sorry I made you choke." I gave him a tentative smile, trying to apologize, and his face brightened. "You don't happen to have the answer to my question though, do you?"

Now it was his turn to blink. "What…? Oh, no, I don't know. But… I've gotta say this, you look great."

Oh FREAKIN' no… Another Tokaki!

"I mean, it's been what, six years or so? You've grown up well."

Uhhhhh…… Help here, wake UP Subaru, what's he talking about?

He watched me as I tried to figure out just where he was coming up with these things, a grin slowly spreading over his face. "You don't remember me, do you?"

"I… I know you?" I replied rather stupidly, pointing at him (again rather stupidly). "Do I?"

Wonderful Subaru, you're just a river of creativity tonight.

I smacked the pesky inner voice into submission as he laughed. I was kinda miffed about him laughing, but it wasn't teasing, just the funny-type of laughing. "Yes, you do, but I guess you don't remember… My family moved away awhile ago, you weren't even a teenager yet, I think you'd barely gotten into double digits when we left… It's Gidayu."

Gidayu… Gidayu… I searched the cupboards of my mind for something associated with that name. It seemed to be familiar… AHH! THERE!

I pulled up a picture I'd had stored away for years, of a skinny, lanky, stick-thin boy about two or three years older than myself… One of Bokkai's friends. The boy was standing in Dou-san's import/export shop, looking around at the new things from Konan and Hokkan while Bokkai chattered excitedly away at him about how much they cost to buy and how much they were going to sell for… Dou-san's little apprentice all the time. His brown hair was messy and unkempt and his gray eyes were wide with awe. He had a small scar from one of the few times he and Bokkai fought, on his jawbone right next to his ear… I checked, and sure enough, that scar was there. Barely visible, but there.

"You've grown up too," I squeaked, just a bit overwhelmed at finding a long-lost acquaintance while on seishi business. He still didn't have much muscle on him, but his hair was neat and trimmed now, and his eyes seemed much more mature. I realized my initial impression, that he was older than Tatara, had been wrong; something had given him the look of aged maturity. Probably the work he'd gone into, Kaa-san had said if a person didn't like what he was doing for a living he'd age before his time.

Then I realized I'd sounded like a complete idiot.

"Yes, it's really been awhile. Why are you out here? You're not alone, are you?" He was immediately concerned, glancing around as if somehow he could pick out my companions by some invisible signal.

"No no, I'm not alone, my friends are over there." I turned to point at our table, then turned bright red and groaned as I saw Tokaki attempting to hit Toroki for something - I didn't want to know what - and repeatedly missing, Toroki taunting him on. "Oh Byakko…"

"They seem like a… lively group."

"Thank you for being tactful."

"It's the least I could do."

"I'll be right back." I slid off the stool and marched back to the others, glaring murder at them.

Only Toroki seemed to notice me coming, though. He turned and grinned cheerfully. "New boyfriend, Subaru?"

"I will not hesitate to smack you as well." And then, just to prove my point, I did.

"Itai!" He rubbed his ear and frowned. "What'd I do?"

I leaned over to whisper in his ear, not wanting others to eavesdrop. "First, don't call me that. No one here knows who we are, we don't want to attract unnecessary attention. Second, he's not my boyfriend, he's a friend of my brother's who moved away awhile ago and we just realized we knew each other. Third, stop embarrassing me!" I raised my voice on the last line so Tokaki could hear as well. "You're acting like toddlers, can we have one hour where you two don't try and annoy each other? For once?" I glared at them both. Kokie was watching gleefully and Tatara was trying to hide a smirk.

Then I noticed the pot of tea on the table, and five cups stacked next to it, and expanded my glare to fit all of them. The other two joined Toroki and Tokaki in shrinking. "When did that get there?"

No one answered.

"I'm going to find out one way or another, you might want to make it less painful for yourself…"

"I-It came right after you left, Subaru-san…" Kokie piped up hesitantly. "They wanted to see how long you'd stay up there…"

I glared at the three of them, mostly at Tokaki, who I knew was undoubtedly the largest cause behind this. Then I took a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, closing my eyes. Letting it out in a rush I sat down in my seat, determined to keep a leash on all of them. If they needed someone to be their mother, then so be it. I picked up my chopsticks again and resumed eating my dinner, which had cooled considerably. They watched me warily for a minute before slowly following my example. All of them had the decency to hang their heads in submission as they ate except Tokaki, who kept mildly smirking at me in the corner of my eye.



~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~




"So, what brings you this far from home? You all are still living in the same house, aren't you?"

I'd joined Gidayu at the bar again as fast as I could after I finished eating, ignoring the other seishi past glaring at them once again. I was sick and tired of their childish behavior. Yes, the day had been long, trying, and not at all pleasant, but that was NO EXCUSE to be so stupid in public.

I scrambled for a reply that would be at least semi-plausible. "We're, ahh… on our way to… visit a friend of ours!" I groaned inwardly. I was so bad at telling a convincing lie! "She's… up near the border, this was the quickest way to come."

That's right Subaru, Doulin, or whatever else you call yourself. Stick close to the facts. That way it'll be easier to keep a straight face.

Why was my inner voice being so vocal tonight?

Fortunately half of Gidayu's attention had been taken up in accepting a fresh pot of tea and two clean cups from the man who now stood behind the bar. "Arigato." He unstacked the cups and carefully poured the rich green tea into them, making miniature waterfalls in the air. Good, he'd been sufficiently distracted to not notice my little slip-ups. "A friend, eh? What's her name? I might know of her."

"You probably wouldn't, she's only been up there a little while… And she lives in a really small village, we're not even sure just where it is. Oh, thank you." I accepted the proffered cup and took a small sip, making a face at its bitterness. "What's in this?"

"Oh, this is a local blend. It takes a bit of getting used to, but it grows on you." I noticed he could swallow the stuff down without wincing at the taste, and decided he was probably right. The palace tea tasted differently than anything we'd drunk at home, it seemed each region even in one country had its own special recipe. I decided to go ahead and get used to it and took another sip. "If you all are going to the border or thereabouts, I'd be extremely careful." Gidayu's face, which before had been so mobile, now froze into a mask of solemnity. "We've heard of the Kutou soldiers massing at the border, and in the nights sometimes you think you hear the thundering of hooves over the grass… I don't know if you realize it or not, but right now we're about as close to the war zone as you can be and be safe. You're taking a terrible risk going into that area right now…"

"Well, we have to," I shot back defensively. "We screwed up and now we're going to go fix things." I scowled into the green liquid in my cup, then took a long drink to prevent myself from starting to yell at him. He meant well, after all. "Hey, this stuff isn't half bad…"

"No, not really."

"But isn't the war at a stand-still? Neither side has troops to throw at each other, so that makes it better to travel now. And I thought most of the confrontations were south of the desert." Where Bokkai died…

He sighed and shook his head. "Doulin-chan, you don't understand. There are all sorts of thieves and bandits running loose out there now. They were honest men, most of them with families, but this is the only way they can survive now. The war made them homeless, took almost everything they had. And then there are the scouts from either army. They're moving north. You could do it, yes, and people do do it, but it's not a risk I would run right now if I were you."

"Well, you're not," I replied with a huff, and immediately winced. I set my cup down on the scarred wooden bar and placed a hand on his forearm. "Gomen nasai… I didn't mean to be harsh… but we don't really have any other choice." We had to get back Suzuno, no matter what the cost.

He looked at me for a long moment, not calculating but not innocently either, almost judging me. The silence grew uncomfortable, and I cautiously sipped from my tea again. "Well…" I jumped a bit, making the tea slosh around and almost above the rim. "why are you going there?"

I sighed, putting my elbows on the bar and slumping forward until the cup touched my forehead. "It's a long… long story…"

"...I get it. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"Thank you. That makes it so much easier."

"Probably does. How much do you know of the war, Doulin-chan?"

Stay shut, mouth. You know too much for just a common girl.

He took my silence as a sign that I wasn't that well informed, which had been true, until I'd gotten to the palace. He started to speak and I was content to let him; he might know something more than Ebizo and heika-sama did, although I doubted it. But never turn down a lead. "Word's come up from the south that they're out of men. And the Kutou just seem to keep coming and coming… but this time they're coming up here, trying to enter above the mountain range, where its less sparsely populated… There is no army anymore. We'll be crushed if something doesn't happen, and quickly. Byakko, if ever we could use the miko and the seishi-"

I spluttered in complete surprise, spitting out the tea in my mouth. Did he know?! Did he have some clue?! Oh Byakko, how was I going to cover that?! All those nice cheerful thoughts were going through my head as I coughed uncontrollably, trying to breathe freely again, and make my eyes somewhat of a normal size. They were about as big as saucers at the moment. They squeezed shut as I felt water in the corner of my eyes, refusing to let myself cry. I hated when I started choking.

"Doulin-chan! Doulin-chan, are you all right?!" My mind finally registered Gidayu's voice and face, hovering anxiously over me. It was a twisted replay of the opening of our first conversation in six years.

I copied him and waved him away, regaining my breath through sheer will. "Hai, I'm fine… Just… Just realized something." Bing! Idea.

"Nani?" He didn't sit down right away, but he would in a minute…

"Well… there's something pretty important you should know…" Oh no, my voice was trying to waver again. Why did everything that happened in this one single day have to annoy me?! "Bokkai…"

"What about Bokkai?"

I took a deep breath and looked straight at him. "He's dead. In the south. In the war."

He sat.



~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~




After he recovered from the shock of hearing about his friend, and giving me the stereotypical condolences (although his were truly sincere), I forcefully turned the conversation into almost a gossip session about his old acquaintances from home. It's amazing how long six years of catch-up can last. Marriages, deaths, births, even updates on old feuds seem like they'd be easy to describe, but when as much time had passed as it had with him, it takes a while to get through everything.

Most of the other patrons had left as I relayed the news, the girl was wiping off the tables, and there were five mismatched teapots in front of us when I wrapped up. My vision seemed a bit blurred and I blinked my eyes, trying to clear them. Then I realized that my mind was also operating slower than usual, and I was determined to go to sleep as soon as Gidayu left. It had been a long day, after all. Yep, a long day… Just like it was a long story…

Long day… sleep…

What the heck…? Darkness? But it was light in the room…



Then there was something on my shoulder… felt kinda like a hand… yeah, that's what it was. It was surprisingly hard to talk, I couldn't seem to open my mouth all the way… "G'way, Tokaki…"

"Doulin-chan!" It was a male voice, but… I didn't think it was Tokaki… Tokaki didn't have that wide a range… whee, it went from low to high really quickly… up and down and up and down and up… "Doulin-chan! Wake up!" …and down and up and down… and up…

Wait… was that thunder? It sounded like it… But no, they were too close together… horses? But we were inside… were we? It felt really warm.

Then more horses, then another voice… a lotta cursing… hee hee, that had to be Tokaki, but his was doing the funny up and down thing also… It was actually kinda cute… and more cursing… "Doulin?! Doulin?! Shit, Doulin, what did you think you were doing?! How'd this happen?!"

"G'way Tokaki." I was tired. Couldn't he let me sleep for once?

"Shit, you manage to make everything happen to you, don't you? What'll you do to yourself next?"

I finally figured out why it was hard to open my mouth: I'd had the entire left side of my face flat on the bar. Jaw movement was kind of hindered. But my arm definitely wasn't. When I felt someone trying to pick me up I swung at them immediately. They dropped me back on my stool and I curled up again, perfectly content. There was some yelling, some muffled cursing, and then I was grabbed around the waist. My arms were pinned to my sides, I was lifted bodily from my stool, and carried kicking up the stairs.

During all this at some point I opened my eyes and made the world around me come out of its fuzzy state, and I saw an exasperated Tatara next to my door, holding it open. I tried to kick my captor again but somehow he either didn't feel the shoes connecting with his knees or managed to make parts of himself disappear.

"What is it now?" I focused on identifying speakers. Tatara.

"She's drunk." Tokaki.

A groan. Tatara. "What was she saying about acting like toddlers?"

Then I was dumped on my bed and someone left the room. I couldn't really tell who left because the room spinning around me was strangely fascinating. Around and around and around… But then the nice warm presence at the side of the bed started to walk away. Not if I had a say in it.

I lunged. I think I got his wrist.

"You're really bad, aren't you?"

"Whatcha mean?" My voice was perfect, his was still waving along.

"Must be your first time then. Look, you need to sleep this off. So give me back my hand and sleep." He attempted to pull away, but I dug in my fingers and refused to let go.

"No. You staying."

I tried to focus on him, and discovered an interesting thing. When I compared the current picture of Tokaki to others I dragged up from somewhere in my mind, he seemed a lot darker around the face. And he was. He seemed redder now, and his eyes were strangely serious. If I didn't know better (and I wasn't sure that at that point I didn't), I would've said he looked like a wild animal. He wasn't scared (Tokaki scared? You've gotta be kidding). He was almost… holding himself back?

"You staying."

He twinned and tripled then merged into one again before my eyes, but he sat on the edge of my bed, kind of close. But I didn't mind. In fact, it was a good thing, less distance for me to move. I used his arm as leverage and pulled myself up to half-sit, half-lie next to him, happily burying my face in his shoulder and snuggling in. So warm.

He said something under his breath that I didn't catch, then what kind of sounded like the same thing a bit louder. I opened my eyes to watch him curiously, and he was apparently having some kind of internal debate, because he'd almost start to move, then he'd stop, then he'd start again… it was confusing. "What you doing?"

"Shit…" He glanced down at me. He looked almost crazed. "Damnit…"

"You sick?" I asked, only minorly worried; for the most part the fact that Tokaki might be sick didn't seem to register.

"Damnit all to hell…"

"You sick?"

"I can't go on like this…"

"Can't go on like what?"

Yep, he was crazed. He proved it by suddenly grabbing me by the shoulders and pushing me back, though fortunately for him not violently, making me lie down, all rather quickly. The room still hadn't completely righted itself when I found him half on top of me, holding my upper arms tight in his hands, kissing me almost frenziedly.

Warm…