Hello there all! Sorry it's taken so long to update. I wrote a couple different things for this chapter and I just finally settled on this one. I really like it and I hope you all do as well. Thanks for the reviews and alerts and all that. Please enjoy this next chapter lol.
I own nothing but Aiden and Natalya.
Aiden George Kirk was 8 pounds and 4 ounces and 20 inches long. He was perfectly healthy, Bones said, outside and inside. Natalya too, was declared healthy. She didn't have any complications and other than being slightly sore she was fine. They were both out of medical within two days. Natalya took Aiden back to her quarters; sleeping in his dull, gray Star Fleet blankets, followed closely by James. They hadn't talked hardly at all after the euphoria of their son's birth. They weren't glaring at each other and giving each other dirty looks to make the other feel uncomfortable, but they just didn't talk or look at each other. James hated that he had caused this so close to Aiden's birth. He knew Natalya would never use their son against him, but going to her quarters to visit him was going to be extremely uncomfortable.
He wheeled Natalya into her quarters (Bones had insisted she take a wheel chair) and let her slowly get up, Aiden still in her arms. James still couldn't get over how perfect he was. Most newborn kids James had seen were kind of pink and wrinkly (or in Amanda's case, green and wrinkly) but Aiden was way cuter then any of them. James couldn't help but grin when all the nurses fawned over Aiden, squealing at how adorable he was. His kid was going to be a ladies man before he was able to walk.
James loved Aiden more than he could have imagined. He knew Natalya and him weren't in a good place right now, but never would that effect how he felt about his son. When he looked at Aiden, nothing else but his happiness mattered. James hated when he cried and loved it when Aiden would just peer up at him with those bright blue eyes. Aiden was always going to be his son and he was always going to be his father. James had never had a constant thing in his life like that. His mother had been there, but she wasn't really "there". He knew his mother tried the best he could with him, but she was to broken and hurt to give all she could as a mother.
Natalya didn't say anything as she slowly walked toward Aiden's room, setting him down gently in his crib. Aiden squirmed a bit in his blankets, but then settled back down into sleep. Natalya stared at him for a moment, a small smile on her face. "So," James said, watching that smile fade and glance over at him with that blank face. He felt a slight flicker of annoyance but pushed it back. "I thought I would stay on the couch or something. So I could help when he wakes up in the middle of the night."
Natalya moved out of the room and for a moment James thought she was going to totally ignore him. But after the door shut behind them she turned around to face him. "I can handle him at night and stuff. You don't have to stay." She said, her voice calm and even as she turned to head toward the kitchen. James gritted his teeth, trying to remain calm.
"This is part of my responsibility too. You shouldn't have to be the only one missing sleep because he's up at night crying." James stated, watching as she began to make some sandwich.
"I'm fine. I have two months before I have to go back to work. I'll make up sleep in between time. You have to work and stuff so..." She shrugged again, leaning against the counter and biting into the sandwich. James glared at her.
"I took the next week off of work. It's just on the couch Natalya-"
"I don't want you staying here." She snapped suddenly, that calm mask wavering for a moment. It was the first real emotion she had shown to him in over two days.
"I'm not going to be bugging you and stuff just taking care of our son." He snapped back, folding his arms. He was going to stand his ground on this one. Natalya's lips pursed as she chewed on her sandwich.
"I don't care. These are my quarters and I don't want you here." She hissed, her green eyes narrowing at him.
"So what? Am I not allowed to come see my son while he's here-"
"Don't be stupid!" She cried, throwing her sandwich down and glaring at him. "I would never use Aiden against you! I'm not that big a bitch. You can come during the day and see him whenever you want but I don't want you staying here at night. I don't want to have to be around you." She took several calming breaths, glancing over toward Aiden's door. "I know I'm going to have to sometimes because he's your son too, but I'm not going to be around you more than I have to."
"I get what I did with Bianca hurt you, Natalya," he sighed, running a hand through his hair, "but you have to forgive me sometime. The way things are between us isn't going to help with Aiden."
"You made it this way." She snapped, giving him an accusing glare. "You had to go and pull that shit with Bianca and then talk about all you feelings." She sneered at the last word, almost mocking him. He knew he deserved all this. He had hurt her and he knew he was going to have to take all her comments when she lashed out.
"We both know Bianca didn't mean a damn thing." He sighed, looking up at her. "And I know how I told you about how I feel wasn't the right way, but it is how I feel. I do have feelings for you." He watched her face, looking for any signs of returned feelings. Her answer at medical bay wasn't clear and she was in so much pain he wasn't sure if she was just trying to get their conversation over with. This time pain flashed over her face before smoothing out.
"It doesn't matter. Nothing is ever going to happen between us. The little trust I had for you went out the window when you pulled Bianca into bed." She muttered, glaring down at her bare feet. James flinched. Bianca would always be his biggest mistake. Natalya held grudges and this wasn't going away for a long time. She would always hold that one night over his head.
"So you're just going to go on hating me forever? How are we supposed to raise a kid together like that?" He sighed.
"You're the one who did this so-"
"Dammit Natalya! I'm sorry. If I could go back I would. Doesn't that mean anything?" He snapped, throwing his hands into the air. She gave him an angry sneer, shaking her head.
"No, James, it doesn't. Because you shouldn't have done it in the first place." She hissed. She opened her mouth to say something more, but a loud wait sounded from Aiden's room. He sighed, rubbing a hand over his face as she glared at him. "Nice, thanks." She snapped, moving over to Aiden's room. He heard Natalya's soothing voice from the other room as she murmured to their son.
"Hi, sweetie. Oh... you're okay." She muttered. She walked out a moment later, holding little Aiden in her arms and trying to comfort him as he wailed. "Can... can you just go. I can't deal with all this right now."
James looked at her, the mother of his child and the woman he wanted to so badly be with. He wanted to refuse, but that sudden desperate look in her eye made him bite back the refusal. He sighed, nodding before moving toward the door. He stopped in front of her, pressing a kiss to Aiden's red face before leaving without another word.
Nyota hated being woke up at night. Whether it was from surprise attacks or emergencies or her own daughter wailing, she hated it. Of course she would get up and help with whatever was happening. Klingon's attacking... lets go. Her daughter hungry... to the kitchen for the milk. But she gritted her teeth the whole way.
Tonight was no different. When she heard that stupid knocking at the door she wanted to scream at whoever was there. She just shoved a pillow over her head and let Spock answer it. Half the nights she was asleep, he wasn't. He didn't need half as much sleep as she did... which was extremely nice when their daughter was just born. She heard her bond mate pad to the front door of their quarters, looking to see who it was.
"Nyota," Spock whispered, shaking her shoulder just as she had begun to fall back asleep. Nyota growled, turning on her back to glare at him.
"What the hell is it?" She snapped, watching his lips twitch upward in amusement.
"Natalya is here with Aiden. She seems extremely distressed." Spock answered smoothly, leaning back up. Nyota sighed, rubbing her forehead. Four days with Aiden home and Natalya was already here. Not that Nyota hadn't expected it. Natalya was terrified of what she was going to do when Aiden was born. So Nyota sighed, throwing back the covers and shuffling out of bed. Natalya was pacing back and forth, her blond curls atop her head in a messy bun. Aiden was quiet in her arms, wrapped tightly in a small blue blanket as Natalya murmured to him softly.
"Natalya?" Nyota muttered, watching her friend turn to her with wide, tear filled eyes. Nyota felt her heart beat out of her chest. Oh, God was something wrong with Aiden already? She thought McCoy had said he was completely healthy. Natalya had carried him to full term. "Natalya, what's wrong?"
"I can't do this. I can't stand it." Natalya cried, tears leaking out of the corner of her eyes. She hugged Aiden to her, sniffling as the tears kept coming.
"Oh, hunny. I know it's hard the first few months but-"
"It's not Aiden. I love Aiden... he's..." She trailed off, glancing down at the small bundle in her arms.
"Sit down," Nyota said, gesturing toward the couch. Natalya did as she was told as Nyota headed toward the kitchen to get some mint tea. She knew her friend loved it and it was just what she needed.
"Aiden's perfect. I love him so much." Natalya whispered from the living room. "I just can't do all this... this bull shit with James."
Nyota froze, her mind clicking. Of course. James. He always had to screw everything good he had up. And now he had hurt Natalya, the mother of his kid. Nyota would rip that dumbass, womanizers head off. Natalya had just gone through 28 hours of labor giving birth to his son and now he was making her cry over God knows what. Natalya had said James wanted to step up and be a good father, but if he had backed out at the last second, Nyota would murder him. She would murder him and then she would bring him back so Spock could choke him again. "What did he do?" Nyota asked, grabbing the teakettle and filling it up. "If he backed out I swear-"
"No, he's a good dad. He loves Aiden so much." Natalya whispered, closing her eyes for a moment and biting back a sob. She hugged Aiden to her, trying to control herself. "He slept with Bianca."
Of course. If it wasn't him backing out of things it was him sleeping with someone. But Nyota didn't understand...
"Was this recently? I mean... did he do it while he was supposed to be taking care of Aiden?" Nyota asked, moving toward the living room while the tea heated up. She didn't go and sit next to Natalya and hold her. She knew her friend hated that, so she gave Natalya distance, just sitting on the couch as she watched Natalya cry.
"No... it was the night before Aiden was born." Natalya muttered, wiping at a few tears. "I caught him in bed with her. I went to tell him I was in labor and I just found them." She bit her lip, running her hands over her blond hair. "I hurt and I don't know why! And he had the balls to come and tell me he did it because he was overwhelmed by all these feelings he had about me. That he wanted to be with me and he just didn't understand what to do with all that." Natalya choked back another sob, staring down at Aiden. He watched her, blinking his bright blue eyes at her. "I can't stop hurting..."
"Oh, god." Nyota muttered. Of course. James had to go make a mess of everything.
Nyota didn't doubt that James had feelings for Natalya. She had seen the way James looked at her and how much he cared for her and their unborn child. But she didn't think James would do this, would sleep with Bianca and then tell Natalya his feelings for her. But of course this was James T. Kirk. He always had to screw something up.
"You have feelings for him too, don't you?" Nyota asked gently, watching her friend bit her lip.
"I don't know." Natalya whispered desperately. "I love him in a way... because he gave me Aiden but I don't know how I feel. It hurt so bad after Nigel cheated on me and James is that guy." Natalya sniffed, rubbing her cheek again. "He's already proven he'll hurt me, before we were even in a relationship. He says he'll change but I... I can't take that chance again."
Nyota sighed, rubbing her forehead tiredly. "I... I don't know what to say here Natalya. The only thing I can tell you is you and James have to work it out. Because he," She pointed her fingers at Aiden, who had began to drift off, "is all that matters. You and James have to be okay for him."
"I know..." Natalya whispered, staring down at her son, a small smile coming across her lips despite the tears. "But when I'm around James it just... hurts. And I-I don't want to forgive him. I hate that he made me feel like this."
"I'm sorry, Natalya. But you have to... for Aiden." Nyota whispered. "If it makes you feel better... I want to rip his head off too."
Natalya gave a watery laugh, leaning back against the chair and looking extremely tired. "It helps." She smiled, but it quickly faded. "I'll... I'll try to get over it. I'm not going to do a thing with James... but I'll work it out." She muttered, pressing a soft kiss to Aiden's forehead. "For Aiden."
Sooo there it is. Hope you enjoyed it and please review.
Ta-Ta loves.