[Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear Lonly. Happy birthday to me. Hey guys this is my present to you, and yes I'm aware I'm doing this backwards as usual]

LW: Whelp time to annoy some fairies, this won't be that long of a chapter

Demon of Storybrooke – Dream a little dream for me

Granny's diner

''Are you sitting here for a reason, or just trying to steal my breakfast?'' James asked to Emma who was opposite him staring ''I'm just waiting for Mary Margaret'' James shrugged ''Okay, well there she is'' ''ah hem, hello everyone I'm here looking for volunteers for the Miner's day festival, particularly with assisting the nuns in fundraising with the candle stand'' ''Whelp I'm gone'' James muttered and scooted past a sad Ms Blanchard.

''Hey Emma, want to help us for Miner's day?'' ''Mary Margaret, you know I'd help Astrid... and you, but with Katharine missing I have a lot of crap that needs doing and proper investigating is the big one, now I'm really sorry but I can't give another 5 minute apology to someone about this, and Astrid already received one from me yesterday evening'' Emma said before getting into her Bug and driving off, leaving a pouting M&M to go alone to the convent.

Candle Stand

'Well usually I wouldn't even think about buying one of these unless I was allowed hit you with them, but since neither of you are nuns, well I'll take 1. Actually 2, I have a friend who needs a little cheering up, remind her there's light at the end of the tunnel so to speak' 'Um okay, thanks' Mary Margaret said worryingly then Astrid came over 'Hey guys how's business? Hi James' 'things are good, we just sold 2 more candles' Leroy answered smiling (Takes some getting used to) 'Good day Astrid, I wish the Mother is blue today' James greeted then left with his candles 'What's his deal?' Leroy asked watching him leave, to which Astrid shrugged 'I'm not sure; far as I can tell there have been several disagreements between him and Mother Superior, hopefully not about his choice of profession Nagini's so cute, and it all kind of trickled down over the years to him hating all the sisters. I'm just glad I'm so low on the food chain due to incompetence, I'm the only one he even comes close to liking' 'The fact you like his snake might also be a factor.' Mary Margaret added with a grin ''That too, hey Emma called and asked if you could keep a candle in reserve for her?'' ''We're selling so few I think she could come and get 10 and we'd still be able to sell to our hearts content'' Leroy grumbled once she left, though he nodded in agreement at the time.

Sheriff's department

'Listen Jim you need to explain this to me; first you find her car, then I find out you spoke to her for 10 minutes the night she disappears, that seems suspicious' Emma explained really hoping this guy got her somewhere as she really didn't want to have to talk to her other person Katherine spoke to 'she rang me because she was hurting and I was someone she was comfortable with' 'Were you having an affair?' 'No, we were together for a while but she immediately broke it off when they found David, she said she wanted to try again' 'Sound's like you were dropped once the husband came back, that must have pissed you off' 'It wasn't like we were doing anything behind his back, we thought he'd left her or worse had died, Katherine wouldn't, couldn't cheat on David, she loved him, I thought David couldn't either until, well' 'until the rather loud and public airing of David, Katherine and Mary Margaret's dirty laundry I know. The thing is you still haven't told me what she said to you last night' 'She rang and she was crying, said she needed to get away from Storybrooke for a while, and maybe when she came back she could give it another shot, with David, or with me. I was surprised but wished her luck, and that was all' Emma sighed in annoyance, her superpower was telling her he was being honest, which meant she needed to talk to the other name on Katherine's phone log; David Nolan.

Docks

'Listen I know it doesn't look like much, but with a little sprucing up it could be very nice indeed, I'll even assist for free. So what do you say?' Leroy offered (the closest he's ever come to begging) to the man beside him who sighed 'Listen Leroy, a part of me wants to help you, but a larger part of be hates being screwed over' James growled 'But it's for a good cause, we can't sell the candles and if we don't get the money the nuns won't be able to pay their rent and Gold will make them leave Storybrooke' 'I'm aware of that, I own 10%' Leroy blanched 'Gold gave you partial ownership of something? How'd that happen?' 'Maybe Gold likes to stay on the good side of the only other snake in town, maybe it's respect, either way he accepted my payments to obtain ownership of my building and lab, as well as offering part of the convent so I can screw over the nuns myself' 'I asked before but what do you have against nuns?' James laughed 'I'm an atheist and Mother Superior is a Zealot, the rest of them are sheep with the exception of Astrid who… ah fuck it, it's really just that it's physically impossible to be truly angry with the girl. Besides I'm perfectly okay with them losing their convent, Astrid is currently the best qualified person in town' Leroy looked confused 'What?' 'She has a degree and could've gone somewhere, but instead she's doing grunt work for the blue deush nozzle' 'So that's no on buying the boat?' James smiled sadly 'It was a valiant effort, and I'm sorry that this will most likely disappoint Astrid, but I'm afraid it's a no'

Granny's – That evening

'Well we're fucked' Mary Margaret thought nursing her glass when Leroy sat down beside her 'Looks as if we had the same thoughts sister', he said ordering his own 'So did you get the money?' 'Do I look like I got the money?' 'Well no but...' 'Exactly! It was a stupid plan and now the nuns will have to leave' 'We fucked up so badly, and here I was being blinded by the light of hope I thought that despite our reputations we could do something good' Mary Margret moped into her drink 'Yeah' Leroy nodded before sitting railroad straight in his seat. The usually sour man smiled before running off leaving MM to pout before running after him yelling as to where he was going. She eventually caught up to him when he was standing on the edge of the room of the diner

''Leroy please don't'' The short man looked back at her confused ''Wait, you thought I was... no way! I could hurt someone. Besides at this height I'd do more damage to the ground than myself and we know the mayor would have me pay for the damages'' ''then what are you doing up here?'' ''Selling candles'' he said with a wide grin swinging a hammer at the electrical box, which promptly exploded killing all lights in the area.

1 hour later - Candle stand.

''We sold out!' Mary yelled, her and Leroy hugging in relief, until the guy realised what he was doing and pulled away, causing her to pout again 'Well Leroy, go give your friend our proceeds' she said, tilting her head in the sister's direction, smiling when she saw the gruff man's blush.

TBC

LW: I like Astrid/Nova she's the only fairy I know of in Once I don't hate (for the record I'm indifferent towards Tink other than the fact she's the reason OutlawQueen exists). It also reminded me why I hate Blue; she's an asshole.