She thought everything had been under control. That she'd finally figured everything out and put all of her worries and insecurities behind her. Marco and Jackie were a couple and she was cool with that and it didn't matter what happened in the past or going forward, she could be happy for her friends being happy. If that hadn't been the case she never would have set up for all three of them to go to the Love Sentence concert together. It was supposed to be a fun outing for just the three of them and give Marco an opportunity to score some points with Jackie by looking impressive in front of her. She'd even given him credit for getting them the tickets. While Marco had a series of accidents and misunderstandings that were pretty common to him, somehow they'd managed to arrive at the concert in time and take their seats for the show to begin.
That's when things changed completely. Marco was thrilled. Jackie was thrilled. Star was even thrilled going into the concert. They were all having a good time. But then that song came on, their second favorite song, Just Friends. She'd never really thought much about the lyrics before but now each word was like a pin in her heart. A small reminder of just how messed up her feelings were and how out of place she'd been at that concert. A stadium full of people kissing with those that were more than just friends, and then there was her, standing alone and holding his hand like some kind of lost child. All the while Marco and Jackie were kissing each other without a thought.
So she ran. What else could she do? She'd given Marco some half baked excuse about wanting to be closer to the action, to get out of her seat and up close and personal by the stage. But really she just wanted out of that chair and as far away from her friends as possible. The idea of having to be there and see that happen again was more than she could bear right now. Star sighed and took another small bite of her burrito. "I really am a screw up."
Just how many things had she failed at now? She'd lost her family's magical book and Glossaryck to Ludo, just barely managed to pass a test to prove she was still worthy to keep her wand, messed up her relationship with her best friend by all the near sexual encounters they'd had, lost her group of friend's favorite hang out spot when the Bounce Lounge was closed down despite their efforts to keep it open, convinced Oskar she was some easy girl to go to for a quick BJ and was doing her very best right now not to have angry feelings towards Jackie for earning Marco's heart and virginity. Yes, spying was on the list of her current screw ups, more than once. "Spying leads to crying.", she'd been warned, but like everything else she ignored the advice given to her. At least now she was taking it, if just in the form of how to eat her dinner.
With the food only halfway eaten Star set it down on her plate and just stared up at the stars, looking at the constellations she could make out in the sky. They were different than the ones on Mewni and she usually delighted in spotting them. There was even some kind of religion or magic around them based upon which one you were born under on Earth. She wondered which one belonged to her? Which one was Marco's? Somehow she'd never gotten around to asking. Of course now she was dreading having to speak with him again. Once the concert ended predictably she got a text from Marco asking where she was and she assured him she was okay and out getting something to eat. Naturally he was walking Jackie home so that would keep him busy. Maybe she could slip back into her house through the balcony without anyone noticing and avoid the awkward question as to why she'd left so early. Not that she could ever tell him the truth.
"This is where life has taken you." Star said aloud to herself. "Confused and alone, stars you don't know above you and a burrito without sugar beneath you. Troubling times for us all."
"Don't forget walking out on your favorite band's concert early." A familiar voice said from behind Star, causing her to jump in surprise and whip her head and hair around to see who snuck up on her. "Hey there, finally found you."
"Marco! Don't sneak up on me like that!" Star shouted, catching her breath as Marco sat down across from Star, taco on a tray ready to be eaten and a sugar shaker along with him.
"Wasn't trying to, you were so lost in thought you didn't even see me ride by on my bike." Marco explained, taking a bite out of his taco and savoring the flavor.
"Oh. I uh... guess I was kinda thinking pretty hard." Star admitted, surprised she'd missed him when he'd been in plain view.
"Can I ask what about?" Star stayed silent on that and Marco shrugged. "It's okay if you don't want to. I just wanted to be sure you were safe is all."
"I've got a magic wand that can shoot like a million spells. I'm pretty sure I'm safe where ever I wanna go." Star countered, though the energy in her voice was all but gone seeing him before her.
"Yeah but that doesn't mean I can't still watch out for my bestie. Besides last time you were here you destroyed a police car and went missing for a day. So call me "Safe Kid" if you want, I still feel better checking in on you."
"...thank you." Star said quietly, Marco unsure how to process that but just accepting the thanks graciously and continued to eat his taco slowly. They sat together in silence for a while until Star spoke up again. "It was the past."
"Pardon?"
"The past was what I was thinking about. Like... all the things I'd done or said and if... if it's all right or not."
"You mean about Ludo stealing Glossaryck?"
"That's part of it." Star admitted. "But also other things, just regular every day things. Have I been doing okay? Am I even living my life the way I'm supposed to?"
"Whoa whoa whoa, this sounds pretty serious." Marco said, putting his food down completely. "Why are you all of a sudden worried about this kind of thing? I thought your parents said it was fine and you didn't have to be concerned about it? You even passed that magical test thing they gave you with that weird cat monster."
"Baby. Yeah, I passed it but I almost didn't at all."
"But you did." Marco stated confidently. "I know things aren't great right now with what Ludo's done and everything, but you don't have to let that ruin every day for you. It was like you said before, you have to live your life while you still can. While there's still time to do it."
"Isn't that just reckless behavior?" Star asked which made Marco go wide eyed.
"Wow. I never expected to hear that question come from you."
"See though! It is! You even had to come out here because you knew that I might mess something up so bad I'd need help again." Star said sounding defeated, but she looked up when she felt a hand reach across the table and rest on hers.
"I came out here because I was worried about my best friend who was clearly troubled about something." Marco said, trying to reassure her. His hand on hers made her remember the concert, how she was holding his hand while he was kissing Jackie. She was torn between pulling away from his touch and gripping his hand tightly. When she didn't move Marco pulled his hand back to himself and continued. "Look, we both know you've always been a little, I dunno, weird and wild? But that's why everyone loves being around you. You make everything better just being there."
"What about the things we've done together?" Star asked soberly.
"You mean adventures? Sure I've been in danger a few times but usually we pull through before-"
"Not that." Star cut him off. "The... the other things we've done together. You know... privately?"
"Oh. Those things." Marco said, blushing a little at the memory of those past events. "I... don't regret them. Do you?" Star shook her head in response. "Do you wish we hadn't done them?"
"No." Star answered quickly, not quite ready to get this close to the problems that were this deep in her heart. "I just... I mean... I didn't want things to feel strange. For you and Jackie."
"Ah, well, I haven't told her about anything we've done before. Like those kinds of things I mean." That was probably for the best for all of them. "I mean I don't think she's concerned or anything. Everyone knows you've been in the bathroom while I was taking showers after that live stream you did."
"Should I stop doing that too?" She didn't know what was okay anymore. There were clearly lines to be drawn but she didn't know where they were and it was causing her a lot of conflict trying to navigate this new relationship.
"You can stop inviting Janna." Marco replied.
"It was only the one time." Star countered. "Besides she didn't see anything private."
"I think she just wanted to see me squirm in a place where I couldn't get away."
"Actually I'm pretty sure she wanted to see more than that." Star said with a little smile. "She didn't believe me when I said she wouldn't get a peek."
"I highly doubt Janna looks at me as anything more than someone to mess with for fun."
"You mean the girl that wanted you to call her after you get a divorce?"
"More teasing." Marco countered.
"Or she's looking for when she has a chance to move in on you." Star countered back.
"For the kill, maybe." Marco suggested, which actually got a laugh out of both of them. It was nice, being able to laugh. To forget about all the problems for a moment. After the laughter passed they both took another bite out of their food, the meal mostly gone for the both of them aside from one last bite. If that was eaten they'd have no excuse to stay so Star didn't touch hers and Marco left his alone as well. After a little bit Star noticed something out of place.
"Why did you bring the sugar shaker?" She asked confused.
"Because I thought you forgot it." He answered, offering her the shaker. "I'd never seen you eat a burrito without one."
"Thanks but I'm fine." Star said, looking over her food and Marco placing the shaker back on his tray. "I decided to try it your way."
"And?"
"It's good. Not sweet like I like but it's good."
"I see." Marco nodded. "Hey Star... I'm sorry about tonight."
"What?" She asked, genuinely confused. "Why? I ran out on you."
"I didn't think about it until on the ride over here. But everyone was together with someone except you." Star's body froze up, not expecting Marco to hit the nail on the head like that. "I mean... maybe if we'd invited like Oskar or somebody too. Made it a double date. But y'know... I just realized after I dropped Jackie off everyone was there with a date and you weren't and... I dunno. I felt stupid for not seeing it sooner. Like a bad friend."
"Marco, it's not your fault. It was my idea to invite Jackie."
"Yeah but... I still feel like that wasn't fair to you. But I don't really know how to fix it, you know?" He was trying to repair something that couldn't be fixed and she didn't want this topic to continue any further. She couldn't let it go any further. If it did then they'd get somewhere that she wasn't willing to go and it could ruin everything about their friendship. This had to stop now.
"Hey, don't even worry about it. I'm totally fine."
"Really?" Marco asked, completely confused.
"Really. Like you said, I'm the wild princess Star Butterfly. I just do things as they come to me. I wanna go out with my bestie and his girlfriend, I go. I want to go grab some grub, I grab it. If I wanted to go find someone like Oskar to be on a date with, I'd do it. It's all as it comes to me. Living my life free as a bird without worry or concern." Star put on her bravest, most assured face she could muster but Marco was looking at her for the cracks in her facade. Trying to see beyond her words.
"You really mean it?" Marco asked. "I mean just a second ago you were all worried about the past but... you're fine with this?"
"Absolutely! I was the one that told you to get together with Jackie in the first place, right?"
"Well... yeah."
"So why all the doubt? You got the girl, tiger. You've still got your bestie. There's no reason for you to be worried about anything at all."
"I... I guess so. If you're sure?"
"Super-duper-quadruple sure."
"Well, okay then. It does make me feel better to hear it directly from you." Marco said, sounding relieved. Star felt a combined sensation of relief and pain at the fact she'd kept her feelings hidden past tonight. But this was the best way for things to be. "And since you're eating your burrito my way, it's only fair I eat my food your way." With that Marco took the sugar shaker and gave his last bit of taco a covering of white sweetness.
"You're actually going to eat it like that? Didn't you call putting sugar on a taco food sacrilege?"
"Hey, you tried it the Earth way. I'm gonna do it the Mewni way." Marco explained, preparing to take the last bite. Star joined in by picking up the last of her burrito, each of them putting it into their mouths at the same time.
"Mmm!" Star said happily
"Grrrk!" Marco grumbled as he choked down the last of his taco.
"Gonna make it?"
"Barely... just barely." Marco said, panting hard. "I dunno how you can eat so much of this stuff."
"Food is anarchy, and you've just had a taste of the revolution." Star said with a grin and Marco grumbled.
"I'd like to rejoin normal food society, please." They both laughed it off and got up from the table, heading over around the building to where Marco had parked his bike. "Wanna ride along with me?"
"Beats walking back." Star said. She could have easily summoned a number of things to ride on herself to get back home but traveling along with Marco sounded like the best way to go in her mind. As they were getting ready to depart she noticed something. "Oh hey, you got a little sugar on you still."
"Really? Where?" Marco began pawing at his face to try and remove the stray bits of sweetness that had remained but somehow managed to miss them completely each time.
"Here, just let me." Star said and got closer to Marco, using her thumb to wipe away the stray bits of sugar near his lip. Afterwards she pulled her thumb to her mouth and licked off the sugar grains, enjoying the sweetness on her tongue. Though as she did she noticed Marco looking at her with slightly red cheeks? "What?"
"Uh...n-nothing. Nothing at all. It's all gone, right?" Marco asked with a nervous smile, a look that Star recognized and caused the kindling passion that had been aching in her heart to light up at the sight of it. There was a temptation now, strong and apparent. After everything that had been said tonight she should have ignored it, however...
"Actually, I think there's a little more." Star moved forward and leaned in towards Marco's face, he didn't retreat from her closing in on him. When she got up near his cheek she licked near his mouth, pulling up small traces of sugar that had been left. She could feel Marco's breath shudder at the lick, her own heart beating faster now.
"Is... is that all of it?" Marco asked hesitantly.
"There's still a little more." Star said, moving her lips towards his. Contact was made and to her delight he didn't move away from the kiss.
It started out small, little kisses against each other lips. A feeling she'd been without for a long time but was so familiar once she had it again. Soon after the kisses grew deeper, mouths parting and arms coming around each other. Marco's arms resting around her back and Stars slipping under his to grip at the back of his hoodie. She was moaning into the kiss now and didn't care how forward or obvious they were being about it in public. She was relishing the feeling too much.
Marco was groaning in return and their grip on each other began to tighten. Leaning back Marco braced himself against the wall of the restaurant and Star pushed herself hard against him, their tongues slipping against one another in a deep kiss they were lost in now. She felt her leg lift up and her body press hard down against his. There was a pressure against his jeans, one she was familiar with and eager to meet with her own hips. One of Marco's hands slid upward into her hair and against her head, fingers slipping through her golden strands with a comforting feeling against her scalp. Star moaned and shoved herself against his body, Marco grunting in return but enjoying the pressure of her against him. A little farther like this, a little more and there wouldn't be any turning back. They could be lost in pure delight, sweeter than any sugar.
They both recognized it, the moment where there would be no return. Despite the longing in their kiss they broke apart to look each other in the eyes and gauge their feelings. There was lust there, even love that at their age they couldn't recognize fully for what it was. But also realization. An awareness of what would come next would mean if they allowed it to happen. Instead of kissing further they stopped pushing against one another and simply embraced tightly in a hug. Star resting herself against his chest and Marco holding her by her head and back. Their hearts beating fast against one another.
"You... you got it." Marco said finally.
"Yeah, I guess I did." Star agreed, their hug not breaking apart. "I got all of it."
"Sure did. Looks like you didn't go tonight without a kiss after all."
"Nope." Star agreed, neither of them sounding too pleased about what had to come next. "We can't do that anymore."
"We can't." Marco agreed, seeing just how easily they could have fallen back into that sort of behavior again. But things were different now. Marco didn't want to cheat on Jackie, Star didn't want to hurt her friend. They both cared about her too much. "We can't talk about it either."
"We can't." Star agreed. "It has to stay between us."
"Between just us."
"Just us." Star repeated, gripping Marco's hoodie tightly. It had to stay between them, just friends. "I'm sorry I-"
"Don't apologize, you didn't do anything wrong." Marco said, though neither of them were sure that they didn't do something wrong. But it allowed them to ignore their desires if the put it behind them. "Everything's okay. You don't have to worry. Nothing's going to change."
"Promise?" Star asked.
"Promise. I'll always be there for you, okay?" Marco said and Star lifted her head to smile up at him.
"Okay, and I'll always be there for you."
"Thank goodness, I honestly don't know what I'd do without you." They shared a smile, things felt good suddenly. Despite that moment of weakness everything was going to be alright. "We better get going." Star agreed and after getting themselves a little calmed down they put on their biking helmets and took to the street, Marco peddling away while Star rode on the back of his bike. Now that they were more clear headed Marco went to move the conversation to more every day topics. "Your song day thing is coming up soon right?"
"Yeah." Star said, sounding annoyed at the idea of it. "I'm really not looking forward to it. Princess Songs are the worst. Oh yeah, we'll have to get you an outfit for the event too."
"I'm surprised your parents think it's okay for me to be there."
"Whaaat? C'mon, my mom and dad love you. They think you're the best."
"I hope so, I don't want to do anything that's going to embarrass you. But hey, after all of that we have our summer vacation coming up!"
"You keep talking about it but I still don't really get it other than there's no school." Star actually liked school, it was fun to go there and see all of her friends five days a week. Sure the homework was difficult. Like reality breaking difficult at times. But she still enjoyed it.
"Don't worry, I'm going to show you what it's all about. You're gonna love it."
"I can't wait!" Star said happily as the two rode off together into the night and back to their home to go to sleep with a renewed feeling of confidence in their future.
Though things wouldn't go as planned. Their carefree days would come and go, and eventually Star's Song Day wold arrive. A unique song she helped create that would end up revealing the truth her to her kingdom about everything she'd done. Including all the mistakes she had made and inadvertently the crush she had developed upon her best friend from Earth. Among the chaos caused by the revelation to the kingdom of Mewni Star would try to retreat back to Earth and her friends in the hopes of making sense of everything that had gone wrong. Only to find an old enemy had come back for her family seeking revenge.
Faced with an impossible situation, Star would finally find the courage to confess her feelings to Marco before everyone around her. Only to depart from Earth immediately afterwards that very same night, with no intention to ever return.