Look at me
Chapter ten: To progress

A/N: RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU NOTICED ICHIGO GOT DEM BUTTERFLIES IN HIS TUMMY DURING THE LAST CHAPTER! …No, just that one reviewer plus me and a friend? Well, you were right in spotting that he is! Or at least, he has! But unfortunately, Ichigo himself is far too dense to realize that. Haha! Anyways; sorry for the wait on this one, despite my having already stated that updates will be slow, I feel a bit bad that it took so long to get STARTED on this one – let alone how long it took to write it. But… We're making progress! I don't think it will end soon, but it might. I haven't exactly planned how things would end, however.

Also! Please be super patient and nice to me, considering this chapter was probably one of the hardest to write. I've been having issues with a writer's block for over a month now… So every time I sat down to write, I'd feel this nagging, headache sort of sensation that would do nothing more than irritate me. Therefore, half of this was written with that mind-set, so it's not the best it possibly could be. (And you have no idea how much I wanted to just quit and write something else. But I knew this would never get done and I'd have to get back to it regardless.) So… Nonetheless, I didn't want to spend forever trying to write it for you guys, so here it is. Also, this is probably the shortest chapter yet.

*Sōzu: A type of water fountain used in Japanese gardens.

ALSO IF THERE ARE ANY ISSUES WITH THIS OR MISSING WORDS, I BLAME FANFICTION. It said my file wasn't compatible, so I had to use the 'copy and paste' method it allows to upload chapters/new fanfics. I don't know why my document wasn't compatible, I used Microsoft word as per usual, but hey. Maybe its an error. (I tried using different internets to upload it, but it still didn't work so I gave in and copied and pasted. Oh well.)

-X-

"So…. Tell me then, Kurosaki." Keeping his back positioned correctly as his hands remained rested firmly atop each of his criss-crossed knees, Ishida continued. "Why are we doing this again?"

The faint sound of water drizzling could be heard in the background, along with the periodical tapping noise as the sōzumoved back and forth upon it's rested area. No more than a mere ten or so inches away from it sat two identical teenagers (identical referring to their personalities, that is – as well as their strange attire) as they sat straight-backed and aligned, upon a thinly carpeted floor. It had been no more than twenty minutes at the most –give or take the hour it took the older to set up, since they had seated themselves accordingly within the vacant area at the back of the shop. The younger, however, was now beginning to wonder why on earth he had agreed to do such a thing—without being told why they were doing this in the first place.

As the question registered within the Substitute's mind, brown irises remained sealed – his eyelashes resting against the skin of his cheeks as he parted his lips in the slightest to murmur out a response. "Well, it's beneficial to both the mind and body, y'know? If you concentrate on your breathing, then your body begins to relax and – uh, this stuff enters your veins, allowing you to think back and remember things that are hidden beneath your… mind's… surface…" Voice becoming quieter, more so mumbled towards the end; orange brows evidently knit together. Obviously a bit confused at his own words, yet trying to understand them at the same time – Ichigo opened his eyes and looked over at the other as the skin-tight material of his yoga outfit stretched tightly against his frame. "At least, that's what Urahara… told…me…"

And that's when Ichigo's eyebrow twitched.

A sudden burst of laughter, however muffled from behind closed doors echoed throughout the shop's inner barriers. Feeling his eyebrows crease all the more, an irritated vein bulged against the side of Ichigo's temple, revealing how aggravated he really was. "URAHARA YOU ASSHOLE! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU MADE ME FALL FOR THAT AGAIN!" Standing abruptly and knocking down a nearby table; Ichigo made his way across the room and didn't hesitate to yank open one of the many sliding doors to rush his way inside. "I'LL KILL YOU!"

Letting out a soft, yet somewhat irritated breath (whilst ignoring the two morons who were now tackling each other effortlessly) – Ishida shook his head. He should have known that when Kurosaki had asked – or more so, demanded that he bring a spare change of clothing to the Urahara Shoten with an unnatural amount of enthusiasm, it would have been for a reason such as this. The fact that Ichigo hadn't even bothered to ask clearly or do some research before-hand only showed Ishida all the more, how truly naïve the Shinigami was. (As if he hadn't already assumed such in the first place, however.) Well, both that and the fact that Ichigo was gullible enough to believe that something so simple such as yoga could regain lost memory told Ishida more than what he needed to know. Not only was Ichigo gullible, a bit naïve and childish – but he's apparently stupid as well.

Shaking his head once more and closing his eyes, thin legs separated as the archer began to stand. Ignoring the sounds of rustling bodies and argumentative growling, Ishida rolled his eyes briefly and averted his gaze. Pressing his palm to the flat of the floorboards Ishida pushed himself upwards and took a few steps forward before up-righting the table which Ichigo had so carelessly knocked over. Dusting his hands off on the front of his pants, he then made his way towards the opposite door which would allow him to exit the shop. Before leaving, however, he was wise enough to slide on a pair of loose-fitting track pants; fitting them snugly over top of the skin tight material which he previously adorned. Leaning over afterward and grasping his shoes which rested against the rack, the archer began to slide each foot into the correct piece of footwear as he readied himself to leave.

It was when he stood erect once more did the rustling noises come to a gradual halt, the sound of a door sliding open echoing in sync with the door which Uryu now opened as well.

"Oi—Ishida, wait!"

Unfortunately for Ichigo, it was too late.

Ignoring the sounds of Ichigo's protests, Ishida's bag was soon slung over his shoulder whilst he walked through the opened door. Not bothering to shut it, seeing as it would eventually slide close on its own – the archer didn't need to glance back to realize that Ichigo had hurriedly began to follow him. His over-powering spiritual pressure made it obvious enough.

And, as if on cue, the faint sound of heavy breathing soon reached the Quincy's eardrums; signalling that not only was Ichigo approaching him, but he was also close. Though, instead of doing his best as per usual to ignore the Substitute, he opted for closing his eyes whilst slowing his pace so that the other could eventually match it.

Feeling his breath catch for a moment at the abrupt change of pace, Ichigo slowed himself almost immediately afterwards when he was sure that the archer wasn't just toying with him. Of course, he realized after a few seconds pause that Ishida had slowed purposefully for his sake, not the others' – and although he was rendered confused due to the fact that Ishida had just left without him (and now he was slowing down so that he could catch up, for who knows why) he decided not to question it as his body began to relax.

Waiting for a little while after catching up to the teen as well, Ichigo soon spoke up to break the silence as he shuffled forward on his feet. "I—uh… I'm sorry about that." He murmured, muttering lamely as he looked away. Reaching up to rub the back of his neck, the Shinigami adjusted the strap of his own, shoulder bag and slung it over his arm to match the others' current positioning as well. Even though he knew he should have thought twice about using the Shop Keep's idea's (seeing as he had fooled him on countless of occasions before) it seemed to be a habit he just couldn't break. Not only that, but he was apparently gullible enough to drag Ishida into it without so much as a second thought. So… Hopefully the Quincy wouldn't be too annoyed with him.

"Its fine, Kurosaki." Replying immediately without skipping a beat, Ishida spoke clearly as he began to clear his throat. "It's not like I questioned you before-hand, so I'm not going to scold you." Lifting his gaze and sparing the teenager a sideways glance, Ishida had to resist the urge to roll his eyes at the look he received before averting his gaze. "Besides…" Feeling the corners of his lips twitch upwards, if only the slightest – he continued. "I shouldn't have expected someone like you to come up with something so… elaborate on your own which would actually work."

Rolling his eyes at the typical, 'Uryu-like' response, Ichigo glanced elsewhere once more as his eyebrows knit together. "I dunno…" Muttering quietly and glancing upwards, Ichigo scoffed. Shoving his hands into his pockets and tilting his chin, a curt, "You're beginning to sound like your old self again, at least – so it must have worked on some level." escaped him through gritted teeth, the sound resembling that a muffled mumble as he pursed his lips.

"What was that, Kurosaki?"

"Nothing."

Skeptical and disbelieving, Ishida narrowed his eyes. On one hand he knew what the other had spoken – but within the other, he pondered, if he heard him correctly. Nonetheless, he wasn't going to question it simply out of curiosity, for he knew Ichigo was baiting him (or teasing him, really) in a way that would suggest he was lightening the mood. Uryu wasn't exactly going to ruin it. (For now.)

Shaking his head and closing his eyes, Ishida pressed his chin downwards as he continued to move. However, the closer they got to his home and the further they stepped – that nagging, infuriating sensation began to crawl up the back of his spine, suggesting that something terrible was going to happen – or at least, close to it.

And that was when he felt it.

Eyes opening immediately as his chin snapped upwards, he could see the slightly raised eyebrow from the corner of his eye. Though, ignoring Kurosaki and focusing deeper on the reiatsu which they were approaching, he found his teeth gritting in frustration as he stopped abruptly; merely inches from his door. "Alright Kurosaki, you can go now. I'm quite capable of walking the rest of the way from here." Pressing his lips together and tightening his fingers around the strap of his bag, he could see the startled – taken aback look, before the signature scowl soon formed into place.

"What—? Why? What did I do? You know I was joking, right? There's no need to get mad."

Ignoring the words, though listening with half an ear – Ishida's gaze once more drifted towards his apartment as his teeth ground together. "Well it wasn't very funny, Kurosaki – and you're taking this too lightly. Spouting out some random, half-assed jokes after forcing me to do yoga which was completely useless. I mean really—it's as if you're not even trying anymore."

And that's when Ichigo glared.

Eyebrow twitching, Ichigo couldn't control the urge to retort as he took a single step forward and parted his lips. "Hey, I told you I'm going to help you get your memories back and I'm doing my best—so you don't have to be so anal and act like an asshole! If you don't want to do that sort of thing, then I understand. I was just trying it out, your highness, it's not like I'm dicking around. Besides—you were the one who went along with it!"

Although there was an unfamiliar tightening his chest at the thought of retaliating with the other, that all-too-familiar reiatsu had the archer's mind clouded. And as the bitter-sweet aroma of cigarette smoke entered the air, Ishida found his teeth gritting as he took Ichigo's bait. "I only did it to satisfy you, Kurosaki! Since you were the one who made me forget everything in the first place!"

Slightly startled by the archer's sudden outburst, or more so by the actual words used - Ichigo blinked for a moment and took a step back. For some reason, his mind told him to pressure onwards – attempt to gorge more information from the Quincy so that whatever feelings were hidden, would be brought to the surface. He had assumed such things were cleared the previous night when he had apologized to Ishida (and told him, on top of all that – how he had lost his memories) but apparently despite Ishida's forgiving nature and words, he would always feel a bit apprehensive towards Ichigo.

But then really, who could blame him?

But at the same time… Even though he wanted to ask for more, as soon as Ishida's glare met his lifted gaze, his anger triumphed over his curious nature. "Fine—" Gritting his own teeth and clenching his fist, Ichigo scowled deeply and turned away. "Since you're apparently so mad at the moment, when you were fine last night – I'll leave you alone for a bit so that you can get your head on straight." Turning all the more and shoving a hand into his pocket, Ichigo's brows creased all the more as he began to walk away. "Talk to you when you're not so moody, then."

Parting his lips to retaliate – his eyebrows furrowing as Ichigo turned away, Ishida frowned. Pursing his lips and glancing elsewhere, he remained silent – even as Ichigo spared a final glance over his shoulder, until finally, he walked away.

As the gradual distance formed between Ichigo's and his own spiritual pressure, Ishida turned slowly towards his door; squaring his shoulders and reaching for the knob as he turned the handle and stepped inside. It wasn't as though his words indicated that he was still mad at Ichigo, it was simply because of the fact that he was there. It wasn't something he had to hide from Ichigo, necessarily; he simply couldn't think of any other way to turn Ichigo away. Arguing seemed like the best bet, though for some reason he thought that had to do with his loss of memory. He wondered briefly, whether or not he could have come up with something better, had he known more about Ichigo's (and perhaps his own) personality.

Stepping through the house and tensing immediately, the archer's gaze hardened. "What are you doing here, Ryuken?" He finally spoke, lifting his eyelids and shutting the door behind himself before allowing his eyes to narrow. Watching as cerulean hues drifted towards him, their sight practically filled with ice – his brow twitched.

"I do believe you were instructed to remain within the house – and you know full well that I do not imply this one."

Rolling his eyes and removing the bag from his shoulder in an all-too-familiar routine, Ishida shrugged. "I understood what you said perfectly well, Ryuken. However—" Turning his head to face the elder Ishida, his expression softening as his tone became smug; he continued. "Just because you ordered me to do so, doesn't mean I have to listen to you as if you own me."

Watching as a cigarette was placed limply through parted lips, Ishida bristled and rolled his eyes. Ignoring the narrowed stare he received from the other, he padded his way across the apartment only to pause as Ryuken spoke.

"Someone who's weak enough to get himself hurt to this extent have no right to have privileges such as living by their lonesome."

Feeling his brows furrow once more and his eye begin to twitch, Ishida's lips parted immediately only to be interrupted.

"Might I remind you that you're still seventeen, I am still your legal guardian – therefore I can bring you back home whenever I please."

"And you're forgetting that even though I had a momentary lapse of strength I will never be so weak as to need to be assisted by the likes of you." This time his voice hardened – his tone dropping at each emphasised interval as his fists clenched at his side. "I've already regained most, if not all of my memory – therefore you have no need to be concerning yourself with my well being. If you want to feel the need to look after someone then go back to the hospital; I'm sure there are plenty of patients for you there."

Soon enough, a long exhale was prolonged – a thin puff of smoke entering the inside of Uryu's apartment as Ryuken closed his eyes. Watching, however irritably as Ryuken lowered his hand – cigarette between his fingers – it was when Ryuken's gaze lifted towards him did he frown once more, shifting.

"And that's where you're nothing more than a fool."

Confused, albeit discreetly – though obviously annoyed, Ishida's eyebrows knit even further upon his forehead as his lips parted once more. However, just as he had been interrupted before – he was halted by the sudden movement as Ryuken pushed himself from where he stood and made his way towards the door.

Remaining quiet, though still a bit skeptical – Ishida took a few steps closer as a pale hand was pressed against the doorknob. He knew that the atmosphere within the room had changed, as soon as he had spoken those final words. Yet he was almost certain that what he had said surely wouldn't be enough to discourage Ryuken – so why was he leaving now? Although… He supposed (begrudgingly) that the other would always have an upper hand when it came to fighting with words, for the next bit which were to escape Ryuken's mouth had him internally seething.

"If you have forgotten, then, I will remind you. It's your own foolishness that caused you to lose your memory in the first place, due to your meager skills which you apparently take pride in. So should you bicker or place anyone at fault, it should be towards none other than yourself. If the truth is so strongly to your disliking, I suggest you try harder next time."

Because of the effect which Ryuken's words seemed to have on the younger, Ishida's head remained bowed even as the distant 'clicking' sound echoed throughout the air, signaling that Ryuken had left. He realized that Ryuken's presence meant nothing other than the current results – however despite how prepared he had hoped himself to be, that was never the case. Not only that, but due to his lack of retaliation when the time most called for it – he knew that, whether he liked it or not, for who knows how long after – the next few days would be spent in a place elsewhere, which could no longer be labelled his 'home'. Or at least… Not after his Sensei's passing.

Clenching his hands once more and lifting his head, Ishida glanced elsewhere and turned on his heel. If he were going to be forced to do something against his will, there was nothing that said he had to go quietly.

-X-

From outside the window of a familiar apartment, orange brows creased as he glanced towards his right. Watching quietly as a man whose hair resembled the colour of the clouds, Ichigo sat back against the railing as he then began to frown.

So that was why Ishida had pushed him away.

On some level, he had known that Uryu's sudden change of behaviour had to do with something other than himself. Of course, he didn't expect Ishida to have forgiven him as quickly as he had the previous night, but he didn't exactly doubt Uryu's decisions either. (Regardless of memory or no memory, Ishida was almost always true to his word.) He supposed it was because of how sudden it was, an unexpected at that – that he failed to see, or feel, really, the spiritual pressure which wafted almost painstakingly obvious from the archers home. Yes, he was bad at sensing things and most situations could completely pass over his head – but he had gotten better over the past few months in regaining his powers, and knew how to sense those which were familiar to him.

He supposed he had been too caught up in the moment to even bother to seek it out, or try and sense anything that might have been… different, about the situation he and Uryu were in. However, he did realize that something had to have been up, before he had fully begun to walk away. He wondered as well if Ishida had noticed his arrival upon his return; though he supposed the answer was probably a negative – seeing as the argument commenced within his presence.

That being said… He wondered if Ishida's father knew too. Ishida had always gone on (whenever he opened up, that is) about why he disliked Ryuken. Of course he never went into detail, but it was plain to see that he disliked the man for valid reasons. Ichigo could tell that Ryuken didn't care whether they had an audience or not, which most likely meant that the same went for any arguments he and Uryu had partaken in, in the past as well. Kinda made him feel bad, seeing as his own childhood (however dark at one point) had gone much smoother…

Shaking his head and up-righting himself, Ichigo gave one final glance into the window of the archer's home. Ishida was no longer in sight, though he could still sense his spiritual pressure – so he was nearly certain that the other had simply entered another room. Glancing elsewhere and turning his head, he jumped from the attached balcony as he slid his hands back into his pockets.

So not only was it his fault that Ishida had lost his memories, but it was his fault he had to live with Ryuken as well. He should have known that, that would have been the major thing which would have upset Ishida the most. However… Ryuken failed to see how well the Quincy was doing, and Ichigo knew that the male wouldn't listen – even if it was his son who was voicing such facts out loud.

Sighing and shaking his head, closing his eyes in the meanwhile – Ichigo's head tilted upwards as he walked and made his way down a familiar street.

Even if Uryu wouldn't be the one whom Ryuken would listen to, there had to be someone. After all… Ichigo didn't want Ishida to have to face anything else anymore. (Or anything he disliked, really.) He felt guilty enough, regardless of having Ishida accept his apology; there was nothing he hated more than being the cause for a friends unhappiness. So that could only leave…

Ah, yeah, he'd have to be the one to do it, wouldn't he? He knew this was coming, sooner or later. After all… His father had already spoken with Ryuken, so why not him? He was the one to get Ishida into this situation in the first place, so it was only right that he get him out of it. Even if that meant…. Even if that meant having to speak to Ryuken.

Who would probably want to chop his head off.

-X-

To be continued.