Title: Sinners
Author: Ladya C. Maxine
Rating: R
Summary: see chapter one
Warnings: see chapter one
Disclaimer: I do not own Beyblade or any of its characters. All original characters belong solely to me. I am not making any money off of this. I write only to entertain.
Tuesday, January 18th, 2004
Time: 00.02
"Good evening, Officer Ivanov."
It wasn't iron courage that allowed Tala to remain as calm as he did. On the contrary, fear had paralyzed him; it had struck him so powerfully his mind felt as though it had shattered, and was now only just beginning to piece itself back together. So, rather than panic and attempt to run, he stayed where he was, processing the situation as best as he could.
The first thing that came to mind was the handgun. He'd left it on the coffee table, so it was of no use to him right now, but how long had Hiwatari been there? Did he know Tala had a gun? Did he know where it was at this exact moment?
Hiwatari had changed his clothes. Instead of his grey one piece prison uniform, he was wearing what looked like a brand new and expensive ensemble of a thick sweater over dark jeans, with new shoes. A scarf lay coiled around gloves in his lap. He didn't have a coat with him, yet Hiwatari was dry, despite the downpour outside. It had been raining all afternoon and evening, with the one exception of a brief forty-five minute lull in the weather between eight and nine. Meaning that, wherever he'd been hiding, Hiwatari had travelled to Tala's apartment during that time, and had been there ever since.
Which perfectly correlated with Yuka's account of Wolborg's behaviour: Wolborg had known that Hiwatari was there. But Wolborg was also a trained police dog who would sniff out intruders, not hide from them. How could it be that, rather than bark and attack Hiwatari, Wolborg had acted like a frightened puppy? The dog had never shown fear towards a human being his entire life.
"Are you not going to return my greeting, Officer Ivanov? How very discourteous of you," Hiwatari sighed. "After all the effort I went through to come see you, not even a 'hello'? No need to worry of what others may think: we are the only ones here."
'… The only ones here … Just me and him … No, don't let him intimidate you,' Tala told himself. Calmly, he said, "Good evening, Mr Hiwatari. How was your day? I heard it was very productive."
Hiwatari scoffed, smiling at Tala's seriousness.
"My, you should know better than to listen to rumours, officer. That's how misunderstandings come about."
"I see," Tala said. He was shaking on the inside, as were his fingers—which he hid by folding his arms—but he willed himself to stay calm, although talking to keep Hiwatari occupied and trying to think of a solution wasn't easy, as he couldn't allow himself to get distracted by his thoughts for a second so long as Hiwatari still had that scalpel close at hand. "So assuming that you killed those people, and broke out of your cell in the first place, was just one big misunderstanding. Did I just jump to conclusions again?"
"No, you understood that part well enough," Hiwatari said, playing with the scalpel as if he knew Tala had been considering it that very second. "I was just sharing with you some general tips of life."
"I don't have to listen to a word you have to say."
Tala pretended to look away in disgust, but was really searching for anything he could use as a weapon without Hiwatari noticing. He wished he'd spent more time at home because he wasn't familiar enough with this kitchen to know yet where everything was. He suspected that there was a knife block on the counter he was leaning against, but he couldn't turn around to check: if he did Hiwatari would know what he was planning and then things would only escalate from bad to worse. He could also make a blind grab behind him in hopes of grabbing a knife, but such a sudden movement would surely trigger Hiwatari to attack.
"After all the trouble I went through, returning your book, you do not have the decency to show some gratitude? By the—"
"You … how … " Tala struggled to decide on a proper response, then decided to just say everything that was going through his mind. "Gratitude? Decency? Are you really going to sit there, with the weapon you used to kill eleven people, and sulk because I'm not showering you with praise and thanks? Eleven people are dead because of you! You killed those people, spilled their blood, left behind broken families, have effectively put all of Japan into a state of national emergency, and you want me to thank you for returning a book? Don't you care at all? Just a bit, for those men and women now lying in a morgue somewhere?"
Hiwatari waited for Tala to finish his outburst, then pointed over his shoulder with his thumb at the fridge.
"By the way," he said, continuing where Tala had cut him off, "I hope you don't mind, but I finished the orange juice in your fridge. I've made sure to leave no fingerprints behind on your furniture, but I'd burn that juice carton if I were you to get rid of all incriminating DNA evidence. And you shouldn't leave food out on the stove like that—it's unsightly. You're lucky that nice old neighbour of yours never came in here to make sure you'd eaten it, or I would have had to silence her for good."
'Don't snap,' Tala ordered himself as anger was beginning to boil within him. 'Don't snap … Don't let him get you worked up … But I want … Look at him, so calm and in control … I wish … I wish I could beat him at his own game … That smile … I wish I could wipe that look off his face … I want to defeat him, to put him in his place as—'
Tala's thoughts stopped right there. He was giving in to Hiwatari's own wishes. Despite thinking otherwise, by desiring to see Hiwatari lose their battle of will and wits, he was falling into the same trap as Boris. Into the same trap Bryan had admitted being entangled in. He could not approach this situation with the intention to overpower Hiwatari. Even after five years of having complete control of Hiwatari's life, Boris had failed to score a single victory: to think that he could do so in a single night was naïve and dangerous.
He didn't have to get through to Hiwatari now. He couldn't waste time arguing with the man on morality. That could be done once Hiwatari was back behind bars, locked up and safely away from the rest of the population.
"You're sick," he said in all honesty. "Mentally, something's wrong with you. You'll never get the death penalty, because of your condition. You'll just go back to a secured environment where you can't hurt others. Hiwatari, you cannot be free. You know that."
"Of course I do," Hiwatari said. Tala clenched his teeth together when the man picked up the scalpel and began twirling it idly between his fingers. The razor flashed in the light as it spun round and round. "You talk as though I am unaware of my actions. I'm not one of those cowardly fools who claim they 'go into a haze' and have no memories of what they did. I am not schizophrenic, or paranoid. Dangerous, yes. Mental, no. Therefore, I don't wish to be locked up once more with a bunch of shrieking, drooling Neanderthals."
"And yet you came here, knowing I wouldn't wish you all the best and escort you to the front door," Tala said. "If you've come to gloat your escape, you're not going to be getting any admiration from me. If you were expecting my eternal gratitude for what you did to Boris, you won't be getting it in a million years. Whatever you came here for, Hiwatari, you're not getting it."
The scalpel stopped spinning. Hiwatari cocked his head to one side, as if trying to determine whether Tala was being serious or not. When he saw that he was, Hiwatari sighed loudly and sat upright.
"Clearly, you are still too inexperienced to realize the situation you're in, Officer Ivanov," he said. "Wiser men would know that I wouldn't have come here if I weren't one hundred per cent certain I'll be able to leave just as easily. Wiser men would know that, if a top-security cell, nine guards and one of the best security systems in Japan couldn't contain me, a single individual in an ordinary apartment couldn't either. So let's get this straight: I will leave here when I'm ready, and you aren't going to stop me."
Hiwatari rose to his feet, scalpel in hand. As the man had already made a move, Tala made his. Reaching back, he felt the handles of the knives in the knife block and grabbed whichever one he could get his fingers around first. It turned out to be a chef's knife, which was just about the best he could have hoped for.
"Stay where you are," Tala said, holding out the knife.
Hiwatari didn't even blink at the large blade.
"I do believe that, before the little incident with Boris, we were having an interesting visit that was cut short," Hiwatari said, having already rounded the table. Now there was nothing but the knife between him and Tala. "I don't like leaving things unfinished, officer."
"We can finish that conversation the way we started it: with you behind that glass barrier."
"Now, see," Hiwatari smiled as he shook the scalpel at Tala, taking yet another step closer, "there's the problem. Although I was polite enough to bid you goodbyes and all that, I was never pleased about the way our visits always ended. But I couldn't do anything about it, could I? On the other hand, now that I'm out, we can talk all night if we want to."
"Stay where you are," Tala ordered.
Hiwatari finally obeyed, but only because he was already less than a couple of feet away from Tala. It was close enough for Tala to consider attacking first, but the twirling scalpel in the man's hand, however, made him hesitate. He had only seen Hiwatari in an enclosed environment, in a calm state, where little movement was required; but the memory that this man had gone through nine fully armed, fully trained guards in less than sixty seconds made it clear that a frontal attack, even a surprise one, would most likely fail.
"You should feel blessed, Officer Ivanov."
"Enlighten me," Tala said, again stalling for time as his eyes never left the spinning scalpel. He now had his own weapon, but what to do with it?
"I cut down ten innocent people who were in my way, and went out of my way to deal with the not-so-innocent eleventh. Right now, over 127 million people are living in fear for their lives." The scalpel stopped spinning, it's razor-sharp tip aimed at Tala's chest. "But not you. You, I have no intent on killing. That would end the fun."
"And what if you eventually decide that I'm no longer 'fun'? I'll end up like Boris then, will I? I'm not going to sit around and wait for you to lose interest, Hiwatari."
"Boris was set the die the very first evening he came to talk to me in my cell," Hiwatari said, smirking at the memory. "Up until that point I'd met a lot of people who I found to be distasteful, but Boris redefined the word. I was never going to be friends with him, but, believe it or not, I never determined to kill him the moment I'd set eyes on him. It wasn't until he came to see how I'd settled in that he doomed himself. You know what I'm talking about."
"What?" Tala asked, giving up without really trying to guess.
In no hurry, Hiwatari leaned back the table.
"You didn't get his note?"
"I got that, but what … " Like a bolt out of the blue, it struck him for the first time as he pictured the note in his mind. "'I have seen the error of my ways' … What was on that tape you showed him?"
"Something that would have been highly entertaining were it not for those moments when Boris had you pinned on his desk. But, good for you for being such a fighter. And lucky for me Boris insisted on having every inch of that building under surveillance, including his office. I'd suspected what his intentions for you could have been, but seeing it on tape made killing that swine all the more satisfying."
Mortified, Tala almost lowered the knife.
"How does that relate to you?" he asked dumbly, even though it wasn't a question that would get him very far. He just needed more time … "You met him long before I did. Why did you want to kill him even way back then?"
"My first night in that institute was not in the Lair. I was placed in solitary confinement, where there were no windows or even cameras. Only one metal door, in and out, and nothing but concrete for the rest. I was still chained, sitting on the floor when Boris came in. He laid down the rules, then told me that, from then on, he would be in control of my life. He warned me that he could make my life a living hell, but also promised that, although confined, I could live the rest of my life in much comfort. All for just one thing in return. Come on, officer, you're not that naïve to not know what his condition was. He proposed the same solution to you yesterday."
Thinking of it alone made Tala shiver in disgust, but Hiwatari spoke with no discomfort or shame. He even smirked at the memory, shaking his head as if feeling sorry for the director's clumsy attempts.
"Says much about his love life, doesn't it?" he asked Tala. "He was reduced to trying to solicit sex from mental patients. Then again, perhaps the reason he never sought his desires elsewhere was because, in the past, he could get away with it. He was so certain I'd accept, too. He'd thought that, coming from the wealthy family background, I would agree to anything just to get a taste of the pampered lifestyle that he thought I was used to. You should have seen the look on his face when I turned him down. Outraged. So much so he was stupid enough to try and use force, but that only brought him within my reach and were it not for the guards hearing his screams for help I would have strangled him with the chains binding my hands. He had me moved to the Lair, but I'd already resolved to finish what I'd started. It would take me five years to do it, but the reward was worth the wait. I'm sorry you weren't there to see it."
"You think I would have just stood there and watch you kill him? Don't put me in the same sick category as yours, Hiwatari. You don't know me."
Again, Hiwatari stopped with the spinning of the scalpel.
"Don't I?" he coolly challenged, going from relaxed to stubborn. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but weren't I the one who saw right through your thin pretence when we first met? Weren't I the one who could see through your lies, and point out your flaws? If there is one thing I will openly admit to excelling in, it is knowing people. Knowing what to look for, when and where. I know how to spot anger beneath sorrow, and anxiety beneath bravery. You did try your best to block me out, but while you were pouring over the case I watched you; your every move, every twitch. Even just now, while sitting at the table, I knew you were constantly stalling in an effort to buy more time to come up a plan. You thought I didn't know that, whenever you shifted your eyes, you weren't avoiding mine, but were secretly searching for something to use against me. And yes, had you gone for those knives sooner, before I moved, it would have been a costly mistake on your part—so, good for you for waiting on that one. What it all boils down to, Officer Ivanov, is that I knew and understood everything there is about you in those first twenty minutes, whereas you've been struggling with your own identity for twenty years."
"In that case, you know I wouldn't have stood back and watch you commit murder," Tala said, standing his ground.
" … No, you wouldn't have," Hiwatari smiled. "But it would have spared me the trouble of having to come all the way over here."
"And why did you?"
The speed with which Hiwatari moved was almost too quick for Tala to follow. One second the man was standing there, leaning against the table, toying with the scalpel, and then suddenly Tala felt a force strike his hand out of nowhere. His arm was wretched back and he heard the clatter of the knife as it struck the floor. Tala was able to reverse the hold and tried to grab the knife, only for it to be kicked away, wedging tightly beneath the fridge, well beyond his reach.
Thinking fast, he swung his free elbow back but it was caught, along with his other arm, and both were folded and locked behind his back. Just as he was about to kick out the hand released him but he felt the sharp prick of the scalpel in his side. He instantly froze, afraid that any movement would drive the scalpel even deeper. The hand not wielding the scalpel wrapped its arm around his torso, pulling him back and caging him in.
It all happened so fast, so silently. Tala waited tensely, but Hiwatari did nothing more than hold on, breathing unusually loud. Tala thought the other was out of breath, then quickly dismissed the theory because Hiwatari had pulled off the whole thing with very little effort. He wasn't tired or out of breath. A shiver, strong enough for Tala to feel it against his back, coursed through Hiwatari's body and he leaned over Tala's shoulder, bringing them cheek-to-cheek.
"Let me go," Tala said slowly, softly.
The scalpel made a superficial cut down his side, silencing him. The scalpel was then raised to rest against his throat.
"Don't ruin the moment," Hiwatari said. "Besides, I have a proposition for you. You will blink once to answer 'yes', and twice if your answer is 'no'. Are you interested to hear it, now that I have your utmost attention and cooperation?"
Tala blinked once, though he pressed his head back against Hiwatari's shoulder, trying to put even the smallest sliver of space between his throat and the scalpel.
"Then let's talk about our mutual friend: Dox. What happened today—no, yesterday, with the third victim? Did you find him?"
Tala blinked once, aware of the touch of the fingers softly stroking his side.
"I will now allow you to tell me who it was."
"Wyatt Ishida."
The stroking stopped, but the scalpel pressed against his air pipe. The slightest bit more pressure and it would slice his throat open.
"Is he alive? Blink," Hiwatari said. Something had changed in his voice.
Tala blinked once, holding his breath when he felt the muscles in Hiwatari's arm tighten, as though ready to carry out the threat of decapitation. He didn't trust Hiwatari's earlier assurance that he needn't fear for his life. Tala's body instantly tensed at the thought, and Hiwatari felt it. He made a hushing sound as he moved the scalpel, leaving enough room for Tala to swallow without risking injury.
"Don't be nervous," Hiwatari said, "otherwise you might get hurt. So, Ishida's alive. But only just, from what I heard of your talk with Dr Tate. Good for you, officer; finding one alive. I don't suppose you or anyone on the force has the slightest idea of what to do next, though, and I doubt that Dox will be as lenient with the last four sinners. And you know, don't you, that everyone's waiting on you to solve this?"
Tala didn't respond in any way.
"Do you want to get Dox?" When Tala blinked he asked, "Why? Speak."
"To stop him from killing. To make Japan a safer place for its citizens," Tala said.
The arm around his waist forced him to turn around, then, in one smooth movement, lifted him up onto the counter. Tala tried to push himself off, but Hiwatari pinned him there, standing between his spread legs—though never making any body contact—and never letting the scalpel stray too far from his neck. Pushing aside the knife block, sliding it out of Tala's reach, Hiwatari used the scalpel's tip to carefully poke Tala beneath the chin, forcing his head up.
"It sounds like your professors have done a good job brainwashing you already," Hiwatari said, tapping Tala's chin with the blunt side of the scalpel, languidly resting his weight on the arm planted on the counter next to Tala's thigh. "Protect the people … Make a difference … You honestly believe you can make the world a better place?"
Tala blinked.
"You won't, Officer Ivanov," Hiwatari said bluntly, growing more and more serious as he went on. "Even if you were to round up every murderer; every child-molester; every rapist; every wife beater; every abusive parent; every con-artist; every drug-dealer; every thief; every racist; every terrorist; every politician: it would change nothing."
This time, Tala ignored the scalpel, ready to argue that point, but was silenced when the blade was placed against his lips.
"You won't agree with me," Hiwatari said, lightly tracing Tala's mouth with the scalpel. "But if you ever catch Dox, you will quickly realize the hard truth. Everyone will cheer and congratulate each other, and there will be shoulder-patting, but when the excitement has died down, and you descend from your success, back down into reality, you will see that you haven't even made a dent in the world."
The scalpel lowered back to his neck, but Hiwatari reached up with his other hand and brushed away the red hair Tala was trying to blink out of his eyes. Tucking the strands behind Tala's ear, Hiwatari's hand stayed there, cupping the side of Tala's head.
"If you wish to become a full-fledged detective in order to apprehend criminals—like the ones who killed your father—and bring them to justice, that's one thing. But if you join the force with the genuine belief that you can make a difference in the world you are only setting yourself up for dismal disappointment. No matter how much you try, you can only save a few, Officer Ivanov. For ever one person who owes you their life, you will fail to save the lives of tens of thousands. As long as there are humans, crime will prevail, because for every police officer who tries to do good, there are hundreds of average Joe's who have it in their genetic makeup to do bad."
Tala didn't realize he'd been shaking his head until Hiwatari took hold of him by the chin, stilling his movement.
"People will always kill, officer. And while you might eventually succeed in catching a killer, it will always be too late to save that first victim. You can deny it now, but there's no denying that, in time, you will become just like your fellow officers: indifferent. After just a few years of experience, things will no longer surprise you. You won't even bat an eye at the bodies that are fished out of lakes or dug up from basements. Not every case can be solved, and the corpses will have their files pushed to the back of the archives' shelves as times passes, until they are considered, no longer victims, but used storage space. So, I suggest you revel in this game between Dox and the authorities, because once he's caught, once you've officially joined a force, routine will set in, and nothing deadens the soul like a routine. You believe that catching Dox will be your making, but it will only break you." Reading Tala's eyes, Hiwatari added, "Something you want to say? You can speak easy again, if you want."
"You think that I—that the police will catch Dox," Tala said, pushing the hand holding his chin away. "How can you be so sure?"
Hiwatari didn't respond to his hand being removed, but the other hand placed itself on Tala's knee as the man leaned in.
"Because I am sure of myself, and I am going to help you catch him."
Tala leaned backwards, but that only served the unwilling invite for Hiwatari to follow him to the point where the man was hovering over him, yet still without making much physical contact. Tala never allowed himself to forget that, while having Hiwatari practically laying on top of him was worrying, it was the scalpel he had to mind.
"Are you going to tell me who he is?" he asked, licking his lips nervously.
Hiwatari didn't answer at once; he was staring, fixatedly, at Tala's mouth.
"No," he finally said when Tala didn't lick his lips again, "but I said I'd make you happy, and that's exactly what you'll be once he's in your custody."
"Why not tell me now?"
"That would be cheating, officer," Hiwatari said, tapping Tala on the tip of the nose with the harmless end of the scalpel. "I could just give you a name right now, but what can you learn from that? A vexing case like this one is a once-in-a-lifetime learning experience. Your mind is almost as sharp as this scalpel: telling you all you need to know will only dull it."
" … You said that … " Tala couldn't think. "You just berated me for thinking that catching Dox will make a difference. That it would make me 'happy'. But now you want me to catch him so that I can be happy. Which is it, Hiwatari?"
"See? Your mind needs stimulation," Hiwatari said, holding himself up on one arm while he drew invisible patterns on Tala's stomach with the scalpel. "The whole purpose of you being here, in Japan, is Dox. Of course, to you, his capture will bring happiness. Regardless of whether I agree with your idea of happiness, I promised it to you the day we met, and if getting Dox is what will put a smile on your face, then I am obliged to keep that promise.
"However," he placed the sharp blade of the scalpel right against the side of Tala's head and lowered himself even further, bringing their bodies in contact, "I never said when I'd make you happy, so I am free to bide my time and watch you plough on. Because I'm also selfish, Officer Ivanov, and there's something for me in this as well."
Resting back on his elbows, Tala was breathing heavy. He could no longer see the scalpel, and on top of that, Hiwatari had him trapped in a position that was so vulnerable that even a last-ditch attempt to free himself would be suicidal. He knew exactly where the phone was, and where the gun was, but getting to either wasn't looking very likely right now. Talking, delaying, was all he could do.
"What would that be?" he asked.
"You will get your happiness, but once the reality I spoke sets in, you will see that I was right all along, and you will crack," Hiwatari said. He repositioned himself, and Tala was surprised to find that the scalpel was no longer in the man's hands. However, the tiny window of opportunity already closed when Hiwatari caught his wrists, forcibly pinning him down for the first time. The red eyes burned into his from beneath the grey bangs and Hiwatari's mouth was twisted into a cruel grin. "You will crack, and I will make sure to be around to hear every last piece fall. Because you are a threat to me, officer. Not really my enemy, but you might just lead to my downfall, and I cannot allow that. Only one of us can win, and I have never lost a game."
"I will not play your games."
Either the way he said it or the defiant look he was giving Hiwatari made the other take his decision seriously. To Tala's further surprise, Hiwatari released him, straightened and stepped back. Sitting up, Tala searched the countertop for the scalpel, but it wasn't there. Presumably, Hiwatari still had it on his person, somewhere; his hands were empty.
"What do you want, Hiwatari? What's the point to all of this?" Tala asked.
Hiwatari, who'd been watching the ticking hand of the clock on the wall, turned to him, as if seeing him for the first time, then looked towards the living room. From the slight tilt of the head Tala knew the other was listening to something, probably the television. Hiwatari's hearing was much sharper than Tala thought, because the television's volume was low he himself could only hear an indiscernible murmur. Almost as though forgetting all about Tala, Hiwatari exited the kitchen.
'The gun!' Tala remembered with a start, and quickly followed.
The living room was empty, but the balcony doors were open, letting the bitter cold night air inside. Hiwatari was out there, leaning against the railing as he looked out over at the colourful neon glow of Tokyo's nightlife.
"You."
"What?" Tala asked, staying just inside the threshold.
"I figured out a way to escape my cell within the first three months of being placed in the Lair, but I never saw the need to. There's nothing for me out here. At least, in the institute, Boris was a fun enough distraction, but out here I'd be bored, and if there's one thing I fear, it's boredom. I probably would have stayed put until I was too old and frail to even move or remember my own name. But then, you came along."
Hiwatari turned and Tala could actually see the red gleams in his eyes.
"I enjoyed your presence, and at first I was content to simply talk to you through the barrier. But when Boris found out, and when he dragged you away, I knew you'd never return. And I wouldn't have that. Boris denied me almost everything, but I would not allow him to deny me of you."
Tala felt as though he'd been punched in the chest. He didn't even move as Hiwatari started towards him, walking at a languid pace. In his mind, he just kept repeating the same thing:
'Eleven people died because of me … Eleven people died because of me … Eleven people died because of me … Eleven people … '
"I was disgusted, angered, when I saw the footage of Boris trying to force you to submit to him in his office," Hiwatari said, standing right on the other side of the threshold, staring Tala right in the eyes. "But I must admit that I have imagined ravaging you as well."
The confession made Tala's face heat up. Remembering his own inappropriate thoughts on Hiwatari as Boris had pinned him onto the desk only made him blush more. But, he told himself, his imagination had simply been in a desperate state; desperate enough to imagine it was anyone else but Boris.
"But unlike Boris," Hiwatari went on, "I will not resort to something as brutish and primal as physical force. Even back there in the kitchen, when I had you on that counter, the desire to have you almost crippled me, but I will not lower myself to an act of rape. I needed to come out here, for some fresh air, to calm myself, yet every time I look at you … "
Hiwatari had made several suggestive comments during his visits, but Tala had brushed them off as nothing more than strategic taunts to make him uncomfortable. But now, hearing how Hiwatari had escaped and killed … how he had become so inexplicably interested in him …
No, Tala didn't want to think about that. Hiwatari wanted him to, but it could be just another one of the man's mind games.
"Where's Spencer?" Tala asked, turning his back on Hiwatari and walking away, secretly eyeing the coffee table. "Is he safe?"
But Hiwatari wasn't allowing him the room to plan; he was right behind Tala when the redhead looked back. When Hiwatari grabbed him again, it was in a loose hold around the waist.
"So thoughtful of others," Hiwatari said, his lips close enough to brush the corner of Tala's mouth. When Tala jerked away the other sighed. "That's yet another problem of yours. You give so much to others, and keep nothing for yourself."
Something gleamed between the boxes of paper on the table.
"Whereas you love no one but yourself and the sound of your own voice," Tala said, pretending to be taking a step back to get away from Hiwatari's hands while he was actually inching towards the table. There, laying in semi-plain sight, was the phone. "And this isn't a contest of self-love to begin with. This is just between you and me, and you can't win this one."
"Oh?" Hiwatari raised a brow, eyes drifting in the general direction of the phone. "And what makes you say that?"
Tala answered by lunging for the table, but Hiwatari was even quicker and managed to reach past Tala to grab the phone. But, the moment he laid hands on the phone, Hiwatari realized that Tala had tricked him, and now it was too late. Tala twisted around and aimed the gun—which had been completely concealed from Hiwatari's viewpoint—directly between the red eyes.
"Because you are insane," Tala said simply, pressing the nuzzle against the skin and grabbing the phone out of the man's hand.
He forced the other to rise and walked Hiwatari backwards, towards the balcony doors, into a more open area where the man wouldn't be able to grab or use any distractions. Hiwatari looked completely unperturbed by the gun, though he might have been slightly annoyed with himself that he'd been duped.
"You won't shoot me," Hiwatari said, looking past the barrel at Tala.
"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't."
"Because then Dox will win."
Tala's finger on the trigger trembled, but Hiwatari wasn't done.
"And furthermore, could you really shoot someone, after you saw your own father shot to death?"
Blood splatters in the snow … His father's lifeless eyes staring up at him …
"That was different," Tala said.
"It is, but not in your mind. It's frustrating, isn't it, officer? Caught between what you know you must do and what you can do. You could shoot me, and by doing so besmirch what few memories you have of your father, or you miss your one chance and hope that someone else finishes the job for you. It should be an easy enough choice for a sharp officer such as yourself, but you are conflicted, and that's the way it'll always be. You're trapped, like a wild wolf in a cage, and no matter how many times you pace those bars, there is no way to escape."
Bringing up his other hand to steady his grip, he struggled to make a comeback, but Hiwatari's observation had hit a very sensitive nerve. The man looked surreal, standing before the open balcony doors, backlit by city lights under the dark sky.
"I can't let you leave," Tala said softly.
"Believe me, I'd rather not leave," Hiwatari said, gently pushing the gun away with a finger. "I'd rather spend the night here, preferably in your willing company, but we can't all get our way. I wouldn't go running to your fellow coppers just yet: I'm worth more to you free than imprisoned. Besides, there's someone at the door."
The doorbell rang shrilly, echoing almost painfully in Tala's ears. He looked back when he heard a very familiar bark.
'Wolborg.'
"You … " he said to Hiwatari, but found himself staring at an empty spot where the fugitive had been just seconds ago. "Shit!"
Turning in a circle, he quickly established that he was alone. Even as the doorbell rang a second time, and the barking grew more frantic, he then ran out onto the balcony and looked over the side, but Hiwatari had vanished.
Like a ghost, he'd slipped away into the night.
The doorbell rang a third time, and Wolborg's barking was only getting louder. Numbly, Tala hid the gun behind him and opened the door. Wolborg tore inside, growling madly as he sniffed out the room, confirming Tala's suspicion as the scent trail led the dog out onto the balcony.
"Keep that dog quiet!" someone demanded from down the hall where four or five other heads were peeking out of their apartments to see what all the ruckus was about.
"I'm sorry, everyone," Yuka said, dressed in a woolly night robe and slippers, looking like she'd been dragged out of bed herself. "It's alright now."
Grumbling, the other tenants closed their doors.
"I didn't mean to come calling this late," Yuka said to Tala, squinting up at him with sleepy eyes. "Wolborg was well enough when I went to bed, but around fifteen minutes ago his restlessness woke me up. I tried giving him something to eat or drink to help him calm down and sleep, but he suddenly began scratching on my door. He took off quite a bit of the paint—don't worry, the door probably needed a new coating, anyway—and when I didn't react fast enough he started throwing himself at the door, as if trying to break it down. I was so worried he'd hurt himself I had no choice but to come over, as it seemed obvious that he wanted to come home. I know you don't get enough sleep as it is, so I'm sorry for waking you. Do go straight back to bed, and I'll see you later … Are you alright, dear?"
Tala hadn't heard half of her explanation. Though he was looking right at her, he wasn't fully aware of her. Still gripping the gun behind his back, he only managed an answer after she'd asked the same question three times.
"Just … I'm just tired," he said, eyes flicking from one side to the next, searching the hallway, half-expecting to see red eyes leering at him from the shadows or from around a corner.
"Do you want me to make you some special tea? It will help you settle down."
"No …No thank you. Go … We'll be alright," Tala said as Wolborg nudged him in the side. "I'll see you later, Yuka. Good night."
Confused, Yuka returned the wishes and shuffled off. The moment her back was turned Tala closed the door and locked it. He ran to the balcony doors and locked those as well. He then checked and locked every window in the apartment, throwing the curtains close as a final level of precaution. Returning to the living room, he realized he was still gripping the gun. He threw it on the couch, disgusted, and sank to the floor. Wolborg nuzzled him and he threw his arms around the furry body.
"You sensed him, didn't you?" he asked the dog. "You sensed he was in there, and you made sure to get Yuka out of here before he did anything to her."
Wolborg whined, licking Tala's face and scratching at him with a large paw.
"You did good, buddy," Tala insisted. "You saved her life. I'm proud of you."
Despite being so big, Wolborg managed to curl up into Tala's lap and the two of them just sat there, finding courage in the other's company. Turning off the television, Tala rested his head on top of Wolborg's, trying to get his head around how the night had turned out. While dozens of thoughts flitted through his mind, one haunted him the most.
He'd let Hiwatari escape.
He'd had the golden opportunity to shoot the man, and he'd chickened out.
Hiwatari escaped the asylum because of him.
Hiwatari got away again because of him.
Hiwatari was a loose cannon, far more dangerous than Dox. Had Tala not been so inexperienced, so … scared, he could have stopped Hiwatari, but he'd allowed the other to play with his mind. He chose his personal insecurities rather than the public's security, and in return for not having the guilty conscience of having killed a man, he'd allowed someone with no conscience at all the chance to go out and kill many.
"I have to tell Bryan," Tala said, reaching for the phone. "Hiwatari couldn't have gotten far … We can still get him."
Before he could finish dialling Bryan's cell, though, the phone rang, startling them. Without thinking, and his mind still on his intended plan, he answered with the other's name already on his lips
"Bryan, quick! Hiwatari—"
"Ratting me out so soon, Officer Ivanov?"
Gripping the phone, Tala looked around, but of course Hiwatari wasn't there. Still, his voice alone was almost as overpowering as his presence. Tala even held the phone away from his ear, trying to create even more distance between him and the other.
"Where are you?" he demanded, hand going for the gun that lay nearby. He could hear the sound of traffic on the other end of the line.
"You don't have to know that. All you have to bear in mind is that, were you anyone else, I would be on my way back up to you to make sure you do not make another attempt at informing anyone else of my visit. But injuring you would be a crying shame, so I'll only give you this final warning: raise the alarm, and you better make sure to inform the proper authorities to get a few body bags ready. I am not playing now, officer. Leaving you has put me in a dour enough mood as it is: don't push me."
Tala heard that this was no bluff. Informing the police would get people killed, but keeping it a secret would still put the public in danger, as well as go against his own moral code. He'd be lying to his friends and colleagues at the station, and he didn't know how long he could lie to Bryan about something this important.
Tala was caught; conflicted …
"Still pacing that cage, officer. Still looking for the exit. It never once occurred to you that perhaps there is no open door; that there is no exit. I have offered you a way out, and now you're too scared to leave the safety of the cage. You can't have it both ways. You cannot have freedom and security." The voice changed, from dead serious to conversational. "I have some personal business to attend to so I cannot visit you for a few days. Still, seeing as Dox offs one victim per week and there are three left on the list you have three weeks till the grand finale. That's not a lot of time, so choose now: accept my help, or go running to your Captain."
Accept Hiwatari's help, and effectively sell his soul to the devil; or refuse, and watch others suffer the consequences. But so long as Hiwatari's free, the danger remained … but if the police pursue him, then there definitely would be fatalities. But allowing Hiwatari to manipulate him … would it be for the good of the public? But where would it then end? How much would Hiwatari abuse his power if Tala said yes? Or was he already abusing it? No matter which he picked, it didn't change the fact that Hiwatari would have gotten his way. Hiwatari refused to return to prison, and the reason he'd left it in the first place, he claimed, was Tala.
"Back and forth, back and forth," Hiwatari sighed over the line. "Aren't you growing tired of all that pacing, officer? You may be safe in the cage, but everyone else is on the outside, including me. You can do nothing as long as you are caged … "
Wolborg's ears were flat, the sound of Hiwatari's voice alone enough to make him bury his face in Tala's side.
'It's my fault he's out there,' Tala thought. 'If I say yes, at least I'll be in contact with him. At least I might be able to negotiate with him. As long as … ' He shuddered violently. 'As long as I give him what he wants, he might cooperate in return and not kill.'
"I … " Tala said, but his mouth refused to say it out loud.
"Aye?" Hiwatari teased.
"I … I accept your help, but on one condition—"
"It's too early to talk about conditions. I will be out of town, so take the time to sit down and think things over. The case, that is. And, once you're ready, come see me."
Tala didn't argue. If he was going to try to win over the other's mercy, he had to start now by showing his trust.
"Where can I find you?" he asked.
"Doesn't really matter. Just don't be late last week. And remember: come alone."
The line went dead.
Tala dropped the phone and rested his head on fisted knuckles, rubbing his temple. He could still hear that voice in his head, and feel that body against his, and their growing familiarity was horrifying to acknowledge. He tried not to imagine what Hiwatari's demands would be, but the man had made them pretty clear. And yet, if Hiwatari did not intend to force Tala to submit to him, how was he expecting to get his way? He couldn't possibly believe that Tala would willingly …
Cringing, Tala shakily got to his feet and willed himself to think of anything else.
"Three victims … What did Hiwatari mean with only three victims? There were four cardinal sins left," he said to Wolborg, grabbing the back of the couch to steady himself. "And what does 'don't be late last week' mean? What sort of puzzle is that?"
His steps were uneasy as he walked over to the balcony doors and, taking a deep breath, parted the drapes. The balcony was empty. Opening the doors, he stepped out into the cold. Tokyo city looked to have grown and spread in size. Somewhere in there, were now two murderers. Finding either would be like finding a bloody needle in a haystack, but at least Hiwatari was willing to be found, albeit by Tala alone.
"What are you planning, Hiwatari?" Tala wondered, leaning on his elbows on the railing. "Where are you going, and why are you inviting me to come along?"
The city lights pulsed lazily. Feeling drained and tired himself, Tala turned his back on the view and headed back inside, with Wolborg trotting nervously at his feet, head low and tail between his legs.
Tbc …
A/N: Ya'll have no idea how tempted I was to go all-out yaoi in this chapter.
Read & Review, please.