Disclaimer: Star Wars belongs to Lucasfilm. My only profit from writing this story was awakening the force within myself! The entire story is written, so I'll be posting as quickly as I can edit. Please review, fav, or follow if it speaks to you.

Note: We've reached the end of Volume I. I hope you enjoy the happy ending. We've got a lot of emotional terrain ahead of us. It may take a few days to get going on Volume II, but look for a short story from Leia's perspective in the interim. Just to whet your appetite, we've got a Volume II and a Volume III coming up, both about the same length as Volume I. Thanks again for all the reviews!

Hadn't he chosen this mission so he wouldn't be stuck waiting?

Things had been going pretty well. He might have even said he was a natural at this. They had landed on the moon, debarked from the ship, and tromped through the forest, making good time to their destination. And then all hell broke loose. They'd come upon a couple rangers and before he knew it, Leia and Luke had hitched a ride on a speeder in hot pursuit of two others.

There was still no sign of them. And as he waited, he mulled over his options.

Which one would he kill first, him or her?

He should have rethought having two such personal connections on his team. It was near impossible for him to put them out of his head and focus on the rest of the troops standing by. It also didn't help matters that they'd gone off together, but he was valiantly trying to ignore that.

All mission, he had felt like a child jostling for its mother's attention. When he wasn't being a big time manly general, that is. Luke had returned with an oddly proprietary air towards Leia. And Han couldn't fail to notice it, no matter how hard he tried. It was just a guy thing. He could tell.

"Someone's coming," they immediately dropped to attention waiting to see if it was friend or foe.

When he saw the kid, Han's heart leapt into his throat.

"Luke!"

He'd decided on hugging rather than killing just as he registered a distinct lack of female conspirator.

"Where's Leia?"

Luke looked around, breathless as if from a run. "What? She didn't come back?"

Han's voice dropped to dangerous decibels.

"I thought she was with you."

"We got separated!" he said peevishly.

Han tuned him out not having time to argue.

"Take the squad ahead. We'll meet at the shield generator at O-300."

They combed the forest, only shouting or speaking to each other when they found some piece of her trail. Chewie proved to be extremely helpful as he traced her with his Wookiee smell.

Han felt the dread get heavier and heavier as they ventured deeper into the forest. What had she been thinking? How would she possibly know how to ride one of those things?

He pumped the kid for information, but Luke said he lost her early on. He did add that she was amazingly adept at navigating a speeder for having never tried it before.

"She'd be quite the pilot," Luke mused. Han had to swallow his retort. It didn't matter. What mattered was finding her.

His bad feeling got worse when he spotted the first bits of metal. He picked up the pace, following the blast path to the site of a wreckage.

"Luke! Luke!" He suddenly needed his friend - to talk him down, to prove him wrong.

He heard a twig snap and looked up to see the Jedi reappear.

"Oh, Master Luke," the robot said mournfully.

Chewie whimpered along with the sentiment.

"There's two more wrecked speeders back there." He lowered his eyes as if in shame. "I found this."

He tossed the helmet to Han. The thing was emblazoned with Leia's chosen symbols. Han had the dizzy feeling he was at a funeral, holding the last remains.

"I'm afraid that Artoo's censors can find no trace of the Princess," Threepio added, unhelpful as ever.

"I hope she's alright." It was the least he could say, but it was all he could manage, as he tried to process the weight in his hands.

Luke looked oddly pensive as Chewie perked up, on the scent again.

Han's heartbeat quickened. It had to be her.

"What, Chewie? What, Chewie?!"

Instead he lead them to what was disappointingly a hanging animal carcass.

Han deflated, truly perplexed. "Hey, I don't get it. I mean, it's just a dead animal Chewie."

"Chewie, wait, wait! Don't!" Luke's frantic yell was cut off by the revelation of the meat's true purpose. They suddenly hung, spinning and suspended from a trapper's net.

Well, this day couldn't get any worse.

It got worse.

Then it got better.

And then it got a whole lot worse.

The spacer had been through a lot of things in his life, found himself in a lot of bad situations. But he could truly say he had never been hanging above a fire about to be roasted for a banquet. It was original, to say the least. As was their furry little captors' assumption of Threepio as their god.

Yeah, he was about to be dead meat, but at least that meant Luke would be too.

"This is all your fault," Han had hissed as the little monkeys started pushing them along. He still didn't know whether to be amused or intimidated by all their sharp sticks. As he felt one stab his rear end, he decided to go with seriously pissed off.

"And how is that?" Luke asked, in that annoyingly calm voice he'd adopted these days.

"If you hadn't gone off with Leia—"

"She got on that speeder," Luke's voice filtered back from a few steps ahead. "If I hadn't followed she'd probably be dead."

"And who says she isn't?" He got another sharp jab and lowered his voice. "That speeder…"

Luke looked back at him over his shoulder and must have seen something redeeming because his voice softened just a bit. "She's not."

Han stared at him, then stumbled over a rough patch on the forest floor. The little things rushed forward, snarling as he raised his hands in a sign of cooperation. Didn't stop them from sticking him a few more times.

"How do you know that?"

He hated the hope in his voice. How the hell would Luke know anything more than he did?

"Just trust me," Luke said with that penetrating calm.

Before he took another step, Han grabbed the back of his shirt and whirled him around.

"I said," he growled, "How do you know that?"

The monkeys weren't happy now, yelping and scratching at them, but Han couldn't care less. Luke's face remained stoic, but Han could see the slight twitch of aggression at the corner of his eye.

"I can feel her," he finally said. "If she was dead, I would know."

The sweet relief of his words immediately turned sour at their implication.

"What do you—AGH!"

Han saw stars, stumbling forward into the Jedi as a rock smashed into his skull. His weight proved too much, and the two men were suddenly on the ground in a tangle of limbs. Then the blasted creatures were running all over, pounding them with there solid little feet, and wrapping their limbs with scratchy lengths of rope.

By the time they were done, he, Luke and Chewie were hanging from long poles and the droid was puttering around moaning about how appalled he was.

As they'd started marching again, Han had battled with himself. What the Kest had Luke meant back there? Memories of that first night with Chewie back in Jabba's layer assaulted him. He'd said Luke and Leia could talk to each other, somehow communicate without words.

Han hadn't put much stock in that, never really believing in things beyond his ken. But Luke had seemed so sure…and if Luke could feel Leia, did that mean she could feel him too?

He tried to pry his hands out of the ropes if only to wrap them around the Jedi's throat. He wasn't sure he'd ever felt such fierce jealousy in his life. But the more he tried to free himself, the more hard stabs he got. When one of the monkeys held a bone knife to his throat, he finally gave up.

Luke only said one thing during that endless march, muffled by the forest but burned into his skull nonetheless.

"She's getting closer."

And even though he didn't want to believe him, Han couldn't help repeating that statement over and over in his mind. He still did it even as he glanced nervously down at the firewood beneath him.

"Leia!" Luke's voice penetrated his strange musings.

He craned his neck in surprise, alerted to her position by the little creatures' movement. And even though he was practically upside down, it felt as if the world had righted itself once again.

She was breathtaking, beautiful, like an angel amidst the unexpected setting. Her hair was down and brushed out in a style he'd never seen before. He had to reassess his opinion of the little mongrels. They certainly seemed to have taken care of her.

He took it back as they jabbed their spears in her face.

"But these are my friends!" she said, speaking slowly to be understood. They went back to jabbing at him now, and he looked at her pleadingly. If he got out of here, he was breaking every single one of those sticks.

She changed tactics. "Threepio, tell them! They must be set free!"

The negotiation continued, but things were only getting worse. By the time Luke joined in, he was really starting to get nervous. He couldn't possibly die this way. Give him a Death Star, or one of those light things, but not this.

Then suddenly the air was filled with terrified yelps and…a flying droid? Golden Rod floated above the camp in his chair, sputtering in terror along with everyone else. It took Han a couple confused flicks to realize how it was happening.

Luke.

When had the kid gotten so powerful? It would have been funny, if it wasn't so terrifying.

But the thought was chased away, as Leia moved toward him through the throng of frightened bodies. They finally untied him, and he was rushing toward her, swinging her around in his enthusiasm. They're kisses where quick, but life affirming. She was here, alive and well, just like Luke said she'd be.

As the Jedi joined them, Han couldn't help feeling a lot more generous towards his old friend. But even as he smiled at them both, he felt a seed of doubt sprout somewhere in his gut. Luke had changed. If he could pull at trick like that, there was no telling what else he might be able to do. Especially when it came to the woman standing between them.

The fur-balls seemed truly interested in them now, in an decidedly less culinary sort of way. The little monkeys eventually herded them into the great room Leia had come out of. The meal they passed around was mostly vegetables and mushrooms (their meat course having turned into honored guests), but it did the job. They had bowls of tree-nuts lying around and a few pipes which wafted an herbal, heady smoke. It had been a longtime since Han had indulged in any mind altering compounds, and he wasn't at all sorry to have something to calm his nerves.

They had to be gracious guests, after all.

But the smoke wasn't quite what he expected and instead of calming him, it made him a little jumpy. A slight feeling of paranoia seeped into his consciousness. He felt even more on edge as he thought of the day awaiting them tomorrow. Leia took a small bit, but he could see that she didn't inhale. Always the smart one, his lover.

She was glued to his side again, and that's exactly where he wanted her to be. Luke was off prompting the droid-cum-god to translate for them as Han allowed himself to indulge in her nearness. And maybe show off that nearness. Just a bit.

He slipped his arm around her, exploring the rustic dress she wore. It was sexy. Oddly so. Glancing down, he could see the hint of her breasts, peeking through the ties that laced across the top of her outfit. He couldn't wait to take it off. The need to have her again, to feel himself explode within her, was almost overpowering.

The droid spoke, calling everyone in the hut to attention. Han turned his focus back to the situation at hand, reluctantly removing his arm so he wouldn't be tempted anymore than he already was.

He only understood a few words, mostly proper names and the sounds the droid played to sweeten their story. But, he'd lived it so it wasn't too hard to get the gist. When the droid came to the part about him and the carbonite, he couldn't help the bit of unease that crept back into his stomach. Leia seemed triggered by it too, nestling closer and wrapping her arms around his.

It was still so hard to imagine that she hadn't done that in a year. To him, it was all so recent, their love still so new. His head had been filled with her for so long that it was still a wonder to have her in his arms. Even as he reveled in this, he resisted the knowledge of her year alone. The Leia he'd left had just discovered what love felt like. And then to be cut off from it so cruelly. She'd have been so lonely…so…

He glanced over at Luke. If he could really sense her, the way he said, the Jedi might have felt those things too. And Luke would do anything to protect her. It was the biggest thing the two men shared.

When it was decided that they would join the tribe (fickle little bastards), the little monkeys started climbing all over him. At least they broke him out of the brooding. He attempted to be gracious, but quickly found an excuse to get out of dodge. After a quick comedy routine with the droid, he got his assurances that the little critters would back up their friendly words with action. They needed weapons, intel, and good soldiers.

Leia was gone when he turned back. He looked around the room, confused by the tumble of jumping bodies. Gods, these things had a lot of energy. Then he noticed with a sinking feeling that Luke wasn't around either. He closed his eyes, not wanting the darkness overtake him. They'd just been saved, reunited, and allied. Even if it was with a group of questionable tree monkeys. He didn't want to let jealousy ruin this night, especially if it might be his last.

He waited for her, willing himself to trust that she would return in time. He talked to Chewie, going over some of the tactical things they would have to account for now that their numbers had grown. But she still didn't return. And neither did Luke.

Finally, he couldn't take it anymore. Telling himself he was going out for a breath of air, he left the lively hut. It was a quiet scene outside. As his ears adjusted to the new level, he noticed that it wasn't quiet at all but rather pulsing with the organic hum of a living forest. Why was he always saying he hated planet life?

If he hadn't been minus one Leia, he would have declared this a pretty romantic spot. He would have nuzzled her neck and held her from behind, humming softly along with the night's music. But, she wasn't here. She was somewhere out there with Luke. He knew it in his bones.

He started walking, following the hollow feeling into the darkness of the Endor night. Finally, he turned a corner and saw them. They were parting like lovers, and he felt a part of him shrivel up and drop to the forest floor like a piece of dried bark.

Leia was alone now, and because he was a glutton for punishment and absolute idiot, he approached her.

"Hey, what's goin' on?" His voice was cheerful, uncaring.

Keep it up, buddy.

"Nothing," she said swiftly, turning away from him, "I just want to be alone for a little while."

"Nothing!" he repeated doubtfully. She had never been one to mince words with him before. And she looked truly upset. Maybe there was something really wrong.

"Come on, tell me, what's going on?"

She struggled, looking at him full on. He could see it in her expression. She wanted to confide in him, like they had taken to doing so often, but…

"I—I can't tell you."

Her admission finally sparked off the powder keg inside him.

"Could you tell Luke? Is that who you could tell?"

He wanted her to correct him, to say he was a moron.

But she whirled away, releasing an unintelligible sound of anguish out into the night.

So, he did what he always did when things got hard. He gave into anger, stalking off with a dismissive growl. But then he stopped. He had made her a promise. And himself. If he wasn't letting her go, then where was he going?

He made himself turn back and glide bravely forward, like a skater on thin ice.

"I'm sorry," he offered, feeling absurdly like a martyr as he waited for her response.

After a moment of fraught silence, she thew herself forward with a simple, "Hold me."

He felt like a prize fool as he answered her embrace with one of his own. He tried to form the question that would decide things either way. But, fear sealed his lips. Maybe he didn't want to know at all.

They made their way back to the party, having no where else to go. Han tried to summon the same feeling of relief he'd had when Luke had left them on Tatooine, but it was futile. He could feel her focus. It was all with the young Jedi, who'd vanished into the night without any explanation. Han should be angry. After all, he was the commander of this strike team. Luke was his subordinate and hadn't asked to leave. But, he didn't have the will to stoke that fire.

All he could think of was Leia. Leia, whose happy mood from so many minutes ago had vanished. Leia who looked around the party like she was watching a feast full of ghosts. He wasn't used to this kind of Leia. Sure, she could be all over the map. But usually he could follow. Now she was somewhere else: some deep, hidden place he had no idea how to get to.

The droid approached them and Han almost shut him off. This was the last thing they needed right now.

"General Solo, Princess Leia! Our gracious hosts have offered us accommodation for the night. They will be leading a party to the sleeping huts at any moment," he sounded overjoyed with himself and the whole situation. Han had to hand it to him for once. They certainly didn't want to be here right now.

They waited a few minutes more for the sleeping party to assemble. He made his way to Chewie who seemed to be thoroughly enjoying the raucous atmosphere.

"Hey pal, we're heading out. Early morning tomorrow."

Chewie asked if he should come, but Han gestured him back with more enthusiasm than he felt.

"Have your fun. Just remember you gotta show up damn early."

Chewie grunted and turned away, already heading back into the fray.

He felt a hand take his and found Leia at his side once more. She was still far away, but she leaned against him as if soaking up energy from his presence. He was so confused, so twisted. One moment he thought she was lost to him and another things felt just as they should be.

Before he could follow that path where it would lead, the elders called for silence and announced the commencement of the sleeping march. At least that's what the droid told them. They followed, buoyed along like so much flotsam, having no idea where the hanging paths would take them. Eventually they were pushed, and not over gently, into a little room that had just enough space for one floor level bed.

Han poked at it with his boot, hearing a crackle that made him think it must be stuffed with moss or pine needles. Leia stood beside him, still silent, watching as he lowed himself onto their bed for the night. It wasn't comfortable but it wasn't a hard floor either. He supposed he should be grateful for that.

She considered the bed, but then turned away, inching toward the one little window in the snug room. She looked out at the stars, visible between patches of trees.

Then she finally spoke:

"Do you think I could turn?"

If he had to guess any question, it would have taken him a million years to come up with that.

"Turn into what?" he asked, his joke reflex ever ready.

She didn't reply, still meditating on the stars.

"There's a darkness in me," she said very carefully, like she was charming a snake that had crossed her path. "I've felt it since Alderaan." He didn't know where she was going with this, but he listened intently, suddenly sure it was important. "It was part of why I worked so hard - all the time - to keep it away."

She didn't usually speak so candidly, and he could hear the otherworldly voice taking over as she continued.

"But when you…left, it was harder to ignore. I could feel it taking over, fighting for control. I was so angry, so lost. And I didn't have anybody I could confide in."

He wanted to argue, certainly one name came to mind, but he held his tongue. He would wait.

"Luke struggled with it too. We were each dealing with our own problems, our own…demons. He pulled out of it first just as I sank deeper. I had to shut off, retreat, or I knew I was going to do something…bad."

She sounded surprised by the word and shaken. He was shaken too. Leia had always been such a pillar of virtue, a ray of light, so much better than any of the sorry scum around her. It shook him to the core to hear her talk this way.

"That's when Luke came to me. He could sense it. He could tell. And he fought with me, fought for me. We started training. When we were sparring, I could let it all go, the dark and the light and just be here, be in the present. That's what brought me back."

She was still looking out the window, but her body torqued ever so slight towards him.

"Towards the end of the year, I found myself thanking the gods that you hadn't come back sooner, that you hadn't seen me that way. It would have scared you."

"Nothing about you would scare me, Leia."

She finally turned, her face shrouded in shadow.

"You don't know that," she said, her voice small and still.

"I do," he replied, letting his love for her flood through him once more.

She sighed a pained little sound and turned back to the sky.

"I can feel him," she breathed, a shudder running through her. "Luke shouldn't have told me."

He didn't have any protections, his old shields thrown away long ago. The pain that hit him was overwhelming and deadly. She was thinking of him even as he laid his heart at her feet.

He waited for the anger, his old friend, that aggressive energy that always had his back. But it didn't come. Not in light of this revelation. Luke had saved her, brought her back from a place she never wanted to go again. He couldn't hate him. How could he, when it was his love that Luke had set free?

And the truth was he loved Luke too, despite all the turmoil of the last week. He'd gone back as much for him as he had for Leia that first time. He'd never had a brother. Though his relationship with Chewie was strong, they were colleagues, mates, equals. But Luke had needed a mentor, a protector as he was thrust into the big wide world. And once Han had returned from that first Death Star, he'd accidentally become that.

So if the anger didn't come, all he was left with was this love. This twin love for his two closest friends. And if that was what he had, how could he wish them unhappy?

Leia had remained mute through all of this, still with her thoughts and the stars.

He needed to touch her, needed to have one more night in her arms. Han had no idea what tomorrow would bring, but he had lost his inner battle. His ego couldn't win out over the love he felt for these two people.

So, he would hold her tonight and take from her the strength to do the right thing. But not just yet, tomorrow he could break another promise, tomorrow he could let her go. Tonight he would love her with all the fierceness he felt. At least he would leave her with that.

"Come here, dove," he whispered, not knowing where the name had come from.

It seemed to work though, calling her back from her perch above the trees.

She lowered herself to the bed and let him pull her in, coming to rest with her legs around his hips. They were sitting as close as two people can, his back resting against the fragrant piney wall of the hut, her chest pressed against his.

They breathed in time for a little while. It was one of his favorite things, and he could feel the grief ball up inside his throat at the thought of losing it. But, he forced it down, intent on staying here with her in this moment.

"You are the brightest light I have ever seen," he said to her, not knowing where the words flowed from. "I've been around this whole galaxy. I've seen a lot of things. But none of them compare to you."

She seemed to bask in his words, her hands coming to stroke his hair, encouraging him to keep going.

"But just like in space, for the light to shine through, there's gotta be some darkness. A whole lot of it in fact."

She smiled a little, appreciating his pirate wisdom.

"You just gotta accept that. And shine on anyway."

Her breath hitched a little as he finished, and he hoped to the gods she didn't cry. He couldn't bear her tears, and he didn't know if he had the strength to face them right now.

"What if I can't?" she asked, a little girl again.

"Don't give me that," he found his humor - the best antidote for her tears, "I know you too well."

She laughed now, lightly but with real warmth.

"You're too damn stubborn to turn. You'd drive them crazy before they even came close."

He didn't know who he was talking about exactly, but this made her laugh again, really laugh this time. She burrowed her head into his shoulder and shook a little from mirth rather than fear.

"Now I know why I love you," she said.

He winced a little at that, but kept to his current game. "Now you know? You didn't before?"

He could feel her lips quirk against his shoulder.

"It's a constant mystery, Solo. But I keep picking up on clues."

It was his turn to laugh, albeit weakly.

"Well, you'll have to tell me if you ever figure it out."

She shook her head.

"Some things are supposed to remain a mystery." And then, "Do you know why you love me?"

He considered that, trying to think past the physical sensations of the moment and onto higher things.

"You're pausing too long," she said, teeth pressing against his neck.

He sighed. "I love everything about you," he said simply.

She nipped him now. "No you don't. You couldn't possibly."

He hoisted her up a bit, keeping her mouth away from striking distance.

She frowned almost playfully at him, the drama of the evening banished for the moment.

"My stubbornness."

"Commitment."

"Recklessness."

"Bravery."

"The way I always scold you," she seemed genuinely worried about this one.

"I usually deserve it," he replied.

"That weird birthmark on my back," she challenged.

"It's how I know I'm bedding the right woman."

She swatted him, but was smiling all the same.

"I'll find you out one of these days, Captain. You can't be this good," she said, giving up for the moment.

"I'm sure you will," he replied, wondering if it were true.

She was looking down at him, breath coming a little more deeply now.

He felt her move against him, settle herself more snugly, a lock against a key.

"I don't know how I lived without this," she breathed.

The words were balm to his heart and he felt them ease his wound.

"Well, you don't have to anymore." Unless you want to.

She moved against him again, arching back a little at the pleasure of the sensation.

He tugged at the strings of her dress, wondering how far he could get without releasing her. But then she reached down and hiked the skirt over her hips, revealing a lack of anything else underneath.

He wanted her desperately now, was reaching down to his pants, trying to undo them with clumsy fingers. She moved them aside and took on the work while he explored her silken center. If he had known she was bare the whole night, he would have snuck off with her long ago.

And maybe avoided that scene…

But the fleeting regret was chased away, as she succeeded in releasing him. She adjusted herself, bringing her knees briefly under her, so she could join them in the way they both craved.

They each had things they wanted to forget, as their frenzied coupling commenced. He let himself be carried off, his conscious mind only focused on the incredible sensations her body created.

They kissed as they rocked, moaning and growling into each other's mouths, normal words incapable of expressing what they wanted to say. He wished they'd taken off their clothes, needing to feel every inch of her against his skin, but it was too late. There was no going back now.

He waited for her, reaching down to help her along, keeping time with their rhythm as his thumb gently stroked her. She cried out, forgetting to stifle herself as her orgasm came swift and strong. He picked up the pace as much as he could at this awkward angle and mouthed her name as he released himself into her, falling over the edge into that endless abyss.

They remained this way for some time, neither willing to break the contact. He could feel the drowsiness overtake him and from her tired weight against his shoulder, he could tell she was feeling it too. But he didn't want to leave. Not her warmth or her person.

Finally out of sheer exhaustion, they levered themselves into a sleeping position, only breaking apart long enough to find their way under the rough wool blanket. He held her against him, her back to his front, feeling almost as if they were one person. He forgot where she ended and he began. They didn't have long to sleep. He could feel dawn approaching, a little surprised at his latent land instincts. But he fell asleep anyway, needing to rest before they fought another battle tomorrow.

The Battle of Endor turned out to be a fair bit easier to win than the battle for Leia's love. He felt ridiculous even thinking about it that way, but he'd always been better in a life or death situation than in matters of the heart.

They were finished now, rounding up white suits, and coughing through a haze of smoke from the now-smoldering remains of the shield generator. The rest was up to Lando and his fighters.

Leia was sitting with her back up against a fallen log, waiting patiently for him to tend to her injury. She had been amazing, staying in the middle of the action even after she'd been hit.

He hadn't been able to help the "I love you" that tumbled out when she'd pulled a blaster on their foes. She'd given him an eloquent smile and quoted him slyly.

"I know."

He'd forgot he said that back at Bespin. And he couldn't help but curse himself for it now. What kind of answer was that?

He was just about done. The enemy was tied up, and he knew from experience the strength of those trapper's nets. But he kept them heavily guarded just in case.

He looked at the sky, wondering when the final blow would hit. Would it be on their side or the Empire's? If Lando wasn't successful, this celebration could be over pretty quick.

The thought made him turn back to Leia and head purposely to her side. She hadn't lost much blood; it didn't look like the wound was troubling her a lot at the moment. Still, he'd have a look just to be sure.

"Is it done?" she asked, already knowing.

"As done as it can be. Now we wait," he said, sinking to the forest floor next to her.

He reached for her bandage, unable to keep from remembering the last time he'd tended such a wound. Hadn't been wrong of him to fight his feelings then. In the last few years, she had not only claimed his heart but become it. If she went, that vital organ would go with her. He didn't think a guy could live without a heart.

It gave a familiar lurch as she spoke:

"Luke is up there."

As if he had forgotten.

"He would have been better off down here," he said, honestly wishing the kid was out of harm's way.

"He had to go…" she said, turning back to him, a new thought forming on her lips—

A sudden roar like a thousand peals of thunder filled the air above them and the little Ewoks started jumping up and down, squealing in joy and triumph. He looked behind him to see a huge cloud of gas and sparks in the sky, and he knew without a doubt their attack had been a success.

It was an awesome sight. He gawked at it for a moment before remembering Leia and the worry she must be feeling.

"I'm sure Luke wasn't on that thing when it blew." He didn't know if it was true, but he knew that's what she wanted to hear.

She stared straight ahead, seeming to focus on nothing or maybe on that place deep inside her.

"He wasn't. I can feel it," she said wondrously. So, it was true. What Luke had said, what he had feared.

Her face was soft and her eyes misty. He knew that look. With heartbreaking clarity he knew where he had seen it, reflected back into his own eyes before the carbon freezing had begun.

"You love him…" he said.

She looked at him searchingly as if parsing his meaning.

He tried to smile, tried to do anything but let his heart break inside his chest. "Don't you?"

She didn't even hesitate, "Yes."

"Alright," his mouth was moving on its own, following the script he'd set the night before. "I understand. Fine! When he comes back," he looked, down hating to break yet another promise to himself, "I won't get in the way."

He might as well just stop making them anyway. Promises were stupid, fickle things.

She let out a short breath that bordered on impatient—

He would leave her, go to the ends of the galaxy…

"No, it's not like that at all," she said in the sweetest, surest tone—

Anywhere as long as he didn't have to see them…

She leaned forward like a priestess giving a blessing—

It would kill him, but he would do it…

"He's my brother," she said—

He could be strong enough, he could…Wait, this wasn't the script. This was his dramatic moment, and…

She was kissing him on the mouth, bringing him back to life and Endor.

He pulled away, her words finally piercing his farce. Luke was her brother. Her brother! He didn't know how it was possible, figured there was a whole lot more to that story. But he laughed, at himself, at her, at everything and she joined him, obviously in on the joke.

Then he was pulling her to him, sealing their new reality with a kiss of his own. If he had a ring he'd have proposed right then. It would have been the perfect moment, in the afterglow of triumph, in the midst of this celebration. If he'd only…but then he decided to let it go. He'd have his moment. And besides, he had to let go of something, since he wasn't letting go of her after all.

The End of Volume I