Yay! next chapter!

i'm sorry if the beginnign kind of drags on, i just felt the need to put in some explanations rather than writing chapetr about what happens.

i hope it's ok :/

enjoy!

Chapter 10

The past two weeks have been amazing. Not because my brother is back (though that's definitely a big part of it), not because it's quiet and we have time to ourselves, and yes – not just because I'm back with Stefan (though that's a huge part of it). No. what made this week so great is that for the first time in a long time, I'm myself again. And Stefan has a big part to play in that.

Because everyone thinks Jeremy died in the fire that destroyed our house he hasn't been able to leave the house and go anywhere, but none of us mind it for now. we're fine just hanging out in the house and letting Caroline do the shopping for us. not that we have mich choice, seeing as she refuses to let us do anything alone.

Damon, meanwhile, disappeared right after he saw Jeremy was back. None of us know why, but Stefan says we just need to give him some time. He's had a rough few months.

So now I wake up every morning simply and easily to the sound of life. The first things I hear when I open my eyes are small, but they mean so much to me. I hear Jeremy wandering in the kitchen downstairs, pigging on anything he can find. I hear Bonnie or Caroline walk through the door, and usually I hear Bonnie running to Jeremy, and I can hear the muffled grunt that escapes his mouth when she crushes him with a hug. I can hear Stefan coming up the stairs to wake me up when it's past 11. but most of all, I can hear and feel my heart beat fast with excitement every time I'm near Stefan, and anxiously every time I'm not next to my brother. And that beating heart, for me, symbols that fact that I am still really and truly alive.

"Time to wake up, sleeping beauty…" sunlight floods the room as Stefan draws the curtains to reveal the sun shining at its brightest at noon. I open my eyes and smile at Stefan.

"Hi there…" I whisper, sleep scratching my throat. I stretch and Stefan comes to sit on the bed next to me.

"Hey," he answers back, leaning in to give me a kiss on the cheek. His kiss stays there even after he pulls away. I grin at him, "So what are we gonna do today?" I wait for the usual smile that greets the word 'we' but this time I don't get it. Instead he averts his eyes.

"Elena… I don't think we'll be doing anything today." I sit up.

"Why? What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, it's just-"

"Don't do that," I warn, looking into his eyes and seeing that they look tired and miserable. "Something's wrong, I can tell. Come on… you can talk to me, you know that."

"Of course I know that," he says, his voice cracking. He looks at me helplessly, "it's just… I don't think you should be involved in this business." He shrugs as if it's nothing, but I can tell it's more than nothing. Much more than that.

"Tell me what's wrong." I say, cupping his face in my hands and forcing him to look at me. He shakes his head. "Tell me and I can help you," I say softly. He purses his lips for a second and then nods.

"Damon… he came back." My heart stops at the way he says it.

"Is he ok?" I ask, starting to freak out when he just looks at me. He shakes his head, "he's been bitten by a werewolf."

"Oh god… oh no, not again! We need Klaus. Have someone call Klaus now, and-"

"Elena," he says softly, "he won't take the blood even if we call Klaus."

"What – why?" he looks at me sadly.

"He says he wants to die." A tear drips down his cheek, and I feel my eyes water too. "What?" I squeak, "no, no way. Why would he want to die? Oh god," I say, suddenly realizing something, "It's because of us… because we're together, right?"

"I don't know, Elena," Stefan sounds desperate, "I don't know. If I knew, I could fix it – or at least try."

"Can I talk to him? Maybe I can figure it out. Please," I say, watching Stefan's face change as he prepares to say 'no'. I look at him softly.

"Nothing will happen to me from talking to him."

"I know," he says, "it's just… please be careful," I give him a kiss. "I'll be fine. Where is he?"

"In his room." I give him another hasty kiss on the lips and run out my door, still wearing my PJs.

"I love you," I say as I step out of the room. "I love you too," comes his response from inside.

"Damon," I say quietly, stepping into the cold, dark room. He lifts his head from the pillows and looks at me for a second before letting it fall carelessly back into the pillows.

"Elena," he says, his voice raspy. "So how have you been doing?" he asks conversationally, as if he doesn't matter at all.

"I've been doing well, actually. I missed you, but it was fine. You, on the other hand," I say, walking slowly and sitting down on the edge of his bed, "look terrible. What happened to you?" I say, reaching out to touch his burning, sweaty forehead. I can see the bite mark on his wrist, red and swollen and full of dry blood. He chuckles humorlessly, "what do you care about me? You left me in the dust, just like everybody else."

"That's not true and you know it. I never wanted to leave you or hurt you," I say, trailing my fingers around the wound gently. He winces as my cold fingers touch the edge of the expanding mark, and I move them right away.

"So how come I did get hurt in the end? How come, once again, I was left alone?"

"I'm sorry, Damon-"

"Don't be sorry," he says, "I don't need your pity. I just want to understand – what's wrong with me?" tears stream silently down his cheeks as he looks at me. He talks slowly, and his breath comes out in shallow gasps. I sigh.

"Nothing's wrong with you, Damon. You're amazing. You're strong, and powerful, and independent, and you have a good heart, even if your hands are dripping with blood." He chuckles again.

"Funny you should say that, seeing as your boyfriend has over a hundred victims."

"Yes, he does," I agree. "But he regrets killing them every single day of his life. And I love him for that."

"And you don't think I regret the lives that were lost because of me?" he snaps, and I wince at the hurt in his voice. There is no anger, no fury – just a pure need to understand what he did wrong.

"Damon, I understand that you're hurt," I say, reaching out to touch his arm, but it's burning and I let go quickly, "but that doesn't mean you need to die because of it. I do still love you. You have to understand that I love you. Don't you dare think I don't. And I don't want to lose you. It's just… I loved Stefan first. He was there, and from the second I saw him I just-"

"Felt something click, fell in love with his eyes, blah blah blah, all those love at first sight things. Yeah, I get it. But what I don't get," his voice grows stronger, "is how come it's always him. He always gets the girl."

"Damon-"

"Do you know that in my whole life, no one other than my mother ever loved me more than they loved him? And those who did, well… they were sired, or compelled, or didn't know who I really was, etc. etc." he looks so sad, my heart breaks.

"Damon, I'm sure there were several women in your life who truly loved you. I truly loved you, and I still do. Why don't you just close your eyes, and think back to the best times of your life, when you had a woman that you cared about and you knew she cared about you. Do it," I urge, and he closes his eyes. I see his face relax as he enters the past in his mind, and I watch his expressions as he remembers. His eyes suddenly burst open.

"Rose," he says, looking at me.

"Who?"

"Rose," a small, sad smile spreads on his face when he mentions her name.

"Rose as in, kidnapped me for Elijah, ran away when we needed help and then tried to kill me when she was dying? That Rose?" I say, confused. He nods.

"I had no idea you cared about her,' I say, looking at him softly. He looks back sadly, "neither did I… until I lost her." His face suddenly lights up, and he finds the strength to reach out and grab my hand. I jump at his burning skin, but I don't move away.

"Tell Caroline to call Klaus, I'll take his blood."

"Really?" I say, surprised at the sudden change of events.

"Yes. But on one condition."

"Which?" he turns to look at me pleadingly.

"Tell Bonnie to do the same spell she did to save Jeremy. Please… bring Rose back to me."

that's it for now!

this one was longer than the others...

i hope you liked it!

review please and let me know what you think of Rose coming back... ;)