No Need For Achika
By Galaxy1001D
Tenchi Muyo and all related characters are © AIC/Pioneer/Funimation. This story has been written solely for entertainment. The views expressed herein do not necessarily express the opinions of AIC/Pioneer/Funimation, the author, or this website.
Chapter Ten: You Can't Go Back
"Why can't you send me back?" Achika demanded. "You went back in time and brought me here, didn't you? You can take me back to my own time and place the same way!"
Washu's bandaged face looked awfully surly as she glared at Achika Masaki from the confines of her bed. With her arm in a sling and her leg in a cast, the battered genius was a pathetic sight. "I've already told you, we are the victims of a predestination paradox; there's nothing we can do. You're just going to have to get used to living in the future."
"Just what is a 'predestination paradox' anyway?" Achika asked warily.
Washu sighed. "It means that I was destined to go back in time and abduct you. I really hate those. They destroy any sense of free will."
"I still can't believe that Daddy and the boys did this to you," Achika shivered as she gazed at Washu's injuries.
"They didn't," Washu grumbled. "Mihoshi did this by activating my attack robot while she was trying to 'save' me from your relatives. It wasn't finished. I hadn't gotten around to filling the 'friendly' file yet, so it registered everybody as a hostile. If it weren't for Tenchi and your father, I'd probably be dead."
"Oh," Achika put her hand over her mouth in horror.
"The robot also destroyed the time machine, and after this fiasco, good riddance," Washu muttered. "This isn't easy for me either you know. I'm the greatest genius in the universe and I made such an elementary mistake. I wanted to heal the rift in your son's heart, but it turns out it was me who caused it. How do you think that makes me feel?"
"Excuse me if I seem unsympathetic," Achika crossed her arms, "but all of my friends and neighbors believe that I've been dead for twelve years. How am I supposed to restart my life now?"
"I dunno," Washu shrugged. "Just tell everybody you're Achika's cousin and you have the same name or something."
"I missed seeing my little boy grow up," Achika continued. "My little Tenchi is now a man and he doesn't need me. I never saw him ride a bike for the first time, I never saw him off on his first day of school, I missed everything!"
"I'm glad that you're not making me feel worse," Washu muttered sarcastically.
"And Nobuyuki!" Achika blushed. "He's bound to have moved on by now! What if he has a girlfriend or something? What do I do then? Our marriage vows were 'until death do us part' and I died twelve years ago!"
"Nobuyuki's a terrible flirt, but as far as I can tell he doesn't have a girlfriend," Washu assured her. "Relax. Nobody has replaced you. Personally, I think that all of the girls here will be thankful that you're back."
"What do you mean by that?" By now Achika had learned to pay very close attention to what the little genius said.
"Well, how do I put this?" The redhead attempted to roll her eyes, but since one of them was swollen shut she only managed to grimace strangely. "Since you passed away, your husband has become quite a um, voyeur."
"Voyeur?" Achika frowned in disbelief.
"Yeah, it's as if he's afraid to get involved again," Washu shrugged. "So rather than enter a deep relationship with a woman, he's settled for um… spying on them."
"Spying on them?" Achika shook her head. "That doesn't sound like Nobuyuki."
"Hey, it's not like he's getting fresh or anything," Washu assured her. "He just likes to uh, watch us sometimes, that's all."
Achika's mouth was hanging open in disbelief.
"Oops," Washu blushed. "Forget I said anything."
Achika just looked away and seemed to go into a trance.
Mihoshi entered the room, dressed in what appeared to be a 'sexy nurse' Halloween costume. "Okay, time to take your temperature," she chirped happily as she held a thermometer. "Just turn over and I'll stick it right in."
"Mihoshi, I'm not a little kid," Washu muttered snippily. "I don't need an anal thermometer." She looked at the dizzy blonde more closely. "Hey! Is that my nurse's outfit? That thing doesn't even fit you!"
"I know what you mean," Mihoshi blushed as she glanced down at her bare legs. "I think I stretched the crotch out. You sure are little, Miss Washu. You're like a little pixie. Going through your closet is like shopping for Sasami, you really are…" her voice trailed away when she saw the murderous look Washu was giving her.
Dumbstruck by the disclosure, Achika staggered out of the hospital room into a more technical part of Washu's transdimensional sanctum. Scorched wall panels were open exposing wires, circuits and motherboards. Ryoko and Kiyone were attempting to repair some of the damage.
Ryoko was on her back and was halfway inside an opening in the wall at floor level. Only her legs were sticking out, revealing her brown boots and the bottom half of her blue kimono. "All right!" she called. "Try it now!"
"Okay," the teal haired Kiyone said as she flicked a switch on a breaker panel. "Here goes nothing."
A burst of sparks flashed from exposed circuitry as smoke erupted from the opening Ryoko was in.
"Ahh!" Ryoko screamed as her legs flailed helplessly. "Turn it off! Turn it off! Turn it off right now!"
Achika just wandered by as sirens and red flashing lights activated. Kiyone yelped and madly flicked switches to deactivate the power.
Soon the stranded housewife was exiting the doorway under the stairs and was back inside her house. But was it really her house anymore? She was an alien on her own planet. If Earth was her planet in the first place. Everything they told her was so hard to believe, but after witnessing Washu's lab anything seemed possible.
She glanced around, searching for her husband. She wandered into the kitchen when she heard conversation. "Hello?" the slender yet curvaceous housewife called shyly. Inside were the two sisters, Ayeka and Sasami, princesses from the planet Jurai and distant relatives from the spaceman side of the family tree.
"Oh, how sweet!" Achika cooed, relieved to see some ordinary activities in the house. "You're teaching little Sasami how to cook!"
"What?" Sasami blinked in surprise.
"Huh?" Ayeka also seemed startled. "Oh yes!" the first princess of Juria smiled nervously. "That's right! I'm teaching Sasami!"
"No you're not," her sister frowned. "You're helping me."
"Yes! Ayeka hugged her sister tightly and grimaced with exaggerated cheer. "That's right! I'm helping her! She really wanted to impress you, Lady Achika, so I'm letting her cook the meal under my supervision!"
"I… Ayeka," Sasami choked under her sister's embrace. "I… can't… breathe…"
"Is everything all right?" Concerned, Achika put her hand on her chin.
"Yes! Yes!" a sweating Ayeka assured her. "Everything is just fine!" she exclaimed as she released her sister.
"Do you need any help?" Achika asked, for she was used to being the cook.
"Oh no," Ayeka shook her head. "Not on your first night back!"
"Of course not!" Sasami agreed. "This meal is to honor you! It's your welcome back dinner!"
"Your resurrection feast," Ayeka added. "We would be poor hosts, er… I mean guests, if we had you cook for so many people on your first night back." The princess put her hand over her mouth and glanced at her little sister realizing the faux pas she had made. From Achika's point of view this was her house and the princesses were guests, not occupants, while for the princesses, it was Lady Achika who was the new arrival.
Sasami returned her glance, and then looked back at Tenchi's mother.
Ayeka regained her composure and took charge. She walked forward and put her hand on Achika's arm. "Lady Achika, you've traveled in time over twelve years. It's going to be hard fitting in again now that you're in the future. We just want to make this easier on you, that's all. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm right here."
"Thank you, Ayeka," Achika gasped and put her hand over her mouth. "I mean, 'Your Highness'. I'm terribly sorry, where are my manners?"
Ayeka's laugh was like the tinkling of little bells. "Don't worry about it, we're all family here. Thanks to your father, you can lay claim to being the first princess of Jurai just as much as I can. I'll call you 'Achika' if you call me 'Ayeka'."
"Oh," Achika blinked as she took it all in, then smiled genially. "Thank you Lady Ayeka. Have you seen Nobuyuki and Tenchi?"
Ayeka returned her smile. "Yes, they're outside in the garden. Something about putting up a scarecrow I think."
"Oh, okay," Achika looked insecure, ironically making her seem younger, closer to the age that Ayeka remembered her. "I guess I'll go look for them."
"Okay," Ayeka nodded. "We'll be right here if you need us," she added.
"All right, goodbye," the housewife waved as she left.
"I hope she'll be all right," Sasami sighed after she left.
"She will, Sasami," her sister assured her. "Remember what house she's in. In this house miracles happen." She smiled to reassure her sister.
Outside Achika was surprised to find a field that seemed to be growing nothing but carrots. Were they supplementing their income by selling carrots at the market? The carrot field seemed to go right to the treeline. Her husband and her son were erecting a scarecrow that seemed to be made of industrial metal rather than old clothes stuffed with hay. Upon close inspection it appeared to be the shattered shell of a robot from Gundam Wing, only the size of a person instead of a building. This must be the remains of the attack robot that Washu was talking about.
"There she goes, Tenchi," Nobuyuki said as he wiped the sweat from his brow. "It was a lot of work, but there it is, the perfect scarecrow! Just looking at this thing gives me the heebie-jeebies! It will scare the birds away for sure!"
"Meow! Meow!"
"Huh?" Tenchi's gaze was drawn to the Ryo-ohki, the strange little rabbit with the cat face that loped through the field looking for fresh carrots.
"Meow?" The little brown furball paused as it noticed a strange shadow. "MEOW!" it yowled when it looked up and saw the ruined remains of the robot. "Mia! Mia! Mew!" It exclaimed as it hopped away as fast as its legs could carry it.
Tenchi laughed and patted the side of the metallic scarecrow. "You said it Dad, I think that this one will protect the carrots for sure!"
"Hi there," A female voice surprised him and he turned to see his mother. Thankfully she had shed the catsuit that Washu had given her and was wearing ordinary clothing. She seemed shy, but who could blame her? Thanks to an absence of over a decade, she barely knew him! "Uh, I've been talking to Washu…"
"Oh you have?" Tenchi prodded.
"She refuses to send me back," Achika sighed. "She says it will endanger the time-space continuum, whatever that is, and change history."
Both Tenchi and Nobuyuki were unwilling to meet her gaze.
"What?" Achika stamped her foot. "Don't tell me you agree with her? I don't belong here! I have to get back to my own time! I have a husband and a little boy who needs me!"
"I still need you," Nobuyuki murmured quietly.
"Mom, this is hard on us, too," Tenchi told her. "I've been thinking about what Washu said, and she could be right. I've done a lot of stuff since the girls got here. I've traveled to outer space and fought soldiers and evil wizards and monsters and stuff! I don't know if I'd be the guy I am if we sent you back."
"Tenchi, what are you saying?" His mother seemed horrified. "Having a mother wouldn't make you weak. Your grandfather would have trained you anyway. How could you say such a thing?"
"Alright," Tenchi looked at the ground and put his forefingers together. "The truth of the matter is that I'm afraid that if you go back in time you'll never come back. History could have you get hit by a bus or something and there won't be an older version of you here in the present. The whole 'history can't be changed' thing could make you get lost in the time stream and you'll be looking at Doctor Who credits for all of eternity. It just isn't worth it!"
"I agree with Tenchi," Nobuyuki said quietly as he put his arm around his son. "I mean we have you here and now. I know missing you for twelve-and-a-half years really stinks and everything, but I don't want to risk your life trying to be greedy and send you back in time. It's like this is all a dream and I'm afraid if you go, I'll never see you again." He closed his eyes and flinched. "Don't hate me."
"Oh no," Achika said, putting her hands out. "I don't hate you, I don't hate either one of you. It's just that I don't know how I'm going to fit in after being gone for so long. What will our neighbors say?"
"Not to worry," Nobuyuki smiled. "You know we're miles away from anybody. The girls have kept their existence a secret for almost a year now. It's no big deal. Just hide out here until we figure something out."
"Yeah, we can handle the shopping," Tenchi smiled weakly.
"I guess so," Achika said sadly as she looked away. "I can't believe I'm marooned at my own home."
Tenchi and his father exchanged worried looks.
"Tenchi, why don't you go inside for a while," Nobuyuki suggested.
"Right," Tenchi nodded. His father did know her better after all. If anyone knew what to say to help her accept the situation it would probably be him.
The boy walked away back to the house as his parents watched him. "Tenchi usually does the gardening these days," Nobuyuki explained. "Now that we've put up the scarecrow he's going back inside to get the hoe. If you want to go for a walk it's a beautiful day. It'll give us a chance to get reacquainted."
"Yes," his wife smiled weakly. "That's a good idea. It will be nice to get away from everybody for a while. I have so many questions."
"I'll bet you do," Nobuyuki chuckled ruefully as they sauntered over to the edge of the forest. "It must be hard trying to figure out what to ask first. Just take a breath and ask whatever comes to mind. Once you ask the first question, the others won't be so awkward."
"Okay," Achika nodded. "I'll start with an easy one, one that doesn't involve space travel or time machines."
"Okay," her husband shrugged. "Ask away."
"Is it true that you spy on the girls?" Achika asked him.
Nobuyuki blushed and looked away.
Next: I'll Understand If You Just Want To Talk