A/N: OK so apparently I suck at keeping to a posting schedule. But this has been burning a hole in my hard drive ever since I got it back from my fabulous beta, mamdi, a couple of days ago so here it is, one day early!
Friday passes uneventfully. I don't see much of Jasper except at lunch and we manage to get through that without any awkward moments. I'm very aware of Rose watching us again and hope that Jasper's right about her keeping her suspicions to herself. Emmett seems to be his usual chilled-out self which reassures me a bit. I try and relax and smile at his jokes but can't suppress the ever-present undercurrent of anxiety that I've been living with for the last couple of weeks.
After school, Jasper texts me about tomorrow and I reply to confirm our plans. My dad's working all day and Mom and Alice will probably be heading out mid morning. We agree that I'll text him when they leave and he'll come straight over.
That evening, everyone's home for dinner. We talk about our plans for the weekend as we tuck into Mom's lasagna.
"Are you sure you don't want to come to Port Angeles tomorrow, Edward?" Mom asks.
"No, I'm just gonna hang out here." It occurs to me that I don't know what time they'll be coming back, so decide to volunteer a little more information. "I think Jasper might come over for a bit."
Alice catches my eye for a brief moment and looks away with a slight smile.
"He's been around here a lot recently," my dad comments. I glance at him but there's no sign of a hidden agenda.
"Yeah, we've been working on a project together for Mr Banner," I keep my voice light. "I didn't really know him before but we get along well now, he's cool."
Alice eyes me again but my parents both seem happy with the explanation. I feel uncomfortable about lying by omission but this feels like the first tentative step towards being more honest with them.
"Why don't you ask him to stay to dinner?" Mom suggests.
"Okay," I say, wondering whether he'll accept. I can't decide whether I'd rather he does or not, but
I suppose it'll be good for my parents to get to meet him properly before I get around to telling them the real nature of our relationship.
In the evening I finish some homework, knowing that I won't have time for studying tomorrow. Then I open my laptop and click through to the Spankwire site, looking for similar videos to the one I watched the other night. There are lots that have the same pretty actor in them, so I try out another of those. I find one with just him and a different guy with dark hair.
I stroke myself slowly, watching carefully as they make out and suck and fuck and I delay my own orgasm, only allowing myself to cum when the pretty dude spills on his belly while the dark boy fucks him. I stroke my softening dick, teasing out the last drops as the other guy pulls out and jerks off quickly, jizzing on the pretty guy's face. The dark boy kisses and licks his cum off the other boy with unexpected tenderness. I'm surprised by how hot I find that. My horizons seem to be expanding pretty rapidly.
I text Jasper just before I go to bed: My mom asked if you want to have dinner with us tomorrow?
He texts back to say yes, he'd like to. The thought of sitting around the table with him and my family is a little alarming, but kind of nice at the same time.
XOXOXOXOX
When I let Jasper into my house the next morning I feel strangely shy around him. This is the first time that we've spent together just the two of us, without having school work as the excuse. It feels weirdly like a date, apart from the fact that we're staying in rather than going out.
He greets me with his beautiful smile and when I close the door behind him, he kisses me, fleetingly but with just enough heat to make my knees feel weak.
By unspoken agreement we hang out downstairs at first. The day stretches ahead of us and there's no rush to get each other off. We play video games for a bit and chat and laugh together, enjoying each other's company and flirting a little. It feels as if we're filling in some gaps, taking the time to do some of the stuff we'd missed out on because of the weird way our relationship started.
Eventually hunger drives us to the kitchen in search of food and we fix some lunch together, scrambled eggs and bacon with some toast. Jasper gets in my way and tries to grope me while I'm stirring things. I smack him on the ass with a wooden spoon and he pins me against the kitchen surface and tickles me relentlessly. The tickling turns into kissing and we're laughing into each other's mouths and starting to get hard, when we belatedly remember that the eggs need stirring.
We eat together at the counter. The eggs are overcooked but it still tastes pretty good. I can't help watching Jasper and he keeps catching my eye and grinning. I feel warmth in my chest when I look at him. It's solid and comforting but I don't try to find a name for it yet, it's enough that it's there. And that he's here.
"So," he drawls, licking toast crumbs off his lips. "What time are your mom and Alice gonna be home?"
"Not for a few hours at least," I reply and smile as his eyes gleam.
He stands and takes my hand, pulling me with him to the stairs. We go up to my room and shut the door, but there is no need to lock it today. We start off just kissing, standing up by the bed. Our hands roam slowly under t-shirts, finding skin to stroke, but we take our time. It's wonderful not having to rush, not having the constant fear of interruption or discovery. We undress each other slowly between kisses, our hands exploring as each new stretch of skin is revealed. Jasper nibbles along my jaw and sucks at the soft skin just below my ear. I squirm into him and pull his hips closer. We're only wearing our underwear now but I want it off. I need to feel all of him, so I slide his boxer briefs over his hips and he pushes mine down at the same time. We break apart to take them off properly and kick them aside and stand there not touching, just looking at each other for a moment.
Jasper is tall and lean but the muscles are clearly visible under his smooth golden skin. His abs are defined and the sharp V leads beautifully down to his groin. His nipples are pale brown and flat and perfect. His chest is sprinkled with a light dusting of blond hair that's barely visible unless the light catches it. A thicker, darker line of hair leads down from his belly button and surrounds his cock and balls. His cock is standing out, hard and ready and my body reacts to the sight as I stare at him. I want him so much it's almost painful.
"So fucking gorgeous," his whispered words echo my exact thoughts and I look up to his face to see that he's staring at me just as hungrily.
I take his hand and pull him over to the bed. We lie on our sides, kissing and touching and stroking with our legs tangled together as the heat builds between us. I roll him onto his back and straddle him. I kiss my way down his neck and chest, filled with a sudden urge to explore every inch of this beautiful boy beneath me. His fingers tangle in my hair as I lick his nipples until they're erect. He hums as I move lower, tracing out the planes and curves of his body with my tongue. His hip bones jut sharply, stretching the skin between them so that it feels like silk in the hollows beside them. I lick and suck at the skin there, watching entranced as it blooms pink where my mouth has been. I suck again, harder now, wanting to leave a mark. When I pull back to admire my handiwork, he chuckles down at my satisfied expression.
I move lower still, ignoring his cock for now. But I pause to breathe in the scent where his thighs meet his body. I feel him tense in expectation and he huffs in frustration as I chuckle against his skin and move lower, kissing down his thigh and rubbing my face against the coarse hairs. I find a ticklish spot behind his knee which I have fun with for a while, then move lower still. His ankles are strangely appealing and I lick at the fine bones there and massage his foot with my hands. I swap to the other foot and continue my ministrations, working my way slowly back up. That knee proves to be just as ticklish and he giggles and squirms as I push his leg up and lick the back of it.
I creep higher, kiss by kiss; lick by lick. The higher I get, the slower I move and by the time I reach the inside of his thigh, just next to his balls, Jasper is moaning with each brush of my lips and tongue and his hands are gripping my hair painfully. I nuzzle his balls with my nose and lick them gently. I suck one into my mouth experimentally, it feels weird but I run my tongue around it and he gasps and I feel the muscles in his thighs tense.
"Mother-fuck, Edward. You're such a fucking tease!" his voice is wrecked and desperate.
I take pity on him and finally move up to lick at his cock, starting at the base and working upwards. I settle down between his thighs and suck him into my mouth, circling the head with my tongue. I stroke his balls with one hand and let my fingers slip lower, exploring the skin behind them. He groans and spreads his legs wider, "Yes… please!" and I move my hand lower still, searching nervously with my fingertips until I feel his puckered hole. He whimpers and I want to do this for him but I don't know how.
I stop for a moment and let his cock slip from my lips as I look up at him. "D'you want me to do this?"
"Yeah… is that okay?" His blue eyes are dark and hazy with need. I couldn't refuse him anything when he looks like this.
"You'll have to talk me through it," I say. "I'm scared of hurting you."
"Okay," he nods. "There's lube in the pocket of my jeans." I scramble to get the little bottle and return, kneeling back between his legs. "You just need to take it slowly, just like I did for you. Start with one finger. I'll tell you if it's uncomfortable and when I'm ready for more."
I slick my fingers carefully, my own arousal almost forgotten as I concentrate on Jasper. He lies beneath me, open and trusting and I relax a little. I bite my lip in concentration as I circle his hole with my forefinger, encouraged as he hums his appreciation. I push and feel a little resistance but then my finger slips through the tightness and into the heat of Jasper's body. He gasps and I flick my eyes up to his face. He smiles encouragingly and nods.
"That's good… now move, slowly."
I watch in fascination as I slide my finger carefully in and out, he feels tight around me but the movement is easy. "Add another," he instructs and I comply, feeling him open up to accommodate the second finger. I watch him carefully for any sign of pain or discomfort but he's pushing down on my fingers, flushed with pleasure. He takes his cock in one hand and starts to stroke it in time with the movement of my fingers.
I curl my fingers inside him, remembering how it felt when he did the same for me and he hisses and as I brush against something inside that makes him clench his fingers into the bedcover. I lean forward and push his hand away from his dick, wanting to feel him in my mouth again. I keep moving my fingers as I suck on him, curling them into his tight heat, imagining how he would feel around my cock. I can feel my dick leaking and aching to be touched but I keep my focus on Jasper, wanting to feel him lose himself. His cock is hard and rigid under my tongue and I taste the salt as I swirl around the head and dip into his slit. He brings a hand to my hair again and his fingers twist into the strands.
"So close…" he breathes. I push my fingers even deeper and he moans, a long drawn out sound that teeters on the edge between pain and pleasure.
I thrust faster and suck harder and he tightens his grip on my hair as he cries out harshly. "Oh… Edward… fuck… yes!" I feel him pulse around my fingers as my mouth is flooded with his hot salty bitterness.
When he stills, I pull off and swallow, then slowly allow my fingers to slip out of him. He tugs on my hair, gently now and I crawl back up the bed.
"That was fucking amazing," he kisses me deeply, licking into my mouth as if searching for a taste of himself.
I can't stop myself from grinding my weeping dick against his hip and he pulls away and chuckles. "Yeah… it's your turn now. Don't move." He wriggles down the bed beneath me and I flush with heat as I realize his intention. "Pass me a pillow," he instructs and positions it to support his head.
He takes my hips in his hands and pulls me towards his mouth. I let him take control and move me how he wants. He rubs his lips over the head of my cock first, smearing the pre-cum until his mouth glistens with it. Then he parts his lips and takes me in slowly, inch by inch. I fight the urge to push into his mouth, watching as he takes me deep. He guides me with firm hands, encouraging me to withdraw and push back in. His eyes flick up to mine and the sight of him looking at me, mouth full of my dick, makes me moan. He moves one hand up to his mouth and slides a finger in alongside my cock and pulls it out, wet and shiny. He reaches round to circle my hole with his fingertip. The spit is just enough to allow him to press inside and tease me with tantalizingly shallow thrusts. It distracts me and I slow my movements but he pulls on my hip again with his other hand, humming contentedly around my cock as I fuck his mouth. Jasper twists his finger just so and I feel my balls clench and gasp out a warning. I cum hard, my hips bucking against his hand and my fingers digging into the bedcover as I cry out his name. He holds my cock in his mouth, sucking gently until I become too sensitive and pull out, moving to collapse on my back next to him.
He rolls onto his side and throws an arm over me, holding me close. We lie in silence for a while. My fingers trace idle patterns on the skin of his back and shoulders and my nose is in his hair. It smells warm and comforting and unmistakably of Jasper. The moment is perfect and the rest of the world feels a million miles away.
XOXOXOXOX
We are careful to be dressed and downstairs watching TV by the time Mom and Alice get home. Jasper and I are at opposite ends of the sofa with a calculated distance between us.
"Hi boys," my mom greets us with a smile. "Have you had a good day?"
"Yeah thanks, Mom," I reply.
"Hi, Mrs Cullen," Jasper stands to greet her. "Do you need any help with your shopping?"
"Thank you Jasper, dear, there are a few more bags in the car," she beams at him. "Oh, and do please call me Esme." She continues. "I got pizzas for dinner, I hope that's okay? But if I was going to cook from scratch we'd be eating awfully late."
"Sounds perfect, Mom," I get up and head out to the car with Jasper to carry in the shopping. "Hey, Sis," I grin at Alice as I pass her in the hallway, heading upstairs with her arms full of bags. "Did you leave any clothes in Port Angeles for anyone else?" She pokes her tongue out at me as she flits past and grins at Jasper who smiles back.
We carry the groceries into the kitchen and put them down on the counter. I start to put them away as Jasper helps unload the bags. Mom comes in and puts the oven on.
"Your father should be home any minute, he texted to say he was on his way."
Alice joins us and we all help to set the table and get out some salad and coleslaw. I have to keep reminding myself not to touch Jasper. I try not to look at him too much but occasionally we catch each other's eyes and the warmth in his gaze makes me tingle.
Over the dinner table my parents engage Jasper in conversation. He seems relaxed and at ease and I let the conversation flow around me as I eat, but don't participate much.
My ears prick up when Dad asks Jasper about his college applications. It's not something we've talked about yet. I've wondered, of course, but didn't know how to bring it up. I hadn't wanted to try and discuss any sort of future plans even in general terms, as we've only been taking things one day at a time so far. I know that he thinks he might major in History, but I don't know where he's applied. It turns out that neither of us wants to move more than a short flight away from our families and we've applied to some colleges in the same cities. Both of us have applied to Berkeley and the University of Washington.
"Berkeley is your first choice isn't it, Edward?" my Mom asks and I nod through a mouthful of food. I glance at Jasper and he grins briefly.
"I'm not really expecting to get into Berkeley to be honest," he says. "But I'd like to be in the Bay Area and I'm hoping I might get into UCSF."
I feel a flush of happiness at the thought that we might end up somewhere where we can still see each other fairly easily if we want to. I try to tamp it down. It's way too soon to be thinking about stuff like that. But then I catch Jasper's eye again and he looks pleased too.
After dinner, Jasper stays to help with the dishes and when he leaves he shakes my dad's hand and my mom pulls him into a hug.
"Goodnight, Jasper," she smiles warmly. "It was very nice to meet you properly; we hope to see you again soon."
I see him to his car and our shoulders brush as we walk in the darkness. He takes my hand and squeezes it. I want to kiss him, but don't dare in case anyone is watching through the window.
"See you on Monday," he circles his thumb, pressing into the palm of my hand.
"Yeah," I smile and his lips curve in response.
I watch him drive away and Monday seems like a long time away, even though I know it's not.
Back in the house I find my mom curled up on the sofa. Dad's gone off to shower and Alice has disappeared upstairs.
"Jasper's a lovely boy," my mom says as I come in and sit on the sofa beside her.
"Yeah, he's cool," I reply.
Mom, I'm gay. I try the words out in my head and imagine her response. I'm not ready yet.
"He has a real warmth to him," she continues thoughtfully. "He seems very genuine."
"Yeah, he's a good friend…" and I think I might be in love with him.
My heart jumps in my chest. Where the fuck did that thought come from? I guess it shouldn't be such a leap. I clearly care about him, I want him and I think about him all the fucking time. I just hope that he feels the same.
My mom is regarding me curiously as I freak out a little over my internal monologue, twisting my fingers into the fringe on the throw that covers the sofa. For a moment I'm afraid that she's going to come out with a question that I'm not ready to answer but she doesn't. She just smiles and asks me if I want to watch a DVD. We watch some old episodes of Friends and as we giggle over the jokes that we both know by heart, I relax and the moment of anxiety passes.