Proximity

Katniss realized with a glum dissatisfaction that she had no idea what time of day it was- really any sense of when. She trusted Gale enough to believe the where- Thirteen- and she knew by the lack of windows that they were probably underground as well, but the when was frustratingly absent. She slept for such long, irregular hours that she had no clue if it was morning or night.

But the hall outside of her private room was quiet enough to suggest that it was late enough for others to be occupied elsewhere- sleeping or attending to business. Then again, it didn't sound like there was much on this floor aside from her room, the larger medical bay, and a few places set aside for strategy meetings. So she could have been completely wrong.

Not that that would stop her.

On the chair that Gale had vacated three sleeps ago there were clothes. They were reminiscent of a uniform; a drab grey shirt and matching pants that looked a little too big for her frame. But it was better than the thin gown and she changed as soon as she saw them, then stepped into her slippers and made for the hall.

She remembered enough to know that one end of the hall only held that large room used for strategizing or whatever else needed to happen. That meant that if she was to find them, they'd be at the other end. So that was where she went. Down past three doors marked private, she realized that the larger infirmary was much closer to her own room than she realized. Even going slow as she was Katniss reached the doorway in a matter of minutes.

That was about as far as her plan went, however. She knew she needed to be up and looking- she knew why. At least, on a superficial level. Laying down, waiting, not knowing what was really going on wasn't something Katniss was designed to do. Searching out the others seemed the most reasonable course of action. But she hadn't put much thought into who she wanted to see, or what she would say when she saw... whoever it was.

Katniss peaked around the edge of the doorway and saw two rows of beds, all neatly made and empty amongst machines and tubes and medical supplies that matched the ones in her own room. She tried to ignore the way her stomach fell in disappointment- it wasn't like she was going to be deterred because the first part of her not so well conceived didn't work out.

She stepped in properly and looked around. The wall closest to her held only shelves and cabinets, but the far end had a curtained archway that must have led somewhere. It was as good a place to start as any. Katniss carefully picked her way there, studiously avoiding any wires with a carefulness honed through years of sneaking through the forest in pursuit of prey.

When she got to the curtained area she peered around as inconspicuously as possible. It was dark in the room, but the moment her eyes adjusted she realized that it was, in fact, occupied. With someone she most assuredly did not recognize.

As quietly and quickly as she could, she backed out and tripped her way back to the hallway. One hand flew to her hair and she ruffled her hair. Her back was pressed flush against the wall between the medical bay's door and the last room marked private.

A thought dawned on her. Katniss turned and glanced between the two doors. She had assumed the private rooms were meeting or storage or something beyond her imagination, but upon closer examination she realized that they must have been rooms like her own. Private or semi-private medical chambers. It was something she never realized was possible. The closest thing she'd known as a hospital was the kitchen in her home.

Steeling herself, she picked her way to the next private room. This would require door opening, and if it was another unknown person that might present problems. Was she supposed to be roaming around? That didn't bother her as much as the thought that she might be herded back to her own room. She brushed the thought away- if she could cause enough damage mostly asleep, she could handle herself now. When she reached the next door all she needed was a moment's hesitation before she carefully pushed it open.

The lighting was dim, but Katniss could easily recognize the profile of the bed's occupant. It would take vision problems on the scale they'd been when she'd first woken up to keep her from telling who it was. Despite herself, Katniss felt the smallest of smiles tug at her lips and light up her face briefly before fading away.

She edged in gingerly, taking care not to be too loud in case he was sleeping. By the time she reached the edge of his bed, however, it was clear that he was awake- at least, in a way. Cautiously resting her hand on the bottom railing, Katniss leaned forward enough to see his face. He was turned away from her and probably had been since before she arrived. His lips were parted ever so slightly, as if he had tried to say something then forgotten to finish his thought, staying silent instead. His entire form was still- the only clue she really had to tell that he was awake was his eyes- they were open, glassy in a dull, feverish way, not really looking at anything at all. She made a mental note to ask someone who might know if he was sick. One of his arms was draped over his side, the other stretched out, hand resting on the meager bedside table.

He may have looked awake, but he didn't quite look alive. Katniss felt her stomach drop.

Seized with sudden, inescapable panic, she stepped closer around the side of his bed and whispered, "Finnick?" He didn't stir so she had to ask again, louder, "Finnick?"

That did something. Finnick's eyelids flickered, the outstretched hand twitched twice and then spasmed. He made a noise in his throat- acknowledgement most likely but to Katniss it sounded like distress so she abandoned her caution and stumbled to his side, kneeling against the floor in front of him. His eyes did not track her movement, which worried her to no end.

"Hey- Finnick? Can you- hear me?" She tried to be quiet, but there was still a desperate edge to her voice that probably wouldn't help him. His eyes flickered again and Katniss took it as a good sign. "Finnick, it's me. Look at me?"

Katniss couldn't help herself. Her hand acted on its own accord, reaching out to gently brush against his jaw. The moment her fingers connected with his skin, it was like a bolt of electricity passed through his frame. He blinked and flinched back hard. His eyes were wild, darting around the room like a caged animal and his breath came in short, tearing gasps for a moment. It was like his entire body was withdrawing from her touch, and Katniss dropped her hand as if it had been burned.

He stared at her for a minute while his breathing slowed and some recognition crept into his eyes. He fumbled to make a word, any word. She waited, tense and locked.

Finally, voice hoarse and strained, he managed, "Katniss?"

Her relief was instant. She nodded, pressing her hands against the bed's edge. "Yeah. It's me."

His muscles relaxed, head lolling back close to her and arm settling in its outstretched fashion, the way it had been before she entered. The hint of a smile touched his lips, even though his eyes were mostly unfocused and still glassy. "'S good."

Katniss had no idea what he meant by that, but she was starting to hope that she had simply interrupted some sort of waking nightmare; that it wasn't her presence that had so startled him but a haunting memory of something else entirely.

"Yeah, it's good to see you, sleeping beauty."

That got a wheeze of a laugh out of him. "Not me. You."

"Well I can't argue with that."

For a moment, he felt like Finnick. Whole and unburdened underneath the worn out exterior and the air of sickness draped around him like a blanket. Her hope flagged though when concern creased his features and his lips moved again silently as he tried to find the words he wanted to use.

"What's wrong?" She asked quietly.

"I-" He swallowed the rest of it and had to try again to form the rest of the sentence. "-Sorry."

That wasn't what she'd been expecting. "... Finnick? Sorry for what?"

But that seemed to be beyond him at the moment. He couldn't only mumble it again, "Sorry, I'm sorry. S-..." The last faded out in a way that made it seem as if it was addressed to someone else. He wasn't present now, so she waited for him to come back to her.

The apologies seemed to upset him even though they were coming from his own lips- she needed to change topics. As gingerly as she had ever done anything, Katniss reached out again and let her hand hover an appropriate distance from his face.

"Can I?" She asked hesitantly, and Finnick didn't pause before he nodded. Her palm rested against his forehead, then she carefully carded her fingers through his hair. Finnick didn't flinch this time; in fact the tiny, languid smile came back to his features and he made a noise of contentment. Low and warm it resonated in her chest and she smiled too.

Katniss didn't consider leaving. With her fingers still resting on his head she turned just enough to grab the chair behind her and bring it up so she could sit on it. Once it was flush against the side of the bed she settled on it, legs curled beneath her. Her head came to rest on the mattress, turned so she could see his profile and once in position she continued her ministrations.

The darkness of the room, the quiet of the place, curled protectively around them. Her broken edges felt a little soothed- the feeling wouldn't last, she knew, but the silent wistfulness of the night let her pretend. Before long she'd have to face the light of day again, and so would he. Now, though, they were in the place they knew best, the place that was most familiar. This was where they belonged, where they needed to be.

Without realizing it, her eyelids slipped closed. She could still feel Finnick beside her, feel his head beneath her fingers. The proximity made her smile and the encroaching darkness of sleep didn't seem so scary with him there, relaxing under her hand. In fact, she welcomed it.

Slumber stole them away without any resistance.

A/N: A little shorter, my apologies, but- look who's back! Would that I could just write Finniss shmoop forever. But I do hope you're all as happy as I am that Finnick has returned!

I've been really busy with applying for internships and research programs, so I didn't edit this as fully as I probably should have- hopefully it's not too bad. Thank you guys for the reviews and follows and all that good stuff! Please continue!