I pull away from Liam in a state of despair. I can't believe he has asked me to tell him what decision to make, I want him to follow his heart of course but my selfish side desperately wants him and she wants him to stay, forever, with me. I turn away quickly, unable to look at him and bow my head as I desperately try suppressing my inevitable tears but I am not successful. I don't want him to see how upset I am but I suspect he already knows. Obviously I can't see him but suddenly I sense him standing right behind me and then seconds later I feel the soft touch of his hand as it lands on my shoulder. Sniffling back the tears I suddenly change my attitude and pull away from him filled with a provoked and overacted fury. Spinning I glare at him again and want with all my heart for him to stay and make senseless and passionate love to me but my mind is screaming at me telling me to tell him to go. Having put distance between us I feel a little better and more in control. I want to show Liam that he does not have a hold over me, not that it is true at all.
For a long time now I have been in awe of Liam. He's not much older than me but he seems to have such a hold over me. If he would I would let him sweep me off my feet and I would be at his beck and call. Like a slave to Liam's love I am. His touch can make me forgive and forget whilst sending me weak at the knees. And it only takes him to smile to make my heart melt. He is the only one I allow to see the real me and I feel he really knows me. Our chemistry could not be faked and what we have is real passion and love for one another so I don't know why he denies himself the pleasures of actually being with me. He seems content and hung up on slumming it with the street's airheads when in reality he could have everything he needs with me.
"Do what you want Liam" I snap in a somewhat choked voice. It was something I couldn't stop happening. I wanted to seem cool and in control but with my mood choked up and emotional seems to be the way I am delivering my messages. Trying to pull myself together I wait for a response but he just stares at me with wide puppy dog eyes. Folding my arms across my chest I strategically flick my head so that my hair flips behind my shoulders. This is to signify to Liam that I will not weakened, this is his choice and his alone. If he chooses to walk away he loses the factory and me. It is ultimately his decision.
With a groan he rolls his head awkwardly as though he needs to click his neck and then focuses back on me, "Don't be like that Carla…tell me what you want"
"You know what I want Liam" I retort with a sudden surge of confidence.
It's all about the chase, the mind games and playing one another. It's how our relationship has always been and even after what happened between us the other day this doesn't seem set to change. He squirms at what I have said. We both know he knows what I want and he doesn't really need to be asking.
"It's getting late Liam, shouldn't you run off home like a good boy?" I sarcastically ask. Surely poor little Maria will wonder where he has gotten to at such an hour. He shakes his head in answer and I can't resist coming closer. Having managed to get my hysterical emotions boxed within so I am just acting on spite I move in allowing my hand to rest on Liam's bicep and I push my face in close to his. In a low and seductive voice, the best I can muster I whisper beside his cheek into his ear.
"Well if you aren't going to run home to Maria you had best make yourself useful here…that is if you 'really' want to?" I order and then suggest towards the end with emphasis on the later part of my suggestion in quite a firm controlled tone.
As my hand runs down his arm and goes to slip away he suddenly grabs it and stops me. One of his arms wraps around me and drags my body back to his where he forces me against him and I'm surprised to feel he is aroused already. I gasp as I allow myself momentarily to be melted. See I told you I am powerless to resist my Leebugs. He is a whole hunk of handsomeness and everything my heart desires. Seconds later his lips are touching mine and I want to pull away and resist but after my request of him I feel myself being dragged further into the moment. I can't stop myself as I push him for a deeper connection and he squeezes my body tight, closer up to his as I reach up and comb into his hair with fingers. The moment couldn't be more perfect and I think nothing could ruin it until from his pocket we both feel the vibrations as his phone starts to ring and the tone gradually increases until it is the loudest noise in the room and he breaks away. Breathless and disappointed I stare at him as he lets me go and out of breath himself fishes the mobile from his pocket. I can tell by the expression on his face it is Maria summoning him and it's written all over his face that he is about to break my heart by leaving.
"I'm sorry Carla" He apologises almost convincingly with wide watery eyes before he runs for the door and clicks it open as he answers the call. I hear him call her baby as he disappears and I can't hold it together a second longer. Heading back to the counter quickly I lift the wine glass and gulp down most of the settled contents before rage takes over and with a scream I launch it at the ajar door. It shatters upon impact and stains the wood as the red liquid runs in parallel drips down the length of it. Heaving for breath and with narrowed eyes I am focused on the doorway Liam just exited through and about to cry when I am stopped having caught a glimpse of someone the other side of it.
"Carla?" I call out warily.
It was daring of me but I needed to see if she was alone and I have been in the car park waiting for Liam to leave. I was here and watching when he arrived and was very tempted to go running up the stairs after him but I figured I would let them have a while to get comfortable before setting a cat amongst the pigeons and calling in. I see now that I left it too long. It wasn't until Liam had crossed the car park in a hurry and jumped behind the wheel of his own vehicle though that I realised. Having hurried in and up the stairs thanks to a kind stranger having let me in with them I have heard her scream and the shattering of the glass.
Cue my role I am here purely now to be the shoulder to cry on and the vent for the anger. I will prey on her insecurities surely and manipulate her around to my way of thinking. I know things must have gone sour with Liam and I pity her because she tries so hard with him. All effort is put in where Liam is concerned and no expense is clearly spared. Now I see her though, she has been crying and is on the verge of starting again as she stands in her kitchenette shaking clearly with upset. She is trying to hide it from me though as I emerge clearly and allow myself to step inside, hoping very much that no glass is going to come flying my way. With a smile I look at her and then subtly close the door as she desperately tries to pull herself together and seem demure in front of me.
"Everything ok?" I quiz her with an arched eyebrow to mark the seriousness of the question.
Biting her bottom lip she quickly fetches another glass from the cupboard and selfishly pours herself a helping with out offering a glass to me. She seems stressed and uneasy as her shaking hand returns the bottle to the marble counter top and she takes a sip. We don't make eye contact as I approach her but when I reach out and go to take the wine from her she allows me. Gently I place the glass back on the side and in a bold and daring movement I move in close to wrap my arms around her. She doesn't flinch or try to resist and I am most satisfied to feel her snuggling into my chest, some success at last!
I just hold her, not wanting to do anything to jeopardise the perfection of this moment. I have longed to hold her in my arms like this since I first laid eyes on her; it was just that I had only imagined it happing under much happier circumstances. For tonight Carla can take the lead. Anything she instigates I shall follow up but I will not press or push her for what I want more than the world. Having experienced intimate relations with such a beauty as Carla I would love nothing more than to go through it all again but if tonight is not that night then so be it.
Coming through the front door I am anxious and find a needy Maria waiting for me in her little satin slip. She always wears it to bed when she is expecting me to perform but I am feeling too exhausted and can't concentrate with my head so filled with thoughts of Carla. She approaches me and in her most annoying whiny voice questions where I have been. She knows how much that gets my back up and I have told her before that she needs to trust me. She wraps her arms around my neck suddenly trying to be seductive and I shrug her off. I am now regretting leaving Carla like I did. I am wishing I had stayed with her and now all I can think about is what her and me would be doing right now.
Standing just to one side of the entrance to the kitchen I am now thinking about her all alone at home and intoxicating herself to the highest of levels with red wine. She will be in a state tomorrow at the factory and I am not looking forward to seeing her, especially in the mood she will be. I am not even back in her good books yet and she is still to give me answers as to what it is she wants me to do about Tony's deal. My mind is so pre-occupied that I have completely blocked out Maria and her moaning.
"Liam are you even listening to me?!" she screeches. She looks hysterical and angry as I am snapped from my wayward thoughts and turn to look at her, she is on the verge of tears. There has to be a way to defuse this situation. Thinking on my toes I moodily mumble that I am too tired for all this and quickly hurry passed her and up the stairs. Maria is hot on my heels, desperately trying to pluck answers from me but I keep quiet and fly into the bathroom firmly slamming the door and lock it. I get a moment of peace and quiet before Maria is outside and she just won't quit.
"Liam don't shut me out"
"Liam…Liam?…Ok well I'll be in the bedroom" she eventually calls out and I am breathing a sigh of relief that she has taken herself to bed. Suddenly I have the urge to sneak back out to Carla but something is holding me back. I do not know why my heart is aching for her but my head is saying no, so confused I start getting frustrated. Catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror I see how shabby I look and what a mess I am. Stopping I take a good long hard look at myself and I force my myself to make a decision; lie to myself and crawl into bed with Maria or flee and return to Carla?
Finding solace in Tony I am allowing him to take control of my mind, body and soul. Slowly he is knocking through the walls I immediately built up the second Liam walked out earlier. Peeling away from him I gaze up into his dark but bright wide eyes. They are shining with admiration as his lips form the sweetest of smiles. It affects me in a way I didn't think it could and suddenly I am drawn to him. It all happens naturally, our lips touching and the metaphoric fireworks suddenly going off. Caught in the passion I find myself melting at his touch and seconds later I don't know how we've come to be in the bedroom but we are falling into bed. I find him irresistible and in a silky voice he is slowly seducing me. Tony's hands are all over my body as I squirm anxious to feel him consuming me and stealing all the pain and rejection I have deep within me. He is smirking as he cleverly and with little effort strips me of my clothing and does the same to himself. I think the small amount of alcohol I have consumed is helping fuel this and I am grateful, it is just what I need to push Liam from my mind.
Tony with expert precision has slipped inside me with minimal effort and now that he has thrust into me deeply he has taken my breath away. The gasp I have given is in surprise but there is no time to catch my breath before he is covering my mouth with his own and is exploring inside with his tongue with very unique movements. Pushing his arms beneath me he pulls me up off of the mattress so that we are sat up. It gives him deeper penetration and as a result is giving us both greater pleasure. I scream when he pulls part out and then slams me back down on him. It's rough and ready rather than pleasant and gentle as before and somehow I feel addicted to it. Biting my bottom lip I try to suppress my moans but am failing miserably and from the sounds Tony is making it sounds as though he is thoroughly enjoying himself too. My toes curl and my fingers dig into his flesh as I feel myself close satisfaction but we are interrupted with the sudden buzzing of the door and it spoils the moment. It disconnects us and all I was feeling is snatched away and replaced with an indefinable emotion.
I jump off of Tony quicker than I have moved all day and go to slide from the bed when he grabs my wrist. He has a serious but seductive look on his face as he whispers to me but in a firm tone to ignore it and come back to him but a force is calling to me. I know it is Liam I just know it is and so I brake away, dashing to the door in all my nakedness to answer.
"Carla!" Comes his desperate voice the second my finger has pressed down the button and I feel my heart skip a beat. What do I do now; I am caught between the devil and the deep blue sea?