CHAPTER 10
THE PLAN
A/N- Thanks again for all the reviews. I really do enjoy them and it is true what all the authors say...reviews encourage you to write faster. As always, reviewers will get a teaser.
How to Win Back the Love of My Existence
--Enroll in Seattle University College of Law;
--Desensitize myself to Bella's scent as much as possible;
--Observe and learn Bella's likes and dislikes;
--Review possible sexual repression issues;
--Regain Bella's trust;
--Maim Julian Yates;
--Get Julian Yates an attractive offer from a hospital far, far away.
This is the plan that Jasper, Alice and I came up with overnight. Alice made me strike out number 6. It is now mid-afternoon of the next day, the Friday before classes start at Seattle University's College of Law. It has been a productive day so far.
I spent the morning bribing my way into this year's first year law class at Seattle University. It took some extra persuasion and donations but I even managed to ensure I have five out of six classes with Bella. I would have made it all 6 but I didn't want to be too obvious. First year law students have to take certain basic and core law courses with the exception of being able to choose one elective. Bella had chosen human rights law, as did I. I am especially looking forward to sharing that class with her.
Jasper and Emmett are meeting with Jasper's contacts in order to ensure my documents and transcripts are ready and forwarded to Seattle University by the end of the day.
Esme and Rosalie are house hunting. Carlisle made some calls and not only did he secure Julian an attractive offer, but he has been offered a position as head of ER at the same suburban hospital. After a family meeting, it was decided that instead of the Canada move, Seattle would be the Cullens' next stop. I had already decided to stay. The vote was to see what my family wanted to do. I was surprised how quickly my parents and siblings agreed to uproot their lives again just to be close to me and close to Bella again. They are really the best family in the world and I vow never to take them for granted again.
I am anxiously awaiting Alice's return from her lunch with Bella. Alice had barely waited until a decent hour this morning before she excitedly called Bella and invited her to lunch. She is going to tell Bella of the offer Carlisle secured for Julian and the fact that Carlisle has accepted the position of head of ER at the same hospital. She is not going to tell her about my educational plans as I want to do that. Another task from the Plan that Alice has been charged with is trying to secure me some more time alone with Bella. She is going to let Bella know that I do not wish to upset her any further and that I am so sorry for my actions at dinner and finally that I want a chance to be her friend and make it up to her.
I realize that starting as her friend is only natural. She has moved on and as much as I want to, we can not go back to four years ago. I must deal with the present and unfortunately in the present Bella has a live in boyfriend. I try to console myself with the thought of friendship. Being a friend means I will be able to talk to her and spend time with her. This is very important and it is actually necessary for me to be able to implement steps 2, 3 and 5 of the Plan. And it is a hell of a lot more than I have had over the past four years.
I find myself sitting and daydreaming about Bella. I had spent a many a night in her bed in Forks, holding her and fantasizing about the two us attending college together. For some reason, Dartmouth is where I had pictured us. I imagined Bella and I attending classes together, holding hands in between classes, sitting on the college lawn on cloudy days while she ate lunch and I helped her study.
I realize I am getting a second chance at this particular dream, or at least to experience part of it. That is if she will forgive me and permit me to be her friend.
Where is Alice I wonder. I am feeling very anxious because Alice had not had any visions of Bella's reaction to my request and I was having to act in the blind so to speak. It is unnerving.
Jasper and Emmett return around 4:00 p.m. They are both carrying books. Jasper drops two large stacks of books on the table I am sitting at first. "I picked up the books you needed for your classes. While I was at the book store, I picked up some other reading material that I thought would help with you exploring....your issues." From his thoughts, I know he is referring to my alleged sexual repression. I scan some of the titles of the "self help" books:
THE NEW MALE SEXUALITY
EARLY 20TH CENTURY SEXUALITY: A LEFTOVER OF THE VICTORIAN ERA OF SEXUAL REPRESSION
OVERCOMING SEXUAL SELF HATRED.
"Jesus Jasper. This is a little much don't you think?"
"Just read them and see if they give you some insight about why you are so uncomfortable with the idea of intimacy."
"I am not uncomfortable with the idea..." I start but I am cut off by Emmett's enthusiastic booming voice. "Dude, my books are better." He produces a large stack of books as well. I peruse the titles:
HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS
SM 101: A REALISTIC INTRODUCTION
SEX FOR DUMMIES
ORGASMS: HOW TO HAVE THEM, GIVE THEM , AND KEEP THEM COMING
HOW TO BE KINKY AND NOT HURT YOURSELF AT THE SAME TIME
Jeez, at least Jasper's books were somewhat academic. "Get that smut away from me" I growl at Emmett.
"This is not smut Edward. These are guides for innocents like your self. Jasper said I was in charge of your education on all things kink. While my knowledge is vast and my expertise is legendary in all things dealing with sex, I can only share so much. Besides, Rosie doesn't let me do some of the real fun stuff like bondage so I thought maybe these instructional guides may be more helpful."
Emmett finishes his speech and it is clear from his stance and the goofy grin on his face that he is quite proud of himself. I pinch the bridge of my nose between my thumb and forefinger fighting for patience. "Emmett," I say through gritted teeth. "I do not need lessons on being kinky."
"Oh I beg to differ. Let's face it. Bella has some specified tastes. This Julian knows how to cater to those tastes. You can't let him beat you man. You don't want to lose out on another chance with Bella simply because you are unprepared to ring her bell." Emmett is unfazed by my glare. "There is a chapter in one of these about fantasy rape..." I cut him off with a growl and am just about to attack when I feel Jasper's calming influence.
"Enough." Jasper says firmly to Emmett. "Edward, we are not trying to overload you, just thought maybe reading about some over points of view on sexuality may help you to understand Bella's sexuality better or at the very least help you to not be so bothered by it. Read them, don't read them. It's up to you." And with that, Jasper retreats to the living room area to play video games. Emmett simply shrugs and then he joins Jasper to play video games as well.
I throw the books aside, and begin to pace. I know my foul mood is caused by my worry about Alice's lunch with Bella. I am convinced that if she had good news to report, she would have at least called or sent me a text by now. She would see how worried I am and sh wouldn't let me worry needlessly....right?
Exactly nine minutes later my dear, dear sister finally returns. I hear her thoughts as she makes her way to our rooms. She is overjoyed that Bella went on a short shopping trip with her after lunch. Really? She has left me here, burning in a tortured hell, so she could shop?
"What the hell Alice?" I ask as I greet her at the door. "You didn't call. You didn't text. Will she agree to see me or not?
"Don't take that tone with me Edward." Alice bristles. "It is not my fault you are in this pickle and I'm just trying to help you get out of it." I try to be contrite and give her an apologetic shrug.
Alice continues: "And I was successful by the way. She was excited to learn we were moving back to the area. She even agreed to come over to our new home next Friday night for dinner. She knows we all will be there and she was actually excited about coming over."
"New house?" I ask and then I smile knowingly. Of course Alice has already seen our new family home and apparently knows it will be ready by Friday.
"Esme finds a beauty for us. It's located about an hour out of town."
"What did she say about the job offer for Julian?" Alice replays part of the memory from lunch for me. Bella is somewhat suspicious at first at hearing the news of a sudden offer, knowing that Carlisle obviously had something to do with it since the job will be at the same hospital that Carlisle will be working at soon. But when Alice points out this is what Julian wants, Bella is happy and gracious to learn a job at the prestigious suburban hospital will be offered to Julian by the end of the week.
"Oh, I almost forgot something. Bella asked for your cell number." She adds slyly.
I know my answering smile is ridiculously big and sappy. "Why?"
"I don't know Edward. Maybe she wants to call or text you sometime." Alice is actively blocking me from her thoughts as she sings Irish folk tunes in her head. She has seen something.
"When Alice?"
"Oh Edward, what would be the fun in ruining the surprise?" With that last remark, she takes off to find Jasper.
While I am mildly annoyed at her refusal to tell me when Bella will try to reach me, it pales to the huge wave of happiness and anticipation that fills me. I am hopeful all will go to plan and maybe, just maybe, Bella will be mine again. I go to make sure my cell phone is fully charged as I await a call or text from the love of my existence.
E/N—Remember all that is Twilight belongs to SM. Note most of the books mentioned are actual books, probably available at your local library for anyone who may want to read up on the subject. No copyright infringement intended. Those books and their authors are: SEXUAL ANOREXIA: OVERCOMING SEXUAL SELF HATRED. BY PATRICK CARNES, PHD AND JOSEPH MORIARITY; ROBERT LAWLOR EARTH HONORING: THE NEW MALE SEXUALITY; HIS NEEDS, HER NEEDS BY WILLIAM F. HARLEY JR.; SM 101: A REALISTIC INTRODUCTION BY JAY WISEMAN; SEX FOR DUMMIES BY DR. RUTH K. WESTHEIMER; ORGASMS: HOW TO HAVE THEM, GIVE THEM , AND KEEP THEM COMING BY LOU PAGET.