Time to Live

Almost forgot the legal disclaimer part...don't own them, wish I did, but gonna make them jump through hoops anyway.

Summary: After X3, Rogue took the cure, and Logan has to heal. Rogue decides to live her life, and it leads her on an adventure of discovery and pain until she finds her way home.

CHAPTER 10

"Marie." He whispered when she refused to take his hand.

"What do you want?" She snapped.

He lowered his arm slowly. He'd thought this would be easy, until her scent hit him. She had to hate him. Leaving her like that - even if she did the leaving. He wanted to rip into something, she was pissed at him, and he was the one left passed out on the floor after...what he still wasn't completely sure.

"Were ya gonna tell me?" He said as he walked over to the bed that smelled like the damned Metamorph. He had a very old score to settle with that bitch when he was done here, but this was more important.

"If you showed up, yeah." She snapped again. He waited, hoping she'd say more. He'd never seen her this angry, and suddenly he had a reason to be angry too. It was his child damn it, he had a right to know even if he'd ra...no he wasn't even going to think that word.

"Just gonna wait on me to find you, what makes you think I don't have better things to do, kid." He regretted it as soon as he said it, and the tears only made him feel worse. "Marie, I'm sorry...I didn't mean it."

"No, you're right, you have better things ta do. Ahm just a kid. Raven has offered ta help me with the...things." She said.

"Why is that bitch around anyway, didn't she try ta kill you?"

"She's mah mother." She whispered the words low enough that even his hearing had a hard time catching them

"YOUR WHAT?" He shouted.

"You heard me, you piece of shit." He was stunned at her, she'd never raged at him, not like that. "You never cared a bit, you got what you wanted, jes' like everyone else in mah life. Mah parents got a kid till I turned out ta be what they didn't want, Xavier got a tool ta use when he needed it, Bobby used me til Kitty showed interest, Magneto used me as a damned weapon. Raven gave me up because she couldn't keep me. The damned Cajun keeps flirtin' and I'm waitin' ta see what his angle is. Ah'm TIRED! Ahm pregnant and Ah don't know who ta trust, and now YOU show up all funny, claimin ta be someone I don't know, and Ahm just supposed ta just go back to whatever the fuck we had, Ah don't even know what that was anymore, and all you want is JEAN and AH CAN'T DO IT!" Suddenly she broke down, and just dropped to the floor, tears flowing down her face, pain etched in every line of her body and he stood up and walked to her, kneeling with her, pulling her tight against his chest.

"Marie...I...I need ta know what happened." He whispered. "I've got bits and pieces and I can't go forward until I know if you can forgive me."

"Its always about YOU! AH don't KNOW if Ah can forgive you...Ah don't know if Ah can forgive mahself." She sobbed.

"Marie...please." He put both hands on either side of her face, and she reached up to pull them away, but then pressed them close, and he felt the draw...her power was back, and pulling him in. He tried to pull away. He'd just gotten his mind back, and didn't want to overwhelm her with it. He had to protect her, he couldn't ever let her get hurt like Mariko...

"Who's Mariko?" She whispered, allowing his hands to slip away from hers, looking up at him.

"She was my wife." He whispered.

"What happened?"

"She...was poisoned, at our wedding feast." He hoped she'd just take it, but no not his Marie.

"Why?"

"Enemies of her father. They did it to get to him, they didn't care that she was pregnant, that the poison would kill her in the most agonizing way possible, that it would kill the baby...she was seven months along, and I could feel him moving." He didn't want to feel the pain again, the pain of feeling his son move under her skin, as he... "She begged me, to kill her, to put my claws into her heart, so he wouldn't feel the pain of the poison." His cheeks were wet.

"Logan..." She started, but he put a finger over her lips, her soft, gentle lips.

"James, or Jimmy as Victor calls me." He whispered.

"Why...why Victor, how'd he know who...?" He couldn't wait, he needed to taste her, to know she still wanted him, still needed him. He brushed her lips with his, and when she didn't start draining him, or slap him, he brushed them with his tongue, begging her to open for him, and he felt her surrender. He moaned as he pulled her close, devouring what she had to offer, like it was air after suffocating. Her fingers were in his hair and he pulled back.

"Sorry." He whispered.

"For what."

"You were askin' somethin."

"Victor. How'd he know your name."

"He's my brother." She pulled back from him.

"WHAT!"

"Marie, it's okay. We worked through some shit."

"He's my step dad." She whimpered.

"Not really...yeah he and the blue bitch have a kid, but he's not related to YOU." He growled.

"You know about their kid?"

"Yeah...I kinda introduced them."

"WHAT!"

"Can we not talk about my past sex life, please. I'd like ta just concentrate on the future."

"YOU FUCKED MY MOTHER!"

"Only once..." He growled. "Almost a hundred years ago for God's sake."

"Lo..Jam...Jim...LOGAN!" She shouted.

"Darlin, please, I really don't want to hear that name out of your mouth." He tried to kiss her again, but she pulled back.

"You better start explainin'." She pushed back against his chest.

"I really don't want to go by the name of a man I killed anymore, okay."

"WHAT!"

"My father, alright. I killed my father." He growled.

He barely caught her as she fainted. This wasn't going exactly as he'd hoped.