I'll always Be There

Chapter 10: No More Nurses

Serena glanced at the clock on the hospital room wall-10:30. Nate and she were packing up their things to get ready to go home to start raising Salem by theirselves. Serena was apprehensive about this. She wanted to be a mother in an environment she's comfortable with and out of the hospital, but she was going to miss the constant help at the push of a button and the sleep. Regardless of whether she liked it or not, they were about to walk out of the hospital to face the next challenge of their life. Serena picked Salem up out of the basinet and laid her gently in the car seat they had brought from home. She fastened her in, which Salem was not too fond of. She was looking up at Serena with her big baby blue eyes and gave her a look as if to say "what the hell is this contraption that has me restrained?" She started to fuss but Serena grabbed a binky and stuck it in her mouth, calming whatever fit was about to ensue. She looked to Nate to see if he was ready to leave. He seemed to be distracted and most definitely tired but he saw her looking at her and gave her a small smile and a nod.

She picked up the car seat whilst Nate got the suitcase and they walked out of the room together. The nurses who had helped out Serena over the last few days were starting to gather and say their goodbyes-especially to Salem. The baby was like her mother in more ways than one. The whole world turned their heads to get a glimpse of her. She had that aura about her. The nurses would say things like "goodbye little Salem, you will be missed" or "You were the cutest baby I've gotten the pleasure to take out of." One even went as far as to say "you are too adorable! I would steal you if I had the chance!" That comment made Serena paranoid, so she gripped the car seat as tight as she could…no one would steal her baby away from her-ever.

They had finally gotten out of the crowd and had gone down to the lobby floor to the parking lot. Nate had called for a cab to meet them fifteen minutes ago but Serena could see no taxi in sight. It was fall in New York right now, and not the warmest of weather. Her baby was in the cold and this did not make her happy. "Did you even call? Most drivers would be here by now!"

Nate was tired and in no mood for any attitude from Serena. Irritated, he stated "Yes, I called fifteen minutes ago. Its New York-traffic sucks. We've got to give him some time."

"Yea, it's New York, that's the point. There are a couple dozen cabs every block! They should've sent a cab driver close to the hospital. I'm not giving him any time; my baby is here in the cold when she shouldn't have to be because a stupid driver is late!"

Nate rolled his eyes. He thought he liked Serena better before she was so protective of the baby. "Then take her inside and wait. We don't have to be outside!" His voice was starting to rise.

"We shouldn't have to wait!" Nonetheless, Serena turned on her heel and went inside the lobby. "Tell me when the cab driver finally decides to show up," she spat at Nate.

Nate rubbed his hands over his face, not looking forward to the first few weeks of dealing with both his and Serena's crankiness. That was not a good combination, because both were stubborn in both their rights. He looked around hoping that a cab would show up soon, else he would have to face more of Serena's wrath. Five minutes later he finally saw the yellow car that would get him off the hook. He went to get Serena but she was already walking out, still a sour look on her face. He grabbed the suitcase and placed it in the trunk and slowly got into the cab to hear Serena taking jabs at the cab driver.

"So how cold would you say it is out there today?"

The man, a foreigner, probably from the Middle East, answered cheerfully, "It is 53 degrees out, ma'am. I looked it up on my brand new smart phone! This thing is the greatest!"

The small man was very fond of that phone by the look on his face, and Nate suspected it was probably the greatest thing he had ever gotten but of course Serena had to keep in her mood and be very rude to the man whose only crime was being happy. "I don't know if you've noticed, but I have a newborn that shouldn't be in the cold. But no worries, it's not your kid so what does it matter? Also, stay off that device while you're driving. You will not be endangering our lives just so you can post a tweet about how much you love your crappy phone."

"Serena!"

She gave Nate another sour look, but managed to huff out a "sorry."

The guys' smile wavered, but he answered "I'm so sorry Miss, the traffic was horrendous, and I never get on my phone while driving, so you, your husband, and little one will be in good hands. Let us get you home now; I know you've probably had a long few days."

"…Then how did you check the weather?"

"Serena, just drop it! This man has done nothing but be kind. Thank You, sir. Sorry for my, er, girlfriends attitude; must be hormones or something."

The man chuckled, "I know how that goes. Have four of my own; don't sweat it, sir."

Nate then gave the man directions and they were off. It was incredible, the man still had a smile on his face out of everything Serena had said. He could've been hostile. Nate was very mad at Serena. It was not like her to be this rude to people, especially kind ones. She was always the happy, talkative girl everyone loved to converse with. This was a whole different woman he was staring at. He hoped it was just the hormones and it was just temporary. He didn't think he could stand this new Serena for very long.

With traffic it took an hour to get home, and for the most part everyone was silent, besides the little conversations the driver would strike up, mostly to Nate because he most likely didn't want to mess with Serena. When they got to their building (they had moved out of Blair's place and gotten their own two bedroom luxury loft for fear of Salem being scarred for life from Blair and Chuck's sex rampages), Serena swiftly got her and Salem out, leaving Nate to pay the man. He handed the man a generous one hundred dollar tip for having to deal with the disfunctionality of his family and thanked him for staying calm and happy and got out. He grabbed the suitcase and headed up to the 17th floor. Serena was already up there taking Salem out of her carrier. He shut the door behind him. He wanted to call room service to order food, but decided against it, because he was about to go at it with Serena.

"Put the baby in her basinet, we need to talk."

"Don't tell me what to do Nate, I'm not in the mood. Besides, she's hungry."

"Speaking of mood, why are you in a funk? You were fine yesterday! And even this morning. Why now?"

She looked at Nate, a sad look in her eyes. "I don't think I can do this alone. I had help from five nurses or so, and sleep, and I wasn't alone. Now we have to do this on our own without any help and it scares me Nate. Am I capable of even being a good mother to her? She deserves a good mom. Maybe it's my raging hormones, but I'm scared and sad, but happy and excited the next minute. It sucks."

"Serena, you will be an amazing mom. Just look at the way she looks at you, and how she never seems to fuss when you're holding her. She loves you, and there's not an instance I've seen to make me believe you're not a good mom. You change her diapers in a timely and clean manner, you handle her so well, and the nurse even said you picked up breast feeding faster than most new moms she's seen. Nobody said doing this on our own would be easy, especially since were technically teen parents, but we are doing better than most. Were also really privileged to have the life we have to provide Salem with a good life without struggling. Look at our cab driver; he has four kids and probably barely makes end meets yet he is the happiest man I have ever came in contact with. We have to be grateful for what we were blessed with in life. The way you treated him made me sick to my stomach, S. That was not you, and it scared me."

Serena's eyes started tearing up. "I didn't mean it. He was such a wonderful man, but my heart was ice cold and my mind was filled with too many thoughts that I couldn't think straight and I wasn't myself. If I could make it up to him, I would; believe me, Nate, I would."

"I gave him a hundred dollar tip. What kind of thoughts? It's best we talk them over, S, to get the problem solved then hide it and it stresses you out."

She hesitated, and he knew what the conversation might be about. "It's about Tripp…" she faltered, but then continued, "we at some point need to get a DNA test, I know that. I know if it were up to you we would just raise Salem as your own, but that's not the right thing to do. If she's Tripp's he needs to know, and Salem deserves to know the truth when she's older. We can't lie to her Nate. I will let this go for two weeks, but after that were going for the test."

"I'm going to go call for food, what do you want?"

"Nathaniel Archibald. You ask me to tell my innermost feelings and thoughts and then you run away when it's not something you want to hear. That's not fair. Don't be a hypocrite and get over here. We're solving the problem just like you wanted."

Nate didn't want to finish the conversation. Serena was right; if it was up to him Salem would be his no matter what. He knew Serena had a point, but talking about it just struck a nerve. "What if she's his? I never want to look at Tripp again, let alone let him be a part of her life. He was nothing but a bastard and doesn't deserve to get the right to associate with someone as precious as Salem, whether she's his or not. How are you going to tell him anyway? How will that work. I don't like a bit of it whatsoever, and right now I would rather just not deal with it. So, what would you like to eat?"

"At some point were going to HAVE to deal with it Nate so it mineaswell be right now. If she turns out to be his, and he wants to be a part of her life, then for Salem's sake-if you truly love her-you're going to have to deal with him. What about family gatherings when he sees Salem and sees a resemblance? He's going to ask questions, and our web of lies will come back to bite us in the ass. You haven't even told your grandfather anything of your personal life. You'll need to deal with that too! We need to start growing up and dealing with our shit instead of hiding it up. Gossip Girl is going to start saying things, and I'd rather people hear it from us than that bitch. Like you said, life isn't going to be easy, but it'll be manageable because, yes, we are blessed to have the life we do. I want to teach my daughter to be truthful, and to not get sucked up in this world. The only way to do that is for us to start changing. We don't have to deal with anything drastic today, or tomorrow, but at some point we need to get out of our perfect little bubble and face our challenges. I have faith that everything will turn out good Nate, no matter what the outcome; because even if Tripp is father by blood, you are her daddy by choice. I'm just scared that if that DNA test doesn't turn out like you want it, you won't feel the same about her. Please say that's not so?"

This was all a lot for Nate to take in, but he replied by saying, "That little girl is my everything now. If she's not my blood, that doesn't mean she's not my world. I have grown so utterly attached to her it's almost ridiculous. She has that effect on people…just like someone I know." He gave a big smile, "I know I have a lot to deal with, and yes that DNA test needs to be taken, and I may not like the outcome, but I will try my damndest to make it work for Salem's sake. But don't expect too much from Tripp if she's his, especially since his life is becoming somewhat normal, for him anyways. Tripp's the kind of guy that is an arrogant prick no matter what, but do him wrong and you'll wish he was an arrogant prick again. He could make your life hell if he wanted to. I just don't want to deal with any of his bullshit right now. You are right though, so that's why I don't mind agreeing. I am serious though, I am hungry, so what would you like to eat?"

Serena giggled a bit, because despite all that he still wanted food; typical Nate. She knew he was done with this conversation, though, even if she wasn't, so she dropped the conversation for now until the time came to worry about that stuff. "Forget room service, I'll make brunch; how about my special French toast?"

They had a lot on their plates right now. What to tell Nate's grandfather-and how much, college and their futures, and if it came to it, Tripp. For now, she was content with just getting on a routine with Salem and live in peace for the time being. But Serena knew that in the Upper East Side, things never stay peaceful for very long.

GG

S/N: I realized I made a typo in my last chapter. I ment to say Salem was two weeks early, instead of two months...I guess that's what I get for writing a chapter at 2 in the morning. Sorry about that. Anyways, I wanted to try to get maybe another chapter or two in of just the two weeks of taking care of Salem before they get the DNA test done-what do you guys think? Wait a bit longer or just get it over with? Let me know. Anyways, thank you for all the kind reviews, reading them makes me extremely happy. Keep it up :) I'll get to writing chapter 11 up as soon as possible. Thank you for everything.

-B!