Chapter Nine:
Damn damn damn! Somehow he still has influence here too. I can't believe I have come so far to still have my past waved in front of my face!
One of the tourists recognised me. I was contently drawing just outside the busy dealings of the market, and the next thing I know there is a stranger asking me if I am 'Jane Eyre'. She pointed at the magazine she was holding, and it had our faces on the front cover. From what I could see, it was from our wedding day... the 'almost' wedding day. The day it all changed. I stuttered that the lady had mistaken my identity and left the scene straight away.
I will try and avoid the pasar markets from now on. Who knows how many tourists know about me and him! I don't want to have another conversation like I did today. I didn't think I was particularly convincing. God, what if people in Tangerang found out? Or the Yayasan Balita Sehat centre? Maybe... information might get back to him...
What do I feel about him now anyway? Either he has forgotten all about me, which makes me sad. Or he is looking for me… and I don't want to be found. Hopefully, he has moved on – I don't think I could have stayed with him. To be honest, I don't think I would have thought myself an ethical or honest person if I stayed with him.
Talking about relationships, I thought I saw one starting when I came back to the shelter. As I entered the main entrance, I bumped into Rivers and Rosa. She is a local girl who helps run her family's laundry business with her mother and siblings. I had suspected that those two had something going on between them. We only ever went to their shop for our laundry needs, and Rivers somehow always was 'free' when she comes to pick up the clothing twice a week.
When I was walking by, Rivers was listening intently to Rosa explaining how to get rid of grass stains from the children's clothing. I don't think it would be a piece of advice that would be used often anyway, as Rivers wasn't even looking at the piece of clothing he and Rosa were holding. He was staring intently at her, with one of the most genuine smiles I had ever seen on his face. She, however, kept pausing and staring into Rivers' eyes. She would suddenly catch herself and move onto another 'cleaning secret'. Of course, she would raise her head at some point and the endless gawking would start again. Sigh, what love does to a person eh? I didn't say anything as I passed by, and I don't think they even noticed me. They were just too involved with each other.
At least two people here are able to have some kind of a decent, loving relationship.