Chapter 10: Losing Control

The first darkspawn died silently, pain evident on the twisted monstrosity's face. The second screamed and thrashed, refusing to die like it was supposed to.

The third nearly killed her. Rayne paid it back tenfold.

It was chaos, utter chaos. Soldiers, darkspawn, faces she knew, faces she didn't, all fell around her, lying in the blood and dust covered ground, eagerly awaiting death so the pain would end. Rayne stayed alive. She stayed upright.

She refused to lie down and meet the Maker. If worst came to worst, she'd fight Death itself.

Rayne laughed. That's right. She didn't believe in the Maker. Human gods held no sway over her. What about Dalish gods? Were they bullshit as well?

Then what would she fight when she died? She pondered whilst slicing the head off a genlock, blood gushing, squirting from the open wound. Would she fight demons? Spirits? Would she not even realize it?

Was there even an afterlife?

Pointless questions, it seemed, in the face of this destruction. Why question Death when it was knocking on your door? It would come, swiftly and silently or blatant and obvious. Entirely unexpected or gladly received.

For whatever reason, she preferred the latter.

Maybe she was a masochist. No. That didn't sound right. A sadist? Well, she did like killing, but that was beside the point.

Then what was the point? Another hurlock died from Blightblood, another shriek, a genlock next. Maybe she'd go after the ogre nearing her?

Too much thinking. She shouldn't think, it would distract her, but she couldn't help it.

Rayne thought of the Alienage, her former life, now a cast-off and rejected memory. She didn't need it. She had Adrian.

The mage, a maleficarum and abomination. She didn't precisely know what those two things were, as sheltered as her life was in the Alienage, but she knew the Chantry hated them.

If human gods hated them, an enemy of her enemy was a friend. Abominations and blood mages were her allies, then. That was fine with her. Then what about darkspawn? Did the Chantry not also hate them?

No. The humans put these dark creatures on a pedestal. They worshiped the monstrosities as a visual representation of all they had done wrong, thus, they were not an enemy to the Chantry. They were actually a good way of keeping people in line.

Another Hurlock.

It was almost mindless, this killing. Run, stab, slash, duck for cover, jump, slice, run, flee, slash. Her actions came automatically, honed skills that she did not control.

Her mind had no power, only her blades.

At least that allowed her to think.

Beating. Why was her heart racing? She was thrilled, terrified, angered and at peace, all at once. This battle was a blur, her hands working circles in the air as her blades brought doom upon her enemies.

And all at once, it was over.

"The gate is ours!" Cheers. She slowly came back to reality, she realized she was breathing hard, her heart pumping faster than she would have thought possible, her hands trembling, blood flowing down in rivers, pooling at her feet. Why was there so much blood on her? A hand was on her shoulder, firm and comforting. A voice. A voice, she heard, but she couldn't make it out. Ray... Ren? Ryn?

"Rayne! Snap out of it!" It was Adrian. Why did he seem so concerned? Why the urgency in his voice? Oh. She was bleeding. Badly.

Fuck.

ooo

"Rayne! Are you okay?" Obviously she wasn't, but Adrian still asked. A crossbow bolt was lodged in her shoulder, blood nearly spurting out. It probably had hit a major artery. "Maker, it's worse than I thought. Healer! Healer!"

Rayne was wobbling now, enough blood being lost to make her weak on her feet. Eventually she collapsed. He still called for a healer, holding her in his arms while she bled out across the ground.

Eventually, Wynne came. She didn't speak, she only worked her magic, gesturing Adrian to move onwards.

He had to leave her here. What if darkspawn came? What if she died with him not there? What if...

"Adrian!" He jumped as a hand rested itself on his shoulder. It was Riordan. "We will need to assault the Market District soon."

"R-Right!" Adrian had to tear his eyes from Rayne to focus on the elder Grey Warden.

"I sense three darkspawn Generals in the city. Before we attack the Archdemon, we should kill them before confronting it. There's one in the Market District, one in the Alienage and another at the Palace." Riordan hesitated, seeing Rayne's condition. "I... will separate from you, to lure the Archdemon to the ground so we can properly fight it. Take only three others with you, the rest will have to stay behind to defend the gates." He gestured to Wynne and Rayne. "Both of them seem indisposed. I would suggest taking Alistair, Loghain and one other person, though the choice is ultimately up to you."

Why did Adrian always have to make the choices? Why couldn't someone else take up the mantle right now? Rayne was hurt! He had to stay with her!

But he couldn't. He had a duty to the Grey Wardens, a duty as the commander of the Ferelden Armies. His companions had started to gather around him, waiting for his next command.

"Alistair, Morrigan and Sten will come with me. If we have three Grey Wardens together, it may draw undue attention. Loghain, lead the defense of the gates. If you find an opportunity, take a strike force to confront the Archdemon and support me. If I fail it all depends on you. And make sure you keep Rayne safe."

"A sensible plan." Loghain smiled. "You have the mind of a tactician. A vast improvement over Cailan. I will do as you ask."

"Good. That's settled, then." Riordan turned, seeing the Archdemon in the sky, roaring, diving, commanding its horde below. "We must move quickly, lest we are overwhelmed."

There was no time for goodbyes. Battles were quick, brutal and the effects lasting. Adrian realized he had tears in his eyes as he led his three companions out of the Market District.

He prayed for the first time as he ran.

If there was a god, please spare Rayne.

If there wasn't... all he could do was hope.

Yet prayers never seemed to do anything.

ooo

Ogres. Everywhere.

The Market District was overrun with them, smashing buildings, squashing soldiers, collapsing houses. Adrian noted with grim satisfaction that the Chantry had been near demolished. The priests got what they deserved, their fear-mongering finally ended.

Wait. Didn't he just pray? And why would he be grateful to darkspawn?

Trivialities. He had fiends to slay.

And slay them he did. His magic tore one in half, another in thirds, one's arms were ripped off, another crushed by his magic. Adrian could feel his strength being sapped, his energy faltering with every magical bolt. But he couldn't stop.

He forced himself on, despite the weariness. The battle was just beginning! More darkspawn fell before him, carving a path between him and the general.

It wore the armor of an alpha, it fought like an alpha, but it was taller, stronger. It stunk worse too. Adrian charged upon seeing it, staff flailing wildly, breaking darkspawn bones, crushing faces, spells launched to fry his opponents.

He pivoted upon nearing the General, stepping back just enough to narrowly avoid an upward swing. The sheer speed of the air moved by the sword nearly upset Adrian's balance, almost killing him when the Alpha came back for a second strike.

Adrian pushed himself back from the swing using a force-field. He fell face first, but recovered in time to avoid a third powerful swing from the General. It was powerful, and they both knew it. The darkspawn kept pressing, forcing him back, reminiscent of his fight with Loghain.

Adrian's weakness.

Try as he might, the mage couldn't get a spell off, each time interrupted by an impending sword swing. Desperation mounting, Adrian dipped into Mouse's power. It would be okay if he only did it for a moment. Adrian felt something loosen within him, but there were other matters to attend to. The General kept pressing.

Wait. What was a mere darkspawn compared to Adrian?

That's right. Nothing.

Adrian, suddenly endowed with vigor he did not know he possessed, simply walked forward. The next swing came directly at his face, but Adrian's hand moved to block it. The forcefield he had cast held, the General struggling to break through. Its efforts were fruitless as soon as Adrian placed his hand on the General's plate armor.

Magic flowed into it, and Adrian took control. The General was forced back, compelled by its own tainted blood, a mere puppet to be used by Adrian.

Yes. That's what they were. Puppets. Every single one of them. The tainted blood that flowed within them was there for him to control. Adrian laughed, a twisted, disjointed chuckle quickly becoming too loud for comfort, a crescendo out of control.

The General snapped in half when Adrian willed it, its body broken, its life ebbing away. Where was this power before? This energy? This vitality?

Mouse had all this power, yet Adrian had not used it? What point was there in being an Abomination if he did not use the power the demons granted him?

Caution thrown to the wind, Adrian jumped, propelling himself magically into the air, landing atop a crumbling wall, his companions struggling to follow. He saw the Alienage. Brief memories flashed before him, but they were meaningless. Something of elves dying by his own hand.

They mattered not.

He propelled himself backwards, landing amongst his companions again.

"Adrian, this area is clear. And...how did you kill that General?" Alistair's voice.

"Oh, I just thought I'd have a bit of fun with it." It was fun. Very.

"Regardless of the amount of enjoyment you have while slaughtering your enemies, definitely not creepy, the Alienage is overrun. Isn't that where the next General is?"

"Right." Adrian ran ahead, companions following.

By the time he arrived the gates were already broken, the elves slaughtered or fleeing. Loghain had been right, the area was completely indefensible. He saw the general then, commanding its brood, using its own magic to set fire to the vhenadahl.

Adrian smirked. It formed a neat image, all the dead bodies, darkspawn with the flames in the background. Morbid, but beautiful.

Time to destroy it.

His first spell slammed a hurlock into a wall. The second caused a genlock to jump on the back of the nearest ogre, stabbing it many times before it fell backwards, crushing the genlock and bleeding to death itself.

"Effective." Muttered Sten, but Adrian barely heard. He was having too much fun.

This battle was almost easy! But where was the general? Had it run, scared of Adrian's power? He felt invincible, drawing upon the power of Mouse within him.

Indeed it had run. Adrian saw it climb on top of a stage, directing its horde to defend it. It knew it was going to die. It feared Adrian, and rightfully so.

Sten charged first, taking a hurlock in the shoulder, cleaving it through the its left hip. Morrigan's spells followed, and then Alistair, cutting swaths through the crowd. Adrian walked. Just walked.

A hurlock, somehow thinking Adrian defenseless, was grabbed by Adrian's blood magic, tossed onto the fires to burn and thrash and die. Next came a genlock, then a shurlock. Both died easily.

Adrian set his eyes on the Emissary General now that a clear path had been made. The darkspawn was cornered, its forces defeated easily by the Warden and his friends. The mage rushed forward, slamming his staff into the neck of the general before it cast a spell. He heard bones crack, but he followed through on a second strike, slamming into torso with enough force to beat his staff in two.

Pity. That thing was made of Dragonbone.

Adrian grabbed the General's face with his now-free hand, blood magic flowing into its body. It too, like the Hurlock Alpha before it, died brutally, arms and legs twisted by magic. Adrian grabbed up the dead Emissary's staff, almost feeling comforted by the taint covering it.

Another feeling of loosening within him. Soon, whatever it was would break.

Adrian didn't care. There were monstrosities to slaughter. Brutally.

He would have it no other way.

ooo

Rayne could barely open her eyes, but she wasn't sure she wanted to.

"There they come!"

"Darkspawn reinforcements!"

"Hold the line!"

"Archers, fire at my command! Dwarves, stay the line! I said STAY THE LINE! Steady. Steady!" It was Loghain's voice, that much she could tell. Where was she? Why couldn't she feel her arms? Or her legs? Where was she?

"Be calm, child!" Wynne. Why...? Rayne realized just then she had been thrashing in pain as Wynne healed her. "Maker, how many wounds did you have to sustain in that fight?"

"Where's Adrian!" Rayne sat up, examining her surroundings. She was in a building, that much was obvious. She could also hear fighting. Footsteps. The door busted open, Loghain standing there in his armor, sweating like a madman.

"Take the girl and get out of here. I fear the front line will fall."

"What will you do, Loghain?"

"I will stay and fight."

And before Rayne knew it, she was jostled out by Wynne and some other man she didn't recognize. She saw the battlefield once before she lost consciousness again.

Men lay dying, darkspawn standing over their corpses. Bann Teagan and Loghain led a charge to fight them back.

She fell into blackness again, not even knowing the outcome of the attack.

ooo

Adrian saw Riordan fall through open space, faster, faster.

Eventually the man disappeared behind buildings. Adrian knew he was dead.

Two Grey Wardens left, then, with the possibility of a third joining them. The odds weren't looking good, but Adrian kept hope.

As long as he was there, they would emerge victorious.

It was with this in his mind as he charged the nearest ogre, felling it with two spells. Even Sten was awed.

But it wasn't enough! He needed more power! He had a handle of soldiers with him and an army between him and the Archdemon.

He had to use Mouse more.

He dug into the pool of the demon's abilities more, power consuming his body. The vitality boost, stamina increased, his suddenly-sore muscles rejuvenating at his whim. Adrian knew he was overexerting himself, drawing upon too much of Mouse's powers, but it was necessary.

Anything to stop the Blight, right?

It was with this in mind that he charged the darkspawn, killing them viciously, felling ogres, shrieks, genlocks and hurlocks with ease.

Adrian had this capability within him before, why hadn't he used it before? He didn't need an army at his back! He could fell the Archdemon himself!

Pride.

Adrian stopped in his tracks for a moment, hand just crushing a hurlock skull.

What thoughts was he thinking? What power had he tapped into?

He had drawn too much power from Mouse, and the demon was influencing his thoughts. Adrian tried to quell it, but all he could do was push it back temporarily. Fatigue clawed at his muscles again, his step grew weary, his spells less potent.

By the time he reached the Ogre General, he had little strength left.

He had no choice. He had put himself in a corner.

Submit to the demon, or be kill by darkspawn.

The Ogre raised its club, preparing the crush Adrian.

ooo

"I'll make a deal with you, mage."

He was in the Fade...no...his own mind. Mouse was here, rearranging furniture like he owned the place, spilling drinks, farting.

"This is my mind. What are you doing? You can't move anything here."

"Not yet, no." Mouse smiled, seating himself in a leather recliner. He snapped his fingers, everything moving back to how it should be. "Nice quality. You know your cows, mage."

"Why are you not in your cage, demon?"

"A deal, as I said before."

"I will make no deals with you. Begone." That should have pushed it back, repelled by Adrians will. Mouse only smiled.

"I'm afraid you have no choice, and neither do I." He got up again, chair vanishing beneath him. "See, I'm in a tight spot, being trapped within you and whatnot. If you die, I risk a chance of going to hell right along with you. I don't want that."

"Hell?"

"Death. I know not what comes after this life, and I care not to find out." Mouse drew close to Adrian, holding his robes tight. "I have lived for millennium, and I have no wish to see that ended here."

"What do you want?"

"I can save you. Save your friends. Save Ferelden! All you have to do is let me in. Completely, not half-assed like you did back at the Circle Tower. Seriously. Uncool." Mouse's visage started shifting, going through various forms, some familiar and others less so. "I will defeat the Archdemon, using your body, so long as you do something in return."

"What do you want?"

"You. Of course. I want you, completely. We switch positions, basically. I am master and you servant. I use my own strength, drawing upon you when I need to."

"How appealing. I refuse."

"Wait! Wai-"

ooo

Adrian regained consciousness under the arms of the Qunari. It appears time passes when you delve into your own mind. Pleasant.

"Did I get hurt or something? Let me down!" Sten complied.

"You were nearly crushed by the Ogre. Why did you simply stand still?"

"Long story." Adrian looked over the palace, somehow cleared without him really realizing it. Funny how things like that happen.

"We need to get to the top of Fort Drakon!" Alistair ran up, sporting some minor wounds. Morrigan was close behind, also mostly unharmed.

"Hey! We're not dead yet! Fancy that!" Adrian smiled faintly, remembering the demon's words.

Adrian would not submit. There was no way he'd allow himself to be fully taken over by Mouse. He would defeat the Archdemon on his own.

"We're close, aren't we?" Adrian glanced at his companions again. All three nodded. Soldiers rushed by, running to Fort Drakon to confront the darkspawn amassed there, and the Archdemon at the top. Adrian winced as he recalled Riordan falling. Why didn't he care before? What happened while he was using Mouse's power? It didn't matter now, anyway. Whatever he did, it got them this far, and now the curtain was about to fall. The final scene was about to begin.

"It's time to end this."