AUTHOR'S NOTE:WELL I HAVE THE ENTIRE STORY TYPED OUT *SIGHS* AND I AM REALLY TEMPTED TO JUST POST IT ALL BUT I CAN'T. WELL HERE IT IS CHAPTER 10.

CHAPTER 10

HE ALWAYS WANTED A GIRL

Fred refused to leave his flat. He refused to read the letters from his family. Refused to let anyone come and visit. All he did was send his owl to pick up more Firewhisky and drank away the days until he lost track of the days. the weeks. It all felt like a nightmare and no matter how hard he tried he couldn't wake up. Part of his started to believe that Hermione was never there that ,that itself was the dream and he just now woke up from it. The only thing that proved it was all real was the ring that he never gave her. Even though it sent pains throughout his chest and made him hurt worse part of him liked the pain. It made him realise she was once his. He remembered how she loved him. How he loved her. How couldn't it be enough? He would do anything for her ,he would give her everything if she would have just let him.

Hermione learned just how good of an actor she was or maybe it was just how thick Ron really was. Whatever the reason Ron believed she loved him. Part of her hoped he would see through her and tell her to go back to Fred, but that didn't happen. She began to grow disgusted with herself. For the reason that everytime Ron kissed her she would imagine Fred. Everytime he would try to comfort her she imagined Fred. It was sickening to her. Finally the days would pass by in a haze and a blur. She would feel like a ghost most of the time, but Ron didn't seem to really notice. Late at night she wouldn't sleep, but take the picture that was taken December 31st. Ginny took it, it was 2 minutes to midnight and he wouldn't let her go. He kept kissing her cheek and twirling her around waiting for midnight to come. She smiled at the picture closing her eyes pretending that he was still here. That the body lying in the bed was him. She crawled back next to Ron clutching the picture to her chest and she cried until she would finally drift to sleep.

Month's passed and they would both continue living this was. Until finally Fred saw Hermione's owl arrive. He leapt over the at least tried he was now always drunk and stumbled and fell on his face hitting his head on the coffee table. The owl dropped an envelope on his chest. Fred tore it open and realising what it was. He screamed, kicked the couch and flipped over the coffee table braking two of its legs clean off and throwing them against a picture frame.

The letter was not that. It was an invitation to Ron and Hermione's wedding. They were being married at the burrow in the garden. Ron asked fred to be one of the ushers. Fred summoned his owl and told him to get more Firewhiskey. Fred went to his bathroom and looked at himself. He hadn't shaved since she left him 2 months 15 days 6 hours and 19 minutes. The memory of her was everywhere he went. Her smell that was imprinted in the pillows was beginning to fade. He looked back up to his reflection and sent his fist flying into it. The mirror shattered sending shards into his knuckles. He didn't feel them though. He was just numb, all over. He walked into the bedroom and opened the small black box again. Reminding himself that she is real. What they had was real. Not a dream. He closed the lid and threw it on the bed. He hadn't slept in it since she left him. He imprint was still in the mattress. He needed her. He still needs her and now she is gone.

'you let her go'

"Damn it where's that bird?"

'You can keep drinking it won't fill the emptiness she left.'

"Shut it"

'I don't think you want me to'

"Why would you think that?"

'Your still talking to me. I'm your head you can shut me out if you wanted me to.'

"Forget you. Where's that fucking owl?"

'You know your the one that let her go.'

"How long has it been? That owl should be here."

'You screamed at her to go. You yelled until she went there. You did this.'

"FUCK IT! I WILL GET IT MYSELF! The useless owl."

'YOU LET HER GO! NOW LOOK AT YOURSELF! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!'

"There is nothing else I could have done!"

'You could have taken her hand and not let it go. You could have told her to stay. You should have said it exactly how you needed her. You should have run after her! BUT YOU DIDN'T NOW SHE'S MARRYING YOUR BROTHER!'

"I know!" he began to cry for the first time since she left. He rarely cried. The tears poured out of him and he choked out,"What can I do?"

'I can't tell you. I'm you how can I tell you something you don't know?'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~a day before the wedding~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hermione was at Ginny's and Harry's loft. Harry was out with Ron and the rest of the weasley boys (except the twins) They were invited,but Fred never answered and George wouldn't support them knowing his twin's state. Ginny had just told her she was pregnant with another boy. Hermione smiled but couldn't fake being excited. She lied to too many people. Ginny was the one person who knew everything.

"What's wrong you seem distracted." Ginny asked

"Well Gin I-I-I. Gin, I think I'm pregnant too."

"But you said you never..."

"well I took the test and look my stomach it's bigger I looked it up and by he size of my stomach I'm about 3 months."

"Its-Its his isn't it?"

she nodded. then added,"A girl. she... She's a girl. He always wanted a we talked about kids he said he wanted a girl first. Wanted a girl named Rose... Then a bunch more he didn't care. Just wanted a girl..." She started to cry again

"Oh, Hermione does Ron..."

Hermione shook her head no and began to cry and sobbed out,"I miss him Ginny. More than anything. Have you heard from him? He didn't answer to Ron's requesting him of being an usher."

"No, 'Mione. No one has not even George. He stays in his flat and owls for Firewhiskey day and night."

"OH GOD I BROKE FRED WEASLEY!"she cried out.

"You were trying to do the right thing and it worked. Harry and I are Happy. The family is happy..."

"Gin, I have a confession.."

"What?"

"I pretend R-Ron is Fred. I close my eyes and picture him! It's disgusting!"

"Hermione, You are not a bad person. Your just confused. Well what are you going to do?"

"I'm getting married tomorrow. Going on the honeymoon and then I'm going to tell Ron I'm pregnant. He will be too thick to do the math and I will keep living like a ghost and Fred will eventually grow out of his state of being find a nice girl. Fall for her and we will all be happy."

"You won't be." Ginny tried to make her friend see reason

"I don't deserve to be happy. I lied to too many people. I erased my parents minds. I broke Ron's heart once and destroyed Fred. He hates me now. Your didn't see the look in his eyes when he told me to go. The hatred in them. I deserve to be miserable. Now I'm about to lie some more. I dont deserve happiness Gin."

~~~~~~~FRED'S FLAT~~~~~

George finally got into Fred's flat and was able to get him in the shower and semi-sober. Fred was still unshaven and he still had bags under his eyes. George walked into the bedroom to grab him a pair of actually clean clothes. When he saw the bed. It was obvious he hadn't slept in it. The ringbox still on the bed. He walked into the living room and saw a picture frame shattered on the ground. The coffee table flipped over and the legs of it were nowhere to be seen. The living room couch was covered in empty bottles of firwhisky. The kitchen was as well as inside the fridge all that was seen were more empty bottles. Sometimes you could walk past broken bottles the glass still spread across the floor. When he heard the shower stop and a door open he walked over to the bathroom to find the mirror smashed.

"Gred, what has gotten into you?"George asked his brother.

"more like what has left me."

"Fred? This was Hermione... Just Hermione remember her the bookworm. You could do better."

"THERE IS NO BETTER THEN HER!" He yelled at his brother and charged at him, but his brother being more sober then him stopped him without a problem. Fred realised what happened slumped down in a chair and said,"Sorry. George. I just. I love her."

"Your just going to sit here? Let her marry Ron?"

"She chose him. She said she loves me but chose him."

"She loved you? but chose him?"

Fred was forced to go over word for word each and every detail that happened and ended with,"And that happened 3 months 22days 4 hours and 54 minutes ago."

"How do you remember that?"

"The minute she left me I wrote it on the inside of the engagement box and I look at it every morning so I know that it was real. That she loved me. That it wasn't a dream."

"Why don't you go after her?"

"It's too late. I already blew it."

"It's never too late."

"Oh, but my dear brother it is. It was the minute she decided to mary Ron. She is happy now. Forgot about me. She deserves to be happy. She was so good. Tried to fix everything. As long as she is happy I will let her go. Even if it hurts like hell. Even if I will never get over her. I can make it to the wedding to know if she is happy. If its yes. I will let her go."

AUTHORS NOT: DON'T HATE ME! PLEASE DON'T HATE ME :( PLEASE REVIEW! PLEASE! AND DON'T HATE ME I KNOW THAT WAS SAD, BUT IT WILL GET BETTER...PLEASE REVIEW!