April 30th, Thursday

So— that was it. Or so Allen thought as soon as he realized that it was the last day of April. The thought has left him a tiny bit bitter, entirely without his permission, so he grimaced at Kanda the first chance he got. It was as they were having breakfast.

Honestly, having a meal together was slowly starting to feel quite comfortable. It wasn't like it happened always, but definitely often enough. Like on Tuesday, after Allen's classes, they had diner that Kanda cooked again, this time with both of them present in the kitchen at once. Thinking about it only made Allen feel worse though. Kanda was just— a surprisingly cool flatmate. To the extent that Allen was almost ready to admit he didn't want to see him go.

Except that it was obviously too late for such revelations. By the end of today, or possibly tomorrow, the man was going to be gone. They didn't even exchange any contact information, too. Though Allen supposed that if they really needed to get in touch later, for whatever strange reason, they could always either ask Lenalee or even entirely use her as a middle-woman.

So, as Allen ate, he was trying to get used to the thought of looking for a new flatmate. It was an annoying task, but nothing he couldn't deal with. His musings about Facebook posts and whatnot were interrupted by the realization that the man in front of him was acting a bit weird. Like he was hiding something, their eyes never meeting.

To be fair, it wasn't like they normally stared at each other all the time. Still though, something was definitely off. Allen was about to find out what way sooner than he could have guessed though. Because, after breakfast, Kanda definitely didn't look like he was about to start packing. Admittedly, that still wasn't enough to assume anything, but it already gave Allen a very vague idea of what could be happening.

"Did you do your laundry this week?" Allen asked, head popping out of the bathroom to stare at Kanda sitting on the couch with his laptop.

"Not yet." The man made a face, throwing him just a short glance.

Allen furrowed his eyebrows. Didn't Kanda want to have his stuff clean and dry before packing it? It was going to get too late to manage soon. Not that he was about to judge. He didn't like doing laundry, either. He always felt like it took him longer than it really should, but was nonetheless necessary.

"I'm gonna do mine now, then." Kanda just shrugged.

When Allen was finished with sorting his clothes and setting up the machine, he had a few things to talk about with a guy from the publishing company he had a contract with. There was a new assignment for him, this time some French history book to be translated into English. Which was nice, it was just easier than the other way around. History books could get pretty frustrating though.

As he was having the conversation, he took to pacing around the kitchen-living room area. It was just a habit of his, for some reason he couldn't sit still while talking over the phone. At one point he felt Kanda's eyes on him. He returned the stare, noticing again that the man didn't look like he was gathering his things. He was just making a tea.

"Isn't translating annoying?" Kanda asked him as soon as he hung up, tone as flat as he could manage.

Allen raised an eyebrow at him with some amusement. He couldn't decide if the man was curious about the job itself or about him, but it felt kind of nice either way.

"You could say that. It requires some patience," he said. "What was really annoying though was getting the job." Kanda's eyes on him told him to continue. "Well… you know," he fumbled a bit, breaking eye contact and starting to prepare a tea for himself as well, mostly just to busy his hands with something. "I couldn't exactly just tell someone 'hi, I have four languages mastered, wanna hire me?' I needed to get certified in each of them and it was a pain in the arse. Then I tried to start working with it a bit too early and got some strange looks. I guess it's not normal for someone who's just an average student with no special background, so— The publishing company I work for right now was really interested in me, but on the beginning they were making a huge fuss about checking if my papers are not fake. Now they're used to me though," he shrugged, trying to ignore the warm feeling in his chest at being able to speak so freely to someone. "It's really funny— I mean, it's all thanks to Cross dragging me all around the globe. Who would have thought he could actually secure me income instead of just piling up more debts," he laughed shortly, absently staring at the brew in his mug.

Then he remembered who exactly he was talking to. Well, fuck, Kanda surely didn't give a shit about the story of his life, did he? This wasn't even what his question was about. He tentatively lifted his head, pleasantly surprised that the man was still obviously listening.

"A-anyway, it's bloody time-consuming, that's for sure," Allen looked to the side. He knew that in the past he was never very keen on talking about himself. But people change, he supposed. Kanda himself did, too. Maybe it wasn't glaringly visible in both of them, they were still the same at the core, but a life-time of new environment was bound to influence something. So Allen was just this small bit more open whenever someone would actually listen and he trusted them. Kanda, on the other hand, was… how to put it? Calmer, maybe. He still snapped at Allen often enough, though.

"Do you think he's alive?" Kanda asked after a moment, surprising the other once again. Was this an actual conversation, then? Allen was impressed. His previous bad mood forgotten for now, he smirked at his flatmate.

"Cross? If he is, I bet he's a hobo," he snorted and Kanda sort-of mirrored it, which left them both just staring at each other in silence.

Nope, nope, nope. Allen definitely didn't just think that Kanda was very attractive.

After that, they split a bit awkwardly, going around their own business. But as Allen was hanging his laundry later, he still couldn't shake off this very strange feeling. It was as if something was hanging in the air. Him and Kanda— what the fuck were they, even. They knew each other so well, or at least used to. But… well, both being Exorcists gave them an entirely different dynamic than what they had now. Back then, there was always something to discuss, the task at hand, strategies and whatnot. Now though, aside from casual flatmate-related exchanges, they could basically only share information about each other. It was very unsettling, in a way. Did this make them some kind of friends now? Better yet, were they friends before? The more Allen thought about it, the more confusing it seemed. Because after sending Alma and Kanda to Matel and Kanda inexplicably surviving through it only to straight-up attack Allen on the street months later, the man followed him. He was admittedly one of his very few allies for a good while since then. That surely must have counted for something. And even before that, when they were trying to mock, threaten and beat the shit out of one another all the time, they were definitely companions, working towards the same goal. Allen knew they have always cared for and respected each other in their own way.

It was only around evening that Allen reminded himself that he was an idiot. What did all of this even matter? Kanda was moving out. Except that— he was still not packing. Allen was very tempted to ask him why, but was constantly stopping himself. He didn't want to give the man the wrong idea that he wanted him to stay, after all. Or, uh, the right idea. Whatever the case, at some point Allen was straight-up staring at him every time he got the chance. Kanda refused to meet his gaze though, looking like he was browsing through job offers again.

Being as absorbed in all this as he was, Allen realized that he got a message from his landlady with a few-hour delay. 'Your flatmate paid for the next month, so I guess you're really getting along, somehow. I'm really glad!' it read. Allen took an embarrassingly long moment to actually comprehend it.

"I got a message from the landlady," he told Kanda later, as they were smoking on the balcony. The man grunted to make him continue and he hesitated just for a second. "You paid the rent." When the silence on Kanda's side continued, he was forced to add "you're staying?"

The man still avoided his eyes, but now with an obvious displeased scowl. "I was busy with looking for a job, you moron. I didn't find another place yet," he said eventually, seeming uncomfortable about the fact.

That made sense, Allen decided. But—

"You— can stay. If you want," he said before he could think better of it, immediately feeling foolish. When Kanda just nodded tensely, he didn't even know how to react.

They both resolved to never talk about it again.