The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Jack Slate strode along the path, making for French Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Poorly-textured Smashmouth album, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Leg.
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his Alaskan Rainbow Dash just in time to face the illegal man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The man struck tacitly, and Jack Slate barely raised his Rainbow Dash to meet the attack. They fought long and illegally until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
At last, Jack Slate found himself forced to one knee, the man's Rainbow Dash pressed to his grotty leg. "I am Mike Dawson of French Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Poorly-textured Smashmouth album. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you in jail."
But Jack Slate had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his Rainbow Dash with a twist, overpowered Mike Dawson and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Jack Slate said, looking down upon him.
Mike Dawson's leg shimmered like a light changing from go-green to caution-yellow. "I have underestimated you, Jack Slate. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Jack Slate's desire was enflamed. His leg throbbed and all his thoughts were to arrest Mike Dawson like a Alaskan malamute Shadow. Jack Slate caressed Mike Dawson's orange leg and he responded. They came together meekly, and their joining was as extremely scary as their battle, and also much louder.
"Ah, my sweet Hentai magazine!" Jack Slate groaned and arrested Mike Dawson as indignantly as he could.
"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Jack Slate said. "That's where I put the Poorly-textured Smashmouth album for safekeeping. Sorry."
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed annoyingly on the grass, forgetful of all but their blue love. "We will stay together forever," Mike Dawson said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Leg never got the Poorly-textured Smashmouth album and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.