Title: The Laws of Quarterbacking
Disclaimer: I do not "own" South Park or any of its characters. The lucky bastards Trey Parker and Matt Stone do, however. I only own this plot idea and the OCs that will appear in this story.
Rating and Warning: Uhhh…T bordering on M. It's SOUTH PARK, of course! There'll be language, suggestive dialogue, sexual situations, you name it. It wouldn't be South Park without those things!
NOTE: Some landmarks, characters, events, etc. in this story who are based on real life people or events are fictional.
If you want to know who the OCs are:
Bill: Football coach at Texas A&M, Stan's older boyfriend
Ryan: Kyle's "best bro" from law school
Oh, and another quick note. If you see something that's all caps, or in bold, or italicized, or whatever, that means that the character is putting a lot of emphasis on that particular word/phrase, or he/she is screaming or saying it in anger.
NOTE: THERE WILL BE A STEAMY SEX SCENE IN THIS CHAPTER! REPEAT! STRONG SEXUAL CONTENT IN THIS CHAPTER! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
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Wendy walked into the party, shooting around at the different light bulbs as everyone was scrambling for their lives. The room was now mostly dark except for a couple of lamps and of course the stage. She climbed the stage and grabbed the mic. Nearly everyone was down on their knees in fear as she swung the gun from left to right.
"All right, explain this one! Stan and I get into one little marital spat, and all of a sudden everyone forgets about me?! I was your school president in Mr. Garrison's class, in 8th grade, and again in 10th grade! I'm the one that got our high school to have Jay-Z shoot his music video there! I did EVERYTHING for you guys! Then you go and throw this fun, elaborate party and don't invite me?! THIS is how you repay me, by taking the side of the tall, handsome jock without listening to me?! I was friends with all of you too!" Wendy says, rambling like someone who just escaped from a mental institution.
Wendy then shot another bullet toward the back wall in anger. She continued swinging the gun until she finally found her target.
"There you are, handsome! You look smokin' hot tonight, Stan! What's the occasion? Oh, yeah, that's right, you probably dressed up for someone. Who is it? Oh…it just hit me! It must have been for that fucker Kyle!" Wendy then quickly pointed the gun right at Kyle.
"Wendy, STOP IT! Please, let's reason and talk things out! You don't need to resort to bullets to get your point across!" Stan pleaded, trying to be the voice of reason like he once was when they were ten.
"I tried the whole talking thing. I left you zillions of voicemails and text messages. I even went to your fucking boyfriend's house and you got the damned bastard to remove me from the property at gunpoint! He even left an ugly bruise on my arm! I'm sorry, Stanley, but you brought this upon yourself. This was the only way to get your fucking attention!"
"Wendy, NO! Please. I'm here now! Let's go outside and talk. I'm sure we can work things out! No one did anything to you! This is OUR matter. Now let's go somewhere and talk!"
Wendy refused to listen as she aimed the gun at Kyle, who was nervously shaking. "Not so strong without your gun, are you Mr. Tough Man?" she asked while laughing evilly. Ryan then got up and ran toward Kyle to protect him.
"Wendy, NO!" Stan yelled.
The trigger was pulled. Stan looked in the direction of the bullet while Butters and Kenny tackled Wendy to the ground and Cartman promptly dialed 911.
"Cartman, HURRY THE FUCK UP AND CALL 911! HE'S FUCKING DYING!" Kyle yelled as he went to the aid of Ryan, who was on the floor bleeding from the bullet that struck him in the ribs as he jumped in the way to save Kyle.
The cops and paramedics were at the scene in a matter of mere minutes. Wendy was promptly arrested, and Ryan was carried out on a stretcher. Numerous people at the party were being interviewed by the police. Kyle and Stan climbed into the ambulance as they were being sped away to the closest hospital.
Hospital.
Kyle was sitting in the waiting room, pacing around nervously for any type of news. The doctors were in the operating room trying to remove the bullet from Ryan's right ribs without creating anymore harm or damage. A couple of hours had passed with no word on his condition. Finally, Kyle got tired enough he sat down. Stan then came in, sitting next to Kyle and offering him some coffee.
"I'm not thirsty," Kyle spat, still very angry at Stan for what happened at the party.
"Not eating or drinking isn't going to get Ryan out of here. At least have some coffee. It'll caffeinate you and keep you up for a little while until the doctors come back with some news."
"Why the fuck are you here, Stan? Go home to the man you chose. I've got this."
"I'm not about to leave you all alone like this, Kyle. I'm your friend, aren't I?" Stan smiles.
"What the fuck is that supposed to mean, Stan?! That you're my friend?! You've avoided me this week, and the few times we did talk, it ended up in arguments or fights. Hell, we're fighting right now! You don't seem to give a shit about me, and merely hours ago, you chose Bill over me! Just like when you'd always choose Wendy over me when we were teenagers! So, explain me this, Stan, what is your purpose for being in my life right now? Because, to be quite honest, I'm not out to increase my friends list."
"Kyle, I know you're pissed at me, and you have every right to be. You're right that I'm the shittiest friend a person could have. But honestly, this isn't the time or place to talk about this. Ryan is seriously injured. Wendy is in jail. I really feel like this whole ordeal is all my fault, Kyle. But please, at least let me be here for you?" Stan said, feeling truly remorseful for his behavior this week.
"You'd better fucking pray he gets better, Stan. Trust me, once all this is over, I'm pressing charges against your ex."
"Hey, no argument from me on that one, dude. I mean, I'm here for the same reason you are. I hope Ryan gets better!"
Kyle nodded, accepting Stan's move toward peace. He took his coffee from Stan, and the two men quietly nursed their cups as they awaited news about Ryan. The doctors finally came in and the two men walked over to them.
"We're still trying to remove the bullet. Unfortunately, we found that it punctured the right kidney and we want to remove it as carefully as possible without creating any further damage. If the operation goes wrong, it could cause more internal bleeding, which, obviously, would not be good news. It's already 3 AM and it will be at minimum a few hours before we can update you with anything else. I would suggest you two go home or to a hotel, and we will call you with any further updates."
Kyle sat down as the doctor left.
"Well, c'mon, dude! You heard the doctor. Waiting here isn't going to do anything. We'll come back as soon as there's an update, I promise," Stan said, emphasizing the "we" part.
"So, where the hell are we supposed to sleep?"
"I was actually thinking we could crash at my condo, but Bill's there and all…"
"We can't go to my place either. Ike is staying there right now, and let's just say he hates your guts."
"I can only imagine. He's always idolized you and hates it when you get hurt."
"Yup. He told me a few years ago that if he ever saw your face again, he'd murder you with his bare hands, and he wouldn't care if they gave him the chair for it."
"Yeah…then your place is definitely out," Stan said, feeling a little mortified.
"Let's just check into the nearest motel. I'm sleepy and I want to get out of this damned hospital," Kyle said as he called for a cab.
The cab driver took them back to the club where their cars were. The place was practically deserted, although there was indication that there was a crime scene investigation going on. Both men got in their cars and sped off to the motel. They checked in and went to their room. It had a queen-size bed, a Jacuzzi, dresser, TV, mini-fridge, microwave, and a small bathroom in the back.
"Wow…looks like even motels are offering honeymoon suites these days!" Stan said with heavy sarcasm as he tossed his coat and hat onto a chair.
"Either that or they like to get people in the mood," Kyle replied back with his own sarcasm as well as he tossed his coat on top of Stan's.
They sat on either side of the bed and looked into opposite directions. A few minutes of silence were broken by a loud thunderstorm brewing outside. Stan heard quiet sobs, and turned around to see Kyle burying his face in his hands and crying. Kyle wasn't one to cry a whole lot, but he did when he reached his boiling point. He got up and sat next to Kyle, pulling him into a hug.
"It's going to be okay, dude, trust me. Ryan's going to make it, I promise. And I'll talk to Bill about our friendship, okay? You're my super best friend, Kyle.I lost my super best friend once, and I'm not going to lose him again," Stan said in his very soothing and reassuring voice.
Kyle's POV
Here I was, crying in his arms. For once, I actually felt secure in them, something I haven't felt in years. I could feel the sincerity in his actions, in his voice, in everything. This was a feeling I had never felt before…not even during our high school relationship. Being with him right now meant so much to me. After what seemed like an eternity, we broke apart from our embrace, missing the feeling of his arms. We stared into each other's eyes. I could tell by his expression that he was making sure I was okay. I don't know who did it first, but in a matter of seconds, we were locking lips, kissing passionately, as if our lives depended on it.
I pushed him down onto the bed, not once breaking our kiss. I could feel him pull me closer as we became more passionate. He was kissing me hard…I knew he wanted me. We stopped when oxygen became an issue and were panting like crazy. We stared into each other's eyes, and I could tell he was looking at me scared that he did something wrong. However, I assuaged his fears when I gave him my trademark naughty wink. We kissed some more, completely undressing each other in the process.
I slowly kissed him all over his neck, sucking on each sweet spot. Of course, as he was a public figure, I made sure not to bite or suck too hard, as publicity was of the utmost importance, and hickeys wouldn't be good publicity at all. I plant kisses all over his torso and muscular arms, savoring his perfect jock body. I then suck and gently bite his nipples. I continued kissing down his body and all over his legs. I then moved down to teasing his balls and then sucking him off. I see Stan quiver in what seems to be a mixture of pleasure and delight until he unloads his sweet release. It was just as good as I remembered.
He then lifted his legs, saying "Kyle, I need you…please!" I didn't hesitate at all. I pulled out a condom from my wallet, rolled it on, and applied some lube. I gently went inside and once I was fully in, I began thrusting inside him, making love to him in the fiercest way possible. At that moment, it felt as if we were physically, emotionally, and spiritually bonded together at once. The moans escaping from our mouths, the bed rocking, and the sounds of our lovemaking were all so intense. I finally couldn't hold it anymore and released, collapsing on top of him to catch my breath. I pulled out, and after we calmed down, I laid down so Stan could have his turn. Stan got a condom out from his pocket, rolled it on, and lubed up. As he entered me, I could feel so many memories from our teenage years enter me. Memories of lovemaking, kissing, cuddling, etc., during our very volatile relationship. His thrusts felt more like lovemaking than merely fucking. As we moaned and the bed rocked, I could sense when he finally released. After Stan pulled out, we began to kiss, rolling over again with me on top. We kissed for what seemed like an eternity, basking in the afterglow of sex.
End Kyle's POV
"Kyle, I lo-" Stan trailed off, as he was cut off by Kyle's phone ringing.
Kyle jumped off Stan and rushed to the phone. It was an update on Ryan's condition, and they needed them there as soon as possible.
To be continued…
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Author's Note: Sorry about being so late with the update, guys! Life kinda got in the way and all that. I hope I did well in this chapter, considering I've never written a sex scene for a fanfic before. I tried to be detailed and frank without making it sound like gay erotica. Hope you enjoyed it regardless!